A/N Hey everyone, okay so first I'm going to address a few of my readers who have reviewed and messaged me about my warning about Character Deaths in my story. While I hope all of you stick around for my story I can understand that some of you simply don't want to read about your favourite Character's dying. While I know many of you want to know who is going to live and die I just don't want to reveal that yet, the entire reason is to hopefully create suspense. If I told you now who lives and dies it might not be as impactful in the story if you wait knowing its coming. I want you all to be overjoyed if a character manages to survive or sad when one doesn't. I can only say that this is a story centred around the pack fighting the Cullen's, Newborns fighting the Cullen's and potential more threats as the story goes on. I can't make any promises that all the Cullen's will survive. If you feel you can't continue I will both be saddened by that but understand. I'm on chapter Seventeen of my writing as of right now and I can safely say that hard times are all around now in my writing. War isn't something glorious, both sides suffer and in the end I don't think anyone truly walks away happy at the end of it. I just hope that there is enough in the story that you can enjoy those lighter moments and bear with me in the harder ones. Thank you all for being so invested and already caring for the character's that I'm trying to keep somewhat true to the books but also place my own spin on. You've been a great audience to keep me writing for.
I would just like to make another note, unfortunately I haven't heard from my Beta and I'm unsure if she will want to work on the story. I'm very grateful for all her hard work but I may need to find a new Beta. So if anyone out there is an experienced Beta and is willing to deal with my constant pestering to help me update faster for you guys shoot me a PM.
RED DAWN
SUMMARY: Edward had always warned Bella that the pack were dangerous. Hostile, volatile and aggressive in nature. She ignored him, testing even Edward's own vampire instinct by staying friends with his enemy, Jacob. One event will change them all, Bella never truly understood the supernatural world. Didn't understand the aggression that lay dormant even in her controlled mate until it was too late. Warning: Violence and Character death.
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all the Characters.
Chapter Seven
Edward had all but forgotten about any human near him when he'd gone to leave Bella's hospital room. He'd needed to get away so quickly he'd ran at full speed through the hospital. It had sent up a wind through the corridors. He'd been fortunate that he'd barely been a blur that no one noticed properly, seeing anything unusual other then papers being swept up behind the strange gust of wind. Edward had only stopped once he'd submerged himself into the thick trees around the hospital, far enough away to be a distance from her but close enough that he'd be near should she need him. He felt hollow. Felt like he'd been hit in his chest with something more infinitely powerful then even the few times Emmet had slammed into him during play fighting. It was almost exactly in key with how he'd felt in brazil, hiding in that attic starving himself wishing that death would come for him, that just something would come to stop the pain. He'd missed her so much, he'd needed to leave to keep her safe and yet he felt like he wasn't even a person without her. Tried so hard to hunt down Victoria of course he'd been no use tracking her in the state he'd been.
She'd pulled away from his touch, after so much that she knew about him and the ways he'd failed her she'd never once turned him away in such a way and then she'd pulled her hands away and he'd felt so much. He'd felt heartbroken that she'd reject him and then the anger. It was like he was waging a battle inside his very soul on what to feel and he didn't understand it for a moment. He wanted to just hold her in his arms, to kiss her and tell her everything was going to be okay but the more she spoke. The more she mentioned the dog the harder it became to keep in control. Words like accident and then when she'd all but said he'd never hurt her, lines she tied to him, lines that even he was seeing now he'd failed at. He'd killed her friends, he'd killed the boy who had been her everything when he'd gone, all this time he'd been so sure she loved him and only him. Suddenly the sickening feeling that perhaps that stupid manipulative mutt had been right, had there been something there between them. Was this why she was going to send him away now, she said she wasn't but he couldn't believe that. If she sent him away now after everything he'd done, it be for nothing.
He'd have killed for nothing and put his family in harm's way for no reason.
He'd be alone, he'd lose her and he'd be forced to stick to his promise because he'd vowed never to break his promise to her once he'd retuned. He'd sworn to her he'd stay by her side as long as she wanted him, the pain at the possibility of Bella never wanting him made him dry heave roughly as he gripped onto the tree.
