Fortunately, Oliver was as good at catching unconscious bodies as he was quaffles, so I didn't split my head open collapsing against a desk. Quickly revived, I didn't have to be the guinea pig for the rest of the lesson as Quirrell expanded on the functions and defenses against various other curses. But I sometimes caught glances from him as if he was thinking about what torture to inflict on me next. What had I done to this guy?

While defense class was a nice distraction, I returned to my earlier conundrum when I overheard Ron Weasley complaining to the twins on the way into dinner, pantomiming an exaggerated raised hand gesture, "...trying to grab something off the ceiling. Was Percy that bad when he was a first year?"

I'd never had siblings, and in a lot of ways I envied the support network that the Weasley boys had. But I could see it from Percy's point of view as well. They seemed to be a family that loved sports, adventures, and pranks. If you were someone who didn't, there was probably no escape at home. I'd only had to share the tower with a bunch of Gryffindors for one night so far, and I was already planning places in the castle I could hide to be by myself. What if you were just in a family house, putting up with that for years with nowhere to go?

After dinner, I'd made a point of organizing my trunk in our bedroom, hoping to catch Percy in private. Fortunately, he stopped by, probably planning to grab some things and run to the library. He eyed me warily as he went to get books from his own trunk. "Those were some good stunners today," I told him, as nonchalantly as I could manage. "I don't think I could have kept my shield up much longer."

He considered a moment, kneeling and faced away from me as he sorted, then just said, "It was a team effort. The girls are strong casters, as well."

"Probably," I nodded, "but I could definitely tell the difference when yours hit."

"And yet," he grumbled, "your shield held."

"Like the professor said, it's just a question of styles," I explained. "If you gave me a wand, I wouldn't be able to even do as good a job as that Hufflepuff prefect did. This bracelet is purpose-built for shields, and so it's more effective than a wand, which can cast anything." I considered for a moment, "And I had to make it myself. Which gave me more insight into how enchantment works than looks like you would have covered yet in the Hogwarts curriculum."

He stood up again, books forgotten, and regarded me, "I wager you will have a similar story for how you just happen to get an O in each of your OWLs, while befriending the quidditch team, out-dueling a few seventh-years, and casually having time to tutor the first-years."

"Definitely not astronomy and history," I demurred, "they wanted to put me in with the first-years on both of those."

"I just do not understand you, Harry," Percy whined, "You have aurors claiming that you are a murderer, but the headmaster and our head of house bending over backwards to help you fit in. You seem to be muggleborn, yet somehow know more about runes and defense than anyone but the professors." He clenched his fist, "And somehow… somehow… when you go off on a rant about how magic works that has the professor thanking you for educating the class, everyone thinks that makes you cool."

"I'm going to come back to how you seem to think 'muggleborn' means that I should be incompetent," I said, having nearly interrupted him there, "but can I make an observation? I'm not trying to be cool. I'm honestly barely holding myself together, so I don't have time to worry about what other people think about me. I'm just happy your brothers haven't yet gotten everyone thinking I'm a murderer.

"What I do care about is being nice to people. I'm basically trapped in this castle until I turn 17, and maybe longer if Dawlish decides to keep riding me. I have to make enough friends to not go crazy with people hating me. I mean, I can't even begin to understand quidditch, but I listen politely because that's what Oliver and your brothers want to talk about. Maybe they'll decide they hate me next week. What I can't figure out is why you seem so happy with them not liking you."

Percy looked like he wanted to fight about it, then flung himself petulantly onto his bed, sitting to face me as he answered, "You think I never tried to make people like me? I spent years helping Oliver study, but it took a day for you to be his favorite lab partner. I was excited to get to be a prefect, sure, because it was recognition, but also so I could help the lower-years. Ron already has them ignoring me."

"I mean, I don't want to pretend I'm an expert or anything, since I'm pretty much just a giant magical nerd," I admitted, "but… have you tried to make friends with anyone non-academically? I mean, I also don't get why they're so excited about sports instead of literally rewriting the known laws of reality with a flick of their wrists. But for some reason they really want to talk about quidditch, and don't mind if you just let them talk about quidditch."

"I just cannot bring myself to pretend to care," he slumped down on his bed. "I get the thrill of flying. I find exploding snap and gobstones momentarily amusing. I can certainly appreciate music as a distraction or background noise. But when people only want to spend time doing those things in the best years we have to become experts at, as you say, rewriting the laws of reality… it just seems so…"

"Childish?" He nodded, granting me the point. "Percy, I get it. I had to grow up really early, for reasons I wouldn't wish on anyone else, and, if I'm being honest, I can be pretty childish sometimes too. I can't presume too much about your parents or older brothers, but I bet even if they were helping, you had to grow up fast just to counterbalance the twins…"

"Ron and Ginny are quite immune to reason and sense as well, on most days," he added.

"They're at least still pre-teens. Hopefully they'll grow out of it. But, my point being, you're all still young. It's okay to just be a kid sometimes. What are you afraid is going to happen if you take a break, maybe aren't best in the class at something, and find a hobby that's just something you do for fun?"

