Phoning it in: Side Story 1
For those that requested the MLP part of the last scene...
"Argh!" Twilight Sparkle exploded before slumping down in a pile of books, defeated.
"Are you OK, Twi?" Spike asked cautiously.
"Yes and no," she admitted with a sigh. "I'm fine, but unless I come up with a solution, my brother's going to die!"
"What?!" the young dragon exclaimed in shock. "B-but Shining looked fine when I last saw him!"
"I don't mean he's sick," Twilight said, "he's perfectly healthy, but Cadence is an Alicorn and immortal, and for that matter so am I, and neither one of us wants to watch him age and die."
"You were once a Unicorn just like him, only last year in fact, so why can't Princess Celestia do to him what she did to you?" he asked.
Twilight shook her head. "She put me on the path to becoming an Alicorn, but I had to do everything myself and everyone's path is different. Princess Celestia had several prophecies that helped guide her actions and she still made some mistakes. I have no clue where to even start with my brother and there is no magic I can find that would help me figure it out!"
"So this would be a bad time to tell you Pinkie has invited you to a party?" Spike asked.
"Until I solve this I have no time for parties," Twilight said before turning and running face first into Pinkie Pie.
"No time for parties!" Pinkie exclaimed in shock, "Are you insane?! Are you sick?! Did you develop hoof in mouth syndrome?!" she screaming in Twilight's face bowling her over.
Twilight got to her hooves with a groan. "I have to figure out how to make my brother an Alicorn and that's way more important than a party."
"More important than a party?!" Pinkie exclaimed in horror. "Sacrilege! Spike, I'll gather the villagers, you get the pitchforks and torches!"
"Right," Spike said, rushing off.
"This heresy shall not- Wait," Pinkie paused, "if I can get your brother turned into an Alicorn you can make it to my party, right?"
"Yeah," twilight agreed, "but good luck on that, I've been working non-stop for a week and I haven't found a single clue on how to do that."
"Fine, I need you to get you, Shining, Cadence, Celestia, and Luna to the Castle of the Two Sisters by tomorrow morning before breakfast," Pinkie said. "I have some preparations to make."
"Pinkie! I can't just order them around, what should I tell them?"
"Tell them Pinkie said so," Pinkie replied before bouncing off.
Twilight shook her head. "I can't see this going over well."
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
"The good thing about traveling with Tia is you always know when sunrise is," Luna said cheerfully to Cadence as they followed Pinkie deep into the Everfree Forest.
"After my second cup of coffee," Celestia agreed readily.
"Are you sure this is going to work?" Twilight asked Pinkie for the hundredth time. "And why can't you explain it?"
"Yes it will work and explaining it is kind of difficult," Pinkie said. "I'd have to explain my explanation and then I'd have to explain that and... and it would just go on forever!"
"How about you explain it to me and I won't ask for anymore explanations on it?" Twilight begged.
"Promise?" Pinkie asked.
"Pinkie Promise," twilight agreed, shaking hooves with her.
"Now the main problem with making Shining an Alicorn is that we don't know what kind of quests and personal growth Shining needs to accomplish that," Pinkie said, "thus we need someone from outside this fiction to change the context of the problem."
"I understood some of that," Twilight said with a sigh.
"As a fourth wall breaker I have knowledge and abilities you don't," Pinkie said with a shrug, "So I am going to gather all the pieces needed to attract an SI, which is someone who was taken from the other side of the fourth wall and pushed through it, and bribe him to fix the problem."
"And I understood almost none of that," Twilight admitted.
"Just tell us what we have to do," Shining said.
"We have to hide our cutie marks and let a strange offshoot of the ape family groom us, while pretending to have the same intelligence as a dog and keeping our mouths shut," Pinkie explained.
"Can I ask questions about this?" Twilight asked.
"Sure," Pinkie said cheerfully.
"Why do we have to pretend to be animals?" she asked.
"So we don't scare him off," Pinkie replied. "SIs can be real skittish sometimes."
"And why would he help us?"
"Because he's going to collect loose feathers and hair, so he has to pay us back for them," Pinkie explained.
"Turning me into an Alicorn seems like a steep price for that," Shining said, still not quite sold on the idea, as he was perfectly happy as he was.
"His context is different than ours," Pinkie said," so the value of what he gets will be different as well."
"So why are we hiding our cutie marks?" Cadence asked.
"So he doesn't get distracted and 'fix' the wrong thing," Pinkie said, "the last thing we need is for him to think the best way to pay us back is to start altering cutie marks. Now remember, we are just supposed to be animals so leave all books, bags, clothing, and jewelry on the trail before we reach the meadow in front of the castle," Pinkie announced.
"You're going to leave the Element of Laughter in the forest?!" Twilight exclaimed in shock.
"Nope, I'll need it to enhance my magic so he doesn't turn me into an Alicorn," Pinkie said.
"And it won't confuse things?" Luna asked.
"Maybe, but if that happens you'll all end up with new Elements and we'll simply have to try and find another way," Pinkie said as they stopped near their goal," and as an Element Bearer, Shining will age really slow so we'll have more time to figure things out. Now everypony strip!"
After…
Cadence nuzzled Shining causing his wings to stiffen and making her laugh as he blushed.
Pinkie grinned as they watched the two Alicorns frolic like foals on the trail ahead of them.
"Come on guys, you can play around once we reach Ponyville," Pinkie told them. "Spike and the Crusaders should have the party set up and ready for us."
"What's this party for?" Twilight asked.
"It's the first annual celebration of Shining's ascension to Alicornhood," Pinkie said cheerfully. "I put flyers up for it last week."
Pinkie bounced ahead to keep Cadence and Shining moving forward and not wandering off the trail.
"It's really best not to think about these things," Celestia told her with a smirk as Twilight froze up, her jaw hanging open.
Typing by: Abyssal Angel
