Author's Note: Hello to those of you still reading this story. I am holding a contest/character request for this story for three OC-Arrancar that will show up later in the story. For those interested, please check out my profile for more info.

Chapter 71

Combined Assault

Szayelaporro Granz, pinned to the wall by Lisa Yadoumaru's Kidou, resembled a tacky, fur animal. The ridiculous scene garnered a smile out of her. It suited him far better than it had any right to, and she took a long while to admire both her work and his lost expression.

"So, Kidou's on the table," she said. "Looks like you'd better leave things to me then, carpet guy."

It took Renji Abarai a long while to realize she meant him. " '…Carpet guy?' What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Your hair is red, and I figured the carpet matches the drapes, so—"

Turning scarlet, Renji howled, "Hey! Keep me out of your perverted thoughts!"

"I'm just saying…"

"Renji! I'm Renji Abarai!"

"Yeah, but I kinda like 'carpet guy' better."

"I swear, I'll—"

"Yes, I've heard more than enough of this pointless conversation." Szayelaporro pulled the rods out of himself before landing back on solid ground. "Kidou. I see. None of the data mentioned either one of you being well-versed in it. I must admit that gave me a start. Of course, this just means your dissection is going to take a few hours longer, Visored. I hope you'll put up with me when the time comes."

How Lisa wished he wouldn't grin like a madman when saying such things.

"I can't fight this bastard," she told Renji. "He's giving me hives. You deal with him."

"E-Excuse me?! Look, can you use Kidou again or not? It might be our only shot."

"Yeah, but that's more Hacchi's specialty than mine."

"I don't know who that is, but I'd appreciate it if you did something other than complain, lady."

"Yeah, yeah…"

"Yes, feel free to strategize as much as you'd like," said Szayelaporro in a friendly fashion. "Not that it will help."

"I've had more than enough of the crap outta your mouth!" Renji roared before bringing Zabimaru down with all of his might. For a moment, he saw a flicker of fear on Szayelaporro face before a cloud of dust and debris shrouded it. "Move aside already, clown!"

Szayelaporro's grin had slackened some by the time he reappeared, blood pouring down the side of his head. The reality he wasn't dead did nothing to improve Renji's mood, so he thrust Zabimaru at him over and over. Each time, Szayelaporro dodged with the aid of Sonído. He seemingly disappeared for good after a final swing. Renji's eyes widened as he searched around.

"Get down, moptop!"

Lisa pushed him just in time to avoid his head being blown off by a whizzing Cero. He observed it destroy a portion of the room in complete shock.

"Stop coming up with more stupid nicknames for me!" he spat.

"Gotta have something to stop me from going crazy hearing that four-eyes' drivel," replied Lisa.

"You have glasses! You're a 'four-eyes!'"

"…Alright, now you're just being mean."

Renji, about to snap, almost forgot Rukia's plight in the midst of all the stupidity. He didn't have time to waste on the likes of Lisa orSzayelaporro.

"I told you to calm down," said Lisa. "And stop making that stupid face. Even if Kuchiki is in trouble, there isn't anything we can do about it until we take care of him."

It pained Renji to agree. Nonetheless, he nodded.

Szayelaporro reappeared at long last, looking more bored than ever. He tapped his chin in clear agitation.

"This…is no longer interesting, I'm afraid." He laid eyes on Renji gasping for air. "You, Shinigami, are nothing special. The only thing you seem capable of is flailing around like an imbecile. Your Zanpakutou is just a power type with no special abilities. I'm surprised you even made it to the rank of Vice-Captain with such meager skills.

"And you, Visored, are just as disappointing. I'm aware you cannot use your Zanpakutou or even Hollowfy in this room, but it would seem you are nothing of worth without them. I'm seriously hoping the rest of your ilk isn't so pathetic. Oh, well. Maybe you'll serve more worth once I slice you open and figure out how you tick.

"It might be rude of me to say so, but neither of you have anything worth seeing. I believe it is time we finish this."

He derived great pleasure from flipping a switch on a handheld remote. At his command, dozens of grotesque Arrancar of all shapes and sizes burst through the walls and ceiling. The lot of them snickered at the sight of fresh prey.

