~revised~
Chapter XL
Mira
she looked after the Doctor as he left the kitchen. Rose was still standing next to the door, as their eyes met. The girl was completely stunned, but slowly there was hate growing inside her, as well as embarrassment and disgust. She didn't have to see it in her eyes, it was washing over her like a wave.
"Rose, I-" But before she could finish the sentence, Rose was out of the door.
"Great," she murmured and buried her face in her hands. She really hadn't seen this coming. Well, just like the kiss. Maybe it had been wrong to leave the decision to Rose, but it just wasn't her style to let on things like that. At least Rose should be old enough to act a little bit more sensible. And, above all, a part of her was even glad that this was finally over. Maybe not so much glad about how it went – but things couldn't have kept going on like this for much longer.
She looked at her coffee, lifted the cup and took a sip. If there ever was a time for some damage control, than it was now. Or maybe, damage control was the wrong term. But she definitely had to talk to the Doctor. Rose couldn't stay here anyway, she herself and the Doctor knew it, although she still had doubts if any of the things to come could be changed now. For a short moment it came to her mind that probably this was exactly how it was supposed to happen. It felt almost as if foreboding did cast its dark shadow over her. Fine. Destiny would decide – or rather, already had decided - once more. All she could do now was to get herself and everyone else around her through the days or weeks to come as good as she was able to.
Eventually, she stood up and headed for the console room. The Doctor deserved an explanation at least.
…
She found the Doctor there, of course. Unfortunately, she had no idea if he held a grudge against her as well, but she certainly wouldn't apologise.
He had turned his back to her, doing something at the console. She had just leaned against the handrail as he said without turning around, "You know, sometimes I really don't understand you."
"Me neither," she said quietly, leaving it in the open if she meant understanding him or herself. "I just wanted her to be able to act rather than react. That's why I left the choice to her. But obviously it didn't quite turn out as I had wanted it."
He finally turned around to her, leaning against the console, arms crossed. "She can't stay. Not after everything that happened. Not with what's about to come," he said, as if to reassure himself.
For a long moment they looked at each other. In the dim light of the console room his eyes appeared almost black, plus, he occasionally had a habit of not blinking for an irritatingly long time. Just like now.
Suddenly, she felt the darkness rolling over her again. The dream had only been a hint, but now she definitely could feel that there was something coming. A storm. Not only a change, but something dark and final, an end. But to what? To whom?
"I don't think it'll change anything," she said eventually. "It has already started, you've felt it too."
"Well, there's always something that can be done. Well, most of the times at least. Besides, what's it with all the fatalism now?" he replied.
"What's wrong with fatalism?"
"You didn't sound like that on Kroptor."
"That was different. Besides, you of all people should be able to understand fatalism. What about fixed events? What if there sometimes really is no way to change what's about to happen?"
"Well, when I say fixed, then it's because things shouldn't be changed. They should happen. Should as in: Better not try to change them. I did said it can't be done."
"Have you ever tried it?" she asked and looked at him. Not for the first time she wondered how it must be to have a time machine, to see the past and the future and being able to change them. And she also wondered how mighty these Daleks must have been, being able to destroy his homeworld and kill everyone of his people but him. The thought almost made her shiver, and she hoped she would never run into them, ever. If they had survived at all. He had never told her. "You know what?", she continued as he didn't reply, "Actually, fatalism really isn't that bad. It reminds you that sometimes what happens is just out of your influence. That not everything is evolving around yourself and that you just have to try and figure out your role in the big picture. Like right now. Not wasting your energy on things that can't be changed, instead just try to see. Have you never been in a situation that, no matter how hard an how many different approaches you have tried, just didn't work out as it should have, despite all odds?"
He frowned at her. "That almost sounds as if you believe in fate."
"Maybe?" She smiled sadly. "But I personally would prefer to say 'trust', not 'believe'."
"So you think everything we do is irrelevant?" he said in disbelief.
