It'd been a crazy few weeks on the ranch. But it was a good crazy. Grams knew how to keep Natasha and I, then Jared when he finally stuck around busy enough to keep our problems at bay. Even injured and aching, there was always something for us to do. Though Grams had banned us from any weapons for, much to my disgust. There was something very soothing about shooting cans full of petrol. Natasha's grouchy mood turned into sleeping in my bed every night, but at least she was smiling again. She was still tight lipped about what was bothering her though and no amount of pushing was getting her to open up about it. Her nightmares frequently jolted me awake. The only reason she wasn't sitting on the porch with me was because she overdid it today. A handful of painkillers with a glass of wine at dinner was enough to even knock Natasha out. She didn't stir, even when I'd jolted awake from my dream, heart racing and covered in sweat. All I got was a grunt when I eased myself out of bed and came to sit out on the porch.
I sighed, staring out onto the frost covered fiends in front of me. My breath misted in front of me, making me pull the blanket I'd acquired off the couch a little tighter around me. It was then night before Thanksgiving. Or morning of. I hadn't looked at the clock before I came out here. The weather had turned icy cold a few days before, threatening snow but delivering bucket loads of rain instead. It was no fun sloshing around in half frozen mud. But at least the rain had stopped tonight. The sky was crystal clear. Out here you could see thousands of stars blotted against the inky sky. There was no moon to shroud them either. It was breathtaking to look up and realise how many stars there really were. Somewhere in the distance, one of the potty calves mooed in frustration. There weren't many of them, being the end of autumn. But feeding the orphaned calves had become one of Natasha's favourite things. They were adorable, all legs and big pleading eyes anytime you went near their field, hoping for a drink or a pat. There were 3 of them at the moment, all girls, so I let myself get attached to them. At least they most likely wouldn't end up as a steak.
I took a swig of beer through my straw. Though the ache in my jaw had settled to more tolerable levels, I was still 3 weeks away from getting my wires out. They itched and made the inside of my mouth bleed. Not even with braces on did my mouth ever hurt so much. I felt like a teenager again, packing the wires full of dental wax so I could give my sore mouth a chance to heal. Despite being kept busy, there was something very soothing about being here on the ranch. It held so many good memories. With those memories came remembering my visit with Riley last year.
There were times I'd have nightmares of Riley dying, over and over again. They were horrible and I'd wake up in a cold sweat with my heart pounding. But there were also good dreams of Riley that when I woke up almost felt like they should be a nightmare. It's what I'd had earlier. I'd dreamt that instead of the contract for the house Riley brought us in his locker, it was an engagement ring. He was still alive and he'd proposed. The resulting sex dream after that had woken me up with a start. I'd been still half asleep, conscious of the body in my bed. When I rolled over, I thought Riley was there. But the feminine curves under my hands woke me up very quickly. It was a painful reminder of the person I'd lost and what could have been. I think I'd prefer the nightmares of Riley dying instead of something like that. It also made me have some crippling guilt about the contents in my phone right now.
It was still silent from Greg. Every time I saw his name in my phone, it was another slap in the face of rejection. But I couldn't bring myself to delete his number yet. Gareth more than made up for it. He'd even asked me to come down for the Christmas dine in night for his work. It was the week before Christmas so my jaw would be unwired in time for it. I'd already said yes to it, pleased and flattered at the time. But after the dream I just had, I was second guessing my decision. My phone sat next to me and my fingers were already itching to make an excuse not to go. If it was the other way around, I was sure Riley wouldn't be even considering sex with another person. It made me feel like I was betraying his memory just because my body was craving someone else touch.
"You're awake awfully late, or is it early?" Mom's voice made me jump, snapping me back to present times. She came out onto the porch, bundled in a big coat and carrying 2 steaming mugs.
"Early, I think." My speaking was getting better with every passing day. Long conversations made my jaw ache, but I could finally manage well enough to not need the iPad with me at all times. I glanced at my phone, the screen lighting up briefly as I checked the time. 0415. Definitely early.
"Bad dream?" Mom asked, coming to sit besides me. She handed over the mug, before bringing her legs up to curl underneath her. I relinquished the grip on the blanket a little, so Mom could get some over her lap.
I sighed again, putting down my beer on the ground. No doubt I'd get an earful about drinking so early in the morning. The smell of hot chocolate and marshmallows wafted up to my nose. It was a lot more appetising than a cold beer anyway.
