A/N: Happy first Advent everyone! I am still blown away by your incredible response to the last chapter. You guys are so awesome! A huge thanks to waterbaby for betaing and putting up with my breakdowns, as well as my FoodieHoodies and Lisa :)
This chap is for all of you and probably something you've been waiting for ever since those two saw each other… Enjoy!
(17)
It was all wrong. So very, very wrong. The letter, the wedding announcement in the paper. He shouldn't be here, shouldn't be looking for her, they should be on the road, they should be on their way to England, to a new life… Instead he couldn't get the words in the letter out of his head. Was this the end? No. No, he wouldn't accept this. He loved her for God's sake; he loved her more than anything. It wasn't what was supposed to happen. After all the crap he'd been through, after all Regina had been through, they deserved their happiness. He would find her, he would find her and unless she told him to his face that she never wanted to see him again, he would not accept the letter.
Robin held his breath and counted to ten, then let it out in a slow but steady flow. The first church had turned out to be a failure. He'd gotten out of his truck, had hammered against the church doors and stumbled inside, only to find it empty. Regina wasn't here, no one was and the place didn't look like it had just hosted a wedding. No flowers, no decorations, nothing. This wasn't the right church. Damn that stupid wedding announcement for not giving him a time and place. It could be held anywhere. Damn him for not going to her house when she didn't show up right away. Damn him for waiting so long. Damn her for writing the letter - as if a stupid letter could erase all the feelings he had for her. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it all!
Where was she? There was no other church here in Storybrooke… But the again, who said they would have to get married in church? It could be any place, really. The town hall, the ballroom, the country club… wait. Leopold was someone who would marry in style, who enjoyed showing off, to brag in front of his friends. The wedding must have been planned on short notice, otherwise Regina would have told him sooner about it. Robin refused to believe it had been her plan to dump him when she'd agreed on running away with him. Surely she could never be that cruel. There was too little time to rent a venue, to decorate it. This would only work, if… if the venue was already there. Yes, yes of course! The estate, the manor they were living in at the moment. There was enough space for a wedding, it was pretty, they had enough room to throw a party and everything else could be arranged on short notice with Leopold's means. He should have known, damn it. Now he had to drive all the way back to the other end of the city.
Robin broke several speeding laws on the way down to the manor at the outskirts of the town, not so far away from the spot they'd been supposed to meet this morning. Not much longer, only a few more miles down the road, then to his left and he was almost there when blue light and sirens flashed up behind him.
"Fuck!" he shouted, before he pulled over, his hands hitting the steering wheel hard. Why was everything going wrong today? Why was nothing working out in his favor, why was fate against him?
He kept his hands on the steering wheel, knowing from experience how aggressive police officers could get if they couldn't see the hands of the person behind the wheel. There was a knock on his window, an old man in a blue uniform and a golden sheriff star staring at him with a smirk on his face. Sheriff Spencer. Of course it would have to be him. Robin rolled the window down, a defeated expression on his face.
"Drivers license and papers." It wasn't a request, it was an order. He pulled out his driver license, which the sheriff took with a satisfied smirk. "Locksley is it? What a strange… coincidence."
"Sorry?" Robin gave him a confused look, but Spencer just shook his head, waiting for the papers. "The papers are in the glove compartment," Robin explained, a bit confused at the man's comment and when one hand carefully reached over to open it, the cold metal of a loaded gun was directed at him. "The papers are in the glove compartment, Sir," Robin repeats once again after bringing his hands back to the steering wheel.
"One wrong move, boy, and I'll blow your head off. Understood?"
"Yes, Sir," Robin mumbled, carefully opening the glove compartment and slowly pulling out a flat brown leather map which held the papers for his car. He handed them over to Spencer who tugged them between the front window and hood before opening his door.
"Get out of the car, hands where I can see them, Mr. Locksley."
With slow and deliberate movements Robin unbuckled his seatbelt and got out of the car, raising his hands above his head while the sheriff musters him with a knowing look. He knows this man, he has heard of him. Spencer's the reason why Regina couldn't tell the police about Leopold's physical and mental abuse. He'd asked her to go when he first found out, but she'd explained her situation to him, that she was powerless against Leopold's influence. They're friends, old friends, powerful friends and just when the thought hits him; Robin realizes this is no coincidence. There's a reason why Spencer was here. This street was one of the few in the town that was basically never patrolled, especially not by the sheriff himself. He had others to do this dirty work for him, but today was different. Bastards.