"I didn't say that. And fatalism definitely has its time and place. But if I have the choice between trusting in fate or coincidence, I would always choose fate. The bigger picture, you know?"
He seemed as if he was about to answer as they both heard footsteps.
Doctor
Humans. Humans and their need to make sense out of everything. They just couldn't accept chaos and coincidence, they always had to make something out of it. Give everything a meaning. It really was a fascinating talent, but, unfortunately, they were wrong. If every now and then a red car was driving by the same time their phone was ringing, they would state that it had to mean something. They just always wanted to see connections where there were none. Of course, somehow the red car and the phone ringing was connected, because it was part of the same universe. It had all been the same energy in the beginning, at the big bang, but there was no deeper meaning to it. Somehow he had always blamed this behaviour on their incredible short life expectancy, and a little bit on their tiny little human brains as well. Maybe they just needed it to explain the universe, to not get lost in all its eternity.
All the more it was astonishing that Mira, after her almost sixteen-hundred years of existence, and with all her scientific background, was still able to trust in those things. He just wondered how much. After all she had been through, he would rather have expected her to be bitter than still being able to trust in fate.
He really would have liked to continue their conversation – he was definitely missing conversations like that – but Rose showed up. She was carrying a large, red rucksack and looking really miserable. He hadn't wanted it to end like that. But nevertheless, as much as he wanted to, he couldn't find it in himself to feel sorry for her. At least not as much as he probably should. They had had a really good time together. He had no idea what would have become of him if he had continued to travel alone. If he hadn't met her. At the same time he felt guilty. She had wanted something that he couldn't give her, and instead of being clear to her from the beginning, he had just remained silent. Had hoped that she would get the right idea on her own eventually.
But now it was over. Even if Mira was right and they couldn't do anything to prevent what was about to happen, he could at least give back her life to her. Give her the chance to find someone, another human, to spend her life with. She would forget about him some day, go on with her life and be happy. With him being nothing more than a distant – and hopefully fond – memory. Just like his other companions.
Most of them at least. Maybe not Sarah. But all the others who had decided to leave him, and broken his hearts every single time. Just like Rose now, but for different reasons. He was really deeply disappointed by her behaviour, even if he could understand it to an extend.
There was no need for words. Everything that could have said had been said, at least from his point of view. He had already programmed the coordinates, and now he put the TARDIS into flight mode. Even the TARDIS seemed to be sad, but he couldn't help it now.
As the engines stopped, he opened the door and looked at Rose. They had landed on a playground next to the Powell Estate.
"Would you," she started and cleared her throat, "Would you come... at least to the door. Just to say goodbye?" she said, and shortly looked over to Mira, then back to him.
"Rose, I-"
"Please."
He really didn't want to. He hated goodbyes, as well as the thought of bumping into Jackie right now. But... "Fine."
He would just walk with her to the door of her flat. Nothing more. He put on his cloak, and they walked in silence to the entrance and up. Rose unlocked the door, and as he was about to turn around, Jackie literally burst out.
"Oh, I don't know why you bother with that phone! You never use it!" she said and threw her arms around Rose, who hardly returned the hug. Jackie must have realised that, because she almost instantly pulled back and looked at her. "What's wrong sweetheart?"
"I... Nothing, just..."
"She's staying here with you now," he said quietly as Jackie gazed at him.
"What? Why? What happened? And where is... Oh, that skinny girl. What's her name?"
"Mira. She's waiting in the TARDIS," he replied.
Jackie looked from him to Rose and back. "Okay. What have you done to her? What happened?"
He scratched the back of his neck and said, "Nothing. I'll have to go," and was about to turn around.
"Oh no, you wait. Rose! What is it?"
"Mum! Please, it's just...," she said, and then turned to him. "Do you maybe... want a cup of tea?"
"Rose, I-"
"Oh that's a good idea!" Jackie yelled. "I've got a surprise for you! It'll cheer you up a bit. Guess who's coming to visit? You're just in time - he'll be here at ten past! Who do you think it is?"