The bark crumbled under his touch, yielding and groaning until the chunk fell away from the tree bark the large hand print where his fingers had all but gorged through. It only fuelled as a reminder of his destructive ways. Edward growled out in his own pain, the need to break something to make the pain that was tearing up at his own insides needing a visible and actual wound. He'd tear his own dead heart from his chest to show her how completely she owned him, he'd been a fool to send Carlisle out and he should have allowed Jasper the use of his gift from the very beginning. Bella still disorientated and weak and he'd blown up at her like a maniac he'd known she'd assume the best in all people. She saw the good in people and refused more often than not to see the bad. Now he'd just given her front row seat to sinister parts of him, now he'd be left waiting to know if he'd ever be able to fix what had been broken since he left her. They had been so happy before the night of the paper cut. He'd naively believed that they truly could be normal, even Bella had started treating him like he was no different than any other boy in love with his girlfriend.
Edward brushed away the shards of wood from his hands moving his long fingers into his hair and moaning out like a wounded animal as he tried to think of a way to fix this. What if she could never forgive him? How could he even begin to earn her forgiveness when the things he'd done he didn't regret or feel sorry for? He'd felt more remorse for taking the lives of criminals when he'd fed from human's then he had killing those dogs.
"She'll never forgive me" Edward pressed the heel of his palms into his eyes his shoulders trembling with the dry crying.
It was a strange and pitiful sight to see his body jerking as if he was crying like any human but he made no sound and his eyes never watered. Had he been human he'd be no different than Bella had been sobbing tears covering his face, Edward wasn't human though and he never would be not matter how much easier things would have been if he'd simply been just an average teenage boy.
"I don't need my visions to know that's not true Edward" Alice said gently.
She had stayed a distance away not wanting to get too close while he'd been trying to reign in his own feelings. It was becoming evident to all of Edward's family that the more instinctual side of Edward was being allowed for the first time in his long existence to simply just be part of him. For once not so tied down and restrained he was acting more human in their eyes at least or more like a vampire then they had ever seen. Finally seeming more alive than simply just existing in this second life he'd been given. He was showing emotions, the only concern they had though now was how to help him best understand it all without his constant need for lashing out. He'd unlocked his monster accepted that he was both man and monster now he simply had to find a balance. A balance they had to hope he could find and work with that didn't change him too drastically from the man they knew.
"You didn't see the way she couldn't even look at me. She pulled away from my touch, in all our time together she's never feared me but I knew in that moment she saw me for what I am" Edward kept his back to his sister his shoulders tense but his entire appearance screamed defeat. While he'd been slowly becoming this much more aggressive confident vampire one moment believing Bella no longer wanted him had reduced him to a similar state that he'd been during his time away from her.
"She saw you for a killer" Alice said in agreement but not in the way Edward would have expected of his sister.
"It's about time too. Bella and you have both wanted to pretend that you can run off into the sunset and live happily ever after like this is some fairytale. We're vampire's Edward. We resist the urge to kill every day, every second around human's we go against our very nature. You've always been a killer, always been a man who could kill. You have killed but you've never had a reason to kill for something. Those with the most to lose have to do the most to keep it Edward. We've been biding out time waiting for something to come. We always assumed it would be the Volturi but it isn't. It's Victoria, it's the pack, and it's the Volturi too. They want to take from us what we have" Alice said firmly, she'd taken Edward's word to each of them seriously she could see he'd been smart to see that he'd falter.
He'd asked them all to make sure he stood firm in what they had wanted, to stand firm even when he knew Bella may ask him to surrender and she knew right now he'd give up everything just to make her pain less. Even if it meant his own end, she needed to make him see that with time Bella would understand but to have time they had to survive against those who wanted them dead.
"Answer me this Edward. What is it that has you feeling so ashamed is it that you've killed or that Bella finally knows you've killed? You've told her you've killed but you've never really explained it too her. We all call it your rebellious period when you separated from the family but does Bella understand?" Alice asked and she knew that she was treading a fine line, while it had been true Edward had returned full of shame and guilt it hadn't been for the reason most had assumed it had been a dark secret Edward had only revealed to her.
His fear that he was becoming too judging that he was becoming too thrilled by his power, and how eventually taking even those who simply thought evil thoughts was enough of a crime to kill them for it. He'd seen it in himself and had enough control to flee to Carlisle and the family and force himself into submission to feed from animals.
"I killed criminals" Edward said his nostrils flared.