"Not exactly." I took a sip of the hot chocolate. It made my eyes water at the taste of something alcoholic, I wasn't expecting that. I looked at Mom in surprise.
"Baileys," Mom said with a wry grin before I could ask. "You looked like you could do with a little extra. Its too cold to be drinking beer."
I returned the smile, albeit more strained that Mom's smile was. She could probably feel the sadness and guilt rolling off me in waves. She didn't have to ask what was bothering me. All it took was a look from her and it was spilling out of my mouth.
"Sometimes the good dreams hurt way more than the bad ones," I said sadly, my eyes fixed in my hot chocolate. The old wound had broken open again and my heart felt like it was physically breaking again. What if Riley really had been going to propose at dinner when we got back? Why was I even thinking these things? Riley was dead and buried in Arlington. No one found a ring so even if he was, it was a secret he took to the grave. I didn't even know why I was sitting here contemplating it.
"Riley?" Mom asked, reaching over to squeeze my free hand. I nodded in confirmation, not trusting the sudden lump the appeared in my throat. "It's okay to miss him."
"Some days I miss him so much it hurts," I said softly, looking up again over the frost covered fields. "Other days I feel like I'm putting the pieces of my life back together without him. Then I second guess myself about moving on."
"There's no expiration on your grief Kari." Mom squeezed my hand again. "Riley wouldn't want you to mourn forever. But you take things are your own pace and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."
Taking things at my own pace had worked until the night before our mission. Then everything had blown up in my face. Now I had no idea what I was doing. Again. Sometimes I wished I'd never fallen for that shy smile in my first day at SHIELD. Maybe my life would have been easier without ever knowing Riley.
"Who was it?" Mom took a sip of hot chocolate, not missing a beat. I gave her a questioning look, hoping to throw off her line of questioning. I should have know better. She was far more intuitive than I ever gave her credit for. "Greg or Gareth? The one that hurt your feelings and made you doubt yourself."
I should have known Mom would have clued on by now. How she knew about Gareth was beyond me though. I was very careful not to leave my phone lying around because Gareth was very unpredictable with what he was sending. He really wasn't shy either.
"Greg," I admitted, feeling my cheeks flame red. Here I was, 24 years old and I still couldn't admit to my own mother about my sex life. "I…"
I trailed off, clearing my throat. I had no idea how to tell Mom what we'd been doing.
"Kari, honey, I know you aren't a shy little virgin." Despite the serious tone of the conversation, Mom's eyes sparkled in humour. "Whatever you were about to say isn't going to shock me."
"Right." The blush in my face didn't diminish any. I don't know why I was so embarrassed. It's not like Greg and I had actually done anything. "I kissed him. He kissed back. I ended up half naked and then he freaked out and walked out without an explanation when I went for his pants."
Mom went strangely silent. Her fingers tapped against the side of the mug as she looked like she was wrestling with something. Like me, Mom didn't have a great poker face. She always spoke what was on her mind and never beat around the bush about anything.
"What?" The silence only lasted for 30 seconds, but I couldn't help myself. I hated it when Mom knew something that I didn't.
"It was a long 2 weeks while you were unconscious," Mom's quiet voice made me feel all kinds of guilty. She never spoke about it, but from the bits and pieces I knew from Natasha, it wasn't a good time. "Greg was around a lot more because he had security clearance from his time in the Army. SHIELD nearly had him sleeping there until the other doctor's clearances went through. We talked a lot. You know how bad your brother was."
Mom trailed off, her fingers clenching around her mug tight enough that her knuckles went white. I could see her visibly swallow a few times before she managed to speak again. Her voice was strained, dropping to almost a whisper.
"There was one time where Jared nearly didn't make it." Mom's eyes went unnaturally bright from unshed tears. "Greg was first on the scene and it was chaos. No one thought to tell us to get out while they tried to resuscitate him.."
I squeezed Mom's hand as hard as I dared to as she spoke. Besides Natasha, no one ever told me how bad Jared had really been.
"The doctor's worked on him for what seemed a lifetime," Mom's voice cracked. She sniffed, reaching up to wipe her nose with the crook of her elbow. My heart broke a little more seeing Mom look so vulnerable. "He was dead and the senior doctor asked if anyone objected if they stopped. Greg was the only one who did. But they gave him another minute. Next thing Jared sat up, flailing and how he did it I'll never know, but he yanked his ventilator clear out."
