Second Husband


Paperwork is something that I hate now. I guess Police paperwork is tedious to me. But Once, I used to care about good documentation. Once, I walked in on House stealing the Doctor's lounge TV. I just didn't care enough to chastise him. I dropped some files on his desk. "Files are done." I said,

"I'll be doing a dance of joy just as soon as my leg is healed."

"I know the paperwork annoys you, but patient records are important. You can't just let them sit there." Yes I actually did say that, don't look at me that way.

"I had to. In the name of science. I let the crap pile up and I see which team member is the most self-flagellating – breaks down, clears up the mess." He stated tossing his ball up in the air. "Surprise was, it turned out to be you. Again. And you weren't even registered as a competitor. You miss me."

I shook my head. "You miss me. You hired Thirteen to replace me."

He tossed the ball, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. All pretty girls are fungible. You're avoiding."

I had to admit it to him. "I miss the job. I miss running around playing private investigator. I miss... the puzzles."

"Seriously. I'll fire Thirteen. Or Kutner, if you think Thirteen is hot."

I did, I did not mind looking at her, and somehow he had figured out my attraction to her.

But…

"I don't miss you."

With that, I turned to walk away from all of this. I knew I wasn't going to stay away from the team, but I was never going to submit myself to that man ever again. Slowly my Medical life began to unravel. I used my gift of puzzles to looking for people in my time in Boston. I took a two week vacation, because I had caught wind of a bounty, and I challenged myself to find the offender. It took me three days, but I caught him.

Then I knew that Those puzzles could keep my mind engaged too.

When I came back to work, it was all hands on deck for a puzzle for a cause of a lesion.

Me, Taub, Remmy, and Kutner are at the Patient's dining room table. Taub's phone in the middle of the table on speaker. "His place is totally clean. No animals. No hidden drugs or alcohol. No lead in the paint."

House's voice came through the phone and I knew whatever he had to say was going to be unhelpful. "And since you're not breathing hard, I assume you're not holding Cameron aloft in triumph. Which means no seizures." I rolled my eyes on this. Before I could respond he added, "Hey, speaking of breathing hard, Cameron, you engaged to Chase yet?"

"Sorry, we should have clarified. We're calling about the patient, not Dr. Cameron's love life." Remmy stated. I smiled.

"We aren't engaged." I answered and turned to Hadley, "Moves things along much faster to just give him the answers." I turned back to the phone. "Seizures can also be induced through —"

"After six years?" House asked a useful question.

"A year and a half. Through sleep deprivation or —"

"Sleep deprivation would take too long." He cut me off and changed the subject all together. "You living together?"

I sighed and dropped my head answering the question. "We spend most nights together." Then I got back on the subject. "There's a bunch of drugs that can lower a seizure threshold."

"And cloud the diagnosis with side effects." He paused. "His place or yours?"

"His, usually." I said drumming my fingers on the tables waiting to ride this idiotic investigation out.

"Interesting."

"You would've said interesting no matter what the answer."

"And no matter what the answer, it would've been interesting. No engagement. Commitment issues. His place, control issues. Not sure whose, but interesting."

Hadley rolled her eyes and walked away. "Yeah, moves much faster this way."

But you know, House had a point. I had a place of my own, and my bed was comfortable. So sas we transported our patient down the corridor I decided that maybe we could just be at my place

What can I say, he got in my head. "What time are you done? We could try that new sushi place next to my house."

"Why don't we stay at my house tonight?"

He looked at me strangely. "We always stay at mine."

I nodded. "That's what I mean. We — we used to split it. What happened?"

He shrugged, "I don't know. Closer to work."

I scoffed. "By five minutes. And my house doesn't look like it was decorated by a drunk rugby player."

"Well, we can discuss it. I hadn't really —" He started and I stopped in my tracks and turned to him.

"Why does it have to be a discussion? Can't you just stay over?" I asked.

Cuddy walked by just then and that tabled our discussion. I walked with him to the elevator. "What is going on with you? This is why we left House's team to avoid this constant flood of pure craziness."

