Moving up the steps to the manor, Elizabeth Shelby pushed the front door open with ease. Tilting her head back, she looked around the foyer. It was eerily quiet, which proved to be quite menacing. She moved her hands to take her hat from the top of her head, hanging it up on the coat rack. She dropped her small case onto the floor by her feet before moving out of her red coat, hanging that up with her coat.
Moving over the floor, her heels clicked on the ground as she entered the study, half expecting to find her husband in there. She didn't. The room was empty, Elizabeth frowning at the stacks of paper on the desk. She sighed and rolled the sleeves to her shite shirt up before tugging a hand through her hair and turning on her heel. She walked through to the dining room and then down to the kitchen. Frances was there, hunched over the table and chopping vegetables.
"Mrs Shelby," she startled as soon as Elizabeth appeared in the doorway. "I'm sorry…I didn't expect you back this soon."
"I caught the first boat home," Elizabeth said. "Where is Charlotte?"
"She is out for the day with her Aunt Pol," Frances said to her. "I didn't know what else I could do…she…she saw him and she…I just thought that she should get away."
"What happened?" Elizabeth asked Frances. "What did she see?"
"He has been drinking," Frances whispered, almost sounding ashamed to discuss Tommy while he was not there. "He has been drinking and smoking and he hasn't been the same. He's been distant. It's been scary, Mrs Shelby. He's scared her."
"Where is he?" Elizabeth wondered, her tone soft.
"In the bedroom," Frances said. "He's stopped drinking, but he still isn't himself."
"Thank you," Elizabeth said in a soft voice. "For everything."
"I should have done more," Frances said and Elizabeth shook her head as the elder woman sounded broken. Moving to embrace her, Frances stiffened before relaxing into the embrace, holding Elizabeth back. "I wish that I had done more."
"No," Elizabeth said to her. "You did what you could, Frances. Tommy…he…he is my husband and my responsibility. I should have come home sooner. I should have come back quicker."
"He wouldn't let me call you," Frances said with a sad shake of her head as she pulled back. "He didn't want to trouble you."
Elizabeth sighed and nodded once, "Sounds like Tommy," she whispered. "You stay here, Frances. I will go and talk to him."
Stepping out of the kitchen, Elizabeth climbed the stairs to the landing, walking along the carpet until she came to the bedroom. Pushing the door open, her eyes adjusted to the darkness and she saw him perched on the bed. His glasses were on his face and he was reading a newspaper. He was dressed in a vest tucked into his trousers, his socks askew on his feet. Looking up as the door opened, Tommy looked to see his wife stood in the doorway.
"What are yer doin' 'ere?" he asked and Elizabeth managed to roll her eyes as she stepped into the room that smelled like smoke.
"Nice to see you too," she commented to her husband, wandering towards the bed. Sitting down next to her husband as he folded his newspaper up and tossed it to the side. Tommy looked over to her, his face stoic as she examined him, swearing that he looked thinner than usual. His cheekbones were more prominent and his eyes were hooded.
"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked from him, a hand going to his cheek.
"Because yer were busy in France," Tommy told his wife. "Yer 'ad Mary."
"I have you too," Elizabeth said to her husband, her thumb roaming along his cheekbone. "You are my husband, Tommy. If you are ill then you should have told me. I haven't seen you like this before…never before…"
"It's when I rest," Tommy told his wife. "It's when I rest and it comes back to me…everythin'…what 'appened in France…what I saw…it all comes floodin' back because I think about it, because I am bored. I can't stop it. So I drink. I drink to make me forget, but it doesn't work."
Elizabeth sighed softly at hearing him, her hand moving up to sweep through his hair as he moved a hand to catch hers. Holding it in his grip, he moved it from his skin and kissed the back of her hand. She let her fingers tangle in his as she watched him.
"I knew you had nightmares," Elizabeth said in a soft voice. "I know that they come back to you, but…this…Tommy…"
"It only 'appened once before when I first got back and yer weren't with me," Tommy admitted to his wife. "It stopped as soon as I got involved in the business, but the past few months I've not 'ad that. I 'aven't 'ad the business. I need to go back."
