-o- CHAPTER SIX-o-


membership card


If I had been nervous at any point just a few short weeks prior that I was in desperate need of learning to kiss and learning to fight, that single day in Radiant Garden gave me an ample education in both. I spent a healthy portion of my afternoon cuddling and making out with Sora on the precipice, and the next several hours of our evening sparring with Riku. Both of these activities were profoundly disparate but equally euphoric. Both made me reconsider my body and myself, in two wildly different ways. My body could be used to kill. It could also be used to love.

After dinner, I made an effort to get away from all the others and find some relief from all my thoughts. I found a small courtyard garden and spent an hour on my yoga practice, alone beside the gentle water of a koi pond. The tension in my exhausted muscles eased, the butterflies in my stomach cleared away, and slowly I drifted into the intense and all-consuming focus of yoga. In that brief serenity that came just as I ended my final pose, I had the fleeting sensation that maybe, just maybe, I could handle what lay ahead.

My serenity was shattered when I heard footsteps coming toward me. I sat up, snapping immediately out of my calm, deep breathing state and into that frantic uneasy feeling that had been so familiar lately. When I glanced at the courtyard gate, I saw Leon enter and walk towards me.

"It's typically considered disrespectful to disturb someone during their practice," I told him with a heavy sigh. I reached for the towel beside me and dipped it into the cool pond water.

"I'm sorry," Leon said quietly. "I thought you were finished."

"No worries." His eyes looked so genuinely unsettled that I felt bad for snapping at him. It wasn't his fault that I was so tense, and needed my few moments of peace so desperately, after all. I took the wet towel and brought it to my flushed face. "You weren't wrong. I am finished. I was just hoping to make that yoga buzz last as long as possible. Before I start worrying again."

Leon dropped comfortably to his knees and sat down beside me in the grass. "Worry?" he probed. "Worry about what?"

I tried to crack a smile. "Oh, you know… everything."

Leon nodded. "I guess there might be a thing or two worth worrying about these days. It can't be easy being a teenager on top of it all. You know, I was about your age when things first started falling apart here in Radiant Garden. Life was so perfect when I was a kid, and then as I got older… the city turned into a nightmare. Ansem… well, Xehanort, I suppose, took over. The citizens fought amongst themselves. We were all uprooted from our homes. We left this place as children, but we came back as very different people."

I frowned and nodded. I realized that these terrible memories of his must have been my memories, too, buried somewhere deep.

"I know that I was here when all of that was happening," I said to him, confiding an agony I hadn't really shared with anyone before. "But I… I can't remember any of it. I don't remember anything but Destiny Islands. Is that weird, that I don't remember? I was seven when I was found on the Islands. Shouldn't I remember something before seven? Sora and Riku remember all kinds of things from when they were little but I…" The breaks in my speech and the blanks in my mind were so frustrating. There was something missing in me. "I can't remember it. I just can't."

"You probably never wanted to remember it, Kairi, to be perfectly honest. You were born into the chaos of Xehanort's slow takeover. It was a terrible time. God knows we all block a lot of it out, whenever we can."

I could only shrug. "Well I think I might like to remember, if I could. Just to know… I don't know. To know who I am. Or where I came from, at least."

Leon nodded. He reached out and touched my shoulder, which startled me a little. "I know that we don't know each other well, Kairi, but all of us think of you very fondly. You're part of our home, and our people. I don't know if anyone ever explained this to you, but Ansem the Wise- the real Ansem- he was your uncle. His brother, your father, lived here in this castle with you once upon a time." He sighed, as if he was hesitating over the next words he was about to spill. There was a soothing resonance to Leon's voice. Like a big brother. Or at least what I imagined a big brother to sound like.

"I know this probably isn't the time to talk about it," he began cautiously. I leaned in closer as my curiosity grew. "But a lot of things are about to unfold, and we'll soon be so caught up in our mission that this might be the only time I can speak to you alone. I want you to know that Radiant Garden is always your home, and you'll always be welcome here. And if you wanted to be part of the Restoration Committee… we'd be honored to have you."

I bit my lip. I wasn't really sure where he was going with this offer. Big deal: join the Restoration Committee. Sora was a member, of course. I guessed this was some kind of publicity nod. Again I tried to force a smile.

"Oh, well, that's very nice of you," I said, shrugging awkwardly. "I mean, I don't know what good I could do, but I'm glad you guys thought of me."

Leon looked away, distracted by other thoughts. "Of course it doesn't mean much now, since we'll all be taking a little hiatus from our current obligations to help the king. But I'd like it if you kept it in the back of your mind. I'd like you to… consider your options. Consider what you might like to do with your future, when the war is over."