"You didn't just kill criminals Edward you decimated them. You single handed wiped out hundreds, thousands even of men and woman who did wrong in your eyes. Had you not returned when you had the Volturi would have come for you. You didn't just feed off criminals you killed them simply because you could, because in your eyes they were wrong and they deserved to die. It's always scared you knowing that you can know the innocent from the guilty. None of us have ever held that against you because we know it's your burden to bear. Just like Aro can see the rule breakers from the innocent you aren't any different Edward" Aro and Edward's abilities while very different were both also the same, being able to know someone's thoughts made you one of the only people who could truly judge them on their character and actions they'd taken.
You could know the motives behind actions, couldn't be lied to or manipulated by others. Mind readers could literally see the very depth of a person's soul.
"I'm nothing like Aro" Edward snarled angrily turning to face Alice.
"You aren't, while he's used his power to give him only more power you've tried to reject what you can do. You've never tried to allow it to develop even though we all know as the years have gone by you've only been able to hear the thoughts further and further out. Kate's proved that some of our kind's abilities can develop more, yours has even while you've tried to ignore it." Edward shook his head glaring at Alice, even though what she said was true he'd always treated his gift as a curse because of the dark world that he lived in.
The world of the mind had showed Edward only darkness even in the humans he resisted from hunting by keeping to his animal blood diet had so many darker shades then anyone would believe.
"What does this have to do with what's happening Alice. What does Aro and the Volturi have to do with Bella never being able to forgive me" Edward shouted at her.
"Because we need you. Carlisle is a wonderful man and father. He's the best of our kind but he can't lead us anymore. You may hate Aro but there is a reason why he desires you so much even with knowing of my gift he would sooner have you then me. We need you to lead. You standing out here doubting yourself, readying yourself to give up because your overreacting to Bella will get us all killed" Alice yelled right back at her stubborn overdramatic brother.
"She's all I care about. I don't want anything if I can't have her" Edward roared back at her, not a single hesitation behind his honesty. He'd turn even his family away to have Bella, he had always known he was selfish enough to do so.
"Then stop hiding who and what you are. You're so scared of her reaction you've hidden parts of you that she should know. Stop doubting her love when you know she's your mate. Do any of us love our mates less for what they've done? Do I love Jasper less for the countless lives he's taken? Does Emmet love Rose less in spite of her issues with this life? Do you love Bella less even though she betrayed you and went to La Push?" Alice challenged strongly trying to make her brother see both that he needed to be stronger for the family to live through what was coming and that he needed to have faith in Bella too. She was human but she was also his mate and if there was one thing that all of their kind knew that the mating bond was everlasting, it was unconditional.
"I just wanted..." Edward sighed looking down feeling the defeat sit heavily over his chest he was confused by not only what Alice was saying but her thoughts too.
She'd all but compared him to Aro, a man he'd viewed in his own mind as a power hungry tyrant that only desired to posses all those gifted in the world. He had to admit though that for a time in his life Edward had acted against the humans in a way that resembled Aro, he'd judged and executed as he saw fit. Not only to feed his hunger but simply because no one else would, he'd taken to the streets all across the globe ending the lives of evil doers believing he was created for the purpose. Just like Aro believed himself created to rule over the vampire kind. Was it really possible that mind readers were destined to eventually be corrupted to the power to see inside of others? Or had that simply been Aro's fate. Would it someday become his own? Carlisle had always believed that Aro had been right in his beliefs that the vampire's needed ruling over and in many respects Edward could understand that too. The quote running through Edward's mind on a loop, that power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.
"All you've ever wanted is to be human. In that respect you and Rose are the same" Alice moved towards Edward placing a hand on his cheek softly, tenderly.
"You've been alone and bitter for so long and you have Bella now. Even then you didn't feel worthy, that shows you're a better man then Aro. Aro never would have believed himself unworthy of anyone or anything that he wanted. I can't see much now, our lives are too entwined with the pack and too many choices are being made. We've got the pack and Victoria to handle but we both stood in that throne room in Volterra Edward. We both know Aro will come one day, he'll expect you to be no different still doubting, still hating silently. Bella will forgive you she'll love you even when she feels like she shouldn't. The second you left I saw a glimpse of her already calling you back. I'm not asking you to put the family ahead of your mate. You're a leader now, you stood against Billy and Sam and Carlisle stood at your side letting you lead. It's time you accept who you are, Carlisle will always be our father but it's time you take the position someone of your power was always destined to have" Edward shook his head still feeling wrong but knowing in many respects he'd already done it, hadn't he all but told Carlisle to leave if he couldn't handle it.
