Chapter 40

In the time it took Jamie to maneuver his exhausted bones up the stairs to his parents' old chamber, the maids had removed all traces of prior tenants. His fingers danced along the furniture as long buried memories began to resurface. A faint smile finally cracked his sorrowful expression when he discovered his father's sword exactly where he had left it years prior.

After cleaning himself up and changing into clean clothes, he poured himself a knuckle length of whiskey and sat on the window sill as the sun began to set.

He fumbled around in his sporran for just a second withdrawing Daniea's wedding band and began twisting it around his finger as he drank; much like he did every night since her rescue.

"James Fraser get yer arse down here for dinner or ye will not be eating at all!" Yelled Jenny from the stairwell.

Jamie slammed back his remaining whiskey and made his way to the door. Out of the corner of his eye he spied his mother's jewelry box. Pausing at the table he hesitantly opened the polished lid. Inside he spied all manner of jewels and metal bobbles that brought back memories all their own. After fishing around in the contents his fingers withdrew a long sturdy chain on which his mother use to wear a series of heavy pendants.

Removing the large silver crest that currently clung to the tarnished metal, he gently strung Daniea's ring onto the chain. Fastened it securely around his neck, and tucked it deep under his shirt layers so it would not risk exposure.

The dinner table was sullen as they spoke cordially about Jamie's return and the coincidence that the following day was quarter day. Ian kept quiet, not wanting to push Jamie for answers like his wife. However to his surprise Jamie quickly agreed to look over the ledgers following dinner, thankful for the apparent distraction. After a final mild spat between Jenny and Jamie about their late father, Jamie took to the Laird's study to prepare for the following day.

After he sorted through all the numbers and calculations needed for the tenants Jamie decided to write two letters of his own.

The first was to his Uncle Dougal, asking for Fergus to be sent to Leoch to join him in his new household as soon as possible.

The second he wrote and rewrote a half dozen times before he formed the wording to his liking. Both correspondences were swept speedily away towards Leoch before the moon rose in the night sky. Leaving Jamie to nurse his drink once more, twirling her ring upon the chain as he tried to calm his nerves before his first official day as Laird Broch Tuarach.

Jenny and Ian watched Jamie like a hawk during quarter day. Jenny was none the wiser as she showed off her handsome brother to the unmarried women of the village; but Ian spotted every fake smile, every dodged conversation and the haunted look behind his eyes.

As the day progressed he turned out to be a generous Laird, like his father before him, to some tenants; sparing those who had nothing from the tithe.

To others he was quickly angered and used his fists to get his point across. As a result of that course of action his household had gained one boy, barely Fergus's age, and a double set of bloody knuckles.

The next few days kept to a similar pattern for the newly arranged household. Jamie tended to the Laird's duties how he saw fit while Jenny and Ian ran the main household. But when the sun set and Jenny went off to bed, Ian tried to share a nightcap with Jamie in hopes he could get him to open up; but it always ended the same. After reminiscing and sharing old war stories Ian would retire leaving Jamie by himself.

As the sun rose on his first week at Lallybroch a cheerful young lad on a small pony jostled into the courtyard with the courier from Castle Leoch. A genuine smile graced Jamie's face as he hurried to greet the boy.

"My Lord!" Fergus shouted as he jumped down from his mount and embraced the highlander.

"How are ye lad?"

"Well my lord." Fergus smiled taking in his new surroundings.

" M'Laird?" The courier called bowing at the waist, his hand stretched out to hand over a thick envelope.

Jamie nodded, his attitude shifting back in an instant.

"Thankyou, please go rest."

The man took his leave of Jamie, leaving him to introduce Jenny who looked on in puzzlement.

"Jenny...Ian...this wee lad is Fergus. My ward that I told ye about." Jamie stated, patting Fergus on the back heartily. "He had been staying at Leoch since we returned from Jared's."

"Bonjour." Fergus greeted, his nerves making him appear jittery as they just stared on in silence.

"Nice to meet ya Lad," Ian finally interjected with as much kindness as he could muster. "I bet a growing lad like yerself is starving. Go run on inside and find yourself some breakfast. There will be a couple boys in the kitchen that will help ye around. Jamie and Rabbie."

It took no time at all before the three boys were thick as thieves running around the grounds of Lallybroch. Much like Jamie, Ian and Willy had at their age.

That afternoon while Jamie was working on shoeing a few of the estates horses, the trio of boys came running up with a message.

"M' Laird, Mrs. Crook wanted us to let you know the mill wheel is broken. Do you want her to send for someone to come repair it?" Rabbie asked, out of breath from their sprint up the hill.

Jamie rolled his eyes at the request.

"Nah... tell her dinna fash. I will fix it myself … Oh! Fergus! I need ye to take this and put it in my room fer me, it's very important."

Fergus nodded, taking the thick envelope from his hand with an amused expression and sprinted off after the other boys towards the manor.

"Damn. Must be something stuck under the sluice." Jamie muttered to himself as he looked over the broken mill wheel. The decision took a split second to make as he unlatched his belt and allowed his kilt to drop to the ground, leaving him bare except for his paper thin shirt.

He made his way down into the mill pond chased closely by the loud ranting of Jenny closing in on him.

"Ye stupid fool! I didn't want to believe it when Mrs. Crook informed me ye had come up here."

Jamie grinned like a cat who stole a pot of cream as he descended deeper, her threats increasing in severity as he dove under the frigid water.

It took him only a few seconds to find the large stone that had wedged under the wheel and a few more for him to maneuver it out of the way. But as he began his ascension his chain caught on a drowned root; and as he yanked away from the tension it snapped and the ring plummeted to the bottom of the mill pond.

Panic engulfed him as he dove down hard, back into the dark depths after his prized possession. A minute passed and Jenny began to worry, then after a couple more she began to fear for her stubborn brother's life.

An eternity later, Jamie finally burst through the surface, his fist cupped hard against his chest as he heaved up water from his lungs.

Jenny, ready to give him the thrashing he deserved, stopped dead in her tracks as she looked upon Jamie's newly exposed back. During his treacherous dive the fabric must have snagged and ripped allowing his darkest secret to shine through, secretly silencing his sister.

Jamie was far too distracted by his almost loss to worry why his sister was running back towards the manor without scolding him. Glancing around to see if she was far enough away he opened his frozen fist, lying in his palm was the petite ring and chain, his death grip relaxing just enough to allow blood to finally flow back to his fingers.

It was nearing dinner time when he made it back to the manor. He was wishing to quickly change his ruined shirt but the envelope he had Fergus deposit upon his bed beckoned him toward it, urging him to reveal the contents.

Gently he broke the wax seal allowing a mound of papers to fall upon his desk. The top was a return letter that stated.

James,

I must say I was incredibly surprised to receive your letter requesting a formal annulment from Mistress Fraser. However. On your behalf as the MacKenzie representation, I broached the topic with Daniea. After some considerable time, she has graciously decided to agree to your wishes without any terms of her own. Enclosed is Daniea's testimony and the necessary documents with which you must sign to permanently finalize the separation and end your marriage.

P.S

As a friend, I truly hope you rethink this decision.

~Ned Gowan