Session 4
Jet stared down at the shackles on his wrists. How had they come to this? Paraded from the holding cell surrounded by guards like common criminals, he was followed by Faye and Ed, both cuffed like he was. A guard held a dog carrier with Ein in it. The poor pup's nose pressed against the door. Jet knew they were headed to the court room.
But where was their lawyer?
"Hey, I already told you this shit wasn't necessary!" Spike's irate rebuke was easy to understand.
Jet paused and turned, bringing up the rear, Spike glared at the cop who had pressed himself against the wall with his hand on his holstered gun. The nervous fools had clearly assessed Jet's partner as a volatile threat. Unlike he and girls, who just had wrist restraints, they had cuffed Spike's wrists to a belt so he couldn't move much, in addition to a set of ankle shackles with a chain linked up to the belt. Every hitched step clanked and his ire only grew as the cops had over-tightened them to the point of pinching. Spike had already been irritable, though he'd been trying to conceal it beneath his usual careless facade. This was an illusion Jet saw through, and he hardly faulted the guy. Spike had survived the inside of a prison before, and not come out of it particularly healthy. He had the most to accurate idea of what was coming down the line. To be honest, he had handled the last days far better than Jet had feared he would.
With a sigh Jet turned and hoped they'd make it to the courtroom without a scuffle.
Spike grumbled, "Knock it off, chickenshit! I'm not going to hit anyone."
The cop's tight voice wavered, "S'not what your record shows."
"How big of an idiot do you take me for?"
Jet's breath froze in his chest, Don't anyone answer that, especially not Faye. Luckily for Spike they entered the courtroom and the cop didn't get a chance to respond. Releasing his breath, Jet followed the gesture of the bailiff into the row of wooden seats behind a table. The guard holding Ein's padlocked kennel placed it on the table.
A smartly dressed man adjusted his tie on the other side of the room. Jet did a double take as he realized there was an empty seat on their side.
"All rise." The bailiff called out bringing the packed courtroom to their feet. "The honorable Judge Lynchworthy presiding."
Standing up, shoulder to shoulder with Faye to his left, Jet sweated bullets. Where the hell was their lawyer?
The judge, a middle-aged women with a permanent scowl stamped on her face, took her seat up on the bench and nudged her squared off lenses up onto the bridge of her nose. She reminded Jet of a librarian with a permanent hemorrhoid condition. In a deep voice she read out, "Commonwealth vs the crew of the Bebop, hrm this is too much, let's summarize—in regards to various crimes." She shook her head and dropped the document. "Let's just get on with this fracas. Is the prosecution ready?"
The lawyer offered a bright smile. "Mr. Ajax Breeze. I am ready, your honor."
She turned to their table. "Is the defense ready?"
Jet's jaw hung open. He stared at the empty chair, his mind racing and tripping for a reply. His cuffed hands gestured at the chair.
To his shock, Spike blurted out, "Not that I have experience with this, but I don't think this is how it's supposed to work. We're kinda shy a lawyer."
The judge fixed Spike with the most acidic expression Jet had ever seen. Spike simply stared back up at her with half-lidded eyes. After a moment he flapped a hand as far as he could in the restraint. "I want to complain about the overreaction here. I've been nothing but cooperative. What is this shit?"
Ed chuckled into her hands while Faye rolled her eyes.
Jet clenched his teeth and hissed, "Shut up and let me handle this!" His heart thundered in his ears. What the hell were they going to do? He knew about being a detective, and how corrupt the ISSP had become. But this lawyery bit was beyond his scope. And clearly beyond Spike's, decorum had never been his partner's strong suit. Swallowing his nerves, Jet locked eyes with the stern judge and bleated, "Your honor, our attorney met with us all once and we haven't seen him since."
With an air of boredom, the judge picked up the document in front of her. "Every case gets one attorney assigned."
"But, he's not here."
"Every case gets one attorney assigned." No more inflection to her voice. "Let's proceed."
Breeze checked his watch. "We should have this polished off by lunchtime."
"Excellent," the judge gestured to him to proceed.
Jet's jaw hung open. Out of the corner of his eye he spied Spike glaring, through clenched teeth he muttered, "If I could cross my arms I would." He wriggled his hands the minute amount he could. "So Jet, I'll have to settle for, 'I told you this wasn't gonna be fair!'"
"Let me handle this." Jet eyed him.
Faye raised an eyebrow. "Are you a defense attorney?"
"Not exactly."
"Great, prison here we come."
Spike eyed Faye. "You'd be better at this, after all, it is a dog and pony show."
She clenched her fists, but kept her mouth shut.
Attorney Breeze came before the judge. "Your honor, the crew of the Bebop are comprised of the least law abiding criminals in the system."
Faye bristled. "Excuse me?"
The judge glared her into silence before turning her attention back to Breeze. He continued smoothly, "I will lay out the evidence, member by member, to demonstrate that they pose a real threat to civilized society."
"That's not true!" Jet shocked himself to find his own voice calling out. "We have been responsible for bringing many dangerous bounties in. I'm certain you have tried some of their cases yourself!"
A sharp rap of the gavel rang out. "Defense is to be silent until their turn!"
