Two updates in a week? A miracle!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.


Taking a deep breath, Hermione let the green flames engulf her, as she spun back towards Grimmauld Place.

Not just towards Headquarters; towards her downfall.

After Remus had rushed out of the home when she had started bleeding, Tonks had stood guard, while whatever assault was being inflicted on Draco took over Hermione as well. It had been one thing to feel his pain as hers when she could see it with her own two eyes.

It was another to know how vulnerable she was at every moment based on him and him alone.

When Remus returned and told her that Ronald of all people was responsible for the incident, she couldn't tell what was worse; the pain inflicted on her body, or the knowledge that the boys were back and knew everything. She had not really thought deeply about their return, they had only been gone a few weeks, after all.

However, they seemed to have been gone for the most consequential weeks of her life.

She had opted to stay at Remus and Tonks' place for the weekend, as planned. Despite her so-called Gryffindor bravery, she was not sure that she was ready to face Harry and Ron. At least, not without a plan.

Two days later, spinning through the floo network, she felt her cowardice resurface.

She still had no plan.

Hermione landed without grace in Grimmauld Place, tripping into the kitchen and coughing dust. She stood up straight, trying desperately to pull herself together, quickly realizing that she had no time to do that as two sets of eyes were watching her.

She coughed again. "Hey guys."

Harry's face melted first, while Ron's stayed stony. After a beat of silence, she couldn't help herself. She rushed forward and Harry met her halfway. She grabbed on, pulling him close, emotion overtaking her.

"Missed you," she choked out, face buried in his shoulder.

He put a hand in her hair, holding her gently. "You too, Hermione. You too."

She stepped back, smiling up at her best friend. He smiled right back, but his eyes remained wary. She couldn't read him.

She had always been able to read Harry.

Taking a deep breath and a step back, she glanced over at Ron. He was glaring at her, having not moved from his seat.

She let five seconds pass before she broke the silence.

"Can you not be mad at me long enough for a welcome back hug?"

His face remained serious, but she could've sworn she saw the ghost of a smile at the corner of his lips.

"Well, fine," he muttered, standing up and sweeping her into a hug. She held on tight.

"I'm glad you're alright," he mumbled close to her ear. "I… I didn't mean for you to get hurt."

She nodded, trying to keep tears at bay. A few escaped, and she quickly wiped them away as she stood back.

"We best get on with it, then," she said, heading over to the table and taking a seat. The boys followed her, sitting across from her.

Just like a court room. Ready for her trial.

Sighing, she lifted her wand and cast a silencing charm over the room.

Best no audience this time.

"So," she started, drumming her fingers on the table and desperately wishing she could sink into the earth. "Who wants to start?"

Ron glared at her for another moment, but Harry was the one who answered.

"I guess we can fill you in on our end first," he started, nervousness evident in his voice. "Then we can talk about your… situation."

Hermione nodded, thankful for the quick reprieve.

Ron's eyes narrowed further.

Harry glanced over at Ron, hesitating slightly before speaking. "We… well, we were getting nowhere, to be quite honest. That's why we came back. It quickly turned into camping with no general direction. We thought it would be good to regroup and… and get your input."

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Nowhere? You've just been… camping?"

"Well, maybe nowhere is a stretch," Harry answered, leaning forward. "We haven't gotten any further on the… Horcruxes… but we weren't technically in the woods the whole time."

"Technically?" she raised an eyebrow, despite herself.

Harry frowned for a moment. "We went to Godric's Hollow."

"Godric's Hollow?" she asked, surprised. "Why?"

Harry shrugged, glancing at his lap for a moment. "I don't know, I thought that… I just wanted to go. It's where my parents died, I wanted to see their graves."

Hermione had no response to that. She just understood.

"When we were in Godric's Hollow," Harry continued, looking back up. "We found Bathilda Bagshot's house."

"The historian?" asked Hermione, her voice betraying her interest. "I didn't know that she lives in Godric's Hollow."

"Lived," Harry said bluntly. "She's dead."

"Dead?"

"We found her body," Harry said. "She was just… decomposing. Gods, Hermione. It was disgusting."

She wrinkled her nose, trying to get the image out her head. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"But when we were there, we found a book," Harry said, glancing over at Ron again. The other man was still glaring at the table.

"I mean, Harry," Hermione started, hesitating. "She was a historian. I'm sure she had tons of books."

"It wasn't just a book, Hermione," Ron said, finally speaking. "It was a biography. About Dumbledore."

"She was writing a book about Dumbledore?" Hermione asked, trying to ignore the vitriol in Ron's voice.

Harry shook his head. "She wasn't the author. She was just sent the manuscript to look it over."

"Who's the author?" Hermione asked, as a sinking feeling appeared in her stomach.

Harry sighed. "Skeeter."