I scoffed, "That's why I left House. You got fired." I rolled my eyes and walked away from Chase.

The patient we had been working with was agoraphobic. We needed to figure out a way to get his surgery done from home. Or at least move him so that he didn't know he was being moved.

Meanwhile, to monitor him someone had to stay with him. So I volunteered because I was so angry at Chase. I had my own space, It was nice both in New Jersey and in Boston, and neither of my places were being used because why? Chase's place was more convenient?

I sat in Stewart, our patient's living room when Robert walked into the house. He pulled out a cup of coffee and a paper bag with a bear claw in it and handed them to me. I smiled at my boyfriend and took them. "Thanks, That's nice of you."

He dropped down in the couch next to me and kissed me. Then he sipped his own coffee. " He doing good?"

I sighed, "Uh, burns are healing fine. He's stable otherwise."

"Good. So, uh, I could stay at your place tonight if you'd like." He said softly, as to not to wake Stuart.

"I can't."

"Well, you're not gonna sleep here, again."

"You might have noticed the lack of nurses."

"Because you're not on the case." Chase said, was he jealous? "You can't really use that as an excuse…"

"Dr. Cameron!" Stuart shouted from his room.

I startled and went toward him. "Wait here." I approached him my face full of concern. "Is it your stomach?"

"My legs are numb. I can't feel them at all." he said in a panic. I would panic too.

I watched him all night and in the morning I headed for the hospital when the nurses arrived. Chase argued with me about bringing Stuart to the hospital instead of leaving him where he was. "How am I gonna place the leads in the exact spot on the right ventricle without fluoroscopy?" He stated. "The force?"

I looked at him and shrugged. "Taub put in the temporary one."

"You can do that playing pin the tail on the donkey. Permanent pacemakers need precision."

"So we can use the portable X-ray." I said trying to provide solutions that were best for this case.

"It's not real time."

"A sonogram?"

"And what happens when I put him into v-tach because the sonogram isn't precise enough?"

"He's dying." I stated exasperated

"Exactly why I don't want to be the one to kill him."

I sighed. "Thanks." I got up from the chair and tried to go off to puzzle on this on my own when he followed me.

"You knew I'd have to say no. But you came anyway. You just wanted a reason to be angry at me. If there's something wrong between us, then —"

"Forget it." I stated annoyed and continued to leave.

"You know why we spend nights at my house?" I stopped and turned to face him my arms crossed across my chest. "Because when we spend them at yours… I could tell you didn't want me there."

Okay… I didn't mean to make him feel that way.

"Why would I keep inviting you over if I didn't want you there?"

"You always kicked me out every morning. You never offered me a drawer. You never cleared out your closet for me. I was just a visitor."

Oof. I felt gutted. It was that whole tendency to have one foot outside the door that way I can't get hurt.

I dropped my arms. "How long have you felt like this?"

"From the start." He moved closer and took my hand in his. "I know it's hard for you because you lost your husband, but." He paused taking my expression in. Something no one has ever taken the time to do. "I can't keep chasing you forever."

Then he handed me Stuart's file and left me standing there looking all stupid.

I ran into him after the case was solved. We had taken a couple of days to cool off, I had given myself time to think about how I made him feel. "Hi."

"Hi." He said opening a can of soda he had picked up from the vending machine.

"You were right. About my husband." I said and signaled for him to sit with me. We sat together and I took his hand. "It affected me. It still affects me."

"If you're saying you'll never be able to —" he started but I placed my fingers on his lips interrupting him.

"I cleaned out a drawer for you." I said and I smiled. He imitated my smile. "Like a big one."


The week Our Colleague Dr. Kutner killed himself, Chase and I had been planning to get away. We were going to go to montauk. But all I could see was an opportunity to solve the big medical puzzles. I know I left the team, but whenever I was able to work with them I felt fulfilled. I wanted back in, but I had to be subtle about it.

