Tony finished off the sickeningly sweet coffee that only seemed sweeter after seeing the damage that had been done to the man before him. This time he thought about what he was going to say. But even as he started he wasn't sure if his words would be quite right. "Ya, I got to fix myself. Physically. Still working on the mental parts though. And I nearly died because this-" He tapped the arc reactor. "-is completely new tech. Something that had been trashed before developments could even take place for a large scale version. Before I had this I got the fucking wonderful experience of lugging a car battery around with me if I wanted to live. Oh, and when I got back from the cave and finally got off the car battery onto something a bit more my speed every model I made would kill me if given enough time. For months before I found the right elements and variants I thought I would have to choose my preferred way to die. Shrapnel. Poisoning. Alcohol poisoning. Shrapnel. The arc reactor only exists and works because I stumbled on a concept my father left for me."

He shrugged and after drinking the final sip of his coffee Tony continued, "At least when you look in the mirror you can cover up what happened. You get to pretend nothing happened. Get to go to some random coffee shop and act normal. Don't have a glowing reminder that you should have died, could have died. Hell, you seem to be functioning better then me. Which is totally unfair-"

Loki gripped his coffee mug in a tighter and tighter grip till his knuckles turned bone white. He let go before the handle or Valhalla forbid the entire mug shattered. Placed the mug away from him on the counter and interrupted Tony. "I don't get to pretend nothing happened to me. This illusion functions in doing only two things. One, it doesn't scare my customers right out the door. It makes me approachable so I can make enough money to get by and live." He breathed in and out. He needed to stop slipping in his control. "Two, it helps me to stay sane. You see, an illusion can not block the pain. The pain is still there. The only things that are not there are the markings. Because if I had to see them every day, every second, I would relieve the actions that brought me here. This illusion is the only thing that makes me forget that my fath- that Odin Alfather burned me alive. Helps me forget, for mere seconds, that the only reason I'm alive is because Frigga begged for it to be so." He leaned on the counter and let out a breath he wasn't even sure if he had been holding in, "Maybe I am pretending. But I'm not pretending nothing happened. I'm pretending it happened differently. That maybe I'm still worthy of some form of love. At the very least I'm worthy of taking my next breath. Anthony, if anyone is meant to be dead it is me. I would gladly have died for what I did to this realm. Died trying to protect Thor and his mortal love. I could die right now if I willed it. But Frigga is dead. And the last thing she did for me was make sure I would live. So how could I possibly go against her wishes now?"

He went back to Tony and took the empty mug from him. He placed both Tony's and his own mug in the sink and washed them clean. As if it was the most important thing in all the realms. And yet for all that time neither of them spoke a single word. Loki and Tony thought over what they had said. What the other had said.

Finally Loki turned back to Tony, "If you think an illusion would help you cope I'm sure I could craft one for you."

And as Loki said what he had to say, Tony also decided he had something to say as well. "Are my bracelets actually stoping you from healing yourself?"

Loki ran a wet hand through his hair to push it back off his face. He hadn't even realized that it had been obstructing his view. "Healing spells in of themselves are not all that difficult. However for a working of this scale and depth..." His words slipped into nothingness as he shook his head. "It matters not. None of it really does." Loki placed the mugs on a rack so they would be able to dry. He turned back to Tony, "Now if you have no objections I would ask you to leave. I would like to finish closing up shop for the night. Maybe I'll even get some sleep, though after all this that would be unlikely." He waved at the door as if that would move Tony out of his shop faster. Loki needed him out so he could stop talking. So he would be free to morn and react and gain control once again. He hadn't meant to say all that he had. It just sort of tumbled out into the open. He wasn't sure if he wanted to take all the words back. All he was sure about was his need to be alone in his shop.

"I'll be going. See you soon." Tony slowly got out of his chair and made his way to the door. Soon enough he was gone.

Once he was gone Loki let himself fall to the floor. And he let the tears flow as he took off the illusion for the second time that day.