My interview was over. I grit my teeth at the idea of my story -and my vulnerability to be shared with the world. This whole situation was overwhelming. My chest felt like a beating drum. An hour ago I was in the safety of the Cavidad Oscuro. For ten years, that tiny cell had been my home, my sanctuary. I'd been visited by a bird. Then my inner peace had been broken. Guards had come into my tiny cell, beaten me senseless and placed me in front of a journalist. Now, the rest of the world can hear the miserable story of my life and laugh. And now, I was going to be placed back into general population, to pick up my life where it left off when I was a child.
I felt the sharp blow of a guard's nightstick against my ribs as the marched me through the prison.
"Hurry up, you dumb animal!" He barked at me.
I shot him a look of hatred. I quickly recognized the source of his resentment. A large purple welt worn over his eye, a mark left by my fist after he invaded my cell and harassed me. He'd gotten his own back though. I reached up and touched the swollen skin over my own eye, a mirror image of his. The swelling had now sealed my eye shut completely, so I was half blind.
I couldn't see the guard whose teeth I had knocked out. He must have been taken off duty for medical care. I wasn't faring much better. The walk seemed to last forever, and it was difficult to keep pace with the guards. Their pace was brisk, and I hadn't walked anywhere for more than a decade now. My legs were also a mess after the vicious beating. Four against one. These cowards. My bare feet blistered as I marched down the stone hall, a sharp blow to my back or ribs would remind me to keep moving every time I lagged.
Eventually they led me into yet another administration office. Waiting for me was the fat warden, a smirk on his face.
"And how did you enjoy your interview?"
I said nothing.
"You are about to become quite famous. Does the thought not excite you?"
I stared at the round, arrogant man, still saying nothing. I was sure that any words of contempt would result in another beating, and contempt was all this man deserved.
"I am now going to return you to general population," he continued. "I expect you to behave. To follow the rules. Do you understand me? I swear, I will throw you back in that hole if you do not..."
I reluctantly gave him a nod.
"Very good." He turned toward an open door in the back of the room and shouted, "What is taking you so long, you idiot!"
"Apologies, sir," a familiar voice called back. "This inventory closet has been organised very poorly..."
I couldn't help but grin as I identified the voice.
"Hurry up!" the fat warden barked back. "We do not have all day! Find the boy's personal belongings and bring them here. Don't forget to bring him some clothes, too..." the warden cast a disproving eye at my child sized prison scrubs tied around my waist like a loincloth.
A few moments later, Zombie emerged from the inventory closet, returning my grin as he saw me. "My, you have grown..." The years had not been kind to Zombie. He was now completely bald, and skinnier than ever. I recognised his voice, but every word had a wheeze. Each syllable seemed to cost him great effort.
"Yes, I have grown."
"These should fit you." He dumped some new prison scrubs on the table in front of me. A guard stepped behind me and finally released me from my cuffs. I flexed my arms, they still ached from my beating and were still covered in bruises and welts. Zombie gasped as he saw my injuries. "My god... What happened to you?"
"The boy needed a lesson, is what happened to him!" the fat warden barked. He then gave a cruel smirk. "Don't forget to give the boy his personal affects."
Zombie shot me an apologetic look. "Of course." He then placed my childhood teddy bear on the table. Osioto.
The fat warden chuckled. "Make sure you do not forget to take this bear with you, boy! You may find that he will be your only friend!"
The other guards joined the warden in their cruel laughter.
I said nothing, and with a swift motion, I tossed my filthy loincloth to the floor and begun the change into my new prison scubs.
"Disgusting... one of the guards muttered as he looked away. The boy has no shame..."
Zombie laughed, a dry cackle. "Usually we afford you a bit of privacy to get dressed..."
"I do not care." I stated. "It has been years since I have had clothes that fit." I turned to the warden. "I am ready to return to general population now."
The fat warden stepped forward and gestured to Osioto on the table. "Don't forget to bring your friend."
I snorted. The resentment he felt towards me was clear. I had not died in the Cavidad Obscuro, so now he was returning me to general population. And he wanted to emasculate me by making me walk there holding my childhood teddy bear. "Thank you, but I am fine," I responded.
"I insist," he pointed at the bear again. "Take him with you."
"No." I stepped forward and balled my hand into a fist. I was already injured and exhausted. I don't know if I could survive another beating. But if I had to die here in this office, perhaps it would be a good death if I could wipe the smug smile from the warden's nasty face.
Zombie stepped toward me. "Take the bear."
I looked at him, feeling little betrayed that he would side with the warden in humiliating me.
He returned my gaze... his eyes pleading a little. "Please... I think you should take it. God knows it took me long enough to find back there," he pointed his thumb back to the inventory closet and gave me a wink.
I reached forward to pick up Osioto with one hand... and the head started to come loose.
"Careful..." Zombie cautioned me. "He's a bit fragile."
I reached for him again, this time with both hands, and I instantly understood why Zombie had wanted me to take my childhood teddy bear. Osioto was heavy. Much heavier than a small bear should be. I grinned again, and Zombie responded with a wink.
I was then marched through the winding hallway back to general population. I felt dizzy and nauseous as the narrow hallway opened up. I did not realise this at the time, but after ten years alone in a tiny cell, I was now suffering from agoraphobia -the fear of open spaces. As soon as I entered the large room of general population, I saw a dozens other faces, all hardened criminals. I'd never seen so many people crammed into one space before. Sweat broke out on my brow. Here I was, marched along by the guards, barely able to keep up due to my injuries. I was holding a teddy bear. I was exposed. I was a joke. For years, I thought I was building my strength, but now I felt weak. I braced myself for the familiar taunts and threats these men had hurled at me as a child. And yet none came. Instead was silence, only interrupted by my footsteps as the guards marched me through these men.
