Initially, Sasuke camps out in the desert for a few nights, just keeping an eye on the place, like Naruto directed him to. He spends his time reading the latest book Gaara lent him, and looking out for anything unusual.
(He distantly wonders when he became a messenger for the Hokage, and when this became Naruto directing him instead of the partnership the blond said he wanted at the valley, but he shakes the thought from his head. Maybe this was always what Naruto meant.)
He wakes early in the mornings, often rising before the sun - waking from his usual nightmares and restlessness - before he eats the food he has packed away and gathers his camping supplies. Then he walks the perimeter, eyes open for anything amiss and chakra searching for any other chakra signatures. Sometimes he senses small shreds of the chakra that Gaara reported, but he can never follow it for long before it scatters and disappears into the warm air, like mist.
The desert is windy and quiet - vast and seemingly never ending. Once he's out there, he can't imagine being anywhere else. The sand stretches on for as far as his eyes can see, a sea of tan and gold.
So, so quiet.
But on the fifth day - when he shakes sand from his camping supplies and prepares to canvas the area for anything unusual - he feels something nearby.
Sasuke pauses what he's doing and starts to slowly and quietly make his way toward the intrusion.
A disturbance. He pushes his hair out of his face and quickly gathers himself, focusing on a few grains of sand, his rinnegan spinning to life. Sasuke feels that familiar shift and he's closer to the whirling tornado of sand he's spied in the distance, swirling into the air.
Teleportation was one of his eyes more useful abilities, he'll admit.
He looks at the whirlwind, observing the patterns of the sandstorm.
It doesn't... look natural. It looks like someone is doing it consciously. The movement of the minerals looks too choreographed and...deliberate?
It looked like they were dancing. If such a thing were possible.
Sasuke moves closer, squinting as the grains start to sting his face the closer he gets. He raises his arm to shield his eyes, and he focuses a little further ahead yet again before quickly teleporting closer. The world shifts as he moves, and his eyes suddenly catch on a short, shadowy figure.
Sasuke takes a few careful steps forward, hand moving from his face to reach for his sword on his back, slowly. His fingers clasp around the handle of the blade, and he tenses slightly, ready to draw his weapon at the slightest provocation. He takes a few more careful steps towards the center of the sandstorm, the sound of his boots crunching along the desert floor completely overpowered by the sound of the wind whipping about.
A figure slowly comes into view. A pale hand, a lock of red hair.
Ah.
Of course.
Sasuke supposes he shouldn't be surprised.
He sees Gaara in the center, holding that same little boy. He's a bright, red spot in the sea of tan, catching Sasuke's eye easily. Shinki clings to the Kazekage, and the boy waves his hands into the air, trying to catch the grains of sand that float about. Gaara smiles at him warmly, pointing to what Sasuke can now see are swirling shapes floating in the center of the whirlwind.
Sasuke doesn't know why, but he just freezes and watches them for a long moment. Eyes glued to them and completely at a loss for what to do. A part of him urges him to turn and walk away, act like he never saw anything and push the image from his head - and usually he definitely would simply because this was none of his business and had nothing to do with him, but for some reason he can't move. He just stares.
Sasuke expected an enemy, maybe a wanderer - not Gaara entertaining this little boy.
"See that one?" Gaara asks gently, pointing to a small but animated fish he's created from the sand in the wind.
The boy smiles, trying to grab the swirling creation that swims around his fingers, narrowly avoiding the child's hand. Gaara makes the fish collapse out of shape and turn into a dolphin, cleverly dodging Shinki's clumsy attempts to grasp it.
Gaara watches him, quietly amused.
"Father, a starfish? Please? Like in my book?" He asks, looking up at Gaara. Gaara scraps the dolphin and crafts a starfish that bobs about and floats around Shinki's head. The child laughs quietly.
Sasuke looks at the little boy. So that's who he was.
Gaara had a son.
He knew the man was an omega, but he'd never heard anything about Gaara having a child. Nothing at all, in fact.
And with who? Did Naruto know? Why didn't he say anything? Why didn't anyone say anything? The omega didn't smell like he was bonded, and there were no signs of a mating bite at all.
