So, here is the first chapter of the second year. I never expected this story to become so popular. At the moment of writing this, this story has 1624 followers, 1205 has added it to their favourites, it has 213 595 views, 324 reviews and has been added to 17 communities. Thank you all for enjoying what I have written.

Shiny teeth and me

Eight weeks had passed, and it was now the middle of August. Having received his Hogwarts letter a few days ago, Halios was currently performing his morning routine (running a few laps around the realm, lifting a boulder, meditating in order to become one with the realm… y'know, the usual godly stuff), before he was to meet the Black-Weiss, Granger and Longbottom families at the Leaky Cauldron, so that they could go shopping.

Finishing up, he went and had a bath before getting dressed to leave. Remaining in male form, Halios dressed in a loose, white tunic, held up by a leather belt, and leather sandals. Grabbing a money pouch, he opened a portal to the alley between the Leaky Cauldron and the gate to Diagon Alley, and stepped through. Entering the pub, he honed in on his friends and their families.

"Hello." He greeted when he came closer to them.

"Hi Halios!"

Seren was the first to greet him, but Sirius was right behind her. Neville and Hermione also greeted him, but as they hadn't seen his male form before, they were a bit hesitant at first. Hermione's parents and the Dowager Longbottom, on the other hand, didn't know what to think.

"Uhm, excuse me, Halios?" Mrs. Granger asked. "But weren't you a… girl?"

Turning towards the confused parents, Halios began to explain.

"While you have met me as a female, is not my true gender." He said. "I was born as a male human, but after being adopted, that is no longer the case. You see, my parents are beings of pure magic, and as such, I'm turning into one such being myself. At this point in time, I'm still partly human, and as such is bound to a human form, but not to a gender. In a few years, the change will be complete, and I'll be able to take any form I would want."

"Riiight…" Mr. Granger said, still utterly confused. "So, are you a boy or a girl?"

"I'm both and neither." Halios said with a chuckle. "So just go with what feels natural for you."

"Right then." Sirius said, snapping the Grangers out of their confusion. "Now that we're all here, let us go."

As the group left the pub, he continued; "We'll begin with a visit to Gringotts, so that those who need some funds can get them. After that, well… it'll be up to the young ones."

Tapping his wand on the wall, he opened the gateway to the Diagon Alley. Stepping through, they noticed that there were a lot more people in the Alley than usual. Interesting enough, most of them appeared to be female, and they were gathering outside Flourish and Blotts. As they got closer to the bank, they could see why so many had gathered there. Apparently, there was a book signing event that day, but they couldn't really see who it was supposed to be. In an attempt to find out, Seren went closer, only to come back with a look of disgust on her face. When asked why, she simply replied; "Lockheart."

Seeing the disgusted look on Seren, Sirius and the Longbottom's faces, Halios asks; "Who is this 'Lockheart'?"

"Gilderoy Lockheart," Sirius explains, "is a 'writer' who uses his good look to sell his books to any female he can. His books are not very good, and are frankly not worth the paper they are written on. The only reason he is so famous, is because of his 'good' looks."

"Ah…" Halios says with a nod, before realizing something. "Doesn't that mean that the Professor for DADA this year is a female, as all of Lockhearts books are listed as course literature in the Hogwarts letter?"

Taking out their letters, the other looks at it and realizes that Halios is correct.

"Well, damn…" Sirius says, before turning towards the Grangers. "Look, I know that you most likely don't want this, but when we are at Gringotts, I'll transfer some funds to you."

He holds up a hand to stop any complains.

"I wouldn't normally do such a thing, but you have to understand something." He points at the book store. "Lockheart has written ten books, all of which are set as course literature, and each book costs about ten Galleons. That's a hundred Galleons right there, plus everything else on the list. Now, I don't know how your economy is, but an average family can't afford such a thing. So please, let me help you with those books."

The Grangers looked at each other, before Mr. Granger sighed.

"Fine… We will let you pay for the books, but only because you asked nicely."

"Thank you for indulging me in this." Sirius said with a smile.

"And for your information, we can afford it just fine, thank you very much. Our clinic is doing well, and as a one-time payment, we can easily afford it."

"Really?" Sirius said with a raised eyebrow. "Then I'm sorry if I insulted you, but, you have to understand… The average Ministry employee earns only about 10-15 Galleons a month, a department head, about 20 and the Minister 40."

"But that's not feasible!" Mr. Granger exclaimed with a frown. "I make more each day than your Minister does each month! How can you people afford to live?!"

"While magic can't create food, it can easily multiply it." Sirius answers with a shrug. "The same is true about most non-magical items. That means, things which in the Muggle world cost a large sum of money, is almost free here. The monthly cost for food for a family of four, lies around 2 Galleons, depending on the products bought. A new house can be built in less than three days, and – depending on size – cost as low as 5 Galleons. Expansion charms are a wonderful thing, you know. A 200 square feet house can become a 2000 square feet house, if the right charms are applied."

The Grangers just shook their heads, having a hard time processing how cheap it was to live in the Wizarding world. While they had been talking, they had reached Gringotts. Entering the bank, the Grangers left to exchange their pounds for Galleons and the Black-Weiss and Longbottom families went to get some gold out of their vaults. Halios waited in the foyer, as he already had his money.

Some ten minutes later, they left the bank and began shopping. As they moved through Diagon Alley, they met several of their classmates, though no-one recognized Halios. Many of the girls they met asked if Halios was Serens boyfriend, but Halios only laughed as Seren turned crimson before telling them who he was and that he could change shape at will. He knew that the knowledge of his ability would spread, but he didn't really care, after all, they couldn't really do anything to him and even if he was killed, his spirit would simply return to his realm, and his body reform.

