Boo!


Group therapy was to begin, they all sat and waited patiently in their cells for the inevitable hell that would be group therapy since it always was. The only good thing now days was the fact that there was no Joker around, he always made group therapy ten times more hellish and it usually ended with a riot and someone always got hurt and put in solitary and annoyingly it wasn't the pasty faced annoyance that started it off in first place by talking that ended up in solitary or the infirmary.

"I hate group therapy," Edward growled and Jonathan rolled his eyes.

"Everyone hates group therapy," he muttered back.

Garfield shrugged. "What's even the point of it?" he yelled across the hall and Drury poked his head out from the bottom bunk.

"It's meant to help with our rehabilitation into society," he cried with a bright grin on his face as Garfield narrowed his eyes.

"No one likes a know it all, Drury," he snapped. "Just ask Edward."

"Hey!"

"Oh don't listen to him Riddles," Harley cried from down the hall. "Me and Red like ya, don't we Red?"

Ivy raised a slender eyebrow. "If by 'like' you mean I would like him to be mulch then yes, I suppose I do like him."

Harley was silent for a moment before she cried back up the corridor. "I like ya Riddles!"

"Child you like everyone."

"That's not true!"

"Name me one person you don't like."

"Batman!"

Shark rolled his eyes. "That doesn't count, we all hated him."

"I didn't hate him…" Kirk whispered from his cell as he listened to the conversation.

"No offence Kirk, but you don't exactly count," Otis explained.

"Why not?"

"Good sir," Jervis beamed from his cell across from Kirk. "You are not a fully fledged rogue like the rest of my wonderland band here," he gestured to the rest of the hall. "You still haven't fallen down the rabbit hole."

Kirk raised an eyebrow. "What…?"

"He means that you haven't gone insane and don't kill people. The fact that you can't understand him shows you that you've not lost it," Edward explained before frowning. "And the fact that I can understand him is now concerning," he turned to his cell mate. "Jonathan, in your professional opinion, am I insane?"

Jonathan didn't even look up from his book. "Would you like constructive criticism?"

"Can you do that with someone's psyche?"

He nodded.

"Okay shoot."

"Yes."

Edward blinked. "What?"

Jonathan finally looked up now. "Yes, Edward, you are insane."

"I… what… that's not constructive criticism!" Edward yelled.

Crane frowned and tilted his head to the side. "Really… it took me a while to construct it in a way that would not criticise you as much as I could."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean!?"

"You built a robot army," Garfield deadpanned.

"So?"

"And a giant metal exo-suit," Drury whispered from his bed.

"And?"

"Eddie, you fitted it with a laser," Harley cried from down the hall.

"What's your point?"

Jonathan stood up and walked over to Edward. "Our point is that you're insane, I'm insane, we are all insane!" he snapped. "Except for Kirk," he looked at the man in question. "He hasn't been here long enough yet."

"I thought I could cure deafness by splicing my DNA with that of a vampire bat," Kirk deadpanned. "Does that sound anywhere near like what a normal scientist would do?"

Jonathan blinked owlishly at him. "You're probably asking the wrong person."

Just then the guards came into the corridor, one guard for each inmate.

"Morning Kirk," Dave greeted as he unlocked his cell. "How you been?"

"Better thanks," Kirk smiled as he walked out of his cell, the other close behind him.

"Hey," Garfield cried. "How come your guard's nice to you?"

"Serial arsonist not ringing any bells, Lynns?" Edward growled.

"We just discussed that you are equally as nuts, Nigma so you can shut it."

They were lead through the corridors of Arkham, but Jonathan didn't know why, but he just got the odd feeling he, they, were being watched and… followed.

He looked around but couldn't see anything, so simply chalked it up to paranoia and maybe his medication getting to him and shrugged it off.

Once inside, each person was put in their seats and the guards left, leaving the group to themselves.

"Hey Warren," Garfield barked. "What's the bets this time?"

Warren White, the Great White Shark, had a betting pool in Arkham. The only thing people could bet was food, but sometimes the guards got involved in the bets and they could always be interesting.

Shark pulled out the little red betting book and flipped it open to the pages he wanted. "We have a 10-1 bet that this session will end early due to the Doctor becoming psychologically damaged, umm 2-4 bet that Kirk is going to mutate at some point…"

"Hey!"

