AN: I've finally gotten some momentum on this story, so we should be set for weekly updates for a while. This is a bit free-wheeling overall, so I'm not totally sure how many chapters to expect. Feedback on what you like / don't like (e.g., more Weasley pranks? more cute Lee / Hermione sibling stuff? plot?) can very much steer the direction at this point, otherwise I'll just listen to the characters and where they think they're headed!
When Hermione finally got back to the common room, the party was in full swing; evidently someone else had gone down to the kitchens to get the food from the elves, as the tables were piled high with treats. Hermione felt like she was in another world after waiting in an empty hall with a dead-looking classmate and then talking with the grave Headmaster in the Hospital Wing.
"Hermione!" Lee scooped her up and started to spin her but stopped when he saw her haggard face. "What happened?"
"Actually, everyone needs to hear this," she stated in a quivering voice.
Lee pointed his wand at his throat and muttered "sonorous" before shouting, "Oy! Everyone! Mini-Lee has an important announcement!"
She tried to force a grin at the affectionate name but failed. The room grudgingly ground to a quiet hum.
"Colin Creevey has been petrified, just like Mrs. Norris. He's in the hospital wing with the Headmaster and Madame Pomfrey," she stated.
The whispers and gasps spread like Fiendfyre across the common room. A soft crash of a goblet hitting the ground sounded near the fireplace.
"Petrified?" Lee asked, grimacing as he realized his voice was still unnaturally loud.
She nodded, the stress of the afternoon catching up with her. Tears leaked from her eyes.
"They can't wake him up until the mandrakes grow up. Maybe months! He was holding his camera right in front of his face; he was probably going towards the locker room just like I was, but I'd stopped at the kitchens first. When Dumbledore opened the camera to see if he'd seen his attacker, this grimy black smoke billowed out… And Colin just looks so awful, like he'd been hit with a Body-bind but even his eyes don't move!"
She collapsed, fully sobbing now into Lee's arms as the twins elbowed their way over to envelope them in a bigger hug.
The shocked whispers slowly crescendoed and Fred started waving away folks who wanted to ask Hermione more questions.
"Leave her alone! I'm sure McGonagall will be here any minute with an update for all of us. She's just a third year; she doesn't have any more insight than what she told you all!"
Personally, Fred actually really doubted that. Their little prankster always amazed them with her knowledge and insights, but given that she was nearly convulsing as she cried, their job was just to protect her.
"I'm taking her up to the dorm. Keep this lot out, okay?" Lee muttered, hoisting her up in his arms. The two Beaters nodded and helped clear the way through the crowd.
** JP ** JP ** JP **
The next morning at breakfast, the whole school was buzzing with the news. McGonagall had indeed come to the Common Room to share basically the same information as Hermione, minus the minor histrionics. Colin would be fine, with no repercussions beyond missing some class. No, they had not apprehended the culprit. No, they did not think it was a student. Yes, the Ministry had been informed.
Suddenly, Malfoy's strident voice carried across the room. "Finally Slytherin's heir is ridding this place of Muggle filth. He warned everyone with Mrs. Norris and now he's down to business. That camera brat is lucky he's alive! The Mudbloods are probably too stupid to know they aren't wanted, and this Muggle-loving administration is too incompetant to even keep the magical weaklings safe. I've already written father all about it."
"Mr. Malfoy!" McGonagall's shocked voice rang out across the room, "Detention, every night this week with me."
"Just worried about the students, Professor," he challenged, grinning as some of his fellow Slytherins snickered.
"As are we all." The headmaster slowly rose from his seat, looking tired. The frantic conversations that had started after Malfoy's pronouncement about the Heir hunting Muggleborns sputtered silent. "As you clearly all know, a student was petrified last night just as Mrs. Norris was on Halloween. The writing left indicates that the perpetrator wants us to believe the legendary Chamber of Secrets has been opened and its fabled beast the culprit. I implore all of you to keep a level head about this unlikely scenario.
"That being said, given an attack on our student body, we must be cautious. Students must adhere to a strict curfew of 8pm and travel in pairs. This is for your safety, so any infractions will be harshly punished, and we will not hesitate to send students home if they cannot behave themselves in a way that is consistent with these new rules.
"I also encourage anyone who has information about these attacks to come forward. Even if you had some involvement with these attacks, you will be treated leniently if you come forward."
With those words, he sank back into his chair as the students exploded into frenzied speculation, fear, and outrage.
** JP ** JP ** JP **
"This Unknown Prankster needs a new name. He's no prankster, more like deranged sociopath. He's gone into the Wizarding War level crazy shite from what Mum and Dad have said. Attacking students with racist language… it's just beyond the pale," Fred groused.
"Not to mention ruining what was shaping up to be an excellent year otherwise," George moped.