And more than that, Sasuke doesn't know why he's so curious. He usually wouldn't care, but something about the fact that he doesn't know bothers him. He wants to ask, and it's like every time he sees the Kazekage he just ended up with more fucking questions.
He guesses he wants to know more, though he isn't sure why. And he isn't quite sure why it bothers him that he doesn't.
Sasuke hasn't thought this hard about his own emotions for a while. He hasn't been so confused by them in a while either. Sasuke knew misery and detachment, it was familiar, but this was a new feeling he had to think over, examine and inspect.
And he still didn't know what to make of how he felt, looking at the Kazekage. Confusion? Curiosity? Maybe.
"Sasuke." Gaara says, and he's pulled from his thoughts and faced with the redhead blinking up at him. The little boy tilts his head, looking on curiously.
Sasuke thinks maybe he's seen Gaara do that a few times before. Picking up his father's habits, most likely. Sarada had a few of Sasuke's mannerisms too, even if he hardly saw her.
The sandstorm had settled while Sasuke was absorbed in his own thoughts, and Gaara had apparently seen and acknowledged his presence while the Uchiha wasn't paying attention.
"Gaara."
Green eyes blink at him again.
"Taking a walk?"
He observes the sand as it settles.
"I was given orders."
"To watch the desert, I assume." He says, narrowing his eyes, "Are you out here alone?"
Sasuke doesn't know what to say to that. He could say yes, and it would be the truth, but he doesn't think that's what Gaara's asking.
It's a loaded question. It's obvious by the look in the man's eyes.
Gaara just blinks at his silence before adjusting Shinki and turning around, walking away.
"Well, dinner is in an hour, so we should be going." He says, and Sasuke watches him go and ponders how strange and incredibly abrupt the man is. The sand crunches beneath his boots, and Sasuke is about to turn and head back to his own camp until he hears Gaara address him again.
"You should hurry before we leave you behind." The Kazekage calls, "It's very easy to lose me in the desert if you fall behind."
Gaara keeps walking, and Sasuke turns to stare after him again. Then he takes a step, and another, and suddenly he's walking at Gaara's side, blinking down at the little boy in the man's arms who eyes him curiously.
He doesn't know why he follows the Kazekage again, but in his defense, lately Gaara and his village have been one of the more...agreeable things in Sasuke's life. He guesses.
Though it feels strange to acknowledge it, and he doesn't really know what to make of it or what that really even means.
"Have you been out here long?" Gaara asks, pulling him from his thoughts.
Gaara's looking forward, eyes on the desert and expression distantly troubled. Though Sasuke doesn't know why Gaara would care. What would it matter to him? To anyone?
"A few days."
Gaara's expression grows slightly darker in a subtle way, like he's angry and doesn't want to show it, "And Naruto ordered you to do this."
It's not a question. Sasuke doesn't need to answer.
"Who're you?" Shinki pipes up suddenly.
Sasuke looks at the child, unsure what to say for a moment. He wasn't really expecting that question.
"I'm...just someone who's known your father for a long time." He says haltingly.
The little boy looks at him for a long moment, but seems to accept that answer.
"Okay." He says after a moment, "I'm Shinki."
"Sasuke. Hello." Sasuke says. He can't help being a bit amused by the boy. Sarada often got that reaction from him too. Not quite a smile, but close. He actually wasn't completely terrible with children, like people might think.
He misses his daughter, in that moment.
"You're lucky, he's usually not so talkative around people he doesn't know." Gaara says after a moment.
Shinki busies himself with the button on Gaara's coat, fiddling with them, effectively distracted.
"Hn. Really."
"Really."
Sasuke is about to say something (though he doesn't know what, exactly) but then he notices they're at the entrance to the village and he'd barely noticed they were approaching. The guards materialize yet again, following their Kage as soon as he enters through the village gates.
Sasuke is flanked as well as a result, but not watched. They barely spare him a glance. The people of the village greet the Kazekage and his son as he passes, cheering their praises and adoration. Sasuke watches Gaara quietly greet and thank his villagers as he passes while Shinki shyly hides his face in his dad's jacket, obviously unsure of what to do with affection from so many strangers thrown his way. Sasuke avoids what eye contact he can, and instead keeps his eyes on the buildings they pass, trying to keep himself out of any limelight despite being walking with the Kazekage. It works, and he's thankfully ignored. A few villagers give him a curious glance, but he doesn't have to speak to anyone, and he's grateful.