Shark shrugged and waved him off. "Them's the brakes kid. Oh we have a 10-1 bet that Drury's gonna faint at least once this session."

"Hey!" Drury snapped.

"Again. Them's the brakes. Oh and we have…" Warren frowned. "A 10-1 bet that the Joker's going to come up and twist Otis's…. no Nigma's neck… I didn't write this… it's in green and the writing…" he looked closely at it before he held his ear to it. "The writing is laughing," he deadpanned.

The others stared at him before Harley leaned over to Ivy.

"What sort of meds they got old Sharky on again?"

"I swear they're laughing!" Shark cried as he leaned closer. "I can hear them."

Then out of no where the Joker's face, his entire head popped out of the book and stared right at Shark with a huge grin on his face.

"Boo!" he yelled and Shark screamed before he chucked the book as far away from himself possible, watching as the book yelled in the centre of the group.

The laughter was so loud that everyone could hear it now and they watched as the Joker quickly materialised in front of them.

"Hello kiddos!" Joker cried as he waved at the group. "Uncle J's back in town!"

"Puddin?" Harley went wide eyed. "Real Puddin?"

"Sorry Harl'," he grinned at her. "I'm only an astral projection now days, but it's a lot of fun, you can get away with so much! I can give people wedgies and they don't even know its me."

Jonathan narrowed his eyes at the ghost. "Why are you back here?"

"Back?" Harley echoed before she glared at Joker. "Why didn't you see me Mista' J?!"

Joker looked slightly paler. "Well… you were asleep…" he quickly came up with, smiling. "And I didn't want to wake my little pumpkin pie, you looked so very tired my dear Harley that I didn't wish to disturb you."

Harley smiled dreamily at him. "Aww Puddin' you're so thoughtful."

The universal eye roll was hard to miss.

"Still," Jonathan pressed. "Why are you back?"

Joker grinned at him. "I just missed you all so much! You with your spookiness and split persona, the crazy little guy with the hats, Eddie's OCDelightful death traps, Pams lovely venomous smile and of course!" he began to walk over to Kirk. "I have to get myself aquainted with the newbie."

Kirk gulped, wondering what in gods name that could mean. He had only ever seen this psycho on the news, he had no desire to see him up close ever. Alive, dead, a ghost, he never wanted to see Joker.

"Hey back off clown!" Garfield growled. "Leave Kirk alone."

Joker merely smirked. "Oh I'm sorry, I hadn't realised that you all had gone soft."

"What do you mean?" Edward growled.

"Well gee Riddles," Joker smirked as he glanced in Edward's direction. "It's not like you haven't gone soft is it? Remind me again, how far along is dear old Misty?"

Edward's mouth went dry and he sighted his jaw.

"Yeah," Joker smirked. "Wowza, three kids now ain't it? That is of course… nothing untoward happens to you darling mystery before she pops."

"Stay away from Mist," Edward growled in the back of his throat and Joker grinned.

"There's the Riddler I know and love! I thought'd you'd become extinct ever since you became a 'proud father', lets just hope the apple falls very far from the tree when it comes to your parenting skills."

Edward didn't say anything he simply glared.

"Anyhoo!" Joker clapped his hands. "Since I remembered how boing these group therapy sessions could be when I was in them, I can only imagine what they're like now I'm not. So," he grinned. "Your dear uncle J decided he would come and relieve you all of this mundane excuse for a therapy session and spice things up a bit."

"How're you going to do that Mista' J?"

Joker grinned. "Why Harley… how else?" he began to disappear, "A little bit of ghosting here and there never hurt anyone, now hush up, all of you! The shows about to begin…"


They had only been a quarter the way in the session before the Doctor went running out screaming much to the shock of the guards and rest of the staff, as all that could be heard from the group therapy room was laughter.

They were all laughing, even Scarecrow was laughing… hell Kirk was laughing as Joker suddenly appeared about doubled over.

"Oh.. did ya see.. did ya see the look on her face?!" he cried before bursting into a fit of laughter once more.

"Okay…" Garfield laughed as he began to cough and wheeze. "That was pretty funny."

"With the book and… and the chair…" Drury whispered between giggles before the room erupted into more laughter again.