"I don't know."
He used the moment to finally and slowly retreat.
"Oh go on, guess!"
"No, I hate guessing. Just tell me."
He had almost make it back to the lift by now.
"It's your granddad. Granddad Prentice. He's on his way. Any minute!"
"What? But... he passed away. His heart gave out. Do you remember that?"
"Course I do!"
What? He stopped for a moment to listen.
"Then how can he come back?"
"Why don't you ask him yourself? Oi, you stay!" She had finally noticed his disappearance. Well, he had planned on getting into the lift, but now... If a long dead granddad was about to return, he really should look into it, shouldn't he? He went back and Jackie waved him and Rose into the flat and closed the door behind them.
"Ten past. Here he comes," she said and went to the kitchen.
And then, right in front of his eyes, a figure appeared out of thin air in the middle of the kitchen. It was a scheme that resembled a humanoid shape, but apart from that, he couldn't really tell what or who it was.
"Here we are, then!" Jackie said. "Dad... say hello to Rose. Ain't she grown?"
She was obviously thinking it was the ghost of her long dead father. But how? To him it was more than clear that this wasn't a ghost. But what then? He instantly ran back into the staircase, down and out through a side door, Rose on his heals. They were everywhere.
"They're everywhere!" Rose pointed out the obvious. Suddenly, he was joined by Mira. She must have been outside the TARDIS when this had started.
"What are they?" he asked.
"Look out!" Rose yelled, and not a second later one of these figures passed right through him. It felt weird, but it definitely didn't harm him.
"They haven't got long. Midday shift only lasts a couple of minutes. They're about to fade," Jackie explained.
"What do you mean, shift? Since when did ghosts have shifts? Since when did shifts have ghosts? What's going on?" he wondered.
"What? They're ghosts? Really?" Mira asked and looked around in confusion.
"Oh, he's not happy when I know more than him, is he?" Jackie said to him.
"But no one's running or screaming or freaking out or-"
"Why should we?" Jackie asked and checked her watch. "Here we go. Twelve minutes past."
And, at that very second, the ghosts disappeared. They had definitely looked like ghosts, he gave them that. But he was sure they weren't. He had never seen an actual ghost, not once. There had always been another explanation.
He followed Jackie back to the flat and a few moments later he was sitting on the floor, in front of the television, Mira next to him, Jackie and Rose were sitting behind him on the sofa. There was a program called 'Ghostwatch'. It almost seemed as if the whole planet had gone mad.
"On today's Ghostwatch, claims that some of the ghosts are starting to talk, and there seems to be a regular formation gathering around Westminster Bridge," the presenter announced, followed by footage of ghosts on Westminster Bridge. "It's almost like a military display..."
"What the hell's going on?" the Doctor murmured, his brows furrowed.
"These aren't actual ghosts, are they?" he heard Mira say, making him turn his head to her for a moment. She didn't believe in this ghost-thing, did she? He used the remote to change to a weather report, but instead of weather symbols there were little pictures of ghosts on the map of the UK.
The weatherman announced, "And tonight we're expecting very strong ghosts. From London, through the North and up into Scotland."
He changed the channel again to a chat show.
"So basically, Eileen, what you're telling me is, that you are in love with a ghost," the woman in the show said.
"He's MY ghost and I love him, 24/7!" Eileen said.
He changed the channel once more, but there were ghosts everywhere. Not a single program without ghosts.
"They're obsessed," Mira said flatly.
"It's all over the world," he said after a while. He tried once more to find a channel without ghosts, but then he had enough and switched off the TV. "When did it start?" he asked.
"Well first of all, Peggy heard this noise in the cellar, so she goes down-"
"No, I mean worldwide."
"Oh! That was about two months ago. Just happened. Woke up one morning, and there they all were - ghosts, everywhere. We all ran round screaming and that, whole planet was panicking... no sign of you, thank you very much... then it sort of sank in. Took us time to realise that... we're lucky."