My own hand clutched at the mug of hot chocolate, I was sure it'd shatter under my hands. All those months ago Natasha told me Jared nearly didn't make it, and the doctors nearly called it once. I had no idea it had actually been that bad though. Or that Greg was there.
"All Jared could say was 'Riley sent me back' over and over again." Mom looked over at me with a heartbreakingly sad smile. "Then he fell unconscious again and stabilised completely once you were in the room. When I asked Jared about it, he could only remember Riley yelling at him to go back. Nothing else."
"The brain shuts down and you hallucinate before you die," I forced my voice to stay calm. Riley wasn't religious and neither was I. I didn't believe there was anything after you died. I forced down the bigger lump in my throat thinking about what Mom had just said. It was impossible. The shattered pieces of my broken heart chipped away a little more even considering it. "Jared's brain was going haywire from lack of oxygen. Nothing more."
"Or someone is watching over you,"Mom countered gently. She swirled the hot chocolate around in the mug, her eyes dropping down while she looked like she was gathering her thoughts. "After everything I've seen in my life, what powers people can have, an afterlife where your loved ones watch over you isn't such a crazy idea."
It really wasn't. I knew a girl who could send people back in time. But having a guardian angel, or whatever you wanted to call it sounded far fetched for my mind. If I couldn't see it, feel it or touch it, I had problems believing it existed. I was very much like Dad in that way, its probably where I got it from.
"So, that of course lead to questions about who Riley was." Mom blew out a soft breath. It misted in front of her, hanging in the air for a few seconds. "From Greg mostly. I told him and didn't think anything of it until I caught on he was attracted to you a few weeks later."
How the hell could Greg even be the slightest bit attracted to me while I was in hospital? It was months ago but I remembered how terrible I looked and felt for those months afterwards.
"I may have confronted him about it." Despite her careful choice of words, Mom didn't look the least bit embarrassed about it. I gave her an incredulous look, which she brushed off right away. "Alexi will have boyfriends one day and you'll be doing the exact same thing."
That made me smile, it was true. I couldn't fault Mom for that. I was her baby girl, even at 24. Nothing was ever going to change that. I knew she'd given Riley the shovel talk while we were in Afghanistan. He'd shown me the email and I'd laughed my ass off about it for 2 minutes straight.
"The only thing Greg is confident about in his life is his job, that he's a good doctor, and he is," Mom said, looking up to meet my eyes. I couldn't dispute that. Even Laura had good things to say about Greg at work. "Do you know why he left the Army?"
"Natasha said he got discharged because of PTSD," I said with a nod. Natasha snooping came in handy sometimes.
"From the little bits and pieces I put together, it took him a long time to put his life back together. It's why he threw himself into his studies and became a doctor," Mom said with a small sigh. "When I confronted him about it, he told me the attraction would never be returned. He couldn't ever measure up to someone like Riley and he'd only disappoint you. It's why he'd never act on it but he could be your friend if you wanted him."
Well, that put a new perspective on things. Natasha's comment about him hesitating made so much sense now. I didn't know whether to feel sorry for Greg for thinking so little of himself, or still be mad about him not explaining himself at the time. He was smart, good looking and went out of his way to make me feel special, like making me that ice cream. He had a good job and on the outside had his life completely in control.
"He still hurt my feelings by not calling." I couldn't keep the hurt out of my voice. Being mad was easier than feeling sorry for him. "He didn't have to kiss back, or pull my clothes off. He said he'd talk when we were sober and I was definitely not drunk."
I huffed out an angry sigh.I couldn't get it out of my head how good it felt right up until he freaked out and left without an explanation. Maybe there wasn't anything beyond him not wanting to be my rebound fuck. God knows some guys had delicate egos like that. I just didn't pick Greg to be like that.
"I wasn't there, I can't tell what was going on in his head." Mom gave me a sympathetic smile. "Maybe he did call, but because your phone was off you didn't get it?"
"Maybe." I looked at my phone, the anger leaving as quickly as it came on. There was nothing stopping me sending him a text, except my hurt pride. "It doesn't matter now. It'll only be awkward between us."
I was mourning the loss of friend, as well as being hurt by rejection. I really enjoyed the friendship between Greg and I. We had fun together and there was never any expectations. We met up when we could. Neither of us got angry if the other was busy. He was a breath of fresh air in my life, someone outside of the military and SHIELD.