"These," a grinning Szayelaporro began, "are my Fracción. I created most of them myself using—"

"Wait." Lisa stuck her hand up, putting a damper in his good mood. "If you're about to give us another long, pain in the ass speech, you can save."

"…You have a smart mouth. If only your fighting ability could compare."

"Blow me, you bubblegum-haired freak."

Szayelaporro closed his eyes in irritation though eventually found the strength to continue. "Fracción are given to Espada as proof of our immense strength. They are handpicked subordinates and are supervised directly by Arrancar numbered eleventh and higher. Some only pick one, while others pick many. My own are rather unique. You see, they are Hollow that I modified and then had Mistress Arashi transform into Arrancar."

"Does this fascinating story have a point?" Renji growled, making Lisa chuckle.

Szayelaporro, on the other hand, wasn't so humored. "Yes, perhaps we should skip the idle chatter. Have you figured out why I summoned them all here? I have deemed you both unworthy of dealing with personally. Sorry to say, but that makes you lower than the worms in the dirt. And now…we've reached the curtain call."

He pointed at Renji and Lisa, and his subordinates charged, the room quaking due to their massive footsteps.

"God, I didn't think he'd ever stop talking," said Lisa in what Renji thought was a surprisingly sunny tone given they were about to die.

"Yeah, but now we've gotta deal with them. You ready for this?"

"I'll take the two dozen on the left. You can have the two dozen on the right."

Smirking, Renji replied, "Yeah, you would've fit right in back when I was still with the Eleventh Division."

A colossal and ugly Arrancar was only moments away from pouncing. The two stood shoulder-to-shoulder, ready to rock and roll.

A random, blue arrow felled the beast in their stead. They braced themselves as it landed with a huge crash, the room swelling with thick smoke. Alarmed, Szayelaporro turned toward the projectile's source.

"You Arrancar were careless not to make the inside of this castle out of sekkiseki. I can easily sense spiritual pressure that's even this deep down."

From a smoldering hole in the wall stood Uryuu Ishida. He grinned down at all the panicked Fracción pointing at him.

"What's the matter, Renji Abarai? It looks like you're having a rough time of it!"

Renji almost thought himself imagining things. "You're…Ishida?!"

"Seriously? Don't tell me you showed up at this exact moment for dramatic flair or something, kid," said Lisa, grinning.

Uryuu pushed up his glasses and answered, "I wouldn't do anything of the sort. I was only attempting to—"

A tremendous roar cut him off. He saw that the Arrancar he shot wasn't quite dead. Once it got back up, it wasted little time in aiming its huge fist at Renji and Lisa.

A second,scarlet arrow pierced the creature's skull and finished it once and for all.

"If you're going to talk everyone's ears off, my dear Uryuu, perhaps make sure your enemy is dead."

From another hole came Sasune Ishida, who lowered his bow. Szayelaporro's Arrancar whipped themselves up into even bigger fervor, some weeping over their fallen brother. Sasune aimed his weapon at them next with the intent of shutting them up.

However, Uryuu scowling at him prompted him to say, "Is something the matter, little bro?"

"I've got this, Sasune. Why don't you just watch and learn?"

Sasune snorted. "That's funny. Your marksmanship needs some work from the looks of it. How about you just sit back and watch me?"

"I'm not in the mood to argue with you, idiot!"

"How can you talk to your own flesh and blood like that? I swear, our father raised you to be a savage. Thank God my mother was a saint."

"Please stop talking."

"Both of you can shut up already!" Renji shouted, shaking his head in contempt. "What the hell is even happening?"

"I dunno, but it doesn't feel like we're being rescued anymore," Lisa admitted.

"You know what? I'm going to pretend you aren't there, Sasune." Uryuu went back to observing the rowdy mob below. "This is funny. We've actually found creatures louder and more obnoxious than you."

Forcing a smile, Sasune snarled, "Alright, now you're pushing it. Can we just get this over with? All of those loudmouths down there feel like small fry, so—"

A fearful, trembling voice interrupted him. "A-A-A-Are things going well out there, Uryuu? Are they cowering at your miraculous entrance?"

Haughty laughter escaped Sasune in bunches. "Indeed, Pesche Guatiche! Come from behind that pillar and join me in this glorious moemnt!"