"Mr. Locksley you're aware that you were speeding fifteen mph above the limit?"
"Yes, Sir." There was no point in denying it, he had been speeding. He shouldn't have, but even if he hadn't, Spencer would have found a reason to stop him. He needed to get to Regina; he didn't have time for this charade!
"And you're aware that this is a criminal offense as well?" Robin simply nodded. "So may I ask why you were speeding in the first place? Are you aware that unauthorized speeding causes most the majority of traffic related accidents? So what's your excuse?"
He didn't have one; at least none that would satisfy Spencer in regards to letting him go. Telling him that 'My girlfriend is getting married to an asshole and I have to stop the wedding!' didn't seem like a fitting reason either. Spencer knew what he was up to, had probably been stationed here just for this reason, namely that should he in fact consider going after her, he would be stopped.
"I don't have one that would be good enough for you, Sir." Shoulders hung in defeat; Robin lets his chin drop down to his chest.
"Try me. I'm in a good mood today, boy." It was a lie if he ever heard one. Spencer was enjoying this, knew he was having the upper hand, and did this only to humiliate Robin. Just as he was about to answer, Spencer's phone rang and he held up a hand in order to silence Robin. With a smile, the sheriff listened to what was being said, before he answered with a short "thank you" and hung up. "Back to you, boy. You were saying…?"
"The woman I love is getting married today and I need to stop the wedding."
Spencer's eyes lit up, a mischievous smirk plastered on his face. "Oh, why didn't you say so? I'll drive ahead and make sure you get there safely, how about that?"
"There's really no need to…"
"Oh yes, there is Mr. Locksley. I'll make sure you'll arrive safely at the Blanchard's residence. Now get in the car and wait for my signal."
Bastard. The fucking bastard knew exactly what he was doing. Robin hadn't mentioned Blanchard's name, but Spencer knew. Fuck. Fuck, what was he going to do? Grimly, Robin stepped back into the car, waiting for Spencer to drive ahead. As he thought, the sheriff took his time, seemed to be taking forever to start his car and drive ahead… in a tempo that made Robin beat the steering wheel. Whether it was in order to teach him a lesson in not speeding or whether it was to make sure they wouldn't make it to the mansion in the next fifteen minutes, Robin knew the sheriff was playing with him. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it!
It took them a good twenty minutes to arrive at the mansion, a way Robin could have made in five if he'd been able to drive at a normal speed. When Spencer turned his car off at the beginning of the long oak framed driveway, Robin jumped out of his car and ran. He ran as fast as he could down the pathway toward the mansion where a ton of limousines and SUVs were parked.
There was not a soul in sight, everyone must be inside, everyone must be there, including Regina. The noise of an approaching helicopter made him pause and look up at the sky in confusion. What the… fuck. Shit! The backyard, of course, he needed to get to the backyard.
How he made it in the end, how he found the way through the mansion where neatly dressed up people from the staff were awkwardly looking at him he didn't know, but when he busted though the open doors to the balcony there she was… and suddenly he felt like all the air was knocked out of his system.
She looked gorgeous, angelic even in the loose white gown, which was flowing around her delicate figure and it tugged at his heart, made him want to run toward her through the multitude of people. Run, run, and run until he reached her to sweep her away from the horror of a wedding she was finding herself in.
But he couldn't, because as soon as he thought about running, he saw the indifferent look in her eyes, the indifference toward her surroundings. Robin slowly walked down the staircase that led down to the garden.
A pavilion was set up under the old oak tree, decorated beautifully with flowers and layers of ivory satin. The people had disregarded their chairs, were now standing and clapping, shouting their congratulations. Robin wished she would look up, wished she would see him, but her eyes were glued firmly to the older man in front of her who could be her father god damn it! The worst thing however was the fact that she seemed to be smiling, an actual smile that made Robin's stomach drop.
It was the way she smiled as he said something to her, the smile that had used to be preserved for him, the special one. She turned toward Leopold, her hand now covered by his, which looked wrong, so wrong, while her other hand seemed to smooth the fabric of the dress across her stomach for a moment.