"So who's Gareth and what's going on between you two?"
I should have known that question was coming. It still surprised me though. The Bailey's spiked hot chocolate was giving me a little bit of courage to talk to Mom about this.
"He's from my old work," I said carefully. "We started talking after I did that demo in the F-35. He invited me down to the Christmas dine in night in December."
"And are you going to go?" Mom asked. She was trying her best to keep her curious tone out of her voice.
"I thought I was and now I'm not so sure." My shoulders slumped a little. I was so confused. My next question fell out of my mouth before I could stop it. "Am I betraying Riley's memory by wanting sex with someone else?"
"Sweetie, no." Mom reached over and gave me a gentle hug. It was an awkward embrace between both of us trying to juggle the hot chocolate. Mom sat back, taking my free hand again, squeezing it hard. "I know there is no delicate way of putting this. But Riley is dead and he isn't coming back. You have a long life ahead of you and there's going to be a point in your life when you need to take another step forward You can't dwell in the past forever. I know you miss him, but there's no shame in missing sex either."
That sounded awkward coming from my Mom. She didn't look the least but perturbed though. I was more embarrassed about the question actually coming out of my mouth. She was right though. Only I could decide what I wanted to do.
"I hate this," I said with another heavy sigh. I watched the droplets of my breath caught in the freezing air in front of me before I continued. "I don't know what to do."
"Go to the dine in night with Gareth," Mom suggested. "But don't stay at his place. Get your own room somewhere so you have the option to decline if you don't feel comfortable on the night. You said before you loved catching up with your old Squadron. Go, have fun with your old friends. There's no pressure to do anything else you don't want to."
It was such a simple solution. I mentally smacked myself for not thinking of it earlier.
"Thank you." I reached over and gave Mom a hug. It was advice I'd heard before, but coming from Mom it made me feel less guilty. It might have been her subtly using her powers, but I was feeling a lot better than when I first came out here. It'd been an emotional rollercoaster, but I was feeling a little more at peace with myself.
"I'm always here if you need me." Mom hugged me back. "Always. I'm sorry what happened with you and Greg."
"Me too." My voice was muffled in her shoulder. "Losing a friend sucks."
"Maybe send him a text?" Mom suggested gently as we untangled. She gave me a soft smile. "It won't hurt. Get some sleep though. You know how crazy today can get."
Mom got up, dropping a kiss on the top of my head as she went. She drained the last of her hot chocolate and left me alone with my thoughts once again. I looked down at my silent phone, pondering what Mom had just said. My hand reached for my phone, my cold fingers stiff against the cool glass screen as I unlocked it. I brought a new message up with Greg's name. Butterflies erupted in my stomach as I stared at the blank message.
What would I say to him? A greeting would work, but it also came across as desperate. Telling him I knew why he didn't want to go any further with me was a way too bold. Like Mom said, she wasn't there. So it was only an assumption that it was the real reason why he rejected my advances. The longer I stared at the blank message, the more the butterflies grew. I could do this. I was a grown ass adult and could deal with a communication fuck up between friends. I'd drive myself insane if I didn't fix this.
But I was also the worlds biggest chicken when it came to shit like this. I shut my phone without typing out anything. I'd do it later. Maybe I'd wait until I went back to DC so we could talk about it in person. Getting up, I nodded to myself. Yep, that was a good plan. I could definitely put this off for another 2 weeks before I went back to DC. Mom wasn't wrong about today was going to get crazy. I'd need all the sleep I could get.
I finished my hot chocolate and went back inside. My eyes were heavy and I couldn't stop yawning as I dragged myself to my bedroom. Natasha looked like she hadn't moved since I left her earlier on. I crawled in beside her, enjoying that the bed was still warm. My eyelids tugged down on their own and I was out like a light.
Thanksgiving was always a crazy affair and this year was looking to be no different. I woke up mid morning and was instantly roped into helping set up for dinner. This year I got out of any physical work, like setting up the marquee that we all ate under. But it left me with the more boring ones, like folding napkins and putting out cutlery. Mom promised me she'd been able to make most of the food into a liquid form so I wouldn't miss out of anything. Blended pumpkin pie wasn't going to be the same, but it wasn't like I could be fussy about what was given to me. Mom had gotten really good about making food drinkable. It turns out with enough gravy and stock, you could even make meat into a drinkable form. It sounded disgusting, but it was real food. Something I appreciated at the moment.
