Grif finally gets that pizza he wanted.


Pairings Beyond Grimmons:

~Background Bitthews

~Background Kimbalina

~Background Kaikaina x Grey

~Background Jensen x Palomo

Other Notes for This Story:

~Set some undefined time after the events of Season 17, so SPOILERS exist.


Legal Disclaimer: I do not own Red vs. Blue or any of the show's characters. They are the rightful properties of Rooster Teeth.

Pizza Party

The hospital room was more crowded than usual. But that was okay because Doctor Grey had given her permission earlier for the social gathering when her patient expressed an interest in the so-called "pizza party." And no one argued with Doctor Grey. Not if they knew what was good for them.

The doctor in question was standing by the table holding piles of pizza boxes, asking a rather bored-looking Kaikaina Grif, "Really? So green beans on pizza isn't something they do on Earth?" As if she found the topic absolutely fascinating.

Kaikaina scoffed at the notion, "Not that I've heard of and I've heard of some weird shit," she exclaimed, "Believe me."

"Oh, I do." The dark-skinned woman in purple and white looked over the younger Grif sibling speculatively, "I'd love to hear some stories if you have the time."

"Where should I fucking start?" There was a grin in Kaikaina's voice as she responded to Doctor Grey, followed by a flirtatious waggle of her eyebrows.

Dexter Grif sighed at the scene. He should really stop his sister from embarrassing the family at some point, yeah? Yeah, fucking probably, but he still hadn't had his pizza yet, damn it!

"Green beans?" Carolina asked Kimball, who had decided to take a break from being presidential for this event, the two women trying to make it seem like it was no big deal that they were sharing one of the pizzas and leaning in close together over the box.

"Green beans are one of the more common pizza toppings on Chorus because they're easily cultivated." Kimball explained to the redhead, "Though it is far from the most common of toppings here. Trust me."

"Oh?" Carolina actually sounded intrigued, and holy fuck did she learn the eyebrow waggle from Kai?! Grif sighed again at his sister's apparently powerful influence.

"Oh, yeah," Palomo cut into the conversation as he proffered a piece of pizza to Jensen, who had just brought back two sodas, the tan-skinned girl blushing as she leaned over to take a bite with her hands still temporarily full, "Fish is pretty big here too." He explained through his blush as he tried-and-failed at not staring awkwardly in Jensen's direction.

"That's not so unusual." Washington stated thoughtfully from the circle consisting of him, Caboose, and Tucker over his bedside table, "We have sardines back on Earth too."

"What are those?" Bitters asked from nearby, looking up from his slice of pizza in apathetic confusion.

"Tiny fish you put on pizza?" Wash answered, appearing for a moment confused, as if he'd just realized he'd repeated a comment. The expression was something the blond still did on occasion now, though he was getting better with handling his spacey memory.

"Here on Chorus we use tilapia, sir." Andersmith politely informed Washington from the ring of Lieutenants.

"Tilapia?" It was Tucker's turn to get in on the conversation, "Why the fuck would you ruin good pizza like that?"

"Oh, like putting tiny fish on it doesn't ruin it either?" Bitters asked him disbelievingly, getting angry over the notion like a true maverick. Grif couldn't have been prouder, except that green beans and tilapia on pizza sounded fucking disgusting.

"Green bean and tilapia pizza really is delicious!" Jensen exclaimed, trying to defend the local cuisine now that Palomo had taken his soda from her and she could alternate between taking a bite of pizza or sipping herself.

"You should try it sometime for yourself, sir!" Andersmith added as Palomo nodded vigorously.

"Plus the bigger filet means even more fishy taste!" Palomo explained to his former captain, as if that made this pizza debacle suddenly make sense.

"Um. Pass." Tucker stated quickly, looking for all the world as disgusted as that pizza would inevitably make Grif feel.

"Aw, that's too bad!" Matthews chimed in from his spot next to Bitters, picking at a red disc of delicious meat on his own slice, "But this sausage stuff is quite good too!"

"It's pepperoni, Matthews." Grif couldn't help but say, inwardly embarrassed by his former subordinate's lack of pizza knowledge as if it reflected on himself. He should have taught them better, damn it!

"Pepperoni." The auburn-haired youth repeated, grinning, "You sure are knowledgeable, Captain Grif!"

Bitters rolled his eyes fondly, biting into two slices at once like the maverick he was, "Suck-up." He said under his breath, although Grif caught the undercurrent of affection he saved for Matthews.

Sarge scoffed from the doorway following checking up on a still sulking Lopez. The robot had said earlier that he still needed to tell them all something important about the secrets of the universe or whatever, but like fuck was Grif going to tell anyone else what he was saying and screw up this once in a lifetime chance to finally relax!