You smile… I knew you would appreciate my ambition.

I saw Chase right before his last surgery before we left and I whispered. "I need to push back our getaway."

"No you don't." he stated. "Found you a board. Perfect size to learn on."

I did want to learn to surf, and I smiled. "I'm just postponing. O'Neill from Philly General wants me to get a patient in to see House."

"So?"

"I owe him a favor. He's taken about a dozen of my referrals over the last year." I stated running my fingers through my hair.

"I meant so, that's five seconds to hand House the file, 30 for him to question your real motives, a minute for witty comments comparing the length of your legs to Thirteen's… Plenty of time left over for the shore." he insisted.

"I need to make sure he doesn't toss the file in the trash as soon as I'm out of sight." I stated.

"Babe, can't you repay the favor on another case?" Chase said, and I never hated being called babe '' more than that second. "After last week, I could really use a break from this place. We both could."

I frowned thinking about Kutner. "Once I'm sure he's really on the case, then we're out of here. And these legs and every other part of me will be all yours." I said smiling and then I kissed him before leaving.

We never went to Montauk that weekend. Chase wasn't happy. "Hey, so we're still leaving tomorrow, aren't we?

House had figured out a way to trap me into working the case with him, and I knew Chase was not going to be thrilled. "I'm not sure. The referring doctors didn't realize that his hiccups were —"

"Hiccups?"

"With this duration and intensity, most likely pathological, and it could mean it's serious."

"Are you avoiding me?"

probably

"No."

Lets be real, I probably was. It's what I do. I was not feeling emotionally steady. Kutner's death rattled us all. I was choosing to block out those feelings.

All feelings.

I was focused on my goal.

"So I shouldn't be at all concerned that you're treating another doctor's patient for hiccups instead of going on a vacation I spent a week planning.

"There is a reason I need to stay with this case a while longer, but I can't tell you what it is." I stated to Chase.

"So you admit you lied to me. And now you're asking me to trust you?"

"Yes."

"Okay." Yep that was what he said. At that point in time, Chase was easy. He trusted me.

House had been watching and came up to me after Chase walked away. "Explain why you ditched Chase and ran the differentials, and the tests."

"You told me to."

" Well, I'm not your boss, as you usually take great pleasure in pointing out." House stated. "Hey, you don't still have the hots for me, do you?"

"I care about the patient and I care about the people who work on your team." I stated thinking of Kutner again. "They've been through a lot lately. I just thought I —"

"Was Florence Nightingale." House interrupted. "Yeah. You're gonna nurse us back to spiritual and mental oneness. That would make sense if we were having this conversation a week ago."

"Think what you want — that I'm here to get a job, that I'm here to wrap you in swaddling clothes." I shrugged.

"The problem is, I think neither. Because neither makes sense." he said and then gets a far away look as if he is putting together a puzzle. "The only thing that does… doesn't."

House was not the only one questioning my motivation for putting chase on hold. Why was I doing that? Either way, even Foreman questioned me. "How do you think House is doing?" I asked Foreman as we collected culture samples from the patient.

"Is that why you're here?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"No it isn't." He said, calling me out on my shit. "Even if House was messed up by Kutner's suicide, it wouldn't matter. He already thinks life is nasty, brutish and long. And misery helps his diagnostic skills. All of which you know so… Why are you here?"

I sighed. "Which answer would you believe?"

"If you want Kutner's place, it's fine with me. I could use someone else with the stones to stand up to House. But you've gotta know it's gonna blow up your relationship with Chase."

I scoffed "All I did was postpone a three-day trip."

"With Chase." He asserted, "To be with House."

House confronted me later. "You're not even supposed to be here." I stopped to look at him and waited for him to tell me to stop what I was doing. "What? Oh, I don't care what you do with him." He said dismissively. Then he got on with his true issue. "You're not doing a favor for a doctor in Philly. You're doing a favor for an oncologist in North Jersey."

I laughed. "I'm spying on you for Wilson?"

