Sometimes we do the wrong things, for the right reasons.

Kung Fu Panda 3

x

She was certain he could see her. He could see her free falling. She blinked and glanced around, almost as if making sure he was really there. No, it wasn't a dream. She was clasping him and he was warm and he was watching her.

She avoided his gaze. So many thoughts pierced her head; she was getting dizzy. How did he have a son? Why? How long ago was this? Why didn't he tell her sooner? Who was the mother of the child?

But all she managed to croak was, "What do you mean, had?"

x

He put her down on the cement and she tripped over her own feet trying to stand. He reached an arm out reflexively to steady her, but she moved away. "Clary." He started, his voice hard.

She shook her head. "Explain everything. Right now." She tightened her hands together. Her fingers were trembling and she didn't want him to see.

x

He led her back to his room. This time, they weren't holding each other's palms. She was walking a foot behind him, the cold biting into her skin. She was terrified to hear the truth. Sure, he was older than her, but a child? She stared at the back of his head and repeated silently that he could never be a father. He was too reckless and too young. He didn't have an ounce of family in him.

She cleared her throat and pinched her thigh. No, this was supposed to be her chance to get the truth from Jace. She couldn't back down, even if it hurt her.

When they entered his room, he sat on his mattress and slid off his shoes. Glancing to her, he raised an eyebrow. "You're not going to storm away, are you?"

She scowled and settled on the carpeted floor in front of him. He couldn't be taking this as a joke. Not when she was so desperate for an answer. Clary swiped a strand of her hair away and met his eyes for the first time since he had lifted her up outside. Much to her dismay, she couldn't read his expression. His orbs were light now, almost an orange hue. Her chest contracted. "Jace..." She whispered involuntarily. "I won't leave." She shook her head. "I'll never leave as long as you're honest with me."

He sighed and stretched across his bed to grab a plastic bag. From it, he retrieved a bottle of beer.

x

When I left home and came to New York for the first time, I had nothing. I was broke. Didn't even have a dime. I didn't know what the fuck I was doing in such a big city. But I didn't care as long as I was away from my family.

The first thing I did was look for a job. It was hard. I didn't have much to boast about and I was young and inexperienced. I ended up playing music on the streets. Stealing here and there. I came across a club some time during the night. I was bored and tired and I still didn't have anywhere to sleep. So I went in. For a nineteen year old, it was pretty dope.

There were strippers and beer and prostitutes and men with big pockets. Nobody noticed me. Probably better that way. I came across this girl. She was older than me, I knew. Long blonde hair and big, blue eyes. She smiled at me. I guess I took that as an invitation. She wasn't with anybody. She was sitting on a stool, alone and beautiful.

She led me to a bedroom. I was too busy making out with her to notice where we were going. We had sex. I left. I thought it was a one night stand. I didn't want it to be. I wanted to see her again, but I was a kid and she probably had better things to do. A few weeks after seeing her, I was playing on the violin. I had about five or six people around me, listening. Somehow, I looked up in the middle of the Four Seasons and she was there. She nodded her head at me. Like she was telling to me keep going.

It went on like that. Her name was Aline. She didn't work, but she never told me how she made a living. I just guessed she lived off of her parents' wealth. We fooled around. We ate together. I taught her a little piano. And she even sang when I played out on the streets.

For months, I was high. I loved New York. Loved her. Loved my freedom.

All of a sudden, she told me she was pregnant. She was crying and laughing and scared. I was almost twenty and she was probably twenty six, but I didn't give a flying shit. When you're young, anything seems possible. I told her I wanted the kid.

We were in bed one night. She was smoking a cigarette and I was watching something on my phone.

We heard a bang. It was loud. I grabbed a baseball bat. Our apartment complex was pretty safe so I assumed a neighbor had had an accident. A group of men stormed in. Broke through our door. Aline hid behind me. I held her close. They could take whatever money we had. I just needed her and the baby to be okay.

They all wore suits. They weren't robbers. One of them stood taller than the rest. He smirked. I remember demanding what the fuck he wanted. He called Aline. He knew her name. He raised a gun. Pointed it at us.

Aline was crying.

He shot me.

And when I fell, he shot Aline in the head. She was dead in seconds.

Years later, I discovered he was her husband. Some leader of a gang.

The baby died with her.

x

Her eyes were watery, she realized. Clary kept her face lowered towards her lap. She couldn't bear to look at him. Her hands were fisted and she unfurled her fingers slowly, allowing herself to breathe again.