Natasha got her first real taste of how big and insane my extended family was. As all the family started to pour in through the afternoon, Natasha stuck closer and closer to my side. It was an hour before dinner would be served and she'd been glued to me, even though I had the boring job of folding napkins.
"How many fucking cousins do you have?" Natasha muttered under her breath in Russian. She'd just been introduced to my cousin Alex and his wife. Alex was only 6 months older than Jared and I, so while he was in a grade above us in school, we grew up fairly close. Alex worked in SHIELD in New York as a behavioural analyst. I had no idea what he actually did as one of those. The job description went way over my head. His wife, Rosemarie worked as a photographer. What she photographed was beyond me though. I thought she was a stuck up bitch, but in her defence, I'd only ever met her at family gatherings. I don't think I'd ever had a conversation with her.
"Way too many," I replied, in the same language as I handed Natasha a handful of folded napkins. We'd been handing off some of the tasks to my younger cousins. Well, second and third cousins, I think. I really had no idea most of the time. But most of them had disappeared now. A small horde of children under 10 had gathered and were causing a ruckus. Looking at the younger ones made me miss Alexi. Jared had brought her out a few times while we'd been here. But I hadn't seen her all this week. She would have loved being in charge of the mass of children.
"$50 says Rosemarie announces she's pregnant at dinner," Natasha raised her voice, but kept speaking Russian. "She has the smug pregnant look about her and can't stop touching her stomach."
My line of sight followed Natasha's gaze to my cousin's wife. Natasha was right. Rosemarie was talking to my Mom, her hand always coming up to touch her stomach. Alex looked smugly proud of something too. I wrinkled my nose at the scene. This family really needed to stop breeding so much.
"$100 Jared says something inappropriate about it." I looked around to find my twin. He was very good at disappearing when there was work to be done. He wasn't very fond of Rosemarie either. I couldn't see him anywhere. Not that it was a surprise. He could have teleported to Paris to avoid helping set up for all I knew. I wouldn't put it past him either. He'd done that one year, but at least he brought back some good wine.
Natasha snickered and held out her hand.
"Done." Natasha shook my head with a smug smile. Jared better come through with being obnoxious otherwise I'd take the $100 off him. "Have you heard from Barton today?"
"Nope." I abandoned my napkin folding to look at my phone. It had been silent except for a few texts from Gareth. I looked again but there was nothing from Clint. Scrolling through my texts, I hadn't gotten anything from him in the last 2 days. He was either spamming me with texts, or completely silent. There was no in-between with Clint. From what he'd been saying, home life wasn't fun with the in-laws around.
"I wonder if he's killed his mother in law and has gone off grid to hide her body," Natasha said, almost sounding completely serious about it. "Maybe that's where Jared has gone as well."
I put my hand over my mouth to cover my laughter. Poor Clint. From the last few texts I'd gotten from him, his mother in-law was driving him insane. Apparently his father in-law wasn't much better. Clint was counting down the seconds until they left.
"Coulson said he was keeping him busy," I said, picking up another napkin to fold. Grams wanted a swan shape this year and I had to admit they were kind of pretty. "Here's hoping he's keeping him out of trouble as well."
I felt bad for Clint. He'd been stuck with Natasha and mine's shitty moods while we were in Germany. Now he was home dealing with in-laws who hated him. He couldn't catch a break. Natasha snorted and shook her head. She didn't need to voice what she was thinking. Nothing would keep Clint out of trouble. He was so lucky Mom took the blame for the Quinjet incident. Otherwise SHIELD might just execute him for the trouble he caused. At least Clint wasn't the one blowing up half a city. Jared still had that dubious honour.
"Is there anything I need to watch out for?" Natasha's tone turned serious, as she lowered her voice.
There was a lot more in that question that Natasha's didn't voice. She really didn't have to. 95% of my family were SHIELD and while she was a legend in STRIKE, there were a lot of people who still didn't like or trust her. No one in my family sprung to mind. Even before I knew Clint and Natasha, they were spoken of highly amongst my family. It was a little surreal Natasha was actually here with me, folding napkins this Thanksgiving. It'd only been 2 years ago when she was spoken about like a myth.
"Don't get drunk because your thoughts will get really loud when you drink," I joked, sending Natasha a reassuring smile. I wasn't used to this. It was always the other way around. Natasha was the one to reassure me. Or boss me around.
