"I was born into darkness, but I am made of light."
-Christy Ann Martine
—Levi's POV—
That brat punched me in the jaw, and I'll admit she's much stronger than she looks. As a reflex, I lifted my fist back to return the favor but froze when she flinched and her uninjured eye seemed to glaze over as though she wasn't seeing me.
"I-I'm sorry sir... please don't punish me," she said, her voice barely a whisper as she closed her eyes, clearly bracing herself for the blow she was sure to come. I sighed almost silently and lowered my fist, squatting down to the eye level of the terrified girl in front of me.
— Emmryn's POV —
I don't know how long I stayed there on the floor braced for the blow I was sure to get, but when it came, it was not at all what I expected. There was no pain. Instead, I felt a warm touch that was gentle yet firm as a hand was placed on my cheek. I started shaking, still terrified.
"Brat." I didn't respond. That didn't sound like something Friar would say, but hey maybe he had a new insult for me to try and throw me off guard.
"Oi. Brat. I'm talking to you." That really didn't sound like him, but still, I couldn't let my guard down. He's already done this too much to me. Who knows what more he could be capable of?
"Emmryn, look at me," the voice said gentle but stern. This shocked me into opening my eyes. The captain sat in front of me at eye level with his hand on my right cheek. I froze, unsure of how to handle this. I had, after all, technically just assaulted an officer.
"Emmryn," the captain said calmly, his face only slightly softer than its usual stoic expression, "calm down. I'm not here to hurt you, but you are gonna have to face your fears, starting now. You won't survive if you can't even handle simple human touch." I looked at him with tears in my eyes.
"You have no idea why I am scared of human touch. You all talk about these titans, but humans are just as bad. Look at me. Look what humans did to me," I said, my voice shaking from fear or anger I'm not sure maybe a bit of both.
"Tch," the captain scoffed as his hand left my cheek, "time to get out of this damned pity party. Yeah a lot of humans are absolute shit, but not all of them are. It's not your job to decide whether humanity is worth saving. Your job is to follow orders. You're a soldier. Start acting like it, or else you're worthless to me." The softness in his face was gone. I looked at the ground ready to explode from anger and pain. The room was deadly silent. You could hear the gentle breeze blowing the leaves outside, but you could also cut the tension with a knife.
"Get out," I said, my voice barely audible as I started to stand up on my own, doing my best not to shake.
"What was that, Cadet?" Great he sounds irritated, but I'm done getting treated like this. Too many people have pushed me around in my life. I looked him in the eyes without flinching.
"I said. Get. Out. Captain," I spat the last word at him. Before I knew it I was being pushed into the wall with his hand on my neck. I wanted to scream for help, but I couldn't. He glared at me before seeing my fear and dropping me to the ground.
"I am your commanding officer. You do NOT give me orders. Understand, Cadet?" He said, venom dripping from the last question. My voice failed me so I simply nodded, giving a shaky salute. He nodded and his harsh gaze softened to a more apathetic yet still disgusted one.
"Good. Now clean yourself up, brat. Dinner starts in an hour and you honestly fucking reek. Do us all a favor and bathe thoroughly. Also, do NOT be late for dinner. You will be meeting my squad tonight," captain ordered before walking out, and I hear my door lock. Damned captain must have a spare key.
I take a deep breath and avoid looking in the mirror as I prepare my bath. Looks like someone (probably Hange) had stocked the bathroom with some basic cleaning necessities, which happened to be some of my favorites from childhood. Clearly Erwin had been involved in this too. I let myself smile despite myself, before beginning a deep thorough cleaning I knew my body and hair desperately needed.
The hot water from the bath was soothing on my skin and did wonders for my aching muscles, but I knew I did not have much time to enjoy it. I focused primarily on getting the matted blood out of my hair before using the honey scented shampoo and body wash that Hange got for me. While drying off, I forced myself to look in the mirror, choosing to focus on the fact that my hair was uneven. Sighing, I quickly took some scissors and evened it out a bit. My hair was now longer in the front reaching to my mid chest and shorter in the back reaching to my shoulders. I also cut my bangs to where they were long enough on the right side to cover my eye and my scar and short enough on the left side that I could easily see (basically asymmetrical bangs). Satisfied with how hidden my right side of my face was, I rinsed the hair that I had just cut off of me before drying myself with a towel and quickly putting on a turtleneck sweater, noticing the soreness on my neck where the captain had grabbed me. I finished up with my knee length skirt and some simple black flats before walking downstairs to the cafeteria.
When I entered the cafeteria, I found myself kind of confused on what to do. My eye surveyed the area and I noticed several stares in my direction and I realized these people had no idea who I was. I looked down awkwardly, still blocking the doorway until a voice interrupted my thoughts.
"Cadet Emmryn." I turned around to see Erwin behind me waiting to get through the door. I nervously moved out of the way and saluted him. He nodded as his way of telling me at ease. I released my solute. "You have not been to the cafeteria yet have you?" I shook my head no. "Ah... then allow me to show you how it works here seeing as your squad has not yet arrived," Erwin offered. I nodded and followed him as he led me to where we received our rations.
Tonight was what looked like a mushroom soup, steamed potato, and a roll of bread. I quickly thanked the commander (I'm still having trouble thinking of him as my older brother especially after that stupid letter.) before walking off to find a table. Everyone seemed to look at me with mistrust, so I decided to take my seat in a corner where there seemed to be no one sitting.