"Jace?" She called hesitantly.

He peeled off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. His face was still the same. It was like he hadn't been affected at all by his past. When he slid his keys to a table, he finally peered at her.

She was afraid to ask.

She did it anyway.

"Are you alright?"

He scoffed and took a gulp of his beer. It was nearly empty now. "That's what you wanted, right?"

She frowned and her cheeks reddened in a mixture of shame and anger. "What are you talking about?" She was talking like a child, whiny and hurt.

He rose up from his seat. "I gave you the truth." He sauntered past her and her face crumbled involuntarily. "Are you done now?"

Cold amusement.

That was all that washed through her ears.

x

She didn't know what room he was in or if he had escaped outside. She sat where she was and she cried. She didn't cry because he had become angry with her. She didn't cry because his story had been tragic and traumatic. She cried because he was so stupid. He was turning his back on the world and he was forgetting that there were people who cared for him.

He didn't need any pity, she reminded herself.

She wiped her nose with her sleeve. She was dazed and her thoughts were muddled. It was four in the morning and she was certain her absence wouldn't go unnoticed by her mother. She'd have to have Simon cover for her.

He wasn't in the bathroom. He wasn't in the alleyway. She paused near the door to the room where he had once played the piano. Was he in there? Would he kick her out?

She didn't knock. She turned the knob.

x

He was sitting on the piano bench, but the piano was covered. His head was down, leaning on the wooden frame of the instrument. She caught his slow breathing and the movement of his shoulders. Up and down. Her eyes softened. He was probably sleeping.

Clary thought about leaving. Still, coming in late would send her mother to a different planet and anyway, she didn't want to leave him. Not after what he had told her.

She took a few steps forward. She wanted to touch him. To embrace him. To nestle her head against his chest. To smell his familiar scent.

As if he heard her urges, he pushed himself up from the piano with a grunt. His bare back was tense and pale; the only colors she noticed were the ones used for his tattoos.

She took a seat beside him. Their knees knocked together. Without looking at him, she tugged the cover of the piano upwards. She played keys randomly. Curiously at first, then more and more carelessly. An octave jump here and an accidental there.

It was around a minute that he grabbed her hands, forcing them away from the white keys. "Stop that fucking noise already."

Upon finally hearing his complaint, she laughed.

x

She whirled to face him, her legs hanging from the two sides of the bench. "I'm sorry." She laid a hand on his chest, right where she could feel his heart beating. It was hammering now, no longer normal. She was inwardly pleased. She did have an effect on him, after all.

He watched her intensely, his cheeks flushed from alcohol. "I should've trusted you. If you don't want to tell me anything, you don't have to."

He opened his mouth. He was about to say something. She waited in desperation and impatience. And then she was tugged against him and he was kissing her.

x

This was the farthest they had ever gone. Her jacket was thrown aside and he was working on her shirt now, peeling the fabric off quickly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he lifted her outside of the room. She wasn't aware of anything but his lips. They were hot and sweet. He bit her neck and peppered her cheeks with soft licks and pecks. She couldn't get enough.

He set her down on his mattress and they momentarily parted, breathing heavily. She realized she was only wearing her bra and underwear. Her hair was a mess, caught around her shoulders and tucked behind her ears. Jace crept closer to her. His eyes were dark. If she didn't know him, she'd never believe his eyes were typically gold.

He leaned close. Close enough that their foreheads touched. Her eyelids threatened to hover shut. He cupped her face with soft hands and she let out a shuddering breath. "Jace." She mumbled, half unaware and half overwhelmed by his closeness.

Her bra was gone.

His tongue roamed her milky skin. She let him wander over from her neck to her cheeks and down her stomach. She played with his hair and he went back to claiming her lips. She called out his name repeatedly and he answered by smirking against her flesh.

"Fuck..." He growled, when she nibbled on his jaw and left red marks on his chest. No matter what they did, they weren't moving fast enough.

Once they couldn't handle the temptation any longer, Jace pushed himself on his elbows. She was beneath him, her auburn curls spread out on his pillow. He knew it wasn't the beer in his system that was driving him crazy. It was her. And now she was observing him, her green orbs wide and light. She bumped her nose with his and managed a grin.

Jace took her right there and then.

x

He slept with his head in the crook of her neck.

They slept till the afternoon.

They didn't even stir when Raphael entered, snickering quietly.

x

[a/n]: Hope you guys liked it! Let me know what you think.