He'd been giving orders to his family from the moment he'd come back to them with Bella's injured body. Even when he'd realised he'd embraced his darker side and seen that he'd need to be a man he'd wanted to still stand behind Carlisle, in his mind. He couldn't now, his family needed him to stay firm or they'd die, Bella was the love of his existence. She'd not sent him away even though she'd hurt him by asking for time she'd clearly expressed she wasn't sending him away. Even as he'd screamed and shouted at her like a damn madman she'd not asked him to leave, she'd never said she'd hated him or called him a monster. She'd not sent him away even as he'd admitted to killing her friend, even in her shock and pain she'd not sent him away. Only asked for time.
"Thank you Alice" Edward said reaching up to squeeze her shoulder softly as she moved back away from him, shrugging nonchalantly like she hadn't just talked him off a ledge.
He still wasn't in complete agreement with some of her theories, he also didn't want to ever accept the possibility that he and Aro were ever to be one in the same. He respected that she believed he was the right one too lead the family though, even if it went against everything he'd believed because he loved Carlisle.
"We all need a wakeup call now and then" Alice said playfully with a grin, the heavy tension suddenly dissipating as if Jasper had been with them.
"You aren't always right. You have a horrible tendency to over react and over think, you'll learn. I've seen many visions of our future during my existence. I've always told you that my first vision was of Jasper and my second of you and the family. I never told you this because I didn't want to change anything. The vision was of you because you were the leader. I didn't see it at first you were so isolated and sad I couldn't relate the two versions of you. The one in my visions, and the one in front of my very eyes. We'll all stand by you, so will Carlisle even though he hates the idea of taking anyone's life from them. You'll be a good leader to our family. Bella was the final piece though I've known that since the day you walked into biology class. She'll always be the one to balance those darker parts of you, she'll learn too" Alice said seriously again as Edward watched in her mind the vision she'd seen in the first days when she'd awoken to this world completely blank to this world.
She'd seen the love she'd have with Jasper and then she'd seen Edward standing with his family but there was something so fundamentally different in that vision then he'd ever seen himself before. He looked relaxed, unburdened and truly happy as if part of him was literally glowing and his family looked to him with that same happiness reflected on his face.
"I'm still not sure if I completely agree. I know I can't doubt myself now...even with Bella upset. We can't undo what's been done and they'd come for us even if we didn't strike first. She'll forgive me?" Edward looked at Alice hopeful and almost boyish in his concern that Bella may not be able to look past it.
"Of course she will. She'd have to be blind not to see even in the evil we do we've done it for our family. You killed to protect her, you've also agreed to give her the one thing she's always wanted" Edward looked at her confused as she shook her head rolling her eyes at him.
"You've given her clear proof of your love Edward. You've agreed to change her without her needing to even try and force you into it. I don't think you've ever seen how desperate she's been to know that you want her forever" Edward nodded then smiling slightly at Alice because he had, he'd put aside his foolish insecurities and fears for her soul so that he could keep her forever.
Edward loved her, Bella loved him, they were mates and that was a bond that couldn't be broken Edward realised. Not even by bloody hands, and the sins of his past.
"I'm still nothing like Aro" Edward said as Alice giggled at him, slipping her arm into the fold of his elbow pulling him along with her.
Edward would still fear Bella's rejection of him. That couldn't simply be forced away but he knew that they were mates, he'd never heard of any mates separating other then through death. He had to have faith in their love and that Bella with enough time would see that there had been no choice, he'd had to save her and to save her there had been deaths. He'd started a war with the help of a foolish boy with anger issues and now he'd have to kill to protect everything he held dear. He'd need to be the leader Alice had always believed he'd become. It was time to grow up and start to believe in himself.