That's when Robin thought back to the letter. "…Leopold is already so much kinder to me now that we really talked about everything. There was a lot of misunderstanding … It's time to let go, time to move on and become the woman I always wanted to be."
This was what she wanted; this was her happiness. Her happiness and his demise. Unable to move, Robin watched as the helicopter landed not far away from them, the whirlwinds of the propeller tugging at the decorations, making flower petals go loose. The crowd awed at the beautiful picture it created, especially as Leopold and Regina walked over to the helicopter, the petals engulfing her like a goddess of spring, making her look even more beautiful.
The newlyweds made their way into the helicopter, Leopold waved at the crowd and then they took off, leaving behind Storybrooke, the mansion, and the guests. Leaving Robin.
That's what he was thinking about the moment he made his way downstairs back to the ballroom where the other men were enjoying themselves. It was too hard to breathe, there were too many different feelings weighing on his chest. His hand clutched the banister of the stairs so hard his knuckles were turning white. Wrong, wrong, wrong, this was all so very wrong! After all these years she had the audacity to ask him that, to pretend she didn't know what he was talking about!
He was thinking of the day she didn't show up and left him with nothing but a freaking letter before she stepped into the helicopter after marrying that sonofabitch and flew off into a new life. With a man who abused her, with a monster! It'd been hard, so hard to accept what happened, so hard not to burn the letter and even harder to open up to another person after this. Robin had been destroyed that day.
She'd asked him to forget about her, but how could you forget a person you wanted to change your whole life for? How could you forget your first love, a love that ran so deep he knew he still wasn't over it? He'd been able to pick her out of so many women. Robin knew her - well, did he really?
Even after all this time he hadn't been able to forget her, thought of her often, especially after Marian had died. Why would she act like nothing had happened? Why would she act the way she did when she left him? This was all too confusing. She'd seemed so happy when he found her, had been so kind to Roland, to him, and then their kiss… Absently he touched his lips, let go of the banister, which caused him to almost miss the step. He stopped on the second flight of stairs, desperately trying to get himself together. There was no way he could show up like this down in the ballroom, but he couldn't leave either. Answers, he wanted answers, but he wouldn't be able to get them in front of the cameras without revealing them. What was he supposed to do?
Xxxxx
"Are you okay, sister?" Leroy asked her, his voice unusually considerate. Regina's lips parted, but she wasn't able to make a sound. Everything inside of her was struggling to realize what had just happened, was grasping for the situation to make sense. The worst was - she didn't understand.
"Are you serious now, Regina? Do you really want me to relive it? Fine! I was waiting for you at our spot, I waited all night and you didn't show up. I had the car packed, I had the tickets bought, I had everything ready. You didn't show - and when I got home, I knew why. After everything that happened between us, you dumped me. You left me, off to marry that rich son of a bitch who abused you. You. Dumped. Me. With nothing but a fucking letter!"
She didn't understand what he was talking about, was trying to put back together everything that happened all these years ago, memories which had burned themselves into her subconscious mind, haunting her, following her everywhere, especially in her dreams. What he'd said didn't make sense, no sense at all. What letter was he talking about? She would never... She'd loved him! For God's sake she'd loved him and deep down there was still a tiny part that couldn't and would never let go of him. There was too much that connected them, which bound them together for the rest of his life.
Regina rested her head in her hands, not caring about the fact she would ruin her hair or make up. Someone cleared his throat in front of her.
"Do you need a minute?" Leroy asked quietly, and she nodded without looking up. She didn't need a minute; she needed to get away from here. Her head felt hot and heavy, her chest so tight as if someone was squeezing the air out of it.
This was what it must feel like when someone crushed your heart, right? It was similar to the pain she felt all those years ago when she was standing in front of the altar, everyone expecting her to say 'I do' even though that was the last thing she wanted. But she'd done it to keep her child safe, to keep Robin safe despite the hope he would still come and save her and now… Now he was accusing her of dumping him. He'd made it sound so dirty, as if she'd treated him like a piece of garbage.
Her lips were still tingling, were longing for Robin but she couldn't see it happening again. He was gone. He was gone - again - and she didn't know why. Maybe it was her fault. Maybe she should have talked to him earlier. She could have prevented it all, should have put all cards on the table the moment he stepped out of that damn car.