The village seems even more green than the last time he visited, the sanded buildings covered in even more vines and flowers.
They walk in silence, and Gaara doesn't force conversation. It's quiet, but comfortable.
Gaara leads him into the mansion and Sasuke notes how the ANBU bow to the Kazekage and then quickly scatter, watching from the rooftops surrounding the Kazekage residence. Only one escorts the redhead inside and then bows low before disappearing out the window, content that their Kazekage is safe for the night.
They kept such a close eye on him. Sasuke didn't envy that sort of attention. Having eyes on him made him more and more uncomfortable as the years went on. During the academy, everyone was always staring at him, and after his clan's massacre he shrunk under their gazes and wanted nothing more than to hide from all prying eyes. Sasuke hated it. Hell, even Naruto got a bit uncomfortable when people stared at him, even as Hokage. But Gaara acted like he barely felt anyone's eyes on him at all.
It's not like he can ponder that long though, because he's suddenly distracted by the fact that he's in Gaara's home for some reason, and he isn't completely sure why he followed the man and agreed to come with him in the first place, but he's here and he finds himself even more curious about the man before him, even if he wouldn't say so out loud.
Gaara's preference for plant life was obvious, judging by the amount of greenery in pretty much every room. The residential section of the mansion was in the west wing, away from their offices but close enough to the medical wing in case of emergency, and he finds himself standing in the middle of Gaara's living room.
The offices felt completely different from where Gaara and his son stayed. Sasuke assumed that was the point.
The living room was littered with toys that Sasuke assumed to be Shinki's - stuffed animals and coloring books tossed about - looking very much like a small child went through it all that afternoon. Plants were on the windowsills, in various colorful pots. Some were in crystal clear orbs that hung from the ceiling. More bookcases lined the wall. A kotatsu table was in the middle of the room.
Sasuke takes off his cape, holding it over his arm and trying not to fidget. He's unsure how to react. People don't usually just invite Sasuke into their home. Sasuke didn't usually go .
"Any allergies or dietary preferences?" Gaara asks simply, putting Shinki down and telling him to tidy up his toys on the floor before dinner. The little boy flies towards the stuffed animals first, scooping them up and putting them back in the toy chest.
Sasuke shakes his head silently, fidgeting where he stands.
Gaara nods and heads into the adjoining room. Sasuke follows, unsure what else to do.
The kitchen is like any other, and Sasuke distantly wonders if every Kazekage before him lived in a normal apartment in the mansion like Gaara did. He doubts it. This space seemed exclusive to the redhead, who silently flips on the stove and sets a pot on it, reheating it.
Shinki wanders in, blinks up at Sasuke and then asks, "Help?"
The Uchiha nods, relieved that he has something to do with his hand. He sets his cape on a chair and takes the plates the boy hands him.
"They go there." Shinki says, pointing to the table. Sasuke nods and places them there, trying not to stare at either Gaara or his son.
Sasuke doesn't know how he even got here, really. They haven't seen each other in years and now - after only a few conversations and shared books over a handful of weeks - Sasuke is having dinner with them.
And while Sasuke feels an interesting blend of dull shock and awkwardness that he tries to hide, Gaara just acts as he usually does. Like nothing was out of place at all. Like Sasuke isn't just sitting at his dinner table, when this is the last place anyone would think he would be. Having dinner with the Kazekage and his kid.
Gaara just seats Shinki in his chair and gives him his chopsticks (small, colorful and clearly for children) before putting food on the plate in front of Sasuke as well.
Gaara doesn't eat anything, he just pours himself a cup of tea and sits next to Shinki, getting to work cutting the child's food into smaller pieces.
"Better?" He asks. Shinki nods and happily starts to eat, chattering to his father about something Sasuke has no idea about.
Sasuke looks down at his own plate. Right. He should eat too. He still feels somewhat out of place, but Gaara's casual air settles him, he guesses. He feels the tension leak from his shoulders, even if it's just a bit.