Bella had tried her best to get control of her crying around Jasper and then had seen Esme and Carlisle, seeing both of them had of course resulted in more tears. Esme had been perfect as she'd taken up the seat Edward had previously held taking her hand and holding it tenderly as then Bella listened to everything that had happened during the two days since her accident. They'd explained how Edward had come to the Cullen home cradling her in his arms her blood covering him as he'd come to Carlisle screaming his name for help. She'd listened as they'd not left out a single bit of information. Edward's anger that she'd gone against her word and his own anger that the pack had even dare come between them when she'd needed him. Carlisle had explained the phone call from Old Quil and his choice between being at war or letting them have Edward. Carlisle seeing if they could somehow have peace but Edward's life would be forfeit.
Then she had to listen even carefully as Carlisle had explained what Edward had found in Billy Black's mind when Sam and he and confronted the Cullen's in the hospital car park. The pack had been covering up accidents since the beginning. In Billy's anger and mourning he'd revealed the darker side that even Bella was shocked to find out about.
Jake being a killer.
When he'd been so cruel about the Cullen's being monster and he'd hurt people with his own anger, she'd not been the first. She found out the truth about Harry Clearwater and Leah and how it had been his own daughter who had caused her father's death. She'd always known the pack to be far too proud and prejudice against outsiders. They despised the Cullen's completely even though they hadn't done anything wrong, and didn't drink from humans. The pack had broken their own vow to protect human life and they'd not cared if they were hypocrites.
Billy had even outright made it clear he'd wanted Bella to pay alongside Edward for what had happened to Jake. Her father's best friend didn't care that his son had almost killed his friend's daughter as long as Jake was okay. Bella had felt so much anger hearing each part of it, anger that they'd dare to speak so horribly of every member of the Cullen family. Found it almost intolerable that she'd been a stupid fool and not stood to defend them more. She felt like an idiot that she hadn't even known the person she'd considered her best friend, all while she listened to the damning story of the pack the words Edward had spoken to her about her friendship came back to her.
Edward had told her cruelly and harshly that Jake had never been her friend. They always said that the truth often hurt the most, and the reality was that Edward would know Jake's own mind better than anyone else. For all the times Jake had accused Edward of brainwashing her she'd been the only one safe to hide secrets from Edward, she'd abused that with her constant going to La Push. It had been Jake though who had been trying to brain wash her, make her believe his own lies, he'd wanted her to see the monster in the Cullen's and in the end she'd been the victim to his type of monster.
Edward had known all along, he'd seen every single twisted and warped lie Jake had tried to spin, he'd known from the very beginning that Jake's motives were never of friendship. She'd believed Jake to be innocent, a friend who had held her together when she'd felt broken. She'd used him to find ways to see her illusions of Edward and then felt guilty when he'd ended up hurt. Both Jake and she had lied to each other and been deceitful but she'd have never begrudged him his happiness had he found it, she'd hoped for it wanted him to be happy. Jake had hated her happiness though, he'd known what happened to her when Edward was gone he'd seen the result of the absence and yet he'd still wanted to take Edward away from her.
He'd have killed her soul mate and hoped she'd somehow be his, he was delusional because had he killed Edward she'd have ceased to exist there was no Bella without Edward.
Bella realised the truth in her own mind then as she sat there, there was no life without Edward even when he'd done things she believed wrong. Bella wouldn't live without him, she knew he could drink from humans and she'd still love him hadn't she told him when she'd found out what he was that it didn't matter.
It still didn't.
It mattered though, what Jake had done. He was her friend and he'd hurt her, but she'd have forgiven that. She wouldn't forgive him trying to take her happiness from her though. Bella couldn't live in a world without Edward but she could live without Jacob. It felt cruel and wrong to think that when her best friend had only died days ago but she felt the truth in her own thoughts. Jake died because he was a selfish delusional fool who thought if he could keep Bella even if he killed the man she loved. Edward had killed the man who risked all that both of them had wanted. She'd hurt him by keeping the friendship, she'd hurt him with her lies and hurt him again when he'd needed her to tell him it was okay. Edward loved her and because of that love the entire world was closing in on them. Victoria wanted her dead and had created an army to take Edward's happiness away. The pack wanted to do the same to her now and take Edward and her family.