The coward inside of her had stopped her from doing it. It was always easier to ignore instead of taking action, to let chances pass instead of risking another heartbreak. She'd let every chance pass, had dreaded it a bit even though at the same time she'd yearned for him, had enjoyed every moment they shared together not knowing how he felt about her. How did he feel? Was it really too late to fix what happened, too late now that the magic they'd once shared was lost?
Perhaps it would be easier if she just accepted it, accepted that some things couldn't be fixed. It's your own fault, Regina. You didn't want to see the truth, but it's all your fault. And there it was, her mother's voice of reason, prompt as ever.
A dry sob escaped her throat, the realization of the situation too intense to allow her to cry. Was it time to finally let go? To accept the fact Henry would never meet his father? He was gone after all, and she didn't expect him to be back.
"Regina."
The muscles in her back stiffened, and she had to force herself to lift her head to look at him. She wasn't prepared for the lost expression on his face, for his fidgeting hands and the teeth that bit his lower lip. He came back. She'd been one hundred percent sure he'd left again, he'd left her like ten years ago, but no, this time he'd come back. There he was, standing in front of her, not sure what to do. Well, that made two of them.
If she'd felt like someone was squeezing her heart before, what she was feeling now was even worse. "I..." She didn't know what to say. I'm sorry? I missed you? "I thought you left."
"I wanted to... Regina, believe me, I wanted to get out of here as fast as possible, but I couldn't. I just found you. And despite everything that happened… I'll be damned if I lose you once again."
There was a sudden change of determination in his eyes and then everything happened too fast for her to wrap her head around it. Robin took a few quick steps across the room toward where she was sitting. The moment his hands came up to either side of her face with so much gentleness and the way his lips pressed onto hers was followed by a pure release of emotion on both sides. She let out a sweet, surprised gasp, one that made his breath hitch, while she placed her hands on his biceps to hold him exactly where he was, not ready to let go of him any time soon. Their lips parted slightly, the tips of their tongue caressing each other carefully yet oddly familiar. Regina shuddered at the contact, the sensation so overwhelming she almost felt embarrassed when a small moan escaped her.
Her grip on his shoulders tightened and for a second she wondered if she could hold onto this moment the way she could hold onto Robin. It was only when Robin felt the wetness of a tear slip between his fingers and her cheek that he slowly broke the kiss and rubbed their noses together the way he always used to do it.
Regina didn't let go, kept holding on to him as he dropped down on the couch next to her, their foreheads still resting against each other.
"I need to know, Regina." Robin's voice wasn't more than a whisper. She didn't dare open her eyes, didn't dare look him in the face, just wanted this moment to last forever. "I need to know why."
The breath she let out was shaky, and she was glad she could hold onto Robin, otherwise she would probably be shivering from anxiety.
"You… you said something about a letter." For a tiny moment it seemed like he was trying to remove his hands from her face, but he didn't, for which she was glad.
"Robin, whatever was in this letter… I never wrote it." Even though she dreaded to see what was going on in his face, she finally opened her eyes in order to look up at him. Would he believe her? There seemed to be a fight going on inside of him. "I swear by everything I hold dear that I would never have broken up with you via a damn letter."
"I need the truth. I can't have you lie to me Regina."
Regina shook her head, squeezing his arms so he would look at her. She had no idea what he was talking about, but for the first time she felt like she owed him. He came back. He didn't have to, but he did, so she was going to tell him the truth. "I'm not lying, Robin. I wanted to come, I was about to leave the mansion, but Mary Margaret she… She sold me out to my mother and Leopold the night before. It's a long story, too long to share it all now." A story that involved him having another child, a child he didn't know a thing about. She would tell him, though not now, now really wasn't the time. If she dumped that news on him now she was afraid he would leave and never come back.
"They locked me up in the mansion and I had no way of contacting you. I was desperately hoping for you to come, you know? All night I dreamed of you breaking me out of there and taking me away to England. I swear I didn't write you a letter - and if I could have, I would have begged you to save me."
Blue eyes were staring at her in puzzlement and uncertainty. There was that wrinkle between his brows, the one he always used to get when he was trying to make sense of something. Right now, he was trying to make sense of her. It had deepened over the years that had passed, but didn't make him look any less attractive. In fact, the years had been kind to him.
