Chapter 9
I stand open mouthed like a trout out of water. I can't believe Tanya has just said that. I'm too lost to reply back, I still think she is going to kill me but my life being prolonged for a few minutes doesn't seem so bad at the moment.
I think my muteness is annoying her more than my smartass comments. "Really Bella" I scold myself internally piss off a vampire, something that can kill you in milliseconds great job, really great job I think sarcastically.
Tanya is standing in front of me, waiting on a response but I cannot seem to form words right now. My mouth just keeps opening and closing with no sound coming out. I realise during my self-scolding Tanya has begun talking again. It's probably another lecture about how Edward and I are not mates, I snort to myself but no quiet enough for it to go by unnoticed by a supernatural being with excellent hearing one that also happens to be standing right next to me.
Her eyes snap to mine, I've noticed that they have started to darken since we entered the hotel room.
She glares at me "Something funny Bella"? She asks seething. She doesn't give me a chance to reply as she continues on. " Oh it's probably me isn't it, the pathetic vampire swooning over a hundred and seventeen year old toddler trapped in a teenagers body. Is that what you're finding so amusing?"
"I'm giving you a place to stay, somewhere warm and safe and you throw it back in my face you really are a silly human" she walks away from me towards the windows presumably to look at the views.
"A silly human I think, that's right, that's all I am to vampires a stupid human who doesn't know how to make her own decisions or loo after herself.
"I never asked you to" I respond back, not budging from my space.
"What" she replies as she turns to face me again.
"I never asked you to, I never asked for a place to stay, or food or to keep me safe for that matter" "I asked for none of it. I wanted to stay out of your world because to you, I'm just a silly human" I shout back. Not knowing where my voice or anger has come from, sometimes I even manage to surprise even myself.
"Every time one of you enters my life all it does is hurt me and make my life harder"
I must really be on a roll or have a light shining down on me that says kill her.
"Well I won't put you out anymore, you don't have to put up with the 'silly human' any longer, I'm leaving." I pick up my bag from the floor beside the sofa where I left it and head towards the door.
Just to add a little more salt to her wounds I add these parting words of wisdom." I've survived this long as I am, without anybody's help. You don't have to start now."
With that I walk briskly out of her room, praying silently that I can remember my way to the lift so I can get down to the lobby and make my escape. I walk the path towards the lift that Tanya and I took earlier, looking around every so often to gather my bearings but also to make sure a blonde vampire isn't following me.
I find the lift and as luck would have it, it is currently at my floor, I step in hesitantly relief flooding me when there is nobody else inside. The ride down is short, filled only with my internal monologue to occupy my time. Thankfully no one else gets on while I'm thinking. I don't want to have to deal with all the stares and I'm better than you looks.
I reach the lobby and as quick and quietly as I can head towards the exit as to not gather too much attention to myself. Fortunately there isn't that many people here at the moment.
The doors open as I approach, slipping outside from the warmth that the hotel offers. I am greeted by my old friends wind and snow. The weather it seems has taken a turn for the worst tonight, probably to match my mood I think. The wind is freezing able to cut you, chilling to the bone. The snow just adds to the worsening conditions making the already difficult trek to my spot. Slush and ice litter the paths, my uncoordinated limbs not suited to these perils.
I didn't realise it was this late in the evening, my time with Tanya taking up most of the day and evening, the hours spent in her company seem as if they were just mere minutes. Annie is probably worried sick, imagining the worst as she always does. I quicken my pace as much as I can without hurting myself or any unsuspecting victims of my clumsiness.
What seems like an age but in reality a half an hour walk I make it back to our spot only falling twice, which to me is a victory in itself in this weather.
"Annie" I call out.
Maybe she isn't back yet I think, when she doesn't reply immediately. A second later I hear my name being whispered out before being engulfed in a bear hug. Annie always the worrier, but it is comforting to know someone cares about me in this messed up world.
She lets go of me and looks me over making sure I wasn't hurt.
"I'm sorry I'm late, the time got away from me, I didn't mean to worry you." I tell her quietly.
"It's alright Bella as long as you're ok"
"Annie I…. I forgot to get food." How could I be so stupid? I t's my turn to get food and I forgot just because I was with Tanya, I can't believe how selfish that was. Annie's probably hungry and now she won't have any food for the night.
I continue my rambling apology hoping to make it better. "I'll go now, maybe I can get some leftovers from one of the restaurants close by" I say half-heartedly knowing deep down that they would all be gone by now, but I needed to try and make up for my mistake.
"Bella" she gently calls me pulling me back softly. "It's ok you're fine, besides it's too late for you to go wondering the streets on you own. We will be ok for the night" She smiles at me reassuringly, which only manages to make me feel worse about letting her down.
She guides me over to our things as we sit down, huddling out of the way of the wind and what shelter we could muster from the snow. We sit in silence, my thoughts in overdrive Annie's probably giving me time to collect myself.
"What's wrong Bella"? Annie asks.
"Nothing" I reply as I fidget to get comfortable on top of my sleeping bag.
"How was your class"? I enquire sheepishly. She's definitely going to know you're avoiding the question, I think.
"It was productive, and it was good getting out of the weather" she replies kindly.
I think that's all she is going to say until she continues, lifting my chin up with her hand which I must of subconsciously dropped. Looking me in the eyes she presses on.
"Bella you don't have to tell me what's bothering you, you don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to. But just so you know I'm here it you do or if you don't, either way I'm here".
I nod not making a sound, just letting her know I heard her and understand.
"Whenever you're ready."
I shift down and get into my sleeping bag and hear Annie doing the same. I look around after I settle down for the night. Your spot is nothing more than an off to the side alley way dimly lit by a flickering street light some way away. You remember when you first got here that light was a constant source of light, now it's on its last legs.
You're covered over head by a fire escape and to the side a dumpster. Thankfully it doesn't smell as it's for recycling.
The alleyway is covered in snow as it's not important enough to be cleared by the snow ploughs. It's not much that's for sure, a far cry to what I used to live like but for now it's mine and Annie's spot. And at this moment in time I'm thankful I even have a spot.
