Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island, the Bass and Gopher teams were disbanded into a battle of the sexes challenge that put their taste buds to the test. With insect pizza, testicles, and roach juice on the menu, this the single biggest wretch fest this host has ever seen. Scott was able to beat Jo in the tiebreaker, leading the boys to win the reward after getting along while the girls were left in the dust after spending the entire day bickering and arguing. Will Jo and Anne Maria ever get along? Can Sky and Dave's relationship survive with them against each other? Can Lightning stop complaining about protein? For the answers to these questions, stay tuned to the most exciting episode yet...on Total Drama Island!


Anne Maria is sunbathing on a chair on the beach. Jasmine and Sky are playing volleyball. Jo is doing jumping jacks. The tension is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

Sky hits the ball too hard over the next and it hits Jo in the head.

Jo: Watch where you throw that thing, you-

A loud horn blocks out Jo's voice. They all turn to see the boys dancing and having a great time on the boat.

Dave: Not gonna lie, that was one of the best weekends of my life.

Cameron: Screw "one of." That was THE BEST weekend of my life.

Scott: Woohoo! My skin is smoother than a baby's bum!

Lightning: And the 5 course meals...it was like a dream come true.

Anne Maria gets up.

Anne Maria: Yeah yeah, we get it. You had the time of your lives.

Scott: Sounds like the ladies are jealous. They can barely get along, while us guys are tighter than family. Guys rule!

The guys cheer. Chris' voice blares over the loudspeaker.

Chris: Listen up, campers. As of now, all teams are officially dissolved. From here on in, it's every camper for themselves.

Jo: Finally. I can rely on myself and myself only. No more idiots to control.

She points back to Anne Maria.

Jo: Bring it on, Chris!

Chris: Theeeeen, take a look at this!

Another boat's horn can be heard coming towards the dock. Everyone gasps.

Jasmine: What is SHE doing here?!

Sky: That's impossible!

Dave: You've gotta be kidding me…

Chris: Back by popular audience demand...it's…Sugar!

Sugar: Yeeeeeehawww!

The boat comes to a stop and she jumps off.

Sugar: That's right. I'm back. And I ain't got no plans to leave anytime soon!

She walks towards the campers.

Sugar: I'm also gonna make sure every single Gopher here gets the karma they deserve for votin' me out and such! Especially you, outback girl!

Jasmine crosses her arms.

Jasmine: Bring it. You don't scare me.

Anne Maria: Ay, wait a sec! You said nobody's allowed back…

Chris: I did?

Anne Maria: "And once you leave…"

A flashback to Chris is shown.

Chris: And once you leave on the boat of losers you can never, never ever ever, EVER come back.

The flashback ends.

Chris: Oh yeah...that...yeah...I lied.

Anne Maria: Yo, that ain't fair! They got voted out fair and square!

Sky: Anne Maria, you're reasoning with a loudspeaker. That just doesn't look good.

Sugar: Hm...I'm hungry.

She looks down into the water and reaches to grab a fish.

Sugar: Get over here you little stinkers!

Jo: She was a fan favorite?

Chris: Not reeeeally...but we like her. Also returning to camp...iiiiit's Amy!

Everyone: OH NO!

Yet another boat pulls up to the dock. Amy steps off.

Amy: So you thought you could just get rid of me that easily? Big mistake.

Sugar: HEY, QUIT STEALIN' MY SPOTLIGHT!

Sugar pushes Amy into the water and then takes a giant bite out of her fish. Amy resurfaces.

Amy: You're gonna pay for that you big fat tub of lard!

Amy climbs out of the water.

Amy: Before you guys try to cross me, I've been living lavishly at Playa Des Losers. My sister's broken arms made her no fun but trust me, I got the inside scoop on a few people here. Some of you aren't very nice people, are you? Some of you can't judge me for the way I act.

She looks at Scott, and then to Sky.

Amy: Watch your backs AND your mouths.

Jasmine: Great. So Chris brought back my two biggest enemies.

Chris: Alrighty, campers. Report to the amphitheater where you'll learn about this week's challenge.

Sugar: Woo! I've got this in the bag! This'll be easier than crackin' a walnut at the end of July!

Jo: No one knows what that even means…

The boats speed away. Lightning looks back and sighs.


