The next morning Ben woke up feeling quite a bit better then he had the previous day. Almost too much better with how short of time it had been. He still felt sore when he sat up, but it wasn't anywhere near where it had been the previous day. Cautiously he paced his feet on the floor, putting weight on what had previously been his bad leg. When nothing came of it save for a bit of stiffness, he looked behind him to where Rey was currently sleeping.

Had she….? But why?

He reached out a hand as if to wake her so that he could ask, but thought better of it. She deserved some rest too, after all. Getting up as quietly as possible, he made his way to the cockpit, wanting to see what time of day it was. It felt like he had been sleeping so much lately that his concept of time was becoming a bit skewed.

Outside morning was just breaking, bathing everything in a soft glow. There were mountains on either side of them, with the forest not too far off in the distance. It was quiet, peaceful. It was a strange sight, but not an unwelcome one, as he had more often then not had only the cold darkness of space for scenery. There was the occasional planet, but he never paid much attention to what they looked like at the time.

Sleep wasn't an easy thing to come by, as he was usually plagued by dark dreams or bad memories. But here, he had yet to wake in the middle of the night, gasping for breath. He wasn't sure if it was because he had been that tired, or wither Rey's presence played a part. He was fine with waiting to find out, however; for now he just wanted to enjoy the sunrise.

After it was over, Ben decided to explore more of the ship, now that he was able. It had been along time since he had been inside the Millennium Falcon, and he decided to see if it was the same as he remembered while he waited for Rey to wake up.

/

The first thing Rey saw when she woke up was a mop of black hair in front of her. Confused, she blinked a few times to clear the haze of sleep from her vision. Looking again, Ben came into focus, sitting on the floor and leaning against what they had been using for a bed.

"Ben?"

When he didn't answer, she sat up, wondering if maybe he had fallen asleep there at one point during the night. Instead, he was awake, staring at a worn photo. It wasn't hard to recognize who was on it, younger though as they might have been: Luke, Leia, Chewie and Han. They all seemed so happy; she wondered if it had been taken after they had just finished their own war. Looking closer, however, she could see that Leia was holding a baby in her arms.

It much have been taken to celebrate Ben being born

"Ben," she said again softly, placing a hand gently on his shoulder, "I'm sorry," He reached up and gripped onto her hand tightly in response, as if on instinct, his eyes never leaving the photo. She realized then with a pang of guilt that she hadn't before thought about what being on his father's ship might do to him. "I should have -"

Should have been a bit more thoughtful, of course this ship would be painful, should have tried to get a different one

"No, it's – it's alright." He finally looked up at her, "You did what you had to."

His eyes were so sad, looking as if he could start crying at any moment and she felt her heart break at the sight.

The war may be over but there are still demons to fight

She got off the bed then, sitting on the floor and pulling him into a tight hug, his head resting on her shoulder. He didn't resist at all, instead burying his face and moving so that he could grab the back of her clothes with both hands. He held onto her tightly, desperately. A moment later she could feel something warm soaking through the fabric and onto her shoulder and she realized that he had started crying, silently and without movement.

She didn't want to think about what mastering the silent cry meant.

/

"They both…" He began weakly after a time, voice weak and broken, "they both sacrificed themselves for me." He was silent for a moment then, as if trying to collect his thoughts. "Back on Starkiller base, Han Solo…my father, he turned on the lightsaber. He knew Snoke wanted me to kill him, but I couldn't do it by myself. He knew that if I didn't do it then I..."

"Something worse would have happened." She finished the thought for him, and he nodded against her shoulder. She hadn't been able to see very well exactly what happened from how high her and Fin had been at the time, but if she thought about it more carefully, there wasn't any struggle. She hadn't been able to hear what was said, but she had seen the lightsaber turned toward Han, almost held out to him as if asking for something.

"And then later, on Kef Bir…mother gave the last of her strength to send me a message. Why did they…why did they have to care so much? I'm not worth it."

Rey could feel her heart breaking with every word that he spoke. She held him closer to her, wishing more then anything that there was more she could do to make him feel better. "It's because you are worth it."

/

"It's because you are worth it." She said it with such conviction, such confidence, that Ben found himself almost able to believe it. She was always amazing him, and he found himself wondering again how he possibly managed to get so lucky.

He moved so that he was in a more comfortable position, resting his head against her shoulder so that he was staring at the wall as he spoke, "How can you believe in me when no one else ever did?"

Why would you bother with a monster

"I told you before; from the first time we touched, I could sense the conflict in you. You didn't get a choice before, and I wanted to give it to you. That's never going to change."

"Thank you." He couldn't think of anything else to say, didn't know how to put into words what he felt. Instead, he settled for letting the feeling cross the connection between them, so that she could know just how much this it truly meant to him.

If this is a dream, then never let it end

/

They stayed curled together on the floor for awhile, until Rey suggested about getting some breakfast once she could tell Ben was feeling better. Not everything was solved yet she knew, as that would take time, but for now it felt they had made good progress, and that was enough for her. After they ate, they decided to make their way to the village, holding hands the entire way.

Along the way Ben had asked about the fact that he was much farther along recovering then he should have been with how little time had passed.

"Why did you do it?"

"You shaved my life, without you I wouldn't be here." She answered, wondering why she had even bothered trying to do it in secret when he had been sleeping the previous night. "I honestly would've done it on Exogol if it hadn't made me feel like I was going to pass out."

"You were going to do it even back then?"

"Of course! You're too important, I didn't want to leave you like that."

"You spoil me with your kindness." He said with a grin, lifting up their joined hands and placing a soft kiss upon her knuckle.

"It…it was nothing." She said, glancing away as she felt her cheeks grow warm.

Once they went from mountainous desert to the lush greens of the forest, they were met by Eir, almost as if she had been waiting for them. Which, if Eir was as force sensitive as Rey suspected, could have very well have been the case.

"Ah, my dears it's so good to see you again!" Eir greeted them with a large smile as she spoke. "I'm so glad that you decided to come. I can't wait to show you around, and everyone else is excited to met you."

"To see us? Why?" Ben asked cautiously from his place at Rey's side.

"They don't get out much, and always love hearing news from outside. Wouldn't you, if you didn't get much communication?" Eir didn't wait for an answer, instead motioning forward. "Well then, shall we go? I always like to show anyone new how to get there so that they don't get lost."

As Eir lead them through the forest, it was a good thing that Rey had been holding onto Ben's hand, as more then once she had stopped to marvel at the indigenous plant life, and it wasn't until she felt a gentle tug from him that she had remembered to keep going.

She loved the forest; it was so much brighter and colorful then the desert of Jakku she had grown up with. Every inch of it was crawling with life and a part of her wanted to bury herself in it and never come back. Honestly if she hadn't been worried about being found, she would have much rather landed the Falcon in here.

"Rey."

"Hmm?" She looked up at Ben, his voice breaking through her day dreaming. There was a small grin on his face, leaving her trying to keep her cheeks from growing warm as she wondered how long he had been watching her.

"We're here."