"That horrid woman is still writing?" Hermione asked, shocked. "I haven't even thought about her in years."

"Well, she's writing a book about Dumbledore," Harry continued. "It's… it's just awful."

"Oh, Harry," Hermione said, reaching her hand out towards him. He didn't take it. Pulling it back and trying to keep the hurt out of her eyes, she continued. "You can't believe a single thing that woman says."

"I mean," Ron piped in, eyes burning into Hermione. "She was right about the part where your new life soulmate tried to kill Dumbledore."

And there it was.

Hermione closed her eyes, saying goodbye to any last seconds of peace. "Would you like to talk about it?"

"Talk about it?" Ron spat out. "No, I don't want bloody talk about it. I want you to say it's not true. That Zabini, and Fred, and Lupin are all playing a prank on us because this is so fucking ridiculous, there's no way it could possibly be true."

"I can't do that," she replied, holding her hands together tightly. "I know that it's… quite a shock."

"Quite a shock?" Harry interrupted, eyebrow raised. "Hermione, I mean… you've been sleeping with Malfoy and are somehow magically bonded with him. I've been trying to understand, or see it from your point of view, but I can't."

"That's because there's nothing to understand, Harry," Ron said. "It's bloody madness."

"I'm not going to sit here and try to defend myself to you two," Hermione said, eyes fixed on her clasped hands. "What happened between me and Draco is complicated…"

"Draco?" Ron spat out. "You're calling that murderer Draco?"

Her heart sank. "I'm not going to defend him…"

"It's impossible to defend him," Harry said. "He killed Dean."

"I know," she whispered. "God, I know that…"

"He was a fucking double agent the whole time!" Ron exclaimed, banging his hands on the table. "I told you he couldn't be trusted…"

"I know!" Hermione snapped, looking up at them again. "I didn't intend for this to happen, it just did!"

Ron scoffed. "What, you just fell on his dick?"

Hermione flushed. "There's no need to be crass. Gods, you guys weren't here! You don't know what happened at all. I know that he was a double agent, but he helped me with the mark and the power when no one else did! He was the only one who would research with me, who would treat me like I wasn't some alien for this goddamn willow tree that I can't control…"

"He was trying to get you to go back with him," Harry said, arms crossed. "He would have done anything."

She shook her head. "He didn't need to do everything that he did. And this stupid connection, our soulmate bond or whatever, I didn't choose it!"

"But you did choose to share your magic with him," Harry said, as Hermione went white. "Fred told us. You chose to share that with him. You chose to get sexually involved with him, even after everything he's done. I know that you didn't know about Dean or him being a double agent until afterwards, but Jesus, Hermione. He's Draco Malfoy."

"I know who he is," Hermione said tightly. "I know who he is better than either of you."

"Because you fucked him?" Ron spat out, turning redder every moment. "Classy, Hermione."

She narrowed her eyes. "No, because it's more complicated than that. If you would just let me explain…"

"What else is there to explain, 'Mione," Harry sighed, taking off his glasses and rubbing them on his shirt. He always did that when he was nervous. "I mean, Fred told us everything about you being a pureblood, about Malfoy, about what's been going on. What could you possibly add?"

"It's my life," Hermione retorted. "I can add so much more than whatever summary you got from Fred. He's not me. He can't explain how it felt when Draco was tortured on the floor of his drawing room. It was like my own flesh was burning off my bones. Have you ever been hit by the Cruciatus?"

Harry flinched but kept his gaze steady. "No, but neither have you."

"Draco did, and that means I did. At least for now."

"Hermione," Harry sighed. "You're talking about the whole situation like you've just… accepted this. Accepted him."

"Of course, I haven't accepted it," Hermione cried out. "Do you honestly not believe that I am pouring my entire self into figuring out how to break this bond? I'm not taking this lying down."

Ron laughed humorlessly. "It seems like you taking this lying down is the entire problem."

Hermione's eyes narrowed. "What are you angry about, Ron? Are you angry that we got infiltrated, that I'm a target now because of my heritage, or are you just angry that I had sex with Draco Malfoy?"

"Fuck off, Hermione," Ron spat back. "I'm angry about all of it! But it sure doesn't help that you so quickly and easily spread your legs for that snake!"

"Ron," Harry snapped, looking between them nervously. Hermione was shaking.

"It is none of your business who I easily spread my legs for, Ronald," she seethed. "Not that it's any of your business, but it was only one time…"

"One time is too many!" Ron shouted, finally cracking. "Bloody hell, Hermione, how could you have been so fucking stupid?"

She fought back burning tears. "Stupid? I'm stupid? I'm not the one who ran into the fucking wilderness without so much as a thought or a plan and had to come back three weeks into a camping trip."

Ron's face was purple. "Rather camping that fucking a Death Eater."

"Ron," Harry hissed again.

