Thank you so very much for all of the kind and wonderful reviews for chapter 1! I can see that you guys are ready for this sequel. I do hope it lives up to the first story. I thank you for helping my muse gain momentum with those reviews. They are very appreciated and all cherished. I do hope you continue to enjoy the story!

Chapter 2

"Mummy? Can I have a sucker?" Penny sweetly asked from the backseat. Anna shook her head and glanced at her through the rear view mirror.

"No, Penny. It's too early in the morning."

Penny crossed her arms tightly across her chest and heavily sighed, before pulling up her foot, taking off her shoe, and throwing it across the car. It hit against the window next to Lucas, making him cry.

"Penny Green!" Anna shrieked, thrown off guard. She pulled over to the side of the road and turned to face her daughter. The little girl had her lower lip jutted out and eyes sharply narrowed. Normally she looked just like Anna, but in these moments she had a striking resemblance to her father. Anna swallowed hard.

Penny was not doing well. In fact, Penny's behavior was becoming worse and worse. The therapist said it could be a multitude of reasons, but that it was most likely the loss of her father that caused her acting out. From the moment of Alex's death, Anna had tried to make Penny feel safe and explain his disappearance as much as she could. At first, Penny had been fine. But as time went on and the realization that he was never coming back truly hit her, her behavior had begun to change.

It broke Anna's heart. Her daughter was hurting and she didn't know how to help her. She had her in therapy and gave her as much attention as she could, but nothing seemed to be working.

Anna took several deep breaths, before speaking.

"Why did you throw your shoe at your brother?" Anna tried to calmly ask. Penny shrugged her shoulders, while kicking her feet against the seat in front of her. The thumping of her feet against the leather made Anna's skin crawl. Her nerves were shot.

"I didn't mean to throw it at him. I wanted to hit you," Penny replied, cocking her head to the side with her mouth curling into a sneer.

"Penny, that isn't nice," Anna stated. "That sort of behavior doesn't deserve a day at the park." Penny threw her hands down next to her and shook her head.

"No! I….I'm sorry, Mummy! Please! Please, let me go to the park!"

"Park! Park!" Lucas happily agreed.

Turning away from her children, Anna covered her face with her hands. Why was everything so difficult? There was a time where she knew how to be a mother, but lately it seemed as though she was just grasping at straws all the time. The death of her husband along with the realization of what he had been doing had changed everything. She often wondered how she had been a better parent while married to an abusive husband than now when she was free of him.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Penny's feet continued against the seat.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

"Stop it, Penny! Stop kicking the seat!" Anna screaming, turning back to face her. Penny's lower lip began to tremble and soon a loud sob escaped her lips, making Anna feel like an even worse mother.

"I…I'm sorry, Penny. Mummy shouldn't have yelled at you. We….." She paused, not sure what to say. "Let's just go to the park. You'll sit out for four minutes and then you can play, alright?"

"O…okay," Penny sniffled.

Anna took in a deep breath and slowly let it out, trying to soothe her nerves. She turned back to face the front and the tears began to flow freely from her eyes. Quickly, she began to wipe them away so neither of the children would notice.

Pulling back onto the road, Anna drove in silence to the park. But every few minutes, she could hear Penny sniffling and choking back a sob. Anna parked at the park and turned back toward her daughter.

"I love you so much, Penny. I can't even tell you how much you mean to me," Anna told her. "We can't throw things at the people, especially the people we love."

"But Daddy threw things at you when he was angry and he loved you, didn't he?" Penny's innocent question made Anna's shoulders tense. Her brows furrowed and she swallowed down the lump that was beginning to form in her throat. Anna had known that Penny had witnessed some of the abuse there at the end, but this was the first time she had brought it up. Despite how much Anna had wanted to protect her from it all, she had failed.

"No," Anna honestly answered. "He didn't love me, but he did love you." Penny locked her lips together pensively.

"So I can throw things at people I don't love."

Anna's head shook. "No, you cannot. We don't throw things at anybody. Your daddy did mean things, Penny." Anna had decided to always be as honest as possible with Penny about her father. She didn't want to talk badly of him outright, but she also didn't want Penny to grow up thinking he was wonderful only to be hit by the truth when she was older. It was hard finding the balance, but Anna knew this was one of those times where she had to tell the truth.

After the ride to the park, Anna wasn't sure she had the energy to get out of the car. But she didn't have time to change her mind, because John opened Lucas' door and happily said hello to everyone.

"Good morning! Who is ready to play?"

"Play!" Lucas agreed. Anna gave John a tentative smile and slowly got out of the car. He unbuckled Lucas and pulled the boy into his arms. Lucas immediately rested his head against John's shoulder. Anna was almost convinced that he had forgotten Alex and believed that John was his father. The boy was always at such ease with John.

Of course Lucas had only been nine months old when Alex died. And Alex hadn't been a baby person. He hadn't really given Penny much thought until she started walking and was able to play. Penny had been his princess, but Lucas had just gotten some smiles here and there and a few cuddles. The loss of Alex had not been significant to him.

Anna unbuckled Penny and held her close to her chest. "I love you," she murmured into her ear.

"I know, Mummy," Penny said into Anna's chest. "I….I'm sorry I was mean like Daddy." A knot formed in the pit of Anna's stomach.

"You're not like your daddy," Anna strongly stated. "You are my sweet girl. My sweet Penny." Anna held her tighter, trying not to cry. "Now go play."

"But I thought….."

"Never mind that, just go and play," she said, putting Penny down. Penny didn't have to be told twice and she ran off to the climbing structure.

Seeing his sister playing, Lucas asked to be let down and went to follow her. He wobbled on the uneven ground and attempted to follow Penny up the side of the structure. John walked closer to Anna and could tell she had been crying.