"Spying, preemptive grief counseling."

I rolled my eyes and continued doing what I was doing. "Wilson sees you ten times more than I do. He's a better liar and he wouldn't have to cancel a vacation to do it."

"Good points." He conceded and went on to berate our patient who happened to be an environmentalist and a staunch vegan.

I don't really know why I wanted to work on the team so much, except for the fact that I really didn't want to go to Montauk with Chase. I could feel something big. He'd been lying to me for the better part of a week. But it was that kind of lying like he was ready to burst into song. He had a surprise for me and I didn't know what my answer would be. So I didn't want to go.

Cuddy approached me later in the er while I was looking at Doug's chart. "You know what vacation means, right?"

I quirked a brow. "You're here because of House, Chase or overtime issues?"

"He's very concerned." Cuddy said. I looked at her skeptically. "Chase, not House."

"Well, if it's all right with you, I'd rather communicate with Chase by communicating with Chase." I answered and turned back to the chart.

"Are you in love with House?"

I let out a laugh and looked at Cuddy. "You… are not concerned about me. You're marking your territory."

"You shouldn't be involved with House. Neither should I. Neither should anyone. You and Chase are good together. Just don't screw it up." she said and walked away from me.

No, I wasn't in love with house. I just didn't think I could Marry Chase…


House, as always astutely read my inner feelings. "Still enjoying your day off, I see." He said as I walked up to him in the Oncology suite.

"Why are you prepping him for chemo?" I demanded.

"The more interesting question is why do you care?"

"You're not even sure that it's —"

"What I mean is," House interrupted my rant. "why do you care from here? You can monitor the patient from home. What's the difference between here and home?"

"You're not at my home." I said putting on a false concern. Then turning to my normal voice I answered his question. "This has nothing to do with —"

"Any other differences? Hmm… there's less medical equipment, more training bras, and more Vegemite sandwiches." He stated. I rolled my eyes and leaned back watching for Doug's reaction. "Actually, technically, right now, Chase is here. But that's because I called him, and you didn't know that. And it's irrelevant to my point. Which is… You and Chase are over."

"You are wrong."

"You decided that his single drawer of clothes is one drawer too many. But you don't have the guts to tell him." He shrugged and leaned back against the glass. "So… You're emotionally walking away instead of actually walking away. Which is stupid 'cause only one of those is good for your heart."

I paused. I needed to tell someone what I was freaking out about. I couldn't hold it anymore, and House wouldn't care beyond having the satisfaction of knowing my motives. "He's gonna ask me to marry him." I whispered. "I was looking for some thick socks. Found the ring."

"And you want to say no. So I circle right back to his single drawer of clothes —"

"I don't want to say anything." I said with a sigh. "I don't want him to ask. Not now. Kutner… We're all a little freaked out. When we go home, we just wanna hug someone." I stated and turned to face him. "We just wanna know everything's gonna be okay. I don't want him to propose just 'cause he's scared."

"Oh." House said, and we stood there staring at each other. Was that understanding? Was that pity? I don't know but I saw some emotions play behind his blue eyes and then he left, leaving me alone about it.


Later , I just sat in the Cafeteria. It was long since the time for me to go home. Chase walked up to me and just kinda stood over me a moment before dropping down to the chair across from me. "I've been looking for you."

"And… I've been thinking about you. Just hadn't reached the looking stage yet." I said pensively.

"Which is the problem." he said. "You asked for a day. I gave you two. You told me you had a secret you couldn't share. I respected that." He was not even angry. He was disappointed and I couldn't blame him. "Now I don't know what's worse — blowing off our vacation to hang around House, or continuing to blow it off when he won't hang around you?"

I let out a nasal little laugh, and shook my head. "If you think I'm the least bit interested in House —"

Chase raised his voice, not a scream just showing how upset he was. "I don't know what I'm supposed to think?"

"I know this looks bad. And —" I continued placidly, but he interrupted me.