"You're way out of line," Hermione spat at him, anger ricocheting from her lips. She saw red. "I'm sorry that I didn't ask your permission before I fucked him, but if your biggest concern in this entire situation is who I fell for, then you need to work out your own priorities."

She watched, almost in slow motion, as all the blood drained from Ron's face, and Harry's mouth popped open.

"Did you," Ron whispered, his body starting to shake as well. "Did you say that you fucking fell for that bastard?"

Hermione's lips parted in shock. Had she actually said that? "I… it just came out."

"Hermione," Ron said, voice deadly. "Look me in the eye and tell me that you aren't in love with that waste of space."

She stuttered, trying to find the words, forcing them to the surface, demanding that they meet the air.

Nothing came out.

Ron fell back in his chair, mouth gaping. "I… I can't talk to you." Before she had a chance to say anything else, he had stood up and stumbled out of the room.

Harry and Hermione were left in silence, allowing the confession to suffocate them.

The tears she had been forcing back finally fell.

"I… I'm not sure if I meant to say that," she whispered, her quiet voice echoing like a scream.

Harry wouldn't look at her. "I know you didn't mean to say that, but I'm not quite sure you didn't mean it."

Neither was she.

They continued to sit in silence. Hermione wasn't sure if it was minutes, or hours, before Harry finally sighed.

"I know that you didn't have a choice in some of this," he said, green eyes meeting green. "But you did choose him. At least once, in a very serious way. Ron and I aren't your keepers…"

"So, stop acting like it," she snapped. He paused, before nodding.

"It's not really the sex," Harry said. "Though the idea of you sleeping with him makes me want to rip his stupid limbs from his stupid body. It's that you gave yourself to him thoroughly. Ron's different than I am, but I guess, I could live with a slip-up, a drunk mistake, or just a stupid decision. But you are continuing to choose him."

"I've barely spoken to him since the Malfoy Manor raid," Hermione retorted.

Harry shook his head. "Doesn't matter. A part of you has chosen him. Whether it's your magic, or your heart, or whatever, you're still choosing him. There's a reason that damn willow tree chose him as your mate or whatever. It's not like he was the obvious choice."

Hermione didn't have an answer for him. Or at least, she didn't have an answer that he would accept.

"I love you, Hermione," Harry whispered. "And I need you, especially with the Horcruxes. You were right, we needed you. But I'm sure you already knew that."

She nodded. Of course, she knew that.

Harry sighed. "But this… this is a lot."

"It is a lot," she conceded. "Imagine living it."

Harry chuckled. "I don't envy you there."

Hermione smiled slightly.

"I'm going to have to get over it," Harry continued. "At least somewhat. Enough for now. One of the reasons that Ron and I came back was to… was to get you."

"To get me?" Hermione asked, confused.

"For the horcrux mission," Harry continued. "You should've been there from the start. You've been right the whole time. We need to do this. This is the only thing that will stop this goddamn war and I need you at my side to do it."

"You want me to leave with you and Ron?" Hermione asked. "I hate to break it to you, but I don't think Ron's going to talk to me again this century."

"He'll cool off," Harry said, unconvincingly. "It's just a shock. And honestly, it's not like this was ever going to be fun."

Hermione couldn't hold back her chuckle. "You've got a point there."

Harry smiled for a moment, before his face grew serious again. "This whole Malfoy thing… it's a lot to take in. And I know you've been dealing with it alone, and that it's hard. I'll try not to make it harder, especially since we're going to be camping together for the foreseeable future. But I'm not happy, Hermione. I'm angry. I'm confused. I'm hurt. But ending this war is more important than my feelings. Can it also be more important than yours?"

Hermione nodded, understanding intrinsically. "Ending this war is more important than my feelings as well. I can… I'll make sure that it doesn't come up while we are looking for the horcruxes."

"Thank you, and in return, I'll try to soften the blow with Ron," Harry said.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, until eventually, he stood up and made for the door. Just as he was about to leave, he turned back.

"If you really…" Harry started, before trailing off. Seeming to regain his strength, he continued. "If you really feel for that man, could you just leave it until we end this war? It might fade by then."

"Maybe," Hermione replied, knowing full well that whatever her and Draco had was permanent. "But I promise, ending the war is more important."

Harry nodded. "I did miss you, Hermione," he muttered. "You wouldn't believe how useless of a cook I am."

Hermione laughed. "I'm no better."

"Probably not," he replied. "But we need you, nonetheless. We want to leave in the next few days. I hope you… sort your business by then."

With that he left the kitchen, leaving Hermione alone with her thoughts, rapidly switching between constructing a plan to find Horcruxes, camping tips from her youth, and a blonde Slytherin who seemed to have invaded her life, possibly beyond repair.

However, repair was what you needed for brokenness.

And she did not feel broken.

Should she?


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