"Don't… don't forget…" Edward leaned on Jonthan's shoulder for support. "Don't forget the glove puppet…"

Fresh laughter soon spurred up, the guards came in, staring at the odd scene of the rogues doubled over with genuine laughter, not a hint of crazy on them at all, just laughing because they were amused. They looked like they'd been hit by a whiff of Joker's laughing gas they were laughing that much.

"What should we do?" Dave whispered to his fellow guard, a veteran when it came to the service. Larry had worked at Arkham for 10 years and he'd never seen anything quite like this, but he had a fair idea on what to do.

He gently pushed Dave away from the door and reached for the handle as he continued to stare at the scene in front of him.

"I think…" he began before pausing as he thought he saw… no it couldn't be could it…? No, no way it was Joker, he was dead. "I think," he began again as he slowly began to close the door. "We shall leave them to it," he said as closed the door on the laughing rogues. "And we'll pick them up once they've calmed down."


Once the rogues had calmed down and they'd been taken back to their cells, Larry decided to stay over time. He was concerned if anything, I mean the Scarecrow had been laughing, that was never a good sign and he was veteran of Arkham, he had seen and survived every riot, every escape attempt and every take over, he knew he had to stay because this was concerning and besides, he could survive anything.

Once they'd calmed the Doctor down she spoke of books and chairs and glove puppets and a whole bunch of other things that didn't make any sense.

"And then the others started joining in!" she cried.

Larry frowned. "The others? Weren't they the ones who were doing this in the first place?"

The Doctor shook her head. "No, no. Not at first. It was him."

"Who?"

She gave him a look. "It was Joker."

Larry blinked and looked at the time. It was ten to nine. "I think…" he began carefully. "I think you've had a long day, why don't you go home okay?"

The Doctor hadn't argued. She'd left, almost ran out of the asylum.

Larry decided to do a sweep of the asylum, he wasn't even supposed to be here now, he was supposed to be at home, he was supposed to have been at home hours ago, but… he wanted to stay and make sure everything was okay.

He did his round. He checked on the rogues, all of whom were asleep, probably warn out from all the laughing they'd done earlier in the day. He did a quick sweep of the island, he even went into solitary and checked on the cells before finally coming to the Joker's cell.

He was scared to go in at first, before he shook his head and walked in, checked around the room and left, but was it just him or as he was leaving did he just hear laughter echo from the cell?

Larry looked back at the cell and stared at it for a bit before shaking his head. Nah, he was just hearing things.

He turned and began to walk again, but the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end and he could hear the laughter again.

He shook himself. It was just the wind and his mind playing tricks on him, nothing.

He lifted his hand and checked the time, it was 11:30 now.

Larry walked back through the many halls and corridors before stopping dead and staring wide eyed. No. No way. That was impossible.

Dave looked up and frowned as Larry came walking up to the desk and began to clock out.

"You're leaving?" Dave raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said you were staying for the entire night, not leaving until morning?"

"I'm going home," Larry muttered as he searched in his locker and picked up his bag and his jacket, leaving his guard gear in his locker.

"Oh, how come?" asked Dave.

Larry told in the corridor again and looked at his friend before he looked down the corridor to see the Joker, clear as day, standing there smiling at him, before he slowly lifted his hand and waved at him.

Larry stared for a while before turning on his heel and beginning to walk away, muttering behind his response.

"I need sleep."

THE END.


Note: Ghost Joker returned! I gotta admit, I had fun writing this, even though I do suck at writing the Joker, I find him really difficult to write for some reason.

Anyway, here we have it then, Ghost Joker: The Return. :D

Up next is the crew discussing who the Arkham Knight might have been :D Hopefully I'll be able to get Arkham Life finished completely this summer, only got 11 more stories to go and that's it! Pretty excited, though it will be sad to see it end, because I have had fun writing this set of stories, After Arkham is going to be so much more freeing and fun. New characters, new settings, new problems and of course new requests! Requests will open for After Arkham on the very first chapter, so guys get thinking of some requests, what do you see the rogues getting up to while they're trying to act like normal everyday citizens, while my OCs, the future rogues of Gotham begin to make a name for themselves? It's going to be hectic I know that much :D

On a side note, last time I said that Phosphorus was the Arkham Knight, I meant that he was in Arkham Knight, sorry about that, dyslexia kicked in and I missed out a word.

Anyway, see you in the next episode! :D