Pesche did so, and the two filled the whole room with their obnoxious chortling. It gave the cringing Uryuu a headache.

"Don't shoot them. Don't shoot them. Don't shoot them…"

"SILENCE!"

Szayelaporro's voice resounded across the area, shutting up both friend and foe. Huffing in a fit, he regained his composure and then pointed to the Quincies.

"Our new guests clearly have a lot to say, so we should allow them to finish speaking. It's common courtesy, after all."

Shrugging, Sasune retorted, "Uryuu is clearly the one who loves talking, so I think I'll let him take the wheel."

Uryuu scoffed. "That's rich. You're the guy who talks to his own reflection every morning the bathroom because you can't stand not hearing your own stupid voice."

"T-That's a lie, and it was never proven in court!"

"…I'm done talking to you." Uryuu meant it this time, going back to Szayelaporro. "You're an Espada then?"

"Indeed. I am Szayelaporro Granz, the Octava Espada."

"…I see. Only eight then." A smile spread across Uryuu's lips. "Excellent. That doesn't sound too strong of a number."

Sasune got a good laugh out of the slight. Szayelaporro seemed just as humored strangely.

"You are correct. I'm rather weak. Of course, my level is still far beyond your own."

No longer finding the situation funny, an annoyed Sasune replied, "So, do all of you Arrancar joke around like this? Say, what kind of shampoo do you use to get such beautiful, pink hair? Your boyfriend must love it."

"Hmph. The only jealous one, I think, is you. Don't fret, human. Not many share my beauty."

Sasune gritted his teeth at Szayelaporro's smug face. "I'm trying to insult you, numb nuts!"

"Don't worry, Uryuu!" shouted Pesche just then. "I got that one! Well done!"

"…Thanks, idiot."

"Who are you exactly?" wondered Szayelaporro. "You talk quite a bit, don't you?"

"Me? Heh." Sasune thumbed at himself. "You can call me the world's greatest Quincy!" He pointed at Uryuu and added, "And that's just Uryuu. …I'll be nice and call him number two."

With a vein throbbing on his forehead, the so-called number two Quincy snapped, "If you're trying to get me to shoot you, Sasune, you only had to ask."

The two forgot all about their beef once they got a load of Szayelaporro's sudden and crazed countenance.

"Did…I hear you correctly? You two are Quincies?" He cackled maniacally at such unexpected but splendid news. "And here I thought you rare breed had all but perished at the Shinigamis' hands! First a Bankai user, then a Visored, and now a pair of Quincies! If I were Yammy, I'd be shouting 'Suerte!' at having such good fortune!"

"O…kay?" Sasune twirled his finger around his ear. "This guy is a few colors short of a full box of crayons."

"For once, we're of the same mind. I think I agree with whoever this Yammy fellow is too. Being up against an opponent that leaves himself so full of openings makes me want to shout 'Suerte' myself."

By the time Szayelaporro whirled around, Uryuu had already fired a Seele Schneider. The glowing sword pierced the Octava Espada's neck. Wobbling, he dropped to his knees, his expression frozen in total surprise.

"M-Master Szayelaporro!" several of his horrified Fracción cried.

Renji blinked. "W-We could barely scrape the guy, but he kills him in one hit?!"

"Yeah, that was a little too easy," Lisa noted, worry painting her tone.

"Oh, come on!" Sasune landed near Uryuu, steaming like a vegetable. "How come you always take the good parts? I didn't get to show off any of my sweet moves!"

"Whatever you were planning probably would've gotten us killed."

"Hey!" Sasune lifted a finger to argue, but then thought the matter over. "No, you're right. You know I like to—"

He held that thought and almost swallowed his tongue. Alongside Uryuu, they watched as the Seele Schneider in Szayelaporro's neck suddenly shattered like glass.

"Yep, saw that one coming," said Lisa.

"A warning would've been nice then!" snapped Sasune.

Not only was Szayelaporro not dead, he went back to laughing his head off.

"They would've never understood my genius, Visored, without seeing it in the flesh! Ah, but those idiotic looks! They're priceless! You're such a fool, Mr. Quincy! Did you really think an attack from the likes of you would leave me any lasting harm? 'It went right through his vital point!' That's what you thought, isn't it?!"

