In the past three months since Mikal and I were brought back, I just haven't been able to shake the feeling of why I'm back.

I mean, as much as I had originally doubted she'd be successful in her hunt for the People In Charge, it still made sense that they would fix the mistake they had made by bringing her back.

Why me though? What was it about some guy that had intentionally slit his wrists with the intention to kill himself that made Kneller think I should be given a second chance? The more I thought about it, and the more I questioned it, the more I started thinking "I can't be that special" "there has to be someone else who'd been there and brought back to tell the tale.

Well, as it turns out, there is someone...actually, a handful of someones...plural, who seem to have had similar or the same type of experience as mine, even a few like Mikal's experience.

That is, according to this Facebook group I'd stumbled upon today in my search.

Kneller's Happy Survivors, it was so cleverly named, likely after that old Kneller's Happy Campers joke that Kneller had claimed was from an old friend who'd graffitied over an old FOR RENT sign.

Glancing up at the living room clock, to see when Mikal should be home, I decide to click the JOIN button and fill in answers to their set of basic questions.

"OPTIONAL" was clearly typed in all caps to indicate that the questions related to summing up my experience weren't required for entry, in the event that I wasn't ready to get into that just yet.

I glance down at my faded, yet still visible, wrist scars, and start typing away at what had gotten me there, was I there by mistake? Etc, etc.

Mikal had decided to make her appointment right after work, which leaves me with ample time to explore said group before she's back.

Even being that she's the last person I have to hide the subject from, it was clear that, despite not saying it out loud to respect my feelings about it, it really made her uncomfortable to talk about the whole thing.

And I can't blame her for wanting to put something like that behind her, who wouldn't?

Just as I'm about to wrap up my Facebook browsing for the day anyway, Luna starts barking excitedly at the sound of Mikal's key jangling in the lock of the front door.

My laptop clicks shut as she walks in, greeting Luna first before me as she shuts the door behind her.

She smiles when she looks over to the couch to see me. God, I love that.

"Hey, Z" she comes over to kiss me before going to the dining room to set her stuff down.

I smile back at her. "Hey, babe. How was work...slash the doctor's?"

She returns to the living room, to take the spot on the couch next to mine.

"Both were fine...same old, same old, for the work part of it...the latter part of it, we kinda gotta talk about though"

This worried me. "Why? Is everything alright?" She looks at me, as if worried about what I might say about what she has to say next.

"...I'm pregnant, Zia."