(A/N So a lot of people were upset with the last chapter and I feel like I should've clarified that you were meant to be unhappy. Shit is up with Percy and that trial was a sham. Annabeth only got pregnant because this is a parody fic, but don't worry. She's still going to fuck shit up.)


Annabeth liked to think that she was a good person. She saved the world a couple times, defeated a few monsters, called Hera a bitch to her face a few times, too. But that didn't mean that Annabeth wasn't about to murder her boyfriend. When she found him.

After being discharged from the hospital, Annabeth was pleasantly surprised to see that her car hadn't been clamped for illegal parking. But there was still the matter of her newborns to worry about. She had to stop by a mall and buy an extra set of everything─clothes, car seat, highchair and a crib. Annabeth was just glad that she and Percy had thought to make a large room when they'd first discovered that she was pregnant.

"Hey," she whispered as Luke started to cry. He had Percy's eyes. "It's okay, baby. I'm here. You're fine." She attempted to cheer him up.

Percy was so on diaper duty.


She couldn't find him. A week had gone by, and nothing. Nothing at all. She had searched as much as she possibly could, considering Luke and Silena. But there was no word from him.

"Percy," Annabeth whispered. She couldn't leave to look for him, her children needed her. "Where are you?"


"Look, Percy," Jason said. "I'm so sorry, man. We all thought that you'd just killed her in cold blood for so long."

"It's fine," Percy smiled charmingly. "I forgive you, bro."

"No, it's not fine," Jason insisted. "I should've realised─"

"It's fine, really," Percy said. "I don't mind. She fooled us all."

'What the fuck is wrong with me?! Why can't I speak?! Am I being controlled?! I must be. But by who─'

'They said she was working with Chaos.' 'Introduced me to Order. He's been trying to fight Chaos for years and asked for my help.'

'So. Order is the bad guy here? I think, probably. If he's accusing Chaos─didn't he create the universe?─ then he must be trying to infiltrate us. He's controlling me then. But how the fuck do I do literally anything when I'm here smiling bullshit smiles and saying Annabeth's evil?!'

"Hey, Seaweed Brain." Thalia met his gaze. "What's up?"

"Nothing much," Percy found himself saying. Thalia's eyes flashed. Percy grinned internally. "You?"

"Same. I was just thinking about your mom. You know she and Dave had a baby girl." 'Thalia, I love you! Dave!' Of course Thalia would realise shit's up. She knew Annabeth better than most people.

"I have a sister?" Percy asked.

"Yeah," Nico said. He and Grover both looked like everything was normal. Percy was so glad his friends knew that something was wrong, even after three years. "I remember when Bianca and I first met her. Her name is Estelle, by the way. Bianca called her ugly. She doesn't like babies. And that's funny considering that she and her boyfriend are going to have one soon." 'Bianca's dead. She was a hunter.'

"Tell her I say congratulations!" Percy smiled.

"Who are we congratulating?" Piper asked, her arm wrapped around Jason's waist.

"We were just telling Percy about his mom," Nico said.

'Amongst other things…'

Percy was happy. His friends knew that Annabeth wasn't evil and that something was up with him. Good.


"What the fuck is wrong with Percy?" Piper asked.

"Many things," Rachel muttered sarcastically.

"I don't know," Grover said. "But Percy's step-dad is called Paul, not Dave. And he knows that Bianca is dead. And a hunter. He isn't right."

"Could be mind control," Piper suggested.

"I'd say he's powerful enough to throw off a monster," Thalia said.

"He wasn't able to throw off an Eidolon before. Who's to say that he's gotten better?"

Piper jumped. "Jason!" she exclaimed. "We were just─"

"Don't bother," Jason said. He sighed. "I'm pretty sure that I was acting crazy these past three years. I… hated Percy for some reason. And I don't know why. But the second he started 'explaining' what happened, I felt… different. Like something left me. I didn't… hear something telling me that Percy was an evil dickhead."

"Nice to see that you've left the Dark Side, Anakin," Thalia remarked. "What if whatever turned you into a dickhead left you during that fucked trial and took over Percy?"

"We need to do something," Piper said. "Do you think Hazel was being controlled, too?"

"Without a doubt," Jason said. "It makes sense."

"Alright," Thalia said. She sighed. "Nico, go get your sister. And a bottle of whiskey while you're at it."

"Never took you for a whiskey person," Piper said. "Scotch, maybe. But not whiskey."

"Yes, because my bubbly personality controls my taste in alcohol," Thalia said.

"We're off topic," Grover said. "Why would they go after Jason and Hazel and not one of us?"

"Because you're close to gods," Jason said. "Nico hangs out with his dad a lot, Thalia's with Artemis, you have to deal with the Nature Council and Dionysus. Rachel has to deal with Apollo and there's also Piper's charmspeak."

"Okay, then," Thalia said. "Would this have anything to do with the prophecy?"

"Maybe," Rachel said. "Maybe that's what they mean by the vanquisher of Kronos being bound. The prophecy doesn't give much to go on."

"This is too fucking complicated," Piper said.

"We're demigods. What do you expect?"


Annabeth picked up a crying Silena. "Hey, sweetheart," she said. "Come on, it's okay. Mommy's here. You're fine."

"Is she?"

Annabeth's eyes widened. She reached for her sword, putting Silena into Luke's crib.

"Who are you!?"

"Wait! Sorry! That wasn't a threat! I was asking if she is okay!"

Annabeth froze. A figure, shrouded in black, stood in the darkness of her children's bedroom. "Who are you?!" she repeated.

"Right. You wouldn't recognise me with this on." The figure reached up, removing their hood.

"Lou?" Annabeth asked, lowering her weapon.

"Yes," Lou Ellen said. "Look. I can explain why we're here─"

"'We're'?"

"Hello, Annabeth Chase." Annabeth jumped. It was a voice─a fucking weird voice─ and seemed to be everywhere at the same time.

"That's Chaos," Lou grinned. Annabeth looked at her with widened eyes. "Right. I should probably explain."

"That would be nice," Annabeth sarcastically bit out.

"Hey, no need for the tone," Lou Ellen defended.

There was every need for a 'tone'.


(A/N I'm trying to hurt my characters, aren't I? So our guys know that shit is up and Jason is finally himself again. Also, Annabeth's going to kill somebody. And I know that I portrayed Lou Ellen as "fuck no. I'm not getting myself killed for you." but all will be revealed soon. And by that I mean the next chapter.)