"Okay," Elizabeth said with a nod. A part of her had wondered if her husband would feel better once he had taken some time off. Would he want to be content with the business they had? Would he not want it to grow anymore and spend more time just being at home and resting? It seemed that she had her answer now. Tommy Shelby didn't do rest. "You can go back to work, but you are going to get better first, understand?"
"I am fine now, Liz," Tommy said to his wife and she scoffed, her eyes rolling.
"No, you are not, Tommy," she responded. "And it is fine to say that you are not. You are thinner than normal and you look tired. You look drained. You are not going back to work until you are better."
Tommy didn't bother arguing with his wife. A part of him was simply glad that she had come back to him. Elizabeth was back and a part of Tommy knew that he could get through anything with her by his side.
"Liz," Tommy began, "Charlotte saw me...she saw me like this."
"I know," Elizabeth whispered, "but she is young, Tommy. She will not understand entirely what has happened. She will just know that you were ill. That is all that she needs to know."
"I shouldn't 'ave done what I did," Tommy said in a whisper. "But she is my daughter, Liz. She is our daughter and she thinks that I'm perfect. She thinks I've never done anythin' bad."
"Because you are her father," Elizabeth said. "Tommy, I grew up knowing who my father was, but that was because he never entirely loved me as you love Charlotte. She knows that. She knows that you will do anything to keep her safe…how you do it…what you have done…she will understand when she is older. She will see that."
"How can yer be so sure?"
"Because she will never stop loving you," Elizabeth responded. "Nothing will ever change that."
Tommy wanted to protest, but he knew that Elizabeth would simply disagree with him. She would promise him that nothing would ever happen. Elizabeth and Charlotte would always be there for him. Elizabeth knew what Tommy had done, but she knew that he wasn't a bad man. He was complicated and she had grown to accept that.
"I'm goin' to change," Tommy said in a soft voice. "I'm goin' to make Charlotte proud of me. I'm goin' to do it, Liz. I am finally goin' to do it."
"Do what?" Elizabeth wondered, her brows furrowed together.
"I'm goin' to run for MP."
Elizabeth almost laughed once at hearing him, but his face told her that he was being deadly serious. It was another moment before she managed to compose her face, turning serious as she watched him.
"You're serious?" she asked from him.
"Deadly," Tommy said. "I know exactly how I can get myself secured as candidate. All I 'ave to do is give Churchill the information he wants. He wants to know members of the Communist party…I can 'ave their names in days."
"And how can you do that?"
"Jessie Eden," Tommy said to her. "She thinks that I am on 'er side."
Elizabeth frowned. "So you want to use her? What do you think will happen when she finds out? I doubt she will be happy, Tommy. In fact, I think she will be furious."
"Nah," Tommy said with a shake of his head. "I can play both sides."
"And play a dangerous game?" Elizabeth checked with him. "Tommy, can you not simply run for MP without getting involve in this? I know you mentioned it before, but I wondered if you were serious. Apparently you are."
"Aye," Tommy said. "And I could never get endorsin' without this information. I can do it, Liz, I just need to know that yer will be there with me."
Elizabeth chuckled. "When have I not been with you?" she asked from him. "We have had arguments and disagreements, but I promised you that I would always stand by your side. That isn't going to change. I just think that you should be careful how you play this."
Tommy nodded. "Aye, I will be," he promised her. "But if I do this…if I become an MP…I'll make 'er proud, Liz. Charlotte will be proud of me."
Elizabeth smiled sadly and moved to kiss him on the cheek. "She would be proud whatever happened."
….
Charlotte had been apprehensive around Tommy for a few days, but he had done everything in his power to show her that he was sorry. He had spent time reading her stories, walking with her and playing with her in the garden. He had told her that he had been ill and that was why he had acted how he had done. He had apologised and Charlotte had said that it was fine.