Sasune tensed up when the Octava Espada aimed a finger at him.

"You. You presumed your fight against Loly Aivirrne went unnoticed?! I've already analyzed all of your abilities from when you fought that whore!"

"Bullshit!" Sasune hollered. "I only just got through fighting her before I came here! There isn't a chance you could've come up with a countermeasure for my Seele Schneider!"

"But I did! No one but me could have done so because I am Hueco Mundo's top researcher! I am the only one who could have—"

"Licht Regen!"

Sasune fired a wealth of arrows. He felt any sane person would at least attempt to dodge. Szayelaporro didn't, and it made sense when all the arrows burst apart before having the chance to rip him to shreds.

"…Perhaps I didn't make myself clear, Quincy. None of your abilities will work in this room because I have sealed them. It's pointless."

Sasune, blind with anger, lowered his now useless bow.

Dammit! That probably means my silver tubes and even Vollständig won't work!

"Wake up already, Sasune!"

Uryuu had to shove his brother out of the way of a Fracción's punch. The two spilled to the floor, with Uryuu quick to pull Sasune up.

"Pay attention! This is all your fault, so you need to pull your weight!"

"H-Huh?! That's not fair! How was I supposed to know this asshole had me on Candid Camera?!"

"Maybe if you weren't showing off and using every technique at your disposal—"

"Okay, that's really not fair! Yeah, I'll just sandbag every fight from now on and wait until I'm about to die before I start trying! Why don't I make speeches about friendship while I'm at it! What, you think I'm some stock shounen hero?! You wouldn't even care if I died, would you?"

"…"

"Y-You bastard! You really don't care, do you?!"

The Ishida siblings dodged another attack, splitting up. Uryuu dove to the right and pointed his bow at the colossal Arrancar. He fired on instinct, only to have his arrow fizzle out right as it would have connected. He smacked his lips.

"Quite slow, aren't you?" an amused Szayelaporro said. "I'll do you a favor and make it easier for you to remember."

Much to his bewilderment, Uryuu watched his bow shatter. That left him wide open when faced with the Fracción's fist.

Renji and Lisa darted in front of him and obstructed the blow with their Zanpakutou.

"Guh! Looks like these guys have been eating their vegetables!" remarked Lisa, grimacing.

"Is there ever a time when you don't joke around?!" an exasperated Renji asked her. He leered at Uryuu and shouted, "Stop standing there looking so stupid! Strategizing is your specialty, right?! Tell me there's some way to beat this bastard's tricks!"

"Or at least a way for us to kick him in the balls and run?"

"I don't know about that," Uryuu replied, smiling, "but there's no 'trick' that's flawless. Leave it to me!"

"…What am I, chopped liver?" grumbled Sasune.

"I don't care who gets us outta this mess, just hurry it up!" Lisa ordered. She and Renji managed to shove the Arrancar back, allowing them to catch their breaths.

"Uh…r-right! Not to worry, my fair lady. I, Sasune Ishida, will—"

"Nobody cares!" Renji voiced. "Look, lady, these two are tough bastards. We can trust them with this. …Just don't screw up, alright?"

"Get a load of this, Uryuu." Sasune chuckled. "A Shinigami is telling us what to do."

Equally humored, Uryuu replied, "It appears so. If everyone does their part, there's nothing to worry about."

"I don't really like the sound of that," said Lisa with a frown. "Call me crazy, but you're about to ask Abarai and I to stall that freak, aren't you?"

"Glad I don't have to explain. Can you handle it?"

"If it's the two of us," said Renji, "then maybe thirty or forty seconds tops. We probably ain't gonna be able to do much damage to him though."

"It's fine. I think I could brew a pot of tea and finish coming up with something with that much time."

"Smartass," quipped Lisa before sprinting ahead.

Renji was hot on her tail. "Forty seconds!"

"You sound confident." Sasune told Uryuu. "This plan of yours must be good."

"…I'm still working out the details."

Sasune thought that might have been a joke until he could see sweat coating his brother's forehead. It led him to panic too.

"Wait." Szayelaporro held out his hand to stop his antsy minions from attacking. Smirking, he remarked, "I would like to see what they've come up with."

