Chapter 2
The next afternoon Sarah showed up at the place(different from the night before, she would never show her face there again) for her lunch meeting with Michael and steeled herself before walking in, apprehensive as to what might happen.
"Sarah Williams, I'm meeting a Michael Smith, is he here?"
She asked the maitre'd.
"Oh, yeah, him. He's here."
"Is something wrong?" Sarah felt dread rise in her gut.
"Well, no...yeah...maybe. Is he a friend of yours?"
"We're meeting for the first time. Blind date."
The man snorted inelegantly. "You'd have to be." he mumbled under his breath, but she heard.
Uh oh, she thought.
"He seems to have some...nervous tics. But, hey, good luck. This way."
He led Sarah through the dining room, to a darkened area in the corner.
From the back Sarah saw are seemingly normal dark haired man.
"Here you are miss. Your waitress will be with you shortly."
Sarah swore the guy was trying not to laugh.
"HI ARE YOU SARAH?!"
Sarah jumped out of her skin. "Jesus!"
Michael stood, turned and stuck out his hand. "WHO'S JESUS?!"
Sarah was at a loss for words.
Michael had several huge warts on his face. She tried not to stare but these were not your normal run of the mill warts. They were gigantic, scaly and...
Ewwwww, Sarah thought and tried not to visibly shudder.
Her heart sank.
She took a deep breath and pasted on a smile.
"Ummm, hi Michael ." she put her hand in his, and he jerked her arm up and down like he didn't know how to shake hands.
"HI SARAH! YOU'RE PURDY!"
A waiter came over. " Sir, I must ask you again to keep your voice down."
"OKAY!"
He flopped back down in his seat.
Sarah sat down gingerly, moving back as far as possible. "So Michael , where are you from?"
"City." He shrugged. He picked up his fork and started tapping his plate with it.
"Oh. I'm from upstate, originally."
Sarah tried to look everywhere but his face.
He shrugged again. "Fork. Can I keep it?"
"I think they frown on stealing the silverware here Michael ."
The waitress came and brought them menus and glasses of water. She gave Sarah a sympathetic look. "I'll be back for your orders."
Sarah didn't want to commit to a large meal with this guy. She figured she'd order a salad and get out quick.
She watched in abject horror as Michael began to chew on the menu.
"Stop that." She said.
He looked up at her sadly. "But but.." He looked like he was going to cry.
"Fine." Not wanting a repeat of another tantrum, she let him be, and he happily began gnawing again. "Look, Michael , I don't think this will happen. I've decided not to..."
His eyes had widened in horror as he watched the people at the next table get served.
"OH MY BOG LADY! THE CHICKENS!" He jumped up and was gone before Sarah could stop him.
She watched as he grabbed the small roasted game hens of the terrified patrons plates and pressed them to his chest. "OH NOS NOT THE CHICKENS! HOW COULDS YOU KILLS THE CHICKENS! WAAAAHHHH!"
Everyone was staring, watching him wail. He fell on the floor and kissed, hugged and lamented over the two hens.
Finally he rose, and evil look in his eyes. "MURDERERS!"
He started flinging food everywhere as people yelled and ducked, and eventually resorted flinging food too.
From her vantage point under her table. Sarah sighed.
"Well crap, another restaurant I can't come back to," she mumbled to herself as chaos continued unabated.
Hours later after the debacle, more cops, who advised her to stop with the blind dates before the whole city was in tatters, writing a large check to an angry manager, she wearily fell back against her closed front door, her clothes, skin, and hair peppered with bits of food.
"What the hell is wrong with the men in this city?"
Given the events of the past two meetings, Sarah considered canceling her date with Jay. She wasn't sure she wanted to have a third restaurant on the list of places she could never show her face at again. She spent most of the next day debating if she should cancel or give it one more shot.
Finally she decided to just bite the bullet and go. If this turned out like the last two she would change her email and pretend she never had the idiotic idea to put that ad in the paper.
When she arrived at the restaurant, Sarah looked around as she entered the door. Maybe she could get a glimpse of Jay before he knew she was there. There were no single men to be seen though, which made her worry even more. Sighing she approached the maitre'd.
"Hi, Sarah Williams, I'm meeting a Jay King." She prepared for the worst.
"Yes, we have your table ready Miss Williams. Mr. King phoned saying he would be a little late and asked that we take care of you until he arrives. Please follow me."
Sarah followed the maitre'd to a large booth in the back and was surprised to find a dozen roses and a large box of chocolates waiting there. "What's all this?"
"Mr. King had those sent here for you." The man answered. "Please make yourself comfortable and your waiter will be with you shortly." He bowed and walked away, leaving Sarah alone with her roses and chocolates.
As she sat down she leaned forward to smell the roses. "Maybe this won't be so bad."
"Hello, Sarah. My apologies for being late."
Sarah was in no way prepared for what happened next, comprehending that all too familiar voice that she never expected to hear again.
