When they reached Blaine's apartment, Kurt didn't feel like sex. Every question from the night swarmed inside his brain and despite Blaine's eagerness to get him into the bedroom, Kurt tugged on his boyfriend's wrist with a furrowed expression.
"What is it?" Blaine asked, confused. He snaked his arms around Kurt's hips and pulled him in for a kiss. Neither boys had spoken about the night just yet. They had been too busy laughing and racing each other home. Now, Kurt wanted to understand.
"You promised me some answers." Kurt pecked a soft kiss to his lips. He led Blaine to the black suede couch and nestled himself into Blaine's arms. Blaine breathed in Kurt's perfume and held him tighter, anticipating the first question.
"You knew it was going to be Sam tonight."
"That's not even a question." Blaine remarked, offended.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Kurt giggled at Blaine's reaction.
"I wanted it to be a surprise." Blaine pecked Kurt's cheek as he twisted around on Blaine's lap to see his expression. Blaine nestled down along the couch so Kurt could lie flat across his torso. "Besides, I figured you would be more comfortable with someone you knew."
"It was. Thankyou."
"And I see your eyes wandering. Don't tell me you didn't enjoy those abs." Kurt's flushed cheeks was enough of an affirmative answer for Blaine. He threw back his head with a chuckle and held Kurt tighter. He loved the feeling of Kurt's body on top of him, the weight, the heat, the way Kurt snuggled his face into Blaine's chest.
"I don't need to ask you to know you had a good time." Blaine stroked Kurt's hair, waiting for the next question.
"What did Danni mean by your father not being to happy about our stairwell shenanigans?" This was not the question Blaine was expecting. It caught him off guard.
"My father is part owner of the club. It's not something I like to mention. It was sort of a mid-life crisis purchase after he left my mother. I wouldn't want anything to do with him, but I wanted to live in the city and my father wanted to patch up our relationship. He was going to give me the apartment rent free, I said I didn't want that. I said I would get a job like everyone else. He said, 'How about you work for me'. It was a compromise. I don't see him very often anyway, so it works out in my favour."
"What about your Mum?"
"On a cruise ship now. We keep in touch, emails mostly because she travels so much. She isn't missing my father at all, so don't feel sorry for her."
"Have you told them about me?"
"Not yet?"
"Will you?"
"Would you like me to?"
"You are answering my question with another question Blaine Anderson, that's called avoidance."
"You have been reading my study books."
"I'm a good student."
"I would love to tell them. I'm just worried what they would say."
"Probably something along the lines of 'what a dashingly handsome boyfriend you have Blaine, don't you ever let him out of your sight.'" Kurt replied in a feminine voice. He felt Blaine's laughter vibrate in his chest.
"More like, 'I knew we shouldn't have sent him to an all-boys school'" Blaine mimicked his father's deep voice.
"But your father runs a sex club." Kurt couldn't fathom how a father could be unaccepting when they literally run a business dedicated to sex.
"I don't get it either. But Mum said, 'it's different when its your own child.'" Blaine mocked his mother's words.
"And so, despite their objections your father employs you in a sex night club full of half-naked men." Kurt tried not to snicker when he saw Blaine's cheeky grin.
"Like I said, it was a compromise. Danni thinks that the irony of the whole situation is hilarious and poorly thought out on my father's behalf."
"Danni's not the only one."
"And my father isn't too bad. He's gotten a lot better since running the club. It was probably one of the few good things to come from their separation, but I don't think he is at the point yet where I can say 'hey dad, look who I met at your night club and guess what? We are together now.'"
Kurt grinned at Blaine's words. They were together.
"Is there a branch of psychology that deals with hypocrisy?" Kurt asked.
"I don't actually know."
"You can meet my parents any day. All you will have to deal with is the stock standard Dad-jokes and my step-mother trying to over feed you." Kurt traced Blaine's collarbone with his fingertips. He could hear the steady beat of Blaine's heart through his shirt.
"Sounds wonderful." Blaine sighed. There was a pause. Blaine held his breath. He knew which question Kurt wanted to ask next.
"Blaine?"
"There was an incident one night." Blaine offered, not wanting Kurt to have to ask. "I don't know exactly what happened or what caused the fight. All I know was that I went down to deliver a few items to one of the rooms. When I arrived, things were getting out of hand. I stupidly stepped in instead of calling for help. I tried to fight, I broke a rib, a fair few bruises and a hefty concussion. I don't remember much. The doctor said my injuries were not that bad and I just needed a week or so of rest. It wasn't like the attack was directed at me for any specific reason, I just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. I know it's not going to happen again. I keep telling myself that it's safe to go down there but every time I try and make myself by head feels like it's splitting into two and I can't breathe. My body gets an anxiety attack even though my brain tells me everything is fine. I can't control it."
"Blaine. You don't have to go down there. I will never make you go."
"But I want to." Blaine was hugging Kurt tighter than before. "I want to prove to myself that I can."
"I am the captain of my soul." Kurt muttered the quote.
"Exactly." Blaine understood. He closed his eyes and Kurt closed his. They felt closer than they had ever been.
Helps! I have the writers block (hence why this chapter is rather short). Any inspiration would be greatly appreciated.
Also if anyone hasn't heard of the quote 'I am the captain of my soul." it's by William Ernest (Invictus), there is also another poem by Gwen Harwood (one of my all time favourite poets) where the captain is drunk. (if anyone is a music lover/musician I highly recommend reading some of her poetry)
Feel free to PM me with any ideas so we can keep this story going.