In the girls cabin, the four girls are sitting when Amy and Sugar enter.

Amy: I want a top bunk. You guys don't actually think I wanna sleep UNDER someone, do you?

Jo: There's one more top bunk.

Sugar: Guess that means I'm bottom! Fine by me. Easier to get to the hair of my enemies.

She chuckles and looks at Jasmine.

Jasmine: Sugar, you don't have to be this vile. We only voted you out because you threw the challenge and got Ella eliminated.

Sugar: That was the best decision of my entire life! However, it was your worst mistake.

She growls at Jasmine.

Anne Maria: HEY. She may have voted you out but there can only be one winner.

Sugar: You got that right, helmet hair.

Anne Maria: Oh, so that's how it's gonna be when you're walkin' around here with those jeans that are obviously 4 sizes too small!

Sugar and Anne Maria go face to face.

Sky: Woah, time out guys!

She jumps in between them.

Jo: Let 'em fight. For once it's with someone other than me.

Sugar: Whatever! I ain't plannin' on losin' this next challenge nor the game.

She stomps out.

Jasmine: Hey, Anne Maria. Thanks for what you did back there.

Anne Maria: Eh, it was nothin'. Someone had to put her in her place. Especially after dissing my hair.

(Conf) Anne Maria: I didn't come here for friends...I came to win. But I'm actually glad that along the way I met some cool people.


The contestants are sitting in mismatched chairs with boxes as their tables in the amphitheater.

Chris: Welcome to your next challenge! The time honored game of torture. Say uncle! You're all about to be put through a test of endurance so insane that some of them sent our interns to the emergency room. If you back down from the challenge or don't last ten seconds, you'll be eliminated. The winner will not only be safe from elimination, but will win this luxurious trailer! Yours to take home at the end of the summer.

The trailer sparkles.

Brick: What kinds of torture?

Chris: Why don't you ask my assistant?

Chris turns to Chef, who is wearing a hockey mask.

Chris: Okay, let's do this! Lightning, you're first up. Let's spin the wheel of misfortune to select your torture.

The wheel spins. Lightning looks at the wheel, anxiously waiting for it to stop.

Chris: Lightning, you got turtle puck shots! Our lovely interns spent weeks searching for the hungriest, crustiest, angriest, snappiest snapping turtles on the island. While you stand in the goalie net completely unprotected, Chef will hit the turtles at you with his hockey stick.

The turtles are seen growling and snapping in front of Chef on the floor.

Lightning walks over to the goalie net.

Chris: If I were you dude, I'd protect my coconuts...this could get ugly. If you can stay in for 10 seconds, you'll go on to the next round.

The buzzer starts and a turtle goes flying at Lightning. He ducks.

Lightning: Chris, man! This is a piece of-

A turtle hits Lightning in the head. Another on each arm and one on his crotch area. The buzzer sounds off. Lightning falls to the ground.

Chris: Aaaand Lightning stays in the game!

Lightning: Sha-awesome…

He then passes out.

Dave: Sheesh, that looks pretty painful.

Sky: Yeah...looks like it hurt a lot.

Dave: I would never let that happen to you.

Sky: Aw, that's so sweet. But if it was for a challenge, I'd want you to let me get hurt if it meant staying in.

Dave: You wanna win that bad, huh?

Sky: Absolutely.

Amy crosses her arms and glares at Sky. Sky turns and looks at Amy.

Sky: What's up with you?

Amy: Oh, nothing. I think the real question is what's up with YOU?

Sky: Uh...I'm gonna turn around now.

(Conf) Amy: The dirt I have on some of these people is gonna be so beneficial to my eventual win. Just you wait and see.

Chris: Next up...Anne Maria!

She looks at the wheel with a worried look on her face. The wheel spins and lands on hot marshmallow wax.

Chris: We're gonna wax every part of your body. If you can take the pain for a full ten seconds, you can go on to the next round.

Anne Maria: Eh, it don't sound too bad. I've had worse.

She gets on the chair.

Anne Maria: Try not to wax off my tan, Chefy.

Chef throws the marshmallow wax on her. She screams under it in agony. Everyone can barely watch, however Sugar seems to be enjoying it.

Chef finally rips it off after ten seconds.

Anne Maria: OW! That hurt!

She walks back to her seat.