Bella had tried to force two natural enemies to work together and accept each other, all while knowing one day she'd be one of them so her life would transition easier. It was selfish but even she saw the motives behind her own desires, Edward had accused her of keeping options ready for when she didn't get what she wanted. In some respects he'd been right. Even though Edward had returned he'd still not wanted to change her. Even when they'd voted for it to happen amongst his family he'd tried to compromise to gain more time with her human, in Bella's eyes it gave him more chance to leave her again. So she'd kept Jake in her life. She'd not trusted Edward so she'd flaunted the presence of another who made his desire all too clear, she'd punished him, she'd pushed him to the brink of his own sanity with her friendship with Jake. Now people were dead and more were going to die. She might as well have broken the treaty herself, she couldn't have been more involved in its demise had she tried.
Bella knew then that the fault for this belonged on her own shoulders. Not Edward's, but her own.
"We'll stick together" Bella had finally spoken allowed once Carlisle and Jasper were finished explaining it all to her, even the aspects of covering it up.
She knew the story that needed to be told and while Carlisle had advised Bella in playing the lack of memory card in her own part of the story; she knew she'd have to once again lie to her father. It was something she'd accept, something she'd have complained about before. Now it seemed pointless now. She'd wanted to be part of the family completely and now she'd been completely brought into it.
"What about the Denali's?" Bella had asked knowing that they'd come and that it hadn't ended well, that the pack had attacked them when they'd arrived in the area.
That Edward had taken Leah's life to hurt Sam and force the men to retreat. It still twisted and churned her gut, making Bella want to be sick. She wished that she could be stronger, she continued to whisper in her mind she could bear it as long as it wasn't Edward. The world could all die one at a time if she had Edward. It scared Bella more then she'd ever understand. She'd let everyone around her fall to keep Edward, it seemed so selfish that she'd place her love for him above everything and everyone else no matter the consequences.
"We'll explain what happened with the Denali coven. I'm sure you'll meet them soon enough but for now its best we tell you what you need to know. You should know this though Edward would want you to know. Sam has threatened your life after what Edward did he made it clear he'd harm you" Bella nodded looking at Jasper wide eyed as Esme stroked the back of Bella's hand her heartbeat had raised and all had heard that, Bella was scared.
"We'll all protect you" Esme said softly.
"Right now... Right now you have a very powerful mate who the pack fears, Sam will not be fool enough to try and take the only thing that keeps Edward somewhat restrained" Esme said honestly and even Bella was surprised by the way Esme spoke.
While it had been clear that Carlisle was very much against many of the things that had happened, Esme didn't seem nearly as conflicted by these things. The pack that had always been so arrogant and sure of what they could do had bragged about being able to kill them because they'd been born to, feared her mate. Edward made them scared and Bella couldn't help the excited thrill that shot through her, it seemed even now in her confusion the mating link was strengthening for her as it was for Edward. She felt embarrassed when she saw the knowing smile on Jasper's face. Jasper had been a pleasant surprise when Edward had left he'd been comforting and brotherly in a way she'd not expected, things had been strained since his almost slip on her birthday. Hopefully with time she'd be able to fix that.
"Is Edward safe out there? I've... he was upset we...I don't want him to get hurt" Bella stuttered over her words feeling herself getting emotional again.
"Edward's close by. Alice is with him. He's been ready to blow up ever since Alice saw your future go black" Bella nodded at what Jasper said, it seemed that there had been an argument coming between them even before Jake had harmed her.
"She'll talk him down. He'll give you time Bella. I have to insist though that you let us still watch over you. You are our most vulnerable member and I don't trust the pack not to use you as a leveraging chip against Edward. We've all come to see the ends that Edward will go to have you safe now and none of us wish to see it up close" Jasper continued and while Carlisle looked visibly ill at that he nodded in agreement.
Bella felt and believed that Carlisle may be the only one who truly felt anything close to her in how conflicted she was over what was happening. Her family and friends were at war and they'd kill each other before it was over, she had to make the choice on what was more tolerable. Then again there was no choice as she'd already known, Edward. Edward was always the choice she'd make, a hundred deaths and wars wouldn't change that, Edward was all she'd never realised she'd truly wanted. She'd been given Edward early in her life, he'd waited a century, and they wouldn't let anything come between them. Esme pulled her phone from her jacket as it beeped loudly then turned to smile at Bella and show her the phone.