"I don't care how it looks. I care what it is. And you're not telling me what it is." I stare at my sexy Ausie boyfriend and try to muster up the answer I wanted to give him if the question actually came out of his mouth. "I'm trying to trust you, but…"

"I just… I need a little more time."

"No."

I sighed. "This… has nothing to do with House."

"Yeah, well it has nothing to do with me, either. Not anymore." and he broke up with me. I wasn't ready to let him go, but I knew my attitude had pushed him away. We stared at each other for a long time until he blinked. He stood and walked away throwing "Let me know when I can come pick up my things." over his shoulder.


House found me in the ER later, he had solved Doug's issue and he was actually on his way home. House said that he was preparing for another trip abroad to the place that had made him sick in the first place. "He almost died." I commented with a shake of my head. "He can't take a few days at home with his family?"

"People only change after trauma if they wanted to change before the trauma." He answered, looking at me. His voice took on a quality that he only seemed to take on with me when he was trying to express tantamount of sympathy for me without seeming like a softy. "Or if they've watched too many afterschool specials."

"You talking about Chase?" I asked picking up Dug's files that I would have to send back to his doctor in Philly.

"I'm talking about you." He said leaning back on the stretcher next to him. "You lost husband number one. No surprise that the death of a colleague would make you question another long-term lease."

I snorted. "You teaching commitment classes? 'Cause I thought you were too busy with your lecture on —"

He laughed fakely to interrupt me. "I'm sure that was going to be hysterical. Let me just give you the Cliff Notes. Don't try to dump him by dumping cases on me."

I sighed again. "I told you I never wanted to dump Chase."

"Absolutely. You want him to dump you." He said preparing to leave. "It's totally different. Much less guilt. Either way, you're out of reasons to avoid him. Kutner was a pretty dumb one to begin with." Then he walked out of the room.

Damn… He read me like a book again.

I had to find Chase. So I hurried to the locker room. There he was changing his shirt

"I should never have postponed our vacation." I said , startling him.

He shook his head and continued to button his shirt. "I should never have planned it."

I could feel the tears prickle in the back of my eyes at his indifference. I didn't want to cry, but the rejection was getting to me. These childhood wounds were my trap for a long time. "I found the ring in your sock." I said and he stopped to listen to what I had to say. "I didn't want you to propose out of some sort of knee-jerk reaction to what happened to Kutner."

He stayed silent for a long time, and then he nodded his head. "Well, I guess you don't have to worry about that anymore."

"I'm not. I… I don't care how it happens." I said, finally finding the words for him. I wanted to try. Because he meant too much to me to lose him by this point. "I just want it to happen."

He pauses and looks at him. "Are… Are you proposing to me?"

I let out a wet laugh. "I'm... proposing that… you propose to me."

"After I broke up with you." He said in disbelief. "After you ruined my planned proposal, you expect me to —"

I thought, why not? It seemed to be our pattern. He'd find his pride and drop me and I'd wake up from my denial. This time, It was all his choice. I was not going to do it because there wasn't another choice. "I'm not expecting. Hoping." Chase exhaled loudly and took a step toward me and dropped to one knee. I laughed and took my hand. I didn't even want to let him ask… Just that he was not willing to leave me. Not to abandon me like everyone else. "Yes"

He laughed and stood we embraced tightly there in the hospital and went home together. We never made it to Montauk.


We got married two weeks later. I never did the whole wedding thing slowly. That is why here in Storybrooke I am determined that I will not rush it again… That second marriage was sweet, but it was almost as short as the first.

However, this is where we got into the situation we are in now, Regina. And it all goes back to when I was with Chase. We were eating dinner at our favorite restaurant right before I signed the prenup. I had to tell my new fiancé something, and I knew that I didn't know how to bring it up.

"I could eat from this place seven days a week."

I nodded, "We practically do."

The waiter came and cleared away the table and Robert leaned forward on the table. "You can order tomorrow night. Do you want some wine?"

"No, thanks." I said and paused. It was now or never so I just took a deep breath and blurted out. "I have my husband's sperm."