Gaara asks Sasuke no questions, and he doesn't force Sasuke to speak. It's like he knows the man wouldn't be up for it. And that was fine. Sasuke's thankful for that. He feels like he's always being forced to do something he doesn't want to lately, and it's exhausting. It's been exhausting for years.
Hell, Gaara hardly seemed like he expected anything from Sasuke.
Sasuke relaxes a bit more, picking up his own chopsticks.
He usually ate alone these days, and he'd grown accustomed to it. It occurs to him, as he hears Gaara and Shinki make conversation, that this is the first meal in about a year that he's had with others. Maybe longer. He isn't sure.
Sasuke has almost forgotten what it was like. To sit down and share food and company with others, hear them talk and feel their presence.
"I should get back to my...mission." he says once the dishes are cleared, wondering why he feels oddly reluctant to leave, "But, hn. Thank you."
Gaara nods, looking up at him from where he kneels to wipe Shinki's mouth with a napkin, "Of course. Though it is still...strange to me that Naruto would have you in the desert by yourself."
Sasuke barely holds back a bitter and sudden 'well he thinks I'm a wind-up toy who is meant to be sent wherever he pleases, apparently' and instead he just looks away, unsure how to respond. What could he say to that?
Of course Gaara wouldn't know what Sasuke's position is. He likely didn't know that Sasuke was mostly the Hokage's war dog. Technically, no one was supposed to know. Sasuke is technically supposed to keep a low profile wherever he goes so no one finds out he's Konoha's secret weapon.
"Lord Hokage has a reason." He says, and the words taste bitter on his tongue.
"Of course, but…" Gaara frowns, a break in his usually stoic expression, "You really shouldn't be out there. It drops below freezing at night and the sandstorms…"
"It's fine." Sasuke says, "I can...handle it."
Gaara gives him a slightly troubled look before he looks away. Shinki is handed off to an attendant who arrives to put the child to bed, and Gaara leads him to the village entrance. The ANBU jump to attention again. The night is slightly chilly, and Sasuke knows that by the time the sun goes down completely the desert will go still and cold, like it has every night since he's been there.
"If you're sure, I won't say anything more about it.." He says, "Though there are always inns and places for you in the village, if you ever get tired of dealing with the elements."
Something about that suggestion makes a part of Sasuke's chest get tight, like he can't breathe. The Uchiha finds himself annoyed with himself and all these new reactions he's having lately. How annoying.
He nods, and he realizes they're already at the entrance and the ANBU nin are flanking them yet again.
Sasuke cracks and finally asks.
"How do you deal with being watched every minute?" Sasuke asks, eyeing the ANBU who tail Gaara, keeping their usual close eye on the Kazekage.
Green eyes look at him for a moment, thoughtful. Sasuke tries not to stare again.
Sasuke realized, a few weeks ago, that Gaara didn't actually have any pupils. Something was always very different about his eyes, but Sasuke wasn't really trying to look all that closely when they were kids, then teenagers, usually trying to beat the shit out of each other.
Anyway, Gaara's eyes made it look like he wasn't looking at anything in particular, which made him appear almost spacey and not all there.
It was never the truth, though. Gaara's eyes were always right on their target, focused. Sasuke doesn't know when exactly he started noticing this stuff, and he doesn't know why he does, but it catches his attention.
The man is strange, he guesses. It's not a negative, Sasuke just can't help but notice. He doesn't know why that is.
"It's not hard to lose them." He says simply, and he starts to lose color in front of Sasuke's eyes as he crumbles into sand and begins to scatter and blow away in the wind.
Sasuke covers his face with the crook of his arm on instinct, though Gaara obviously expertly controls every grain to avoid touching Sasuke as he drifts away.
The ANBU immediately jump to attention, their masks somehow portraying their alarm and panic at their leader's sudden disappearance.
Sasuke watches Gaara disappear and he sees the ANBU scatter, clearly trying to locate Gaara's whereabouts.
Well, Sasuke guessed that was it, then.
He turns and exits the village, shaking his head. Of course.
Sasuke eats his next meal alone in the desert the next morning. He tries to ignore how empty it feels in comparison to the last one.
It's best not to think about it.