"What makes you think it's granddad?" Rose asked.
"Just feels like him. There's that smell, those old cigarettes. Can't you smell it?"
"I wish I could, mum, but I can't," Rose replied gently.
"You've got to make an effort. You've got to want it, sweetheart."
"The more you want it, the stronger it gets?" he asked.
"Sort of, yeah."
"Like a psychic link. Course you want your old dad to be alive, but you're wishing him into existence. The ghosts are using that to pull themselves in."
"You're spoiling it," Jackie said.
"I'm sorry, Jackie, but there's no smell, there's no cigarettes. Just a memory."
"But if they're not ghosts, what are they, then?" Rose asked.
"Yeah, but they're human! You can see them - they look human!" Jackie said.
"She's got a point. I mean, they're all sort of blurred, but they're definitely people," Rose fell in.
"Maybe not. They're pressing themselves into the surface of the world. But a footprint doesn't look like a boot," he said and stood up.
"What makes you so sure they aren't ghosts?" Mira asked quietly. She had stood up as well.
"You really believe in ghosts? Have you ever seen one?"
"No, not yet. But does that prove they're not existing?"
Rose
She was still shocked by the recent events. Her mind was still refusing to accept that she would stay behind on Earth now. All the more she hoped that now, with all the ghosts, she maybe would get another chance. At least he certainly wouldn't leave immediately. Not before he had solved whatever was going on.
"According to the paper, they've elected a ghost as MP for Leeds," she said to the Doctor, who was doing something underneath the TARDIS console. Mira was there as well, but she couldn't help that now. "Now don't tell me you're gonna sit back and do nothing." She watched as he popped up from underneath the console, wearing a rucksack and holding an odd looking device in his hands. It could have been a funny sight, but his face was all serious.
"I certainly will do something," he said, walked by her and went out of the door. She and Mira followed him, only to meet Jackie outside.
"When's the next shift?" he asked Jackie.
"Quarter to. But don't go causing trouble. What's that lot do?"
"Triangulates their point of origin."
"I don't suppose it's the Gelth?" Rose asked, remembering all to well how their last encounter with the Gelth went.
"Nah."
"Who are the Gelth?" Mira asked.
"A humanoid species who lost their bodies. They look like ghosts as well," he explained. "They were just coming through one little rift. This lot are transposing themselves over the whole planet. Like tracing paper."
"You're always doing this. Reducing it to science. Why can't it be real?" Jackie said, but the Doctor ignored her. "Just think of it, though... all the people we've lost - our families coming back home. Don't you think it's beautiful?" she continued.
He paused and looked at her for the first time. "I think it's horrific." Ignoring her shocked look, he turned to Mira. "Mira, give us a hand."
He started to unwind a cable, leading it into the TARDIS, Mira following him. Alright, he had obviously chosen to ignore her, Rose thought. Inside the TARIDS, he plugged the cable into the console. She also entered the TARDIS, followed by Jackie who closed the door.
"As soon as it becomes activated, if that line goes into the red, press that button there. If it doesn't stop...," the Doctor was talking to Mira and held the Sonic right under her nose. "Setting 15B, hold it against the port, eight seconds and stop."
"15B, eight seconds," she repeated.
"If it goes into the blue, activate the deep scan on the left."
"And how do I do that?"
"Didn't I show you?"
"No."
"Ah, it's that one," he said and pointed seemingly randomly at the console.
"That?"
"Nah, close."
"This one?"
"Yeah!" he said and smiled widely at her. Rose felt as if her heart was braking, it was so different to the serious face he had given her earlier on.
"Now, what've we got? Two minutes to go?" he continued, looking over to Jackie.
"Yeah, two minutes."
He went outside, whilst Mira stayed in the TARDIS. Rose followed him, her mother behind her – again.
"What's the line doing?" he shouted through the open doors at Mira.
"It's all right, it's holding!" she yelled back.
"So, tell me Rose, what's going on here?" her mum suddenly asked her quietly.