"It doesn't make sense," he finally breathed, his thumbs caressing her cheekbones. Only now she realized that she was crying.
"Please, you have to believe me, Robin. I would never… I wanted to go with you, I wanted to start a new life with you."
"Yet you married him." It was like a slap in the face that left a bitter taste behind. Regina finally let go of his upper arms, covering his hands with hers.
"It's because I had no other choice, Robin."
"You smiled at him. You looked at him and smiled that smile, the one that I thought was preserved for me." Her head moved an inch to the left as she was trying to remember the moment. "It was right before you left with the helicopter."
Of course. Yes, of course she remembered.
"You made the right decision, Regina. Your son will have a good life." That's what Leopold had mumbled right after they said their 'I do'. That's why she'd smiled. She'd done it all for Henry, for her son, her everything. But something about the fact Robin knew this was bothering her. How? How did he know, unless…
"You were there."
He finally let go of her face, folding his hands in his lap. "I came. After I saw the wedding announcement in the newspaper, I came looking for you because I couldn't believe what you wrote me. I couldn't believe that you were better off without me. But then I saw you smiling at him and I thought…"
Sick, sick, sick, she felt sick. He'd been there, he'd been there watching her get married to the man who was responsible for five years of misery, who'd abused her and her son, who'd. Oh God. He could have helped her, could have taken her away.
"You were there and you didn't do anything?!"
He stared at her in bewilderment. "You know I do a lot of crazy stuff, but I'm not that kind of guy to crash a wedding yelling 'I object!' This was not a damn movie, Regina. Also, I was too late anyway. You were already leaving with the helicopter and you smiled at him goddamnit." There was too much accusation in his voice, much more than she could handle at the moment.
"What was I supposed to do? I was all alone, Robin, I had no one. Everyone was watching me and I smiled because…" No, no, she couldn't tell him why she'd smiled, not now. Dropping the bomb on this would make him even angrier. "Why didn't you do anything, Robin? I was hoping for you to show up and take me out of there the whole time."
All these years she'd imagined what would have been if he'd shown up, if he'd crashed the wedding and had taken her out of there. Now knowing that he actually had been there was too much for her to handle.
"What would you have wanted me to do, Regina? Go up against everyone alone?"
The comment made her swallow and took away a bit of her anger. Indeed, how would he have gone up against Leopold and his men, the countless security guards that had watched her like a hawk, made sure she was never more than two feet away from her husband? Even if he'd tried something, he would have failed. She'd done all of this not only to protect Henry, but also to protect him.
"I wasn't even sure you wanted me there, your letter said…"
In order to calm down and drown her bloating rage, Regina took a deep breath. "Robin, I need you to listen to me." His attention was upon her, soaking up every word. Slowly, she reached over to give his hand a gentle squeeze. Thankfully, he let it happen. "Whatever this letter said…"
"Every word of this letter has burned itself into my memory. I tried to forget it, but I couldn't. You said you were sorry that you couldn't come and that the whole summer we shared was one of the best things that ever happened to you, but that our love was not enough to keep you with me." He swallowed hard, every word cutting into him like a knife. "Regina, you told me that this was the best for you, that you can't disappoint your family or leave your mother and Mary Margaret behind. You made it sound like breaking up was the best for us, and Leopold wasn't so bad after all. I didn't understand, I really didn't, because of everything you told me, everything I've seen… to you it was all just a misunderstanding, that he changed. Regina, with you this letter broke my heart. It said 'It's time to let go, time to move on and become the woman I always wanted to be. I cannot be weak.' You told me to leave, to forget about you. And I tried, Regina, I really tried, but I loved you more than anything goddamnit." His hands were shaking now, were holding onto hers like a lifeline. Heartbroken, he looked so heartbroken and desperate for answers.
Regina blinked away the tears that kept falling from her eyelids, couldn't really believe what she just heard. He'd loved her. Knowing it and hearing it were two completely different things. Never in a million years would she have written anything this cruel to Robin. Though there had been one phrase, one little word through which she realized who would have. Her mother. 'I cannot be weak' sounded exactly like Cora.