Soon, they had most of what they needed, with the books the only thing left. As they drew closer to Flourish and Blotts, they could see that a crowd had gathered around the store. When they were some 60 feet away, Sirius and the Dowager Longbottom could recognize some of those gathered there. Most recognizable was the ginger brood of the Weasley family, with the patriarch of the family, Arthur Weasley, standing in front of them, talking with someone. Sirius was the first to recognize said person; Lucius Malfoy, the Lord of the Lesser House of Malfoy.

The House of Malfoy and the House of Weasley had a longstanding distaste of each other. The House of Malfoy had taken the noble status from the House of Weasley some three hundred years earlier, when they came from France and tricked the then Lord Weasley into attacking the Head of House Malfoy during a Wizengamot meeting, getting the noble status from the House of Weasley in compensation.

Just as they reached the crowd, Lucius Malfoy said something which made Arthur Weasley jump at him with the intent to do bodily harm. Having no time to react, Lucius was tackled into a bookshelf and just like that, any thoughts about magic was gone. The two men started to try to pummel one another, while rolling around on the floor. Next to them, the only Malfoy child and the youngest boy of the Weasley brood were doing the same. The Weasley Twins were shouting encouraging words to their father, whilst simultaneously taking bets about who would win (so far, the odds were 3:1 on Malfoy). The Weasley matriarch were shouting at her husband to stop, whilst hugging her youngest child (a daughter) from behind.

Sirius started to push through the crowd in order to stop them, but was beaten to the punch by Hagrid, who physically lifted the two men and pulled them apart. But before he could admonish them, a voice was heard.

"Oh dearie me, there is no need to fight. There are enough copies of my books for every one!"

Looking towards the back of the shop, they could see a man walking towards then. The man was dressed in light pink robes, his hair was blond and wavy, and he had a large smile that showed his brilliant white teethes to everyone.

Around them, the older witches had a look of adoration on their faces, whilst the men (and the muggle women) had a look of disgust on theirs.

Seeing the smiling man, Lucius Malfoy sneered, before reaching down and picking up his cane and an old book, which had fallen out of a cauldron during his scuffle with Arthur Weasley. Taking a look at the book, he sneered again before tossing it back into the cauldron and leaving. He only stopped for a moment in order to grab the shoulder of his son, and then both Malfoys left the store.

This was completely ignored by the man (who clearly was this Lockheart fellow), since he was busy basking in the adoration that came from the many females gathered around him. After a few moments of acting like a peacock, he smiled and spoke up.

"Now, I have an announcement to make. As you all know, Hogwarts offers the greatest magical education in the world, but this year, it will be even greater!"

As Lockheart spoke, Halios looked at Seren, noticing the look of horror that was dawning on her face.

"That's right!" Lockheart continued. "This year, me, Gilderoy Lockheart, Order of Merlin third Class and member of the Dark Force Defence League, will be the Professor for the Defence Against the Dark Arts!"

At this point, Seren looked to be almost physically ill, so Halios led her out of the store in order to get away from the idiot. The rest of the group followed, and they all left in order to get some ice cream.

Some ten minutes later, they were all sitting outside Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour, eating ice cream and trying to digest what they had just learned.

"Well, at least we know why all Lockheart's books were added as course material." Halios said after a few moments.

"Please don't remind me…" Seren mumbled, stabbing her ice cream with a spoon. "This year is going to be hell, I just know it…"

"Surely it can't be that bad?" Hermione asked. "I mean… sure, he seemed a bit foppish, but he has to have some skills, otherwise Dumbledore wouldn't have hired him as a professor."

"Don't be so sure about that, Miss Granger." Sirius said. "For the last twenty or so years, no professor teaching DADA has ever stayed for more than a year. Some, didn't even last a full term. This has led people to say that the job is cursed, and those rumours makes it very hard to find people willing to teach it. As such, Lockheart might have been the only one to actually apply for the job, forcing Dumbledore to hire him."

"And besides," he continues, "the timeline in his books doesn't add up. For example; in one book, he claims to be fighting werewolves in Transylvania, whilst in another, he claims to be on the hunt for a Yeti in the Himalayas, at the same date!"

Hermione looks shocked.

"But-but… that would make them fiction! How can we possible use them as school books if they contain no truths?!"

"That's the thing." Sirius answers her with a shrug. "There are no laws against this kind of thing, and most magicals are too lazy to actually research things on their own. Instead, they take what is printed for the complete truth."

This causes Hermione to become speechless, and they spent the next thirty minutes in silence whilst eating their ice cream. When they were done, they saw that the crowd at Flourish and Blotts had started to disperse, meaning that the fraud wasn't there anymore. Going back to the store, they finished with the shopping, and left for the Leaky Cauldron.

Once there, they said their goodbyes and after saying that they would see each other on September 1st, they all left for home.

Stepping out of the portal, and back in his realm, Halios went to his room. Unpacking the books he had bought, he opened one of Lockheart's.

Two minutes later, he closed it again, disgusted with its content. He decided that, if Lockheart truly was as narcissistic and stupid as he made himself out to be in his books, then he better bring the Wabbajack with him to school. After all, who knows what a person who thinks you can defeat a Draugr (it said Inferius in the book, but an animated corpse is an animated corpse, no matter what you call it) with a salt shaker would release upon the class.

Putting his things away, Halios made himself ready for the evening. Soon, it was time to return to Hogwarts.

And that's that. The next chapter will be the train ride to Hogwarts. Next story to be updated is Hollow Magic. I will not set an estimated date for that one, as we now enter Bleach territory, and I will have to do some research in order to get things right.

Until next time, enjoy.

Baleygr