"Follow my lead," Lisa told Renji, springing into the air before he could ask what she meant.

"Maniac…" he muttered, doing as asked in spite of smacking his lips.

"Oh?" Szayelaporro remarked. His head followed Lisa, who dropped toward him.

"Way of Binding Number Twenty-One," she stated, "Red Smoke Escape."

A glowing ball of crimson energy spawned between her fingers. She chucked it at Szayelaporro, who made no effort to dodge. The Kidou hit the floor, and he raised an eyebrow at the suffocating cloud of smoke rising from it.

"Such a mundane diversion…"

So much so that he didn't even have to lift his head to block Lisa's supposed surprise attack from behind. She shoved her sword against his to no avail.

"Is this the result of all your strategizing? How disappointing."

A wide-eyed Szayelaporro changed his tune when Renji emerged from the haze, grabbing the Arrancar by the collar. In the next instance, Zabimaru coiled tightly around the two of them.

"And this is…?" wondered Szayelaporro, who was almost nose-to-nose with his captor. "Sorry, but I'm really not into whatever it is you're trying to do."

"Shut up!" Renji barked, referring to the tittering Lisa. Holding her bloodied nose, she gave him a thumbs up. "Whatever you're thinking, lady, ain't right! This is strategy! Strategy!"

"I believe you," she assured him.

Her deadpan tone led Renji to growl. "I'm telling you that I'm—"

"This comedy routine of yours is growing dull," Szayelaporro said. "Would someone like to fill me in on this so-called 'strategy?'"

He got another start at Lisa now standing a fair distance away, aiming her palm his way.

"Sorry if this hurts a little, carpet guy. Hacchi told me what to do…but I wasn't really listening at the time."

Renji gave her a wide grin, replying, "Hit me with your best shot!"

"Suicidal, I see. Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Now then, how did it go?" Lisa took a few moments to gather her thoughts ahead of saying, "Sprinkled on the bones of the beast. Sharp tower, red crystal, steel ring. Move and become the wind, stop and become the calm."

Finally getting the gist of her muttering, Szayelaporro said, "More Kidou?"

He already had no interest in anything she had to show him, so he began wrenching on his restraint with all his might. Much to his shock, however, Zabimaru wouldn't budge. That came as a great delight to its partner.

"You were right to say I couldn't beat you with my Shikai alone," said Renji. "I doubt I could just beat you to death with my bare hands either. This is different though. Even with all your power, I'd bet it'd hurt like hell if you got hit point-blank!"

A sense of dread washed over Szayelaporro. His head shot back over to Lisa, where he could feel her spiritual pressure skyrocketing.

"The sound of warring spears fills the empty castle! Way of Destruction Number Sixty-Three—"

"I ain't never been good at Kidou," Renji added, "but it's clear that crazy lady knows a thing or two. You're gonna regret not killing her when you had the chance!"

Szayelaporro, as white as a bedsheet, roared, "Imbecile! She'll kill both of us!

Renji's mad smirk widened. "You think? I don't know about you, but that's a gamble I'll gladly take!"

"Thunder Roar Sear!" shouted Lisa at the height of her voice. The massive burst of electricity she fired howled as it stormed toward its incapacitated victims. She braced herself from the ensuing detonation, her eyes widening at the level of destruction. "Might've…actually killed both of them…"

He didn't want to believe it. The blistering pain couldn't be real. Szayelaporro crawled his way out of the subsiding smoke and hacked up a fair amount of blood. Although covered in the stuff, he was still alive by some miracle. His violently quivering eyes settled on the unmoving Renji, who was in equally bad shape. Just looking at him sent the Octava Espada into an uncontrollable rage.

"You will pay!" he spat at Lisa, struggling to breathe. "Do you hear me?!"

Despite his threat, he staggered to his feet and limped away from her.

"Huh. Looks like you were right for once, Uryuu."

Szayelaporro froze at the sudden remark.

"You mean like always?"

"What? I knew he'd do that too."

"No, you say he'd go after her."

"I mean, wouldn't you if she messed you up like that?"

"…Fair enough."

Szayelaporro saw that it was Uryuu and Sasune that busied chirping away. Alarmingly, he could have sworn they were waiting for him. Sasune began clapping as if answering that very fear.