Cora. It'd always been her. For some reason it'd always been Cora who stood between Regina and her happiness. All these years Cora had lied to her, had made her believe everything bad that happened was her own fault, that she'd put it on herself… How could her mother do this to her?
"It… it's like you're hearing these words for the first time," he whispered. As she finally brought her eyes up to his, Regina realized he was crying now, too. A tear was rolling down his cheek, losing itself in his scruff. All this unnecessary pain - all because of her mother!
"That's because it is. Robin, I…" It took her a moment and a quivering deep breath to continue speaking. "I never wrote this, never in a million years would I have written something like this."
"But it was your handwriting, Regina, it was…"
"My mother. I don't know what the original one says, but from what I could hear, this sounds exactly like something my mother would say. I've always been a disappointment to her, whether I married Leopold or not. To her, love of any kind is weakness." She'd always known her mother was cruel, but that Cora would go so far as to fake a letter and send it to Robin… she'd never put it past her. Well, it just showed how she didn't know her mother after all.
"What the fuck?" Robin was staring at her in bewilderment; she could see his thoughts running crazy in his mind. Memories, too many memories came crashing down on both of them at the same time, all followed by the question of 'what, if…'. "So you want to tell me all of this was your mother's idea?!"
"Well it wasn't mine!" she shot back angrily, finally letting go of his hands and wiping away her tears. "I told you all about how she thinks she's always doing what's best for me."
"But marrying you off against your will? Regina, you know this is against the law, right? You have to make her pay for it." He jumped up now, pacing the room, his fingers twitching with anger. "You can get both of them arrested for this, and you should after this. What kind of parent would do this to her child?!"
"I can't believe she did this either, Robin!" She couldn't, she really couldn't but despite everything that happened, Cora was still her mother, the only family member she had left. Their relationship was rocky to barely existent, but blood bound them together. "But what was I supposed to do?! I was stuck in a loveless, abusive marriage."
"You could have left!"
He made it sound so easy. Ha, as if she could have just walked out that door! She had a son to think about, Henry, whose safety had been used against her on a daily basis. It'd taken her two long years, multiple lawsuits, threats and restraining orders to get out of the hellhole she was in. And she wouldn't have been able to do it if Mary Margaret hadn't turned against her own father when she found out who he really was. God, even thinking about it left a bitter taste of bile in her mouth.
"It's not that easy, Robin. You have no idea what I've been through."
"I don't. But you have no idea what I have been though either, Regina. Seeing you getting married to that guy was just…"
"Is that why you never came looking for me, because you always thought I picked Leopold over you?" Tears were streaming down her face, dropping from her chin down onto her chest. Way too often had she imagined this moment, the moment she would see him again and they would talk about what happened. Of all the thousand scenarios and reasons, him thinking she'd picked Leopold over him had never crossed her mind. The sudden anger and helplessness made her feel even worse. "I… I can't believe this! I thought you knew how I felt about you. You knew what was going on, you knew he abused me. How could you even for one second? All this time I was hoping for you to come and find me. But you didn't. You never did."
"The letter said…"
"Fuck the letter!" she yelled, her voice thick with tears. "I thought you loved me! I thought you wanted me!"
"Of course I want you, woman!" Then he was on her, pulled her roughly against him and kissed her so hard it almost hurt. Her nails were digging into his shoulders, surely hurting him, surely leaving a mark, but she didn't care. He sucked at her lips; slipping his tongue inside the moment she opened her mouth. It was passionately, almost angry. Despite both of them sharing so much tonight, there were still too many unspoken things between them. Overwhelmed by the onslaught of emotions, they deepened the kiss, their tongues engaging in a teasing game of hot, wet strokes accompanied by moans and sighs. They only broke the kiss reluctantly, when the need for air became too much, their hearts pounding hard in their chests.
"I didn't know what to think, Regina. I should have known. I should have known that you'd never have left willingly," he whispered regretfully, still holding her close.
"You were everything to me, Robin."
"I'm so sorry, Regina. I'm so, so sorry, I should have known." He should have… but it was okay. They'd both made mistakes.