Finally, someone spoke. "The kid survived!" someone shouted. Someone else let out a sharp whistle, that was followed by another. Then a few men started clapping. Some started cheering. I was speechless. This... this was not the reception that I was expecting.
As punishment, the warden gave me another sharp blow to the ribs. "Hurry along..." he hissed at me. "I have chosen your new cell myself."
We passed through the crowd, up a few flights of stairs and the guards unlocked my new cell -my new home. I noticed that the bed was a bunk bed. I placed Osioto down on the lower bed.
"Pena Dura has become more crowded since you were locked away," the fat warden explained to me. "We have had to double up many of the cells. So you will be sharing. An old friend of Puerco's I believe. I'm sure you two will have much to talk about. The door slammed behind me as I sat on the bed.
I sat silently as the hours passed. I could hear the men outside would talking, laughing, fighting. Occasional barking orders from the guards. I was told that I could join the men if I wanted, that these few hours were my recreational time. I'd rather keep to my cell. For now, the outside world was too loud, too overwhelming. My whole body still ached from the vicious beating I'd endured in the Cavidad Obscuro, then the continuous beating I'd endured the whole way to my new cell, -punishment for lagging behind.
When the guards were ready to lock us down for the night, another man entered my cell. I refused to even look at him as he climbed up to the bunk above me. I could hear his steady breathing as he waited for the guards to lock us in and then leave the area. Finally he spoke to me.
"Hello, child."
I refused to respond.
He climbed down from the bunk and tore the blanket from me. He looked at Osioto and laughed. "This one is cute," he said as he pointed to Osioto.
I leapt to my feet and stared down my cellmate. He was fat like Puerco was, but taller. He looked like he had some muscle hiding under the fat. The top of his head had long since gone bald, but long, thick hair hung around the perimeter of his head. "What do you want?" I barked at him.
"I want to know my cellmate."
"I am Bane." I shot back at him.
He laughed. "Bane? That is very cute. Your bear is very cute. I think you are very cute." He stepped closer to me.
"Get away from me, you pervert," I snapped back at him. I am ashamed to say I felt fear in my voice.
"Puerco was my friend, child. You killed him. That means you owe me something." He stepped closer again. "Get on your knees, boy."
I shoved him. He shoved back. He was older, taller, more confident and perhaps a little stronger. He was certainly more brutal. He slammed my head against the stone wall. Perhaps I would have stood a better chance if I had not been recovering from a brutal beating earlier that day. This man saw my weakness and would now take advantage of it. He slammed a fist into my face. I swung back. I grabbed a handful of my hair and beat my face against the wall again and again. The room spun around me. I could no longer fight back. Not properly, anyway.
His fingers tightened around my throat from behind as I gasped for air. "You understand you are powerless," he whispered to me. "You understand that I own you." It wasn't a question. He twisted one arm behind my back as my other arm groped around desperate for a weapon. I grabbed Osioto and pulled him to me. The vile man chuckled. "I give you pain or I give you life. I am your world, child. Do you understand?" I felt his breath against my ear.
"I understand." I replied. With my free hand I twisted Osioto's head clean off to reveal the knife that was hidden beneath. I silently thanked Zombie for hiding the knife for me, for insisting that I take the bear with me. I slammed the knife into my cellmate's foot and he screamed as he released his grip. I pushed him back and lunged again with the knife. He slammed his fist into my jaw. I slammed the knife into his neck. He was taller, stronger and in better condition. I had a knife. My blows did more damage than his. By the end of it, I was hurt, but he was dead.
My second kill. My second human kill, anyway. I stood over his body and pondered what this meant. Would I be sent back the the Cavidad Obscuro, this time to die? Ten years I'd spent in that tiny cell. I survived, and perhaps now I would have to go back there. My whole body shook as I contemplated the injustice of this situation. I drew in a ragged breath as pain throbbed through me. My whole body was a giant bruise. Everything that had happened today was too much to bear. The guards. The beatings. The interview. This vile man and the punishment that was sure to follow. I felt the tears fill my eyes and I was powerless to hold them back. In that moment I hated myself.
I heard footsteps approach my cell. I didn't even bother to turn around. All this pain, all this trauma had finally worn me down. If the fat warden wanted to kill me now, I would not resist. I didn't have it in me any more.
I heard a click, and my cell door scraped open. I closed my eyes and waited for the rain of fists, of nightsticks. I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"Boy," a voice whispered.
I turned around sharply. It was not a guard. It was not the fat warden. It took me a few moments to recognise the man who had entered my cell. He was older now, but still strong, still ugly and still fierce. It was Trogg, the large man who had fought with Puerco on the day I had been knocked into a coma. Behind him was Zombie, standing guard at the door stoicly.
Trogg gestured to the corpse in my cell. "We will take care of this... vile pig." He pulled me to my feet, but I could barely stand. I took one step towards him before I collapsed again. Before I hit the floor, he caught me with a thick arm. He helped me to my feet and walked me out of the cell, past Zombie. Zombie and Trogg looked at each other, and Trogg gave Zombie a quick nod. Zombie picked up my cellmate by the feet and begun to drag him out of the cell.
"Come with us," Trogg said to me. "Come with us and be safe."