"Your mother has just arrived with Rose and Emmet. We'll give you some time to get yourself in order. Charlie should be arriving soon too, they've both be very worried about you" Esme leant towards Bella kissing her cheek softly as Bella slipped her arm around Esme to hug her back.
Jasper exited the room with Esme, while Carlisle decided to stay behind explaining to his family members that he was confident that both Renee and Charlie would want to know that everything was okay. She couldn't help the nagging feeling that this wasn't the only reason for why Carlisle wanted to stay close to Bella though, as he looked at her strangely. Neither questioned him though as Carlisle moved around the bedside and took Bella's hand and looking into her eyes with a sad glint in his eyes.
"I'm sure you're very confused on what to feel with everything that has happened. I know you were close to members in the pack, I'm sorry for the loss of your friends" Carlisle said sincerely, he seemed just as torn up over the loss of members of the pack though even though they'd treated him with nothing but disrespect.
"I wish there was a peaceful resolution and I would certainly try to fix this if I knew that it could be done. I fear that we'll loss more than simple lives if this continues. I've tried talking with Old Quil as a way to try and find a more peaceful resolution. I've lived for so long to try and keep my family from making these choices but it seems in the end we can't run from our natures" Bella was surprised to see Carlisle so defeated and she wasn't sure why he was coming to her to speak about it, she was trying to strengthen her resolve and find it in herself to stand behind Edward and the family's choice and it seemed Carlisle was trying to make her doubt herself.
"They'd kill our family though. They'd sooner Edward die then ever let this go" Bella said finding that her words were confident, even though she was conflicted inside her own emotions confusing her not wanting anyone to be hurt or killed she knew that the pack would never be able to move past this. That Edward would never be safe, that she'd never be safe now.
"I'd hoped you'd see things the way I see them" Carlisle let go of her hand and she had the distinct feeling she'd somehow just failed some test with her answer and she couldn't honestly understand it. Carlisle was reacting strangely, this wasn't the man she'd known all along she wasn't sure what was wrong with him.
"I would give anything for people not to be hurt Carlisle. If I could think of a way to turn back the clock and never go to La Push I would do that so people didn't die and that Edward wasn't in danger. I can't though and I don't believe the pack will be able to forgive. Not everyone is as good a person as you Carlisle, not as compassionate as you are" Bella said sadly knowing the truth in what she was saying.
Edward had often told her how rare truly good people were. He'd considered Carlisle one of the best, he'd even said if any of the vampire kind had a soul he'd believe Carlisle one of them even though he'd never believed he himself had one. Carlisle had always been intended to be a healer never someone who took life, even from the beginning of his vampire existence.
Bella had thought that Carlisle would reply but instead he remained silent but evidently just as conflicted as her, she'd never realised the burden of the heightened feelings the Cullen's must feel. She'd always seen becoming a vampire as some type of gift to keep her immortal so she could be with Edward. He'd tried to explain all the hardships that came with it, but in her naivety she had wanted to brush it aside. She still wanted to be with Edward forever. It was however time she started acting maturely, and she couldn't keep treating this with rose tinted glasses. Even now something she'd once considered a gift that Carlisle was compassionate seemed a burden for him as he sat there in clear discomfort over what his family must do to protect themselves. Even when they were threatened by an enemy, his compassion spread to even them. Bella wasn't sure the pack deserved Carlisle's compassion though. Finally listening to the warnings given instead of believing the good in people, they'd covered up murders all while calling the Cullen family killers.
Just as Bella had begun to try and ease Carlisle concern or at least try, her mother had rushed into the doorway. Renee looked like she'd cried the entire way from Jacksonville, her eyes red and puffy. Bella had seen her mother and felt her own tears come then because she felt it was safe to just let her emotions out around her mother. She felt like a little girl again scared of the big bad world.
"My poor baby" Renee had rushed to Bella then wrapping her arms around Bella tightly and held Bella to her chest as she stroked her hair back as both woman cried into each other. Renee kissing at the top of her daughters hair and eventually they were left alone as Renee sat on the hospital bed cradling Bella to her chest caring for her injured daughter.
"It's okay Bella, mommy's here and she's not going anywhere" Renee tried to sooth her even in spite of her own upset, the sight of her daughter injured while wasn't new to her, had never been this bad. The two sat there holding each other on the hospital bed and then were finally interrupted by Charlie the rest of the Cullen family had left them to have time together knowing that with everything Bella had gone through she'd need her parents now more than anything they could offer to help her.