With a grunt, Jet stared at the back of the attorney's head. The man's buttery tone continued onto a list of charges between the crew members that seemed to go on forever. In fact more than once Breeze paused to take a drink from a glass of water. At long last he spread his hands wide, declaring, "By the time I conclude my examination you will find the evidence is damning, your honor. These criminals should not be allowed to go free." He dismissed himself and returned to his table, taking his seat. Breeze folded his hands in front of himself and offered a smarmy grin at Jet.
The judge gestured to their side and barked, "Defense."
Jet stood up and looked around the room at the crowd comprised of cops as well as civilians, his mind still reeled at the long list. "Your honor … we plead not guilty."
Silence stretched on. Uncomfortable as he felt all eyes on him. Jet glanced back and spied Spike with his head bowed, slowly shaking it. He caught the muttering just over his breath, "This can only end one way now."
The judge peered above her spectacles and raised an eyebrow. "That it?"
Jet shrugged. "Yes? I mean, we're the good guys. Pull our bounty records. See all the cases we've helped solve."
Breeze stood up and tugged his jacket. "About that, your honor, I will present the collateral damage connected with records Jet Black just mentioned. There is proof that this team does more harm than good."
Pointing at the prosecution that had just interrupted him, Jet tried to locate the word they always shouted in court cases, but it didn't come to him.
The gavel struck. "Opening concluded. Let's get on with it."
Breeze waved a hand. "Prosecution calls Faye Valentine to the stand."
A bailiff grabbed her arm and ushered her to the stand. After being sworn in, she sat with her hands folded in her lap, a cold expression on her face. There was no doubt she detested the unflattering jumpsuit, and now with hundreds of eyes on her, she bore the expression of a child forced to wear uncomfortable dress clothing to a formal event. Of course for Faye the opposite was true. She liked to be dolled up.
Breeze leaned on the stand and smiled at her. "Ms. Valentine, I remind you, you are under oath. Do you have unpaid debts?"
She lifted a shoulder. "Depends on how you define debts."
"So this is the way you're going to play it." He pulled out a list and presented it to the judge. "Faye Valentine's financial report. Note, your honor, that Ms. Valentine recently auctioned off a very expensive item and came into a sizable fortune. Yet not a single one of the numerous debts has been touched. In fact, note the recent purchases against her account, and under an alias, no less. Undoubtedly an effort not to be caught with the cash."
Faye offered a smooth smile. "That alias was essential for a bounty we caught."
Breeze one-upped her grin and handed the judge another piece of paper. "Here we have the bill from damage to the ship. This alias was also a fraudulent entry into a contest."
"A contest where a dangerous hacker couple attempted to hijack the ship. The damage came when we had to break our way onto the bridge to stop them! We paid for that door!"
The judge glanced between the two pages. "The amount spent over the course of this … uhhh … hunt was more than sufficient to settle your outstanding debts. Yet you ignored your obligation."
Her cuffed hands flexed before her. "We saved hundreds of people from getting hijacked and returned valuable data to a research doctor!"
"You left your debts standing." Judge Lynchworthy eyed her. "Shameful."
Faye leaned forward and yelled, "If we hadn't been there stopping them, who knows what would have happened. Besides, the Tutfords thanked us in the end."
"Us?" Breeze raised an eyebrow.
"Spike was with me."
Breeze gestured to the judge. "Let the court note that Ms. Valentine admitted that Mr. Spiegel was her accomplice."
Spike smirked at her. "Thanks Faye. Anything else you want to add?"
She hurumphed. "Wait'll you get up here, laughing boy."
After a lengthy run through Faye's lengthy list of conned victims, Breeze let her off the stand. As far as Jet could see the damage was already done. What next? The attorney pointed at Ed. "Bailiff, bring … uhh … " He narrowed his eyes at the paper. "Yeah, I'm not even going to try that name."
Without a complaint, Ed nearly bounced up to the stand, her cuffs rattling as she went.
After swearing her in, Breeze looked at her. "State your name."
With a flourish she raised her cuffed hands. "Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivruski the IV."
"Uhhh yah." Breeze scratched his head. "Were you once known as Radical Edward?"
She giggled. "Of course. They just call me Ed, most of the time."
"Most of the time?"
"Yup. When Ed does a good job and gets the info they need. Of course sometimes they call Ed a brat."
Breeze held up a hand, eye opening. "Wait, you said the 'info the needed'. What does that mean?"
Ed rocked back and forth grinning from ear to ear. "Easy. Ed is a net-diver. Ed likes to hack into things which makes it easier to find the bad men Bebop is after. When we catch them and make money it makes Jet happy."
"Hacking, as in breaking into the systems?"
"Oh yes. Edward is good at breaking passwords. Super secret stuff, like the ISSP, oh, and Ed also likes it when they ask her to poke around the government stuffs. Like cracking an egg. Lots of neat fishies there. Like this one time … "
Jet's brain short circuited so all he could manage was the sound akin to a strangled cat.
The chains clanked as Spike leaned over and whispered to Jet, "I call dibs on the top bunk."
See You Space Cowboy