"My… future?" Suddenly, this seemed a lot bigger than a membership card.

Leon met my eyes pointedly. "You are the rightful heir to the throne, Kairi. The Committee is acting as an interim government, but when these darker days have passed, we'd like to see the monarchy restored. We'd like to see you bring the rightful leadership back to Radiant Garden."

My brain went numb for a second. All I could hear between my ears was a dull rumble of panic and something that sounded a bit like, Holy. Shit.

"You want me to be… the leader? You want me to be a princess?"

Leon smirked a little. "Well, you already are a princess. And in the proper time frame, you could be queen."

"You want me to be queen? Um, wow. Okay. Yoga buzz is totally gone now. I think I'm going to throw up…"

I bent forward and pressed my hand to my face, actually struggling to catch my breath. I hoped to god I wouldn't faint, as I didn't think I could stand to feel any more embarrassed by that moment. I mean, queen? QUEEN? He had to be joking. I had only just turned sixteen. Sure, I could handle dance team captain or class president, but leader of an entire world? Freaking Queen Kairi?

I was getting dizzy. I was definitely going to faint. I looked up and tried to pick a visual to focus on, something to give me a sense of balance. Directly in front of me there was an enormous stone statue. It was some kind of winged monster, leering in a crouching pose. I focused on its stony face and took deep, metered breaths. One. Two…

On three, I screamed. Because on three, the giant statue in front of me exploded, spraying dust and rubble in every direction. On four, the dust had settled, and by five, a living, breathing monster stood where the statue had been, glaring at me with its burning yellow eyes.

It took mere seconds for Sora and Riku to come barging into the courtyard from the western gate, Keyblades waving wildly in the air, and in the next instant the eastern gate swung open as well. Yuffie cartwheeled inside excitedly with Aerith jogging close behind. I realized, staring up at the giant creature that towered over me as he roared and stretched out his enormous wings, that I was in fact still screaming.

"Whoa, whoa, everybody calm down!" Leon commanded, throwing himself in between the monster and the quartet of warriors charging forward. I clamped my hand over my mouth to shut myself up. Leon chuckled a bit as everyone skidded to a halt. Gracefully, he gestured to the beast standing behind him. "Guys, I'd like you to meet Goliath. He's our guest. And our teammate. Goliath, these trigger-happy kids are part of Mickey's crew."

The stoic beast bowed politely. "An honor to meet you all," he said, gazing at each of us humbly.

Slowly, everyone put away their weapons, looking a little sheepish.

"Sorry about the, uh, welcome wagon," Yuffie said with a giggle, scratching the back of her head. "We've been hurtin' for some action around here and we heard Kairi scream and… aaaaaaaaaanyway. I'm Yuffie, this is Aerith, that's Sora and Riku and, well, obviously you've met Kairi."

I blushed. "Um. Hi," I chirped. "Sorry for screaming."

Goliath smiled and stretched out his monstrous hand to me. I placed my hand in his stony, claw-ended fingers and he gingerly helped me to my feet. His violet reptilian wings, frightening when fully extended, rested comfortably on his shoulders like a cloak when retracted. It gave him a more distinguished appearance, which was welcome, given he wore nothing but a draping loin cloth. His flesh was an unnatural shade of purple, but the closer I looked into his face, framed by a main of black hair, the more human he looked to me.

"It isn't the first time my presence has raised an alarm," he explained. "My kind are notorious for being, shall we say, misread."

"So you're a gargoyle, right?" said Sora, observing him with interest. "Stone by day, living by night?"

Goliath nodded. "I'm sorry my awakening could not be a bit more discrete."

Sora grinned toothily. "Heh. Cool."

Riku eyed Goliath with a look of contemplation. That was always the way with those two, I noticed. Sora accepted everything openly and with enthusiasm, while Riku always reserved judgment and let his thoughts marinate silently for awhile. Riku was inclined to be cynical, of course.

"That must be a challenging existence," said Riku. His voice seemed more laced with sympathy than suspicion. "To be vulnerable during the day like that."

"It is indeed a weakness," Goliath answered confidently. "But I have found that true strength is gained through the trials inherent in overcoming your weaknesses. My clan has been through countless tragedies, but in suffering there is redemption. Rising to each challenge has only made us stronger."

A stunned silence weighed on us for a moment. It was sobering how easily this creature, so harsh in appearance, could emit such a string of elegant wisdom. Sora and Riku were on him in the very next minute, bombarding him with questions about gargoyles and his clan and his history. They were so absorbed in getting to know our fascinating new teammate that it was easy for me to fall out of the conversation and make my exit unnoticed. Intriguing though it was to meet my first gargoyle, I still needed more alone time.