Anne Maria: But my skin is so smooth...aww yeah, I look fresh as a daisy!

Amy: Maybe a daisy that wilted and died.

Chris: Well done, Anne Maria. You get to choose who goes next.

Anne Maria: Oh, easy. Sugar. And uh, if you can, pop her in a barrel with leeches.

Sugar: You little-

Chris: Come on, Sugar. It's your turn.

Sugar points at Anne Maria.

Sugar: We ain't done here!

She gets up and walks to the barrel.

Anne Maria: Yeah, you walk over there.

Chris: Oh, and if your victim can last ten seconds without saying uncle, you get eliminated instead. Which means you lose your chance to win the trailer!

Sugar hops into the barrel. She smiles and closes her eyes, but begins to feel uncomfortable. She starts shaking a little and eventually jumps out.

Sugar: Them little things were suckin' on my blood!

Chris: That's what leeches do...anyways, you lasted nine seconds. Not enough to stay in. Sorry! You're out. You can return to your new seat.

Sugar: UGH!

Jasmine chuckles.

Jasmine: Nice one, Anne!

Sugar: Stop laughin'!

Sugar's seat is replaced with a pillory. She sticks her arms and head into it and frowns.

Chris: Scott, you're next.

The wheel lands on wooden shorts. Scott walks over and puts them on.

Scott: Wooden shorts? Pff, big deal.

Chef brings out a woodpecker and Scott screams.

A montage is shown of the contestants. Sky gets hair ripped out of her nose, Jasmine gets squeezed by a boa constrictor, and Amy is covered in bees.

Chris spins the wheel.

Chris: Our next challenge will be...spending ten seconds in a crate with Sasquatchanakwa. Tough one! Amy, you get to choose the next victim.

Amy: Ha! Perfect. I choose Jasmine.

Jasmine gulps.

(Conf) Dave: All I could think was...man, poor Jasmine.

(Conf) Sugar: Ain't no way Jasmine was gonna survive that, hehehe!

Jasmine walks to the giant crate. Sasquatchanakwa is extremely agitated. Jasmine takes a deep breath and walks in. Loud roaring and yelling is heard. The crate shakes insanely, and before ten seconds are up, Jasmine falls out of the crate and crawls away. She has scratches and scrapes all over her.

Sky: Jasmine, are you okay?!

Jasmine: No…

She closes her eyes.

Chris: Well, since Jasmine didn't last long enough, she's out of the challenge.

Sugar cheers.

Chris: Now let's see who shows just as much courage as Jasmine and cries uncle.

Dave is seen running on a mini rock course with skunks under him. One sprays him and he falls.

Chris: Love the skunk jump!

Sky is seen listening to music. She throws the headphones off of her head.

Chris: And the new age music torture!

Chef is seen holding Anne Maria's hair. He pulls out a chainsaw.

Chris: And a little visit to the Wawanakwa Hair Salon.

Anne Maria runs away.

Chris: Oh, and who can forget the old ice cream brain freeze?

Cameron is seen eating ice cream. He stops and falls over.

Chef walks over to a fish tank and picks up two eels with gloves. He brings them over to Brick.

Brick: Shock treatment? Oh god…

Chris: And clear!

Chef shocks Brick and he yells in pain. He runs away.

Chris: You're out!

Jo: Ha! I knew he wouldn't last.

Chris: And next up is Scott.

Scott: Again?!

Chris: Scott, you'll be taking a swim with...a shark!

Chef wheels over a giant pool and adds a ladder. The shark inside smirks at Scott.

Scott: No, please, anything but that!

Chris: It's the shark or the pillory. Your choice.

Scott: I can't do it. Not with a shark.

He walks back to the pillory.

Chris: They're dropping like flies. Scott is out. That leaves us with Jo, Amy, Lightning, and Shawn. Shawn, you're up next.

Shawn jumps down.

Chris spins the wheel.

Chris: Shawn, your challenge is to avoid stepping on a nail.

Chef brings a giant wooden board full of nails to Shawn and drops it on the floor.

Shawn: Uh...there's so many. Where am I supposed to step?

Chris: That's for you to find out.

The buzzer sounds.

Shawn starts stepping around the wooden board. He slightly trips on a nail and family. The nails stab him.

Chris: OOOOOH! That's gonna hurt.

Shawn: OW!