"Your dead husband's?"

"We froze it when he got diagnosed."

"And you kept it?" He asked incredulously. "All this time?"

"I used to think if I didn't find anyone, or ended up with a woman… but then…"

"You found a male someone."

"I know. But…"

"What if it goes wrong? What if I turn out to be a radical anarchist with a secret family and that I age backwards?"

"Nobody plans on getting divorced." I said, "I didn't plan on my husband dying so fast, but he did."

"So you're saying you want a prenup, in liquid form."

He left the restaurant then. He wouldn't listen to my thoughts for Jay and his sperm. And Yes I could understand it. But IT was Jay. He didn't get to stay and be a dad. His family didn't get the grandchild they wanted. And I knew I could carry it, because I had already done it.

So I went to the one person I knew could be impartial. I walked into House's office and startled him out of his thoughts. He was thinking hard, just staring at a coffee cup.

"Got a minute?"

"There's something wrong with this cup." He mumbled.

I rolled my eyes and continued. "I need someone to bounce ideas off of. Someone to be my whiteboard. That's how you taught me to work." I rambled and started to pace his room as he watched me dumbfounded. "I have three choices. First, I can accept it's over, pretend we don't work in the same hospital, have selective visual impairment when we pass each other in the hall. Second, I can accept it's over and leave —"

"Or you could try making him angry. Standard choice number three." He said shrugging and leaning back on his desk.

"Third, I can talk to him. But it's not like I have any new fact that I can present and Chase has this romantic view of love that reality can't compete with."

"I know how you could succeed."

I stopped pacing and faced him. "How?"

"Just say the magic words: "I will destroy my husband's sperm." I looked at him dubiously. "Oh, you mean succeed without doing that. Probably not."

"I have doubts. Normal doubts." I stated. "It's not wrong to prepare for bad things to happen even if you don't expect them to. I don't expect my condo to burn down, but I have fire insurance."

Taub walked in just then, and interrupted our brainstorming session. "Patient's girlfriend left him, now he wants to leave us."

House moved toward the door then. But before he left, he shouted over his shoulder. "If your condo rules don't let you buy insurance, would you go homeless?"

That analogy made sense. And so I got the forms to destroy the sperm.

"I don't wanna be homeless." I said to him as he was scrubbing in for surgery.

"Okay. You can stay in the condo. I'll find some other —" Which was another fight we were having. My Condo in Boston. I had to sell it…. Good thing I didn't.

I shook my head, that wasn't what I had come there to rectify so I interrupted. "That's not what I mean. I wanna marry you. I got the forms to destroy the sperm."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." I said and smiled at him.

"I wanna hug you but then I'd have to rescrub."

I nodded and stepped back. "I know" I walked out of the scrub room, and my heart plummeted to my stomach. What was I about to do? No… don't look at me like that, you don't know Robert… Here's what happened next.

After surgery, Chase found me in the locker room just staring at the forms. "You don't wanna destroy it, do you?"

I jumped and looked up at him. "I said I was gonna do it. I'll do it."

"But you don't want to."

I sighed. "I want to be with you. Maybe I'm not comfortable with it, but —"

"Let's say it's our fifth anniversary. Are you ready to destroy it now? Tenth. Three kids. They spend their summers in Melbourne and have annoying accents. It's disgusting how happy we are. You ready now? You don't have doubts. You just don't wanna kill the only thing left of someone you loved." I thought about what he was saying and I started to cry. Because that was it. It was all that I had from Jay. He held me while I cried. Chase kissed the top of my head and whispered' "Don't do it."

"I do have trouble giving things up." I mumbled against his shoulder then sat up and looked at him. "For example, I never canceled any of our wedding plans." He laughed, and I followed and he held me again.

So it didn't get destroyed… So… How did I end up back in Boston and divorced you ask? Oh boy If only I would have known I'd be among people more sinister than Chase, I would probably still be married. But the real reason was the Lie.