"Noted," Natasha said dryly, but there was a small smile on her face. "Thanks for persuading me to come out here. It really has been fun."
It had been. We'd been too busy to wallow much on what happened to us. While the farm work might not have been the best for our physical health, it did wonders for our mental health. Even Andrew had made the comment in his last email that I sounded like I was doing well after a fucked up mission.
"I'm glad you've enjoyed it." I smiled back at my best friend. "You've been away far too much this year. I've missed you a lot."
"It's been a crazier year than normal," Natasha said, pursing her lips as she looked out over the chaos around us. "At least this is a much happier story than what I thought was going to happen. I never said thank you for getting us off that cliff."
"You don't need to." I unconsciously reached up and rubbed my jaw. Natasha was right that things could have been much worse. "I have no idea how I did it."
"STRIKE Team Delta." Despite the emotional topic, Natasha shot me a grin. "That's the only explanation you ever need. I can't remember how Barton and I got out of Budapest alive either. But we did."
I'd never heard the full story of what happened on the infamous Budapest mission. It was spoken around the locker room like a ghost story. But no one besides Natasha, Clint and Coulson knew the full story. It was a level 7 mission, so I hadn't been clued in on it yet. It drove me nuts not knowing exactly what went on.
"I will get the full story of Budapest out of you one day," I said with a small grumble, but I smiled anyway.
"One day." The secretive smile on Natasha's face drove me a little insane. I hated that knowing smile she was giving me. I was cut off by any comeback by Mom hollering at me to go find my brother. Luckily for me, Jared was only hiding in his room and he didn't argue when Natasha and I found him.
Dinner was a crazy, noisy affair as always. True to Mom's word, she managed to have most things in a liquid form for me. The turkey and gravy smoothie she'd made was actually really good. The mashed potatoes were soft enough I could very carefully maneuver them in the gap in my back teeth and eat like a normal person. With a little encouragement from Jared, Natasha soon loosened up and joined in the conversation. As predicted, Rosemarie announced her pregnancy before dessert came out. Natasha's smug look was quickly wiped off her face when Jared piped up and asked if Rosemarie knew who the father was. If there wasn't a rule about no powers at the table, I'm sure Jared would have had something very unpleasant happen to him. While Rosemarie wasn't Enhanced, Alex's power was he could make a force field. He mostly liked to use it to make things explode or pick up things within the field and dump them on people's heads. He'd done it more times than I could count to both of us while growing up. I'm sure he'd take great pleasure in dumping something unpleasant on Jared for his snarky comment. Even Mom kicked him under the table for the rude comment.
I was thoroughly stuffed, thanks to Mom's skill with a blender by the time dinner was finished. It was a tradition to have a bonfire afterwards. Most of the kids were in the stages of going to bed, so the adults drank. Jared surprised me by producing one of my good bottles of scotch from our apartment, and one of Natasha's favourite vodkas. It was relaxing to sit around the fire, enjoying a good drink and listen to the conversation go on around us. As much as I warned people about how crazy my family could be, it was still my family. I was glad I could include Natasha in the crazy world of mine I kept hidden away. She was my family too. She deserved to have more people care and love her, just like I did.
It was midnight before I dragged myself to bed. Natasha and Jared were still up, though they'd retreated to the warmth of the lounge room. They were curled up on the couch together, watching Alien and I was not having any part in that. My dreams were vivid enough without adding things exploding out of my chest to my imagination. Despite the rocky start, it had been an amazing day. I was out like a light as soon as my head hit the pillow.
I woke up for no reason. One second I was asleep and the next I jolted awake. It was pitch black in my room and for a second I felt disorientated. The bed next to me was empty, despite the clock next to me reading 0330. Something felt wrong. I knew it wasn't Natasha missing out of my bed. But I didn't know what the hell it was. I got up, pulled on a clean pair of clothes and stuck my head out of the bedroom. The entire house was quiet. The only sounds were the creak of my footsteps and someone snoring from another bedroom. I held my breath and stood still, straining to hear for anything out of the ordinary. But there was still nothing. I rubbed my face tiredly and turned around. It was probably a weird dream that I didn't remember. I was about to climb into bed when I noticed a flashlight coming from Grams house across the ours.