"Mum, I said, nothing..."
"It's about them, isn't it? They're together?" Jackie asked.
Rose looked at her, only to immediately lower her glance. She could feel tears in her eyes, and if there was one thing she wouldn't do right now, was starting to cry.
"I don't know," she said quietly.
"You had a fight?"
"Maybe... Yes. I think so."
"Oh Rose, sweetheart. I told you, a bloke is a bloke. Maybe it's for the best. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. You'll see! Don't you want children some day? Would that even be possible with him being an alien?"
"Mum, stop it!" she said and looked anxiously over to the Doctor. Hopefully he hadn't heard her, but he seemed to be busy with his devices.
"Mira, what's the scanner doing?" the Doctor yelled and interrupted their conversation.
"The scanner's working - it says "delta one six"," Mira yelled back.
Doctor
The Doctor was facing the centre of the triangle. Now he would finally get some answers. "Come on you beauty!" Right at this moment a ghost was materialising in the centre. Immediately, the cones were connected with rays of blue electricity, which in turn connected over the head of the ghost. He pulled out a pair of spectacles with one green and one red foil and focused on the ghost.
Almost there. He made some adjustments on his equipment, causing the ghost to shudder and groan.
"Don't like that much, do you?" he laughed. "Who are you? Where are you coming from? WHOA!" He suddenly got hit by an electric shock from the ghost, making him stumble backwards.
"That's more like it! Not so friendly now, are you?"
But of course, there was no response from the ghost. It just continued to shudder and jerk, until it finally disappeared. The Doctor immediately darted forward and began to gather his equipment. No he had to be quick, having the origin of the ghosts located. He hurried back to the TARDIS, not realising that not only Rose, but also Jackie was following him.
He threw his cloak over the railing inside the TARDIS, and yelled at Mira in excitement, "I said so! Those ghosts have been forced into existence for one specific point! And I can track down the source. Allons-Y!"
"Well then, off we go," she said and smiled back at him, almost as excited as he was feeling.
He pulled down a lever and the TARDIS engines came to life.
"I like that. 'Allons-y'. I should say 'allons-y' more often. 'Allons-y'. Watch out, Mira Rhodan! Allons-y! And then, it would be really brilliant if I met someone called Allonzo. Because then I could say, 'allons-y, Allonzo'! Every time! You're staring at me," he said, realising that Mira was looking at him with a strange expression on her face.
"Rose and Jackie are here," she said.
"So wha-" Oh hell. Yeah. That hadn't been his plan.
"If we end up on Mars, I'm gonna kill you," Jackie said.
And, right now, he totally believed her. "No, not Mars. Definitely not Mars," he hurried to say and pulled a lever. The TARDIS had materialised and now they all could see on the screen that they were in some sort of storage area, with a lot of soldiers bursting into the room and getting into their positions. "Oh, well there goes the advantage of surprise. Still! Cuts to the chase. Stay in here, look after Jackie," he said to Rose. He would certainly not take her with him when leaving the TARDIS.
"I'm not looking after my mum!" Rose insisted.
"Well, you brought her!"
"I was kidnapped!" Jackie said indignantly.
"Doctor, they've got guns," Rose said as she had pushed by him and was standing in front of the door now.
He shot a quick look to Mira, who made every effort to appear uninvolved.
"And I haven't. Which makes me the better person, don't you think?" he said to Rose, caught her around the waist and moved her smoothly out of the way. "They can shoot us dead, but the moral high-ground is ours," he said. Well, at least he hoped that Mira would accompany him. He opened the door and stepped through it, gladly realising that Mira was at his side.
Quasi-Stellar, Serendipity989, Jesse Wales, Ingridie, CrazyAnamarija, oXxgeorgiaxXo, 10th Squad 3rd Seat, bored411, Falling Right Side-Up, heroherondaletotherescue, Keeperofhounds and AxidentlGoddess: Thank you for leaving a review :-)