"Hey Bells. It's good to see you awake" Charlie said smiling with his watery eyes as Bella smiled at her father crying a little as she reached her hand out to him while she'd never usually been one for affection she felt needy for it now.
"I'm so sorry dad" Bella cried out unable to help the guilt she felt, his friends had lost children the woman he was seeing had lost a daughter and she didn't even know if he was aware of it. She felt so guilty for the pain her father would feel for everything that was happening and would continue to happen.
"Now Bella you don't have a thing to say sorry to me for" Charlie took her hand moving to her other side and kissing her forehead, she felt the tickle of his moustache against her forehead and smiled remembering times as a younger child and feeling that sensation when she was her father's little girl.
"He's right you have nothing to be sorry for sweet girl" Renee said shushing Bella from arguing as she leant back cupping her cheeks doing her best not to touch where the stitching was and her eyes tearing more.
"It's nothing, your still just as beautiful as you always were" Renee said matter of fact then turning to Charlie.
"That animal that did this I hope it's found and killed" Renee said with an anger that left Charlie speechless but it only upset Bella more, the animal that Renee was referring to was already dead. But he wasn't just an animal he'd been her friend Jake too. Or at least she'd used to believe they'd been friends.
"We should maybe talk about this later" Charlie said clearly trying to hide something but Bella was pretty sure she already knew that he was trying to conceal what had happened to the rest of them, those she'd supposedly been with when the animal attack had happened.
"I already... I know dad" Bella said inhaling deeply trying to calm her breathing as Charlie swallowed roughly nodding and looking away a little. She knew he'd be upset, but he wasn't one to openly show an emotion that was just the way Charlie was.
"I'm sorry Bells I knew you were close to..." Charlie pinched the bridge of his nose something she'd never seen him do before but it reminded her of Edward's own quirk when he was frustrated or upset, seeing her father do it only made her miss him more.
"I'm sorry too dad" Bella swallowed against the lump in her throat.
"We should have stayed away from the forest. It was so stupid, we'd heard about the animal attacks on hikers" Bella added to the lie helping to tell her own side, no one but those in the know would ever know the truth about what had happened that night. That Jake had attacked her and that Edward had killed him for it to save her.
"It doesn't matter now Bella I'm just so glad your okay" Charlie took her hand holding it in his rougher hand as Bella sat there between both her parents.
"Thank god Edward found you. That you got hold of him on that cell he bought you and that he and his brothers got to you in time" Charlie said with clear relief and gratitude.
"Where is Edward? I'd have thought he'd be here he's not left your side for barely a moment since he found you?" Charlie asked confused, Bella only feeling weaker in her need to have time to herself at her father's words. Of course he'd been there every moment, her ever loving and protective mate would have stayed by her side without complaint always, he deserved better than her mourning over his enemy.
"He's not slept or eaten. He's upset; I hurt his feelings by sneaking off to visit..." Bella couldn't even get his name out now but felt a weight off her chest at being able to tell at least some truth, she knew Edward was upset with her angry even, he had every right to feel that way too. She knew that.
"Don't worry Bella I'm sure he'll be fine. Probably just overwhelmed, Edward loves you this won't be anything you two can't get past" Bella looked at her father wide eyed at what he'd said but Bella could even see that Renee was now looking at Charlie strangely from what he'd said. In what world did Charlie get Edward's name right and hope for Edward and Bella to be able to work things out without saying it was Edward's fault to begin with.
"What?" Charlie asked.
Then his face turned a pinkish shade as he blushed as both Renee and Bella giggled at the way Charlie had reacted. Bella couldn't help but feel relieved though because as it felt like the supernatural part of her world was all but falling apart. Her human life, her parents hadn't changed at all. If anything it seemed that somehow in this horrible situation it had made things better, Bella hugged Charlie tightly ignoring the pain as she tried to hide her wincing as she held her father tight. She knew there had to be a story behind Charlie's change of heart about Edward and she believed that it be a story she actually wanted to hear, for all the things that had changed in her life since she'd woken up at least this was one good thing.
Charlie didn't hate Edward anymore.
Now she just had to make sure Edward didn't hate her for all of her mistakes.