He sighed, and thought for a moment, then said, "Forgive me for saying, 'you would never understand,' when I expect that you would love to have more family, but… you would never understand. My eldest brother is a world-traveling curse breaker. He is in Egypt, exploring old tombs. The next brother just graduated and is off in Romania working at a dragon sanctuary. While here, both of them were excellent students, and Charles was the greatest seeker the quidditch team had in years.

"Then there are the twins. They are toweringly childish and annoying, but they are secretly brilliant enchanters, good at sports, and everyone seems to love them. Finally, Ginny is the first Weasley daughter in generations, the girl my parents were willing to have son after son to try to get, then stopped having children."

"And you're stuck in the middle of all that, with no way to stand out," I said. He nodded. "What about Ron?"

"I… am actually really worried about our Ronald," Percy admitted. "He has little hope of playing quidditch until Oliver graduates, and that seems to be all he cares about. While he is surprisingly brilliant at chess, that never seems to inform any of his other choices. I worry he will be miserable here, eventually."

By this point, I'd also leaned back on my bed, and after the initial confrontational stance we were having the kind of relaxed roommates conversation I'd sometimes had with Elaine. I thought about it, and then asked, "What do you want to do with your life, Percy?"

"Assuming I can achieve the requisite scores on my OWLs and then on my NEWTs, I should be able to enter the Ministry at a middle grade and then rise through the ranks over several years."

"Law enforcement? Healer? Diplomat?" I asked.

"Whichever department has an opening, I suppose. My father thinks that there might be an opening in the Department of International Magical Cooperation soon, where I could take charge of updating the British standards and regulations to the European level. We really do allow shoddy craftsmanship on things like cauldrons…"

I was speechless long enough to let him ramble on to even more mind-numbing fixation on bureaucracy. Finally, I had to interrupt him. "Maybe you're passionate about this and, if so, tell me to shut the hell up, but… are you really going to become one of the greatest wizards this school has produced this generation and then act like you're excited to work as an undersecretary in an office?"

"Well, it is quite a secure position. For all that we had to watch our spending, my father is relatively low level within the Ministry and is able to support a family with seven children on his salary alone. And once you begin to rise in the hierarchy, absent major scandals you have a guaranteed paycheck for life…"

"You're being too adult about things again, man," I insisted. "Thought experiment time. Through some magical accident in seventh-year charms class, right after you get all Os in your NEWTs, you get thrown into a parallel Earth with no way back. Your family is safe but you'll never see them again and they'll never know what happened to you. The only asset you have is your brain and your wand, with nobody having any expectations of you one way or the other. What do you want to do with your life?"

"Well… I mean, allowing that admittedly nigh-impossible scenario for the purposes of this thought experiment, the very existence of a parallel universe reachable by magic would seem to call into question several of the known magical laws, particularly elements of Gamp's laws. Assuming I could work in a laboratory with sufficient funding, just trying to unravel what happened to me would be a feat worthy of a lifetime."

I clapped, and said, "Congratulations. That is a real, honest answer. Doesn't the Ministry have a department designed to do exactly that kind of thing? Why aren't you angling to work there?"

"The Department of Mysteries does not publish their guidelines for admittance, so it has always seemed safer to me to pursue a more opportunistic strategy as it comes to job placement," he admitted.

"Are you making stuff?" I asked, remembering that he hadn't seemed to understand why I'd want extra potion supplies for my own creations. "Are you doing any independent research projects? Are you investigating any of the existing magical theories and trying to see if you can open up new possibilities?"

"With what time?" he asked, rhetorically. "I have three electives as classes and am independently studying the other two, prefect duties, and study for OWL year. I honestly worry if I can find time to get enough sleep."

I scoffed, "You've certainly planned out your life for a nervous breakdown and an early grave. I assume you're also in arithmancy. What's the other elective you're going to class for?"

"Muggle studies," he admitted, with a scowl.

"That look means you know it's worthless. If you really want the OWL, I'll teach you. We can do field trips. You'll learn more in five minutes walking around London than in a month of the class. Plus Divination independent study can't be that much of your time. And I'll help you study for OWLs, because I probably need you to help me anyway."

"Why are you so interested in my career and emotional well being, Harry?"

I had to think about it for a second. Why was I so interested? I'd come in here just trying to defuse whatever he was mad at me about. Was it that I suddenly saw someone that would be so easy for me to save from his own dumb choices? Maybe it was that I'd spent one day here and already realized that, in a school full of people that could do freaking magic, the awesome power of wizardry was treated as just another boring school subject to "skive off" of to go play sports, and Percy was one of the few that took it seriously. Maybe I did feel a little guilty for showing up and stealing what little thunder the guy had in our first class together. What I said was, "I don't know, really, man. It's just, I think you have it in you to be a magical badass, and I don't like that your brothers don't even see it and you're going to squander it all to be a bureaucrat."

He looked at me for a few seconds, as if to figure out if I was messing with him. But he eventually said, "Fair enough. I will certainly consider it." He was quiet for a few more seconds. "I am still angry at you for making me look stupid in front of Penelope."

Oh. Suddenly it all made sense. He was trying to show off for the girl. I grinned, "Percy, this is great! Aren't Ravenclaws supposed to be the genius researchers around here? Imagine how much you'll be able to show off for her when you let her in on your thrilling extracurricular research project…"