Chris: Shawn, sadly you didn't last the full ten seconds. You're out. Up next, we have Lightning.

Lightning: I sha-got this in the bag.

Chris spins the wheel. It lands on the shark once again.

Chris: Looks like you'll be taking Scott's challenge.

Lightning: Yeah, I'd like to see that shark try to eat me.

He walks over to the pool and jumps in. The shark once again grins. Lightning begins to feel uncomfortable. The shark swims over to Lightning and Lightning gets out.

Chris: Aw, Lightning! You were in for eight seconds! Two more and you would still be in the game.

Lightning: Dang it.

Chris: And that leaves us with Amy vs. Jo.

(Conf) Jo: That trailer is MINE. I'm gonna win this challenge.

(Conf) Amy: Immunity is crucial for me. If I can win this, at least I get to stay a bit longer.

Chris: You girls will do a tiebreaker.

Chris spins the wheel.

Chris: Your final challenge is...the grizzly bear log roll.

Jo: The WHAT?

Everyone walks over to the dock where the grizzly bear is standing on a log in the water.

Chris: I'm sure you guys remember Dawn's friend, Falco from the talent challenge.

Jo: Don't remind me.

Chris: He performs with the circus and has been the European log rolling champion for the last twelve years. To win, you must last ten seconds on the log to avoid certain death in the piranha infested waters.

Amy and Jo look at each other.

Chris: One of you could back out now.

Jo: Amy, you first.

Amy looks at the bear.

Amy: No way. I'm not scared of a glorified beagle.

Amy gets onto the log first. She begins running on it. The bear makes her lose her balance but she regains it. She continues running and the horn buzzes. Amy stops and the bear falls into the water. The piranhas cause Falco to lose all of his fur.

Chris: And Amy wins which means Jo is out!

Jo: WHAT?! How is that fair?!

Chris: It's just how I work. Amy wins immunity and a trailer all to herself.

Amy: Oh my gosh, I'm gonna cry!

Jasmine: Save the theatrics.

Chris: One of the other eleven of you will be leaving. Tonight. Head to the confessional booth and vote out a camper other than Amy.


Chris: Okay, so first up we ran out of marshmallows.

Lightning: Aww…

Chris: I reviewed the confessionals and I have to say...there's a lot of hate in this group which is awesome! While I normally protect your privacy, in the spirit of airing your dirty laundry I'm gonna go LIVE with your confessionals.

Everyone gasps.

A small tv hangs down.

Jo: I think it's safe to say that not one person wants Sugar here.

Anne Maria: Suga's on my last nerve. Be gone!

Jasmine: Please be Sugar, please be Sugar…

Sky: I wish I could vote Amy out, but I'll go with Sugar.

Dave: Gotta go with Sugar. She's nuts. I can't stand her.

Shawn: Sugar. Voted her out once and I'm doing it again.

Lightning: Sugar. However, I think we should call her Salt because that girl is saaaaalty.

Brick: Sugar is nuts. And annoying. So she has to go.

Scott: Sugar is insane. I cannot work with that girl.

Cameron: I vote Sugar. She scares me.

Amy: While I thought Sugar and I could form a returnees alliance, she blew it. No one likes her, so I'm voting her out.

Sugar: Jasmine, you are done!

The confessionals end.

Chris: A lot of dirt revealed there, but in the end, it was still 10 votes against Sugar.

Sugar: Say what now?! I'm voted out again?! Dang it!

She gets up and stomps in front of everyone.

Sugar: Y'ALL BETTER WATCH YOUR DANG BACKS. I AIN'T DONE YET. I'LL GET MY REVENGE!

Chef carries Sugar onto a boat. The boat leaves as she sobs.

Amy: Well, I know you guys hate me and all, but I so need a fun night. Party at my new trailer!

Everyone cheers and they walk to her trailer.


The camera cuts to a cave. Falco tries on Sugar's clothes due to being naked from the piranhas.

Falco: Yee haw!


And there we have it. The first merge episode is done. Sugar's return was mainly because I love writing her and she brings drama, however again, she's a villain and we have too many. She doesn't fit the plotlines at all. I don't know how many fans she has, but if you are a fan, this is not the last of Sugar.

We now have 11 left. The next episode is gonna be a crazy one to write. See ya next time!