I ignored the stares I was getting and ate my food quickly and properly. Being sustained through an IV for so long really did a number on my stomach. It was constantly craving food, but six years in the underground did not make me forget my manners. Right as I finished eating, I was approached by a girl with pale orange hair, a man with greyish hair with an undercut similar to the captain, another man with blonde hair that was clipped back, and a man with short black hair that went to a bit of a point in the back. They were all in uniform as well.
"Hi!" The girl greeted me with a kind smile and I simply looked at her with a small smile in return. Again, time in the underground did not ruin my ability to be polite, at least not to women. She seemed to notice I had no idea who they were.
"Oh! I guess the captain hasn't told you about us yet! We're the members of Squad Levi. My name is Petra Ral! I'm so excited to have another girl on the team!" The orange haired girl said excitedly with a huge smile as she took her food and sat next to me. The three men also sat down with their food.
"My name is Eld Gin, second in command. Nice to meet you," the blonde man introduced kindly. I nodded in acknowledgment before turning my gaze to the black haired man next to him.
"My name is Gunther Schultz," the man introduced himself eyeing me in slight distrust. Again, I nodded in response. I didn't mind them not trusting me. It made sense, and to be fair, I don't really trust anyone here either, except maybe Hange.
"Ahem! Well greenhorn, you're in the presence of none other than Oluo Bozado! I have the most confirmed kills on this whole squad!" The undercut man said trying to act cool. I've already decided I didn't like this guy. I try to remain cordial to people but this guy I have a feeling is going to push me to the point where I am not anymore.
"Oi, brat! I'm talking to you!" Oluo yelled as he got in my face, "I said who are you and how the hell did you end up on our squad when I've never seen you before?!" I glared at him. He was trying to act like the captain, but honestly, I've seen kids in the underground more intimidating than this buffoon. Instead of wasting my breath, I turned myself completely to my other side where Petra was sitting to see she was clearly irritated with Oluo as well. I smiled at her.
"Nice to meet you, Ral. My name is Emmryn. I look forward to working with you, Gin, and Schultz as well," my voice quiet but clear and kind. Everyone snickered as I clearly left Oluo off the list, well except the idiot himself.
Suddenly, I felt someone grab my arm and yank me back around. Oluo glared in my face with his hand squeezing my left wrist rather painfully. Without showing the pain in my face, I abruptly stood up, grabbed his wrist that was holding mine and abruptly twisted it behind his back HARD. He yelped in pain and released my wrist immediately, unable to move from the pain he was in.
"NEVER touch me without my permission," I seethed, my voice quiet and dangerous as I let go and he fell to the floor before quickly getting up to glare at me. My glare did not waver.
"Next time, I WILL break your hand," I warned. The squad stared at me in shock before looking behind me and jumping to a salute. I heard a "Tch" behind me, and I turned also in a salute to the raven-haired captain I now knew was behind me. He looked at me with a bored expression before nodding allowing us to be at ease.
"Now someone explain to me what the hell happened and why you brat," the captain said sternly looking at me, "are not in uniform." I could see Oluo smirk as he quickly jumped to answer.
"The new girl was being insubordinate, Captain, and when I tried to correct her, she attacked me, sir," the bastard said as he suddenly put on a serious soldier face as if he was explaining a battle situation to a commander. Captain Levi didn't respond. Instead, he turned his bored gaze to me.
"Is this true, Cadet?" He asked in his usual monotone voice. I thought about it. Maybe it could benefit me to take the fall here since these people may be my key to surviving this whole mess. Plus punishment couldn't be any worse than what I endured underground. "Oi brat!" The captain snapped, recapturing my attention. I saluted.
"Not exactly, Captain. However, I will admit to provoking Bozado first and being the one to insight the violence. I will take whatever punishment you deem necessary, sir. Also, I was not aware that I needed to come to dinner in uniform. I will not make the same mistake again, Captain," I said in a calm and measured voice. All of that is true, though the second part is stretched a bit. The captain looked at me as though he was gonna question me further but instead he moved on from it.
"Tch. Cadet, as punishment for disrupting the squad and not being in uniform, you will be cleaning my office every evening after dinner until the next expedition," the Captain decided, "Now all of you, quit causing a scene and eat your damned dinner. And cadet, that punishment starts tonight." I groaned internally but when I looked back and saw the shocked faces of my teammates, I decided it was worth it. Oluo even looked a little...apologetic. They noticed me looking at them and I gave them all a reassuring, but fake, smile before approaching the captain who had gone to get food.
"Captain," I greeted quietly. He hummed in response not seeming to pay attention to me.
"I just wanted to know if I should wear my uniform to clean as well. I have already finished my dinner and have time to go and change if necessary, sir," I said, not wanting to get in trouble again. My survival instincts have overwhelmed my pride once again, so being a bit of a suck up was not doing too much damage to it. The captain turned to look at me, looking down at my left wrist which was starting to bruise where Oluo had grabbed it way too tight.
"That won't be necessary. No point in getting dust on your uniform. Meet me at the office in 45 minutes to start your punishment," the captain replied boredly before grabbing his tray of rations and walking to a table that seemed to have the other higher ups there including Erwin, Hange, and a few other people I did not know. I sighed inwardly as I limped to my room to wash my hands and dress in something a little more appropriate for cleaning. Tonight should be interesting...
Song: Still Here by Digital Daggers
Edited: 03/24/2020