Elizabeth had mainly been helping Pol with the accounts as Tommy conducted his own business. She would meet her at the shop in Small Heath to help, often doing the accounts for her while she dealt with other business. Tommy was still determined to become an MP and Elizabeth had listened as he told her that he intended to go and meet with a member of the Labour party in Westminster the following week.
But before then, Tommy had vowed to spend time with his wife. That was why he had asked Pol to look after Charlotte one night. Tommy had dragged Elizabeth away from work early, taking her to some fancy restaurant. Elizabeth had held onto his arm as they walked among the rows of tables, a man playing a soothing melody on the piano that echoed through the room. Elizabeth could feel eyes on her and Tommy as they were led to a secluded table at the back of the restaurant.
Tommy brushed the waiter away, insisting on pulling out his wife's chair for her. She almost laughed as the waiter looked lost. Sitting down, Elizabeth placed the napkin in her lap as Tommy ordered a whiskey and a water for the two of them, knowing his wife didn't indulge in alcohol.
"What are we doing here?" Elizabeth enquired, pulling at the sleeves of the green dress she wore as she tucked her long hair behind her ear.
Tommy shrugged. "Thought it'd be nice for us to spend time together," he commented.
"And it is," Elizabeth said, "but I would have been content spending time together anywhere. You didn't need an expensive restaurant."
"I don't treat yer enough," Tommy commented.
"I don't need to be treated, Tommy," Elizabeth said with a soft smile.
"Yeah, yer do," Tommy responded. "Anyway, we 'aven't spent enough time together. We 'ave the 'ouse to ourself too."
Elizabeth felt her cheeks redden at that suggestion, smirking as the waiter placed a glass of water in front of her. She picked it up and took a sip before ordering the soup to start with and the chicken for the main. Tommy ordered the same before leaning across the table, his hand going to hold onto his wife's as she let it sit on the table.
"Yer know we don't talk about the past that much," Tommy said to his wife. "I know that a lot 'as 'appened and yer don't like talkin' about everythin'."
Elizabeth looked intrigued as she folded one leg over the other, her thumb moving over his knuckles. "What has brought this on?" Elizabeth wondered from her husband.
"Because I was just thinkin' about when we got married," Tommy admitted to her. "We've been married a long time now, Liz, and I never gave yer the grand weddin'. We got married in secret. I regret that."
"Really?" Elizabeth wondered from her husband.
"Yeah," Tommy nodded. "I wish that I 'ad given yer more. I wish that I 'ad given yer the big weddin'."
"I don't," Elizabeth shook her head. "Tommy, when we got married your family could hardly stand me. They thought that I was trouble and dangerous. At the time…just us two…no one else…it felt right. It felt like how it should have."
"Really?" Tommy asked.
"Of course," Elizabeth said. "I know that things have changed. Your family don't hate me now and we have a daughter. Things have changed and we might do things differently now, but at the time I only wanted you. I only ever wanted you and I got you back. That was enough for me. Living with you in a flat in London would have always been enough."
"I know," Tommy promised her. "But I want to give yer more, Elizabeth. I always wanted to give yer more."
"You don't have to," Elizabeth said to him. "I have more than enough."
Tommy heard the string quartet pick up and some people moved from their tables once they had finished eating, heading towards the small dance floor in the corner. Elizabeth watched them go. Tommy followed her gaze and moved to his feet. Holding his hand out to his wife as he stood up, she smiled as she looked up to him.
"Tommy, we should wait for our food."
"They'll tell us when it's 'ere," Tommy responded to her in a soft whisper. "Come on."
Moving to her feet, Elizabeth let Tommy guide her to the floor. Moving his hand into the air, he kept hold of hers as his arm secured around her waist and her free hand took hold of his shoulder. He moved slowly around, turning them steadily in time with the music.
Elizabeth gripped his shoulder tightly, her cheek just beneath his as her hair tickled his skin. Looking down to his wife, Tommy wondered where the years had gone. What had happened to those two young adults who had run off to London? When did they change into parents and people with responsibilities? He had no idea, but he wouldn't change anything. It had brought him to where he was now.
….
A/N: Do let me know what you think!