McGonagall had pulled the twins and Lee aside to warn them that these were not the times to be testing boundaries. She had already taken the liberty of warning both their sets of parents that any after-hours or out-of-bounds behaviour and they'd be sent home that very day. Which, of course, made all three of them start brainstorming how to get around these restrictions with maximum flair until she added, "And any of these antics would of course endanger your protege, who need I remind you is a Muggleborn. I know she follows at your heels, so please make sure those heels aren't going anywhere that would place her in harm's way."
And so, for the first time any of them could remember, they planned to follow the letter of these new Hogwarts rules. It was depressing, really.
"We just need to find him, fast. He's already wrecked this fall, but we can still salvage the new year."
"Could be a she," Hermione chimed in.
"Or she," Fred added diplomatically.
"Do we have any better ideas for how to do this?" Lee asked.
"And how we're going to stay sane if we can't pull any pranks?" George whined pathetically.
"Are we or are we not the best pranksters that Hogwarts has ever seen?" Hermione cried, startling the three boys so much that Fred actually tipped off the couch. "Yes, we have new restrictions about roaming the castle, and yes, we have an evil arch-nemesis to take down. Is either of those things really going to stop us from our mission of achieving mayhem? Or are we going to treat these rules as constraints to push us to new creativity and new heights? Most creative work flourishes under adversity and constraint, you know. I was just reading this article…"
"And she's back!" Lee shouted, half-tackling her to tickle her. "With that inspiring speech, I wondered where our little prankster bookworm had gone. But then the references started bleeding through! Ahahaha!"
Hermione had hit him with a Tickling Charm in retaliation somewhere around "bookworm."
"But she's right! We were almost ready to rot under these rules, rather than rise against them like the true pranksters we are," George solemnly avowed.
"So we have two goals: first, catch this evil petrifying, fear mongering git who is giving pranking a bad name and two, continue our reign of pranks despite the geographical restrictions we face," Fred finished.
"We should focus on our plan to catch this bigot Heir-wannabe first," Hermione suggested.
"Okay, folks! You heard the lady. Crime-fighting first, then pranks!" Lee announced enthusiastically.
"I am loath to suggest this for fear that my dearest other half's head may explode in excitement, but I think we should monitor the map more. Look for unusual behavior, even if it's something as simple as sitting alone for too long." George stuck his tongue out at Fred, who did indeed look delighted by this unexpected vote of support for his obsession.
"Seconded," Lee added.
"I know Fred's vote, so fourthed," Hermione chirped. "We might consider adding some spells to it to make monitoring easier. I'll bet I can convince Lockhart to let me sign a gazillion books out of the library."
The three boys laughed uproariously at this last pronouncement, causing the tiny third-year to flush pink. They had teased her mercilessly in September when they saw she had drawn hearts on her schedule around Lockhart's name and even aced his inane quiz on his own trivia. When she'd stomped into the common room days later calling him a fraud who probably wouldn't recognize a vampire after it had drained him to a husk and threatening to unmask his idiocy, the boys had convinced her instead to lean in and cultivate him as a hapless ally. Which she had done beautifully, of course, although she was still mortified by the reminder that her initial fawning and admiration had been genuine.
"Okay, so map monitoring extra heavily-"
"With notes," Hermione added.
"With notes," Lee agreed. "What else? I feel like we can't just use this map and hope we see something that we recognize as weird."
"Can we set some sorts of traps? Or monitoring devices around the castle? That way we can know what's going on without being out after hours!" Fred was nearly bouncing in his seat in excitement.
"Yes! Like those CCTV cameras Hermione showed, but with magic!" George mimicked his brother's actions unconsciously.
"We should definitely put some near the Quidditch storage rooms as well. This is the second time Potter's had equipment cursed in as many years," Lee jumped in.
"Shite! I'd actually forgotten about that after the whole incident with Creevey! We should somehow look into those Slytherins. I think Malfoy's being too open to be actually responsible for the Heir stuff, but… worth keeping tabs," Fred added with utmost seriousness.
"What if it's a Gryff, trying to frame a Slytherin?" Hermione whispered.
"You, young lady, have been reading too many mystery books, suspecting a Gryffindor like that!" Fred admonished.
George looked thoughtful. "I reckon they wouldn't have attacked Colin though, would they?"
"Unless he'd irritated them waving that blasted camera in their face…"
They all fell silent as they imagined one of their own attacking the admittedly irritating firstie.
"Okay, fine. Let's focus on the widescale surveillance and map-including Quiddith storage- unless someone comes up with a brilliant strategy for interrogating specific people of interest. Or until we have specific people of interest," Lee stated decisively, ignoring the twin's faux-coughed "Malfoy" and "Flint" suggestions.
"Should we talk to Hagrid? Subtly? Make sure he knows we don't think he did it, but that we think someone is trying to scare students and see if we can get anything useful about what they might be trying to recreate?" asked Hermione.
"Brilliant! We can ask him after Care of Magical creatures… maybe try to cue up something about Acromantula and see if we can get him talking," Fred answered. George and Lee nodded their assent.
"Okay, good planning team. Who wants to take the first watch with the map?" Fred continued.
He pouted as his question was met only with dramatic groans.