"Of course he is when it comes to food. That's the one thing Grif's an expert on!" The Reds' leader couldn't help but add in to the conversation.

"Thanks, Sarge." The orange-armored soldier replied as he rolled his dark eyes, "You really get me."

"Don't mention it, dirtbag." Sarge said jovially before moving over to the pizza table to pick out some slices for himself.

"Might I suggest you try this gluten-free pizza with organic goat cheese, Sarge?" Doc offered as the older man approached.

The blank look the older man in red gave the bespectacled brunette said it all, "Son, don't come anywhere near me with that new age hippie food."

"I bet Donut would try it if he were here." Doc muttered under his breath, and for a brief moment Grif thought of his fellow Red Team member. Donut was currently on his sabbatical, and Grif hoped he was at least having a good time, wherever he was. Not that he'd ever freaking admit that out loud. Naturally, his thoughts immediately went back to pizza when he was done with the whole inwardly caring deal.

"Did I ever tell you about the time my cat Loki stole a pizza slice from right off the counter?" Washington asked Caboose, reveling in the same anecdote he'd shared when the party began.

Caboose looked thoughtful at the remark, "I bet Freckles could steal pizza too. Even if he just asked for it nicely!"

Washington, along with several others in the room, laughed, "You're probably right, Caboose."

There was a fidgeting movement next to Grif, and he turned his head slightly to see Simmons still looking at the pizza boxes on the table with a speculative frown on his face, "I still don't get how you managed to bring all of this pizza to Chorus." The redhead finally said to the twinkling light currently flying over him, "You can't even pick things up!"

"Dude, seriously? That's going to be the thing you dwell on right now?" Grif asked the maroon-wearing man incredulously.

Simmons huffed, his face going red in a blush, "But it's just...!"

"Don't sweat the details, Simmons!" Huggins advised from near the ceiling of the hospital room, "What's important to focus on is that I'm treating you guys for inadvertently saving time and the universe as we know it!" She shrank slightly, "You know, after you very nearly doomed us all beforehand."

"And that's very nice of you, but the physics behind it..." The kiss-ass just wasn't going to stop!

"Simmons, you heard her. We just saved the very fabric of the universe." Grif stated, "Let's not get caught up in the details."

"I think I'd like a few more of them myself, personally." Kimball remarked, the others from Chorus all nodding their heads in agreement.

But Grif chose to ignore them and whatever else anyone said afterwards, focusing entirely on Simmons instead. The lanky redhead sighed in defeat and slumped over in his chair, "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"'Course I am." Grif said, reaching out for the bottom of the three pizza boxes he was currently holding. The top one was open, nearly all its delicious contents already gone into Grif's stomach. He passed the bottom box along to Simmons instead, "Now hurry up and don't ruin this glorious, long overdue moment."

Simmons looked down at the pizza box in surprise, "You saved me a whole pizza?" He asked in shock.

Grif glanced up at Huggins, the two conspiratorially winking at one another despite Huggins' lack of a face. "Not just that, Simmons. I may have mentioned to Huggins what a picky eater you are..."

"Hey!" The nerd released a high-pitched cry of indignation and Grif had to try really hard not to suppress his smirk.

"So she got you your favorite pizza." The heavyset soldier said instead, clearly loving this awkward moment.

"You're welcome, flesh-ling!" Huggins blurted out excitedly, "Now eat up before it gets cold!"

"I," Simmons opened the pizza box and looked down at the cheese and artichoke pizza that lay within, glancing at the two friends in a flabbergasted manner, "I don't know what to say!"

"Just eat it quickly so that it doesn't offend the more sensible pizzas here." Grif advised.

Simmons sniffled, clearly touched, "You actually remembered."

Grif wanted to say "Of course, kiss-ass!" to that since he always remembers everything the nerd says, even in passing. But that might be too far into sentimental territory for this moment. Or for any moment.

As Grif stared at Simmons looking down in awe at an open pizza box, he couldn't think of a better view. Simmons with pizza was glorious. Grif asked teasingly, "Are you tearing up over food right now?" He felt himself grinning, "Because if so, that is awesome."

Simmons' face took on a fitting tomato sauce red as he blushed even more, nudging Grif with his elbow, "Sh-shut up, fat-ass!" He replied without venom.

Grif just laughed, both men leaning into each other's touch. Surrounded by friends and delicious, delicious pizza, Grif couldn't help but think that this single moment was well worth the wait.


Author's Notes: Who else wants pizza now? XD This was a special request from my sister, who suggested a pizza party story. I had fun writing this piece, and I hope you enjoyed reading it. :D