"Congratulations. You've just played yourself."

Uryuu, holding a Seele Schneider, added, "I believe I've gotten a firm grasp of your mindset, Espada. Regardless of whether that surprise attack succeeded, you would likely distance yourself to regroup. You have a habit of underestimating your opponents, so it's not surprising you would put yourself in a position to avoid another attack to make sense of the circumstances."

Szayelaporro forced a smile. "And your point? Your little scheme failed. I'm still alive if you haven't noticed! Besides, you too, Quincy, seem to enjoy plotting from a cowardly distance."

Without warning, Sasune started laughing hard enough that the clamor reverberated across the huge chamber.

"Laying it on thick, aren't you?" Uryuu complained.

"Sorry, I just can't help it." Sasune got the last of his snickers out. "This loser really thinks that was our master plan."

Despite his best efforts, he chuckled some more. The assurance in his mocking clamor concerned Szayelaporro.

"You're giving me a headache." Uryuu twirled his Seele Schneider with confidence. "You're right about one thing though, Sasune. If he really does think that's all we had in store for him, he's underestimating us again."

He stabbed his energy blade into the floor. That led Szayelaporro to finally notice theotherSeele Schneiders encircling him. The floor glowed, and a Quincy pentagram formed under his feet.

"I-Impossible!" he cried, looking on as Uryuu held a silver tube. "Your powers should be sealed!"

"Maybe, but you're an idiot if you think you've seen all my tricks," Sasune informed him. "This one is called Sprenger. I never used it when I fought Ms. Aivirrne. Don't bother committing the name to memory. You won't live long enough to do so."

"That just goes to show you that there are things that even someone like you, Espada, know nothing about," said Uryuu with a ton of self-assurance. "Just so you understand, I'll use your own language. Hasta aquí, Szayelaporro Granz."

"Oh, shi—"

Uryuu spilled the contents of his silver tube just as Szayelaporro opened his mouth. Both Quincies stood by as the Sprenger spawned a soaring energy pillar where its target stood.

"M-Master Szayelaporro!" cried one of the Espada's minions. It and a herd of others rushed past the Ishida siblings to check on their creator, all fearing the worst. With them out of the way, Uryuu and Sasune stumbled upon Pesche Guatiche and Dondochakka Birstanne. At least, they thought the two Arrancar sticking miserably out of some rubble were Nel Tu's older brothers.

"Are…ya'll dead?" wondered Sasune, poking Pesche's seemingly lifeless form. He nearly had a heart attack when both Hollows suddenly popped their heads out of the debris.

"Uryuu!" cried Pesche indignantly. "Are you telling me you didn't see all those Hollows trying to kill us?!"

"Oh? Was that what all the screaming was about?"

Dondochakka loosed a torrent of tears, shouting, "That was horrible! I was so scared! Know what I'm saying?!"

Without warning, a livid Pesche took firm hold of Sasune's shoulders. "Now look what you've done! Uryuu, you heartless bastard!"

The real Uryuu pointed to himself. "What do I have to do with anything?"

"Quiet, Ichigo! I'm giving Uryuu here a piece of my mind!"

"See? This is what I've been dealing with while you were gone," Sasune, snorting, informed his bewildered brother.

"By the way," Pesche added, "what was that incredible technique just now? Ichigo, I didn't know you had such strength!"

"…Who in the hell are you calling 'Ichigo?'" asked Uryuu, burning with a quiet fury.

"Hey! It wasn't all him! I helped set up some of those Seele Schneiders!" Sasune made perfectly clear.

Ignoring him, Uryuu said, "That was called Sprenger. Basically, it's a technique where you—"

Sasune snapped his fingers just then. "Damn. I just remembered something."

"…What?"

"I'm saying I just thought of something you should've told that asshole before burning him alive. 'You're terminated, fucker!'"

"…"

"Come on! Ah, damn! I should've said it."

"…"

"Oh, whatever, you uncultured swine."

"…I'm going to go check on the others."

Uryuu walked away shaking his head. Annoyed, Sasune made haste to catch up.