"I'm sorry, too." If she'd known, she would maybe have contacted him sooner, would have told him about Henry and everything that happened. Now it all made sense. He thought she'd moved on. She should have listened to Tink when she drove her up to Storybrooke, but he'd been with Marian back then, and she'd been pregnant with Roland, his son. His other son. Oh God, Henry. He needed to know about Henry, but now was not the right time for it. Now was not the right time to reveal to him he had another son, one she'd kept hidden from him for ten years. Robin had asked her to tell him the truth, but how would he react when he found out? They'd just found each other and she didn't want to risk it.
They held onto each other's trembling bodies, Regina even harder now that she had to consider Henry's feelings in all of this, both of them mourning the years they'd lost, the pain they'd been through. None of them wanted to let go, for none of them wanted to break the embrace they found themselves in. Regina had her face buried inside his chest now, her hands still clenched into his shirt, holding on for dear life as her body was shaking violently.
Robin's shaky breath and a few sniffed sobs were indication that he was just as emotional as she was, that all the years had left their marks on his heart as well. It was like both of them had been transported back in time, the last time they'd seen each other before everything had gone down.
Xxxxx
She was nervous. She knew she should tell him about what she found out this morning, should tell him she was pregnant with his child, but she didn't know how he would react. They were sitting on the couch, cuddled up in a soft blanket, her head resting on his shoulder. He was lazily stroking her side underneath the blanket, his thumb absently touching her stomach. All morning had she contemplated how to tell him, if she should tell him. They'd known each other for a summer, not longer. Why did everything have to be so complicated?
Robin let out a deep sigh, pressing a kiss against her forehead. She looked up at him questioningly. "What's wrong?"
"I talked to my family in England this morning."
"Are they okay?" Her heart rate increased and by the way he made it sound something horrible must have happened. His hand stopped for a moment, before he shook his head, cracking a smile at her.
"Everything's fine. Regina, I… I don't know how to tell you this…"
She closed her eyes. There it was, the moment she'd been waiting for. He would tell her it was over, that he couldn't continue like this, that they should break up, that the situation they found themselves in was way too messy, that…
"It's okay." She closed her eyes, praying no tear would slip out. To her surprise, he held her in place when she was trying to get up.
"Wait a sec. How about you listen to me before you start making up crazy assumptions in your head." Their gazes met. "I know you, Regina. And just to be clear, I'm not breaking up with you. I don't even know why you would think that in the first place."
A relieved sigh escaped her and she wanted to snuggle back into him, stopped however when he told her the following. "I want to leave the U.S. and go back. And I want you to come with me."
"You… what?"
"I want us to go to England, back to Nottingham and start off again. I want a life with you, Regina, and I want to take you away from the impossible situation you're in at the moment. You don't deserve this, you deserve better. I know it's going to be hard, but I can work and my grandmother is there and some other family, who would love to meet you and we will find a way, and…" Robin was rambling now, something about permanent residency and getting her a work visa, or if that didn't work they would find another way, but for Regina, only one thing counted. He wanted to take her away. He really wanted to take her away from the hellhole she was in, her and their baby.
It was a prospect of a future she could have never imagined a few weeks ago, but anything was better than staying here. So she shushed him with a quick kiss, mumbling: "Okay."
"What?!"
"I said okay. If I have the option to choose between staying with Leopold and my mother or going away with you, it's an easy decision to make. I want to be with you, Robin. Take us away." With us, she meant them, him, her and their unborn baby.
Perhaps it was unfair, selfish even not to tell him about her condition, but she had the future of her child to think about. Robin was a good man, she knew that. He would probably be happy about it once they got settled in.
"I was hoping you'd say that at one point… but I thought you'd put up a fight or something."
"I love you, Robin. I want to be with you, no one else - and I don't think we can have a future here. So… when can we leave?"
He laughed, happily laughed as he pressed her flush against him, peppering her fast with sweet little kisses. The knot in her chest loosened while relief washed over her. This couldn't have been timed any better.
"I'm serious. Can we leave now?"
"Give me two days to arrange everything and meet me at midnight the day after tomorrow at our spot with your passport and everything you need. I'll get the money and drive us down to Boston with my car. I'll have to figure out a few things, but…"
"I'll be there." They kissed each other, excitement bubbling up in each of them at the sudden prospect of a future together, far away from Leopold, her mother and Storybrooke. Everything would be fine. If only they'd known.