Pulling on a thick coat, I grabbed my phone. I hesitated for half a second before reaching into the bedside table. There was a standard issue Glock in there. Natasha had put it in there when we first arrived. It was her safety net. She had trouble sleeping unless she had a weapon within easy reach. I was glad for it now. The grip felt unfamiliar in my hand but it was better than nothing. I was out the door and halfway out the front door before I thought about waking anyone else up. In my hesitation, the figure with the torch got closer.
"Kari, it's only me." Grams' voice carried across the quiet night. "I'm sorry to wake you but I need your help. I didn't mean to scare you."
I relaxed instantly, a shuddering breath leaving my throat. Grams came into view a second later, carrying a torch. I could barely make her out bundled under all the layers of clothes she had on. I looked outside a little closer and wasn't surprised to find a snow falling. The flurries were coming in thick and fast, leaving a decent dusting on the ground.
"What's up?" I asked, feeling my heart slow down to a normal rate. No wonder I jolted awake with such a fright. Grams using her powers to wake someone up was never fun, no matter how gently she tried to do it.
"Jump on the quad bike and head down the driveway," Grams instructed in a firm voice. "Don't hesitate, just go."
What the actual fuck? I wanted to stand there and argue, but I knew better. Zipping my jacket up, I nodded and was on the quad bike, racing down the driveway in less than a minute. Behind me, the lights in my parents house started to turn on. The ice cold wind whipped around my face as I sped down the gravel road. The actual driveway was 2 and a half miles long before you got to the road. It ran along the highway, so it wasn't completely off grid. But we were very secluded out here. No one in their right mind would think about robbing us.
A figure loomed in the darkness a mile up the road, walking straight down the driveway. Whoever it was walked along with purpose. They were my height and very well built. I came to a skidding stop, reaching around to pull the Glock out of the waistband of my pants. The headlights of the quad bike did nothing to illuminate their face. Whoever it was had a hoodie pulled around their head, obscuring their face in the shadows.
"Not the best place to rob," I called out, flicking the safety off. Grams sure knew how to make me feel useful by sending me down here to kick a robbers ass. "Hands up where I can see them."
"Kari?"
I nearly dropped the Glock in surprise at the sound of Clint's voice. Had I just imagined it?
"Clint?" I scrambled off the quad bike, nearly tangling my feet up as I hit solid ground. I abandoned the Glock in favour for running towards him. My feet skidded across the mud as I ran towards him as fast as my still broken ribs would let me. "What are you doing here?"
The closer he came, I could finally make out his face. Clint looked exhausted. His eyes were sunken and hollow. Even in the shitty light I could see how pale he was. He was sporting a few days of beard growth as well, something nearly unheard of for him. As soon as he got within arms reached he collapsed into my body. I wrapped my arms around him, staggering to support both our weight. As soon as we touched, Clint's body heaved like he was trying not to cry. He threw his arms around me, clinging to me like I was the only thing keeping him alive right now.
Clint buried his head into my shoulder, his choked voice saying something that I couldn't make out. His body heaved a few more times as he took in long shaking breaths. I was so stunned, it took me a few seconds to try and piece this all together. The way my ribs were hurting, I was very sure this wasn't a dream. But what was Clint doing here?
"What are you doing here?" I tried again, trying to untangle Clint from me. I wasn't successful at all. It only made him cling onto me even harder. I couldn't hear a word he had just said. "Clint, talk to me."
"She left me."
"What?" There was no way I'd heard him correctly. Did Clint really just say Laura had left him?
"Laura. She took the kids and left me."
It was like a dam breaking. The heaves stopped and Clint broke down sobbing. His entire weight fell on me, like he was too exhausted to hold himself up any longer. We both crashed to the ground in an ungraceful tangled of limbs. I held onto Clint while he sobbed in my arms. He felt like he was breaking apart in front of me. There was nothing I could do or say to fix this. So I did what he did for me all those months ago when my life shattered in front of me. I held onto him and let him fall apart in my arms.
Authors Note
So…..yeah. That just happened. Poor team can't get a break at the moment. It really has been a shitty year for all of them.
I'd completely forgot I had the majority of this written out already. It was only during a few moments of procrastination I found it. So yay for an earlier chapter than expected! And yay for procrastination?
Your reviews, follows and favourites all inspire me to write. Its always a thrill to get a new email notification of any one of them. I love hearing your theories on where you think this is going, your musings about the chapters or just hearing how much you enjoy it. It mades my day.
Until next time!