"You should've just done whatever that was from the start instead of leaving us all in suspense," Lisa joked when Uryuu crouched down to her. "Well, I guess I don't mind being bait after all. Nice work, kid."

"Well, it wouldn't have worked if I didn't have such fine allies."

Uryuu directed his comment at the panting Renji, the latter forcing some laughs.

"Flattery will get you nowhere with me."

"Oh? But my compliment was sincere."

"Yeah, and so was this lady not holding back." Sasune whistled as he took stock of Renji's grievous injuries. "Say. Who exactly are you, miss, to be able to use Kidou like that?"

"…Nobody important," replied Lisa.

"Huh? You do know that when you say mysterious stuff like that, it just makes people want to know even more?"

"Well, whoever she is," said Renji, "I'm glad she didn't hold back since—why the hell is your nose still bleeding?"

Lisa turned away from him in a hurry. "What do you mean?"

"Dammit! You're still thinking about when me and that freak were tied up!"

"…Only a little."

"Hey! Purge that image out of your god-damn—"

"Shit! SH-IIIIIII-IT!"

The furious outburst rang across the area and chilled the blood of those around.

"You're kidding…!"

It was all Sasune could think to say upon laying eyes on someone who should have been deader than dead.

Though covered in burns and hardly recognizable, Szayelaporro Granz was indeed alive. The sheer ire coating his expression made Sasune wonder if the Arrancar clung to life from spite alone.

Szayelaporro kept on muttering 'shit' with every labored breath he took.

"How…the hell could he be still be breathing after all that?!" questioned Renji.

"Indeed. The fact that he can stand at all is…something," said Uryuu grimly.

"Of course…I…can." Szayelaporro spoke in almost a whisper, as if the act of opening his mouth exhausted him. "Did I…not tell you that I…that I've c-completely analyzed your spiritual pressures? It matters not if I've never seen the technique before. It's still your energy behind it. By diffusing the impact, I can at least…I can…I…can…"

His head slumped over momentarily.

"Of course I can reduce the damage, you MISERABLE INGRATES!"

He took his unbridled anger out on one of his Fracción. He snatched the small creature by its round head and took a huge, messy bite out of it.

"What…the…fuck?" muttered Sasune, horrified by the sound of chewing and torn flesh.

Having devoured most of his subordinate, Szayelaporro let out a belch and stood by while his wounds steadily healed. Within moments, his once charred skin looked completely normal.

"H-Hey!" cried Sasune out of nowhere. "Did…all his power just come back?!"

"I'm…gonna pretend I didn't see that," a slightly pale Lisa stated. "Any idea what just happened?"

"Honestly, I'd rather not think about it," said Renji, disgust swelling in his tone.

Szayelaporro spat out the Arrancar's arm, leading a similar-looking creature to bounce onto the scene.

"Lumina?! Lumina!"

"Be quiet," Szayelaporro snapped. "I'll make you another one!" He then faced his shell-shocked foes, their deafening silence amusing him. "That was rather rude of me, wasn't it? Forgive me for showing you such a barbaric display. Oh? Didn't I mention my subordinates here are special? They're made from a regenerative medicine. Thus, by eating one, I can heal my wounds. That's the case because I made them that way."

The reality of his claim slowly washed over his adversaries.

"Y-You're…you're a damn monster!" Uryuu declared.

"…'Monster?' Don't you mean genius?"

While Szayelaporro checked himself over, Lisa said, "This ain't good. If he's telling the truth, he'll just shrug off whatever we throw at him. We should focus on taking out his cronies."

"Easier said than done. None of us are exactly at full strength right now," replied Sasune, snarling under his breath. "Not to mention Abarai here is on death's door."

"I heard that, idiot," Renji managed to state in spite of yearning to pass out. "I…I can still fight!"

"All I'm saying is that someone would need to watch his back."

Lisa answered, "What happens after that then? We still have the problem of a pissed off Espada trying to kill us."

"I'm aware! Lemme…lemme think for a minute!"

"Calm down. There's a way out of this. …There has to be," said Uryuu. Renji noted the concern wracking the Quincy's visage, which couldn't have been a good sign.

Szayelaporro answered that concern in a totally unexpected way—abruptly turning his heels and walking away.

"H-Hold it!" Uryuu cried. "Where do you think you're going?!"

