Getting into my car, I take out my smartphone and call my brother Elliott to leave him a message.
Surprisingly, he picks up.
"Yes, Christian?" he answers.
"You're such a cad," I tell him.
"You're not going to teased me again about my adding that second 't' to the end of my first name, are you, dear brother?"
"More important than that, I'm afraid," I say. The subject is rather embarrassing, so I choose my words carefully. "I'm at your house, my good man, and you really should close the drapes to your front windows. As I was walking up the driveway, I saw you and your lovely bride Kate having wild, passionate sex on your living room couch."
I can hear my brother laughing.
"The jokes on you, dear brother," he tells me. "I'm not at home."