"What was that all about?" He asked Anna. A loud sigh left Anna's lips and she shook her head.

"I…..this is all just harder than I thought it would be. I'm failing Penny. I worry…." Anna allowed her words to dissipate into the air and began to chew on the inside of her lip.

"You are a wonderful mother, Anna. You are not failing Penny."

Anna could only sigh.

"I called Elsie on the way over here and asked her if she could watch the kids this afternoon," John began, deciding it might be best to change the subject. "I thought you might want to go by the cemetery for a little while today."

The fact that John remembered the importance of today made Anna's eyes well with tears. She pressed her lips firmly together to control her emotions and nodded her head.

"Yes…that….that would be nice. Thank you."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

After the park, the four of them went for ice cream at the small place down the road. John held Penny on his shoulders for the walk and Lucas wobbled behind trying to keep up with them both. During the walk, Anna stayed back and watched her children with John. They both were quite smitten with him. They had known John for over a year and he always treated them so well.

Watching the three of them together, made Anna's heart leap in a way she couldn't explain. The spark from their former relationship years and years ago still lingered between the two of them. It was something she couldn't deny. So seeing her children get along with him so wonderfully made her feel more complete.

But she couldn't be with John. Not now. Not really. She was a broken shell of a woman.

John opened the door for Anna and she walked into the building, taking Lucas' hand to help him over the small step. John placed Penny down and she rushed to the case to look at all the flavors.

"Chocolate chip, please!" Penny nearly yelled.

"Chip! Peas!" Lucas chirped.

"Two children's scoops of chocolate chip. And for you, Anna?" Anna glanced over the flavors, but shook her head.

"I'm not feeling very hungry right now, but thank you," she replied. John eyed her carefully.

"Are you sure?" Anna forced a smile on her lips and nodded. "Okay, then, I'll take a scoop of chocolate chip, as well."

Anna led the children to one of the tables while John got the cups of ice cream. He brought them to the table and both of the children dug eagerly into them. John chuckled.

"Two kiddos after my own heart," he lightly stated. Once again, Anna's heart leapt. When again would she ever find someone to love her kids as much as John did? And not only that, a man who loved her fiercely despite it all?

"Penny for your thoughts?" John interrupted Anna's internal musing. Penny laughed.

"That's my name!" She giggled.

"Ah, yes, can I give Penny for your thoughts, Anna?" John played along, making Penny laugh even harder.

"You'd pay double that not to know them," Anna quietly replied. She grabbed a small paper towel and began to wipe down Lucas' front. He had dropped a big spoonful of ice cream on his shirt.

"John, who is your favorite princess?" Penny asked, bouncing up and down on her chair. John feigned deep thought and shook his head.

"I don't know, Penny. Who is yours?"

"Rapunzel! She has long hair and hits bad people with her frying pan!" Penny exclaimed.

"Ah, well then she's my favorite, as well," John answered.

"No, silly, you can't have the same favorite. You like Moana!"

"Moana is a good one," Anna agreed. "Yes, I think she would be your favorite," Anna added, giving John a smile.

"If you both say so. What about Lucas?"

"He likes Ariel," Penny simply answered. "Mummy likes Anna since their names are similar, but Anna isn't a princess. She's a Queen."

"Alright, now. Eat your ice cream before it melts."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

They dropped the children off with Elsie and then headed right to the cemetery. John remained back and watched as Anna walked to her eldest son's grave. He hated the pain that he knew Anna held on her shoulders and wished there was a way he could take it all away.

Anna kneeled in front of the small grave and placed her hands on the stone. John looked away, not wanting to impede on Anna's moment with her son.

"You can come and sit with me, if you'd like," Anna called out to John. He felt honored to be allowed in this moment and came up next to her. Slowly bending down, he sat next to Anna. He was surprised when Anna's fingers linked with his and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I…I didn't protect him," Anna murmured.

"Anna, Michael's death was not your fault," John strongly stated. "It was no one's fault."

Anna shook against John and she buried her head into his chest.

"It was my job to protect him," Anna said into his shirt. "Alex was right. I failed."

John gently grabbed Anna's shoulders and pushed her back to meet her eyes.

"He was not right. He was very wrong, Anna. You did absolutely nothing to cause Michael's death. It was a tragedy and I am so sorry you went through that. And I am sorry that Alex put the blame on you for all of those years, but he was wrong."

Anna's hand covered her lips and she stifled a sob. Wrapping her arms around John's neck, she pressed her forehead against his shoulder.

"I can't get him out of my head, John. Everyone tells me this, but I….I can't stop hearing him tell me how it was my fault. And I can't stop believing him. How wasn't it my fault? He was in my belly."

John wrapped his arms around Anna and held her tightly.

"Alex was in your head for years, Anna. It'll take time, but you'll come out on the other side. I promise you that." Anna lifted her head up and bit down on the side of her lip. She wasn't sure he was right. Despite all the therapy and support she had received, it seemed as though things would never be normal again.

"And Penny? How do I protect her? You told me Alex would hurt the children and I didn't believe you, but Penny…." Anna's breath hitched in her throat. "What if she ends up like him? She…shes's so angry."

"She won't," John promised, brushing his finger across her chin.

"But nature verses nurture, John. What if nature wins out?"

"You are her mother, Anna. She is a sweet child. There isn't an ounce of evil in her, just pain. And you are doing everything in your power to help her through that pain. I can promise you that she will not turn out like him."

Anna's lower lip quivered, but she slowly nodded before falling back against John.

"Will you hold me for a little while?"

"Absolutely."

To be continued...

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