Raising an eyebrow, Szayelaporro replied, "Isn't it obvious? There's no way I can fight like this. This shabby appearance would leave me too distracted. A change of clothes is in order, I think."

"Is…is that a joke?" Sasune wondered. He would have never thought an Arrancar of all things would be a fashionista.

"Don't say anything more." Szayelaporro held up his hand. "The only reason I need to change in the first place is because you fools ruined my clothing. Therefore, you should just shut up, wait, and thank your good fortunes. Why not use this time to come up with your next strategy? Even simpleminded beings such as yourself can do that much, right?" He used the ensuing silence to point a stern finger their way. "Because I'll be thinking about how grotesquely I'm going to butcher you."

He left them with those haunting words.

"He's…actually gone," said Sasune breathlessly. "What a freak. Why do I get the feeling he's the type of asshole to stare at himself in the mirror for an uncomfortable amount of time?"

"Speaking from experience?" Uryuu retorted, smacking his lips.

"…"

"Let's get out of here." Lisa said swiftly, so much so that her allies leered at her in confusion. "There ain't a pot of gold waiting for us if we beat him, right? Then there's no reason to stick around."

"Agreed," said Renji, though it hurt his pride to admit. "At the very least, we need to get the hell outta this room. That way, even if that freak shows up again, we can use our powers again."

"No," said Uryuu immediately. "That's probably impossible."

"Yeah, if he's that confident we'll be here when he's done playing dress up, that means we probably can't leave that easily," Sasune clarified.

"What, we just sit here and wait for him to come back and kill us?!" spat Renji.

"I guess we really should think of something amazing. Hopefully, that freak is a picky dresser. Maybe he'll find something to match his pretty hair," said Lisa, garnering another of Renji's bewildered glances. "Just trying to lighten the mood, I guess. No good?"

"…You're unreal, lady."

#

Aaron couldn't take it anymore. The endless hallways. The narrow, winding staircases. All the white burning the back of his eyes. Clenching his teeth, he wished he could simply burn Las Noches to the ground and be done with it. No matter where he, Nel, and Hiyori went, they could find no trace of their allies. As much as he worried about their well-being, he now thanked his common sense for listening to Hiyori's advice and not doubling back for them. He no doubt would have ended up even more hopelessly lost.

"Nel, is there anything strange about this place? I'm starting to think us being this clueless isn't an accident."

"Nel dons't knows. Only the 'Spada are usually allowed in heres…"

Aaron nodded and then checked around for what felt like the hundredth time.

They can't do something insane like move the hallways around…right?

"Ugh! I'm sick of this freakin' place!" yelled Hiyori, vocalizing his frustration succinctly.

"Nel is gettin' dizzy…"

"Me too, kid. Couldn't they have picked any other color while decorating this dump?"

"Isn't all the sand outside the castle white too?" asked Aaron, suddenly feeling exhausted with the lack of progress. "I thought you'd be used to it, Nel."

"…Nel had Pesche, Dondochakka, and Bawabawa to pway with though. She…never really noticed…"

"Yeah…I guess that's true. It's okay, Nel. They're alright. …Everyone has to be alright."

Quietly, Aaron wasn't sure he believed that himself.

"We gottta keep moving," said Hiyori. Her piercing stare threw him for a loop. "You know that, right? The reason we split up in the first place was so that—"

"Yeah…so that we'd have a better chance of getting to Izumi. I know. …I know. We gotta keep moving. Just a little lon—"

Upon turning a corner, Aaron came dangerously close to crashing into someone. He stopped on a dime and wrapped his fingers around the hilt of his Zanpakutou.

Another Arrancar wasn't who stood opposite of him. His awestruck visage promptly matched the person he stumbled upon.

"A-Aaron?!" cried Izumi, pointing at her brother as if he was a mirage.

"…Izumi?" Aaron blinked several times. His sister remained no matter how little sense that made to him. "Wait, how did you—"

He lost his train of thought when she threw her arms around him. The way she squeezed made him feel as if she would never let go. Though still reeling, he managed to lift his numb arms enough to hug her back. Unable to ward off his tears, he slammed his eyes shut, hoping and praying he really wasn't losing it.