In All My Dreams I Drown
"Hm," Bruce hummed as he flipped through the papers Naraku gave to him. Naraku accepted that he was at a dead end and until he could redo the extractions, he was going to continue being stuck. So, he decided to show Bruce what he was dealing with in his samples, but kept the existence of the gem and blood solutions to himself. Naraku unlocked his phone and sighed. Jade hadn't updated him since the previous Thursday when he carried her to her meeting with Eric. In her last text to him, she was pleading with him to tell her what happened on the roof. Naraku was unsure if he wanted to speak about it ever again, let alone to her.
'The less she remembers about it, the better.'
"What in the hell is this?" Bruce asked dramatically. Naraku glanced up, assuming Bruce had reached the pictures he took of his purple microbes.
"That is my problem." Naraku replied calmly, plucking a piece of fuzz from his pants and flicking it away from him.
"You're positive you didn't stain them? Or Jade?"
"Yes." Naraku sighed. "Even if that was an issue, that doesn't explain the amount of diatoms, though."
"No kidding. I can make out a few of them, but yeah, no, you're right. This is impossible to count." Bruce pulled the second picture out from the folder and his eyes widened again, shaking his head. "Does it ever end?"
"Indeed. About twenty centimeters from the bottom up is completely normal. No purple color and no excessive amounts of multiple species."
"Is there a gradual increase?"
"Barely. It's almost instantaneous. Well, instantaneous for lake turnover and sedimentation rates."
"Right." Bruce took the next picture out. It was Naraku's fully intact organic samples. "Same issue here. I mean, these slides and pictures aren't completely useless to you. You could calculate the average size of each species within the field of view of the microscope, along with the amount of microspheres, and at least get an estimation of about how many of these things are on each slide."
"It's difficult to do that when I cannot identify the individual species from one another, though some of them I have identified and counted to the best of my ability. I can try to calculate the amount of each, but the number is going to be inaccurate."
"Everything we know in science today was inaccurate when first observed. If I wasn't able to obtain exact coordinates, I would take being told what I'm looking for is somewhere north of where I'm standing as opposed to just being told good luck. It gives you something to build on." Bruce explained strongly. Naraku had to agree with him and nodded. Something was better than nothing. "This is just the first core they've sent you, right?"
"Yes. It's the core from the northeast quadrant. They're sending me the northwest one in November. The next two will be sent at the beginning and towards the end of next semester."
"Have you found any articles whatsoever about this particular lake? Anything?" Bruce asked worriedly.
"No. It's mentioned in a few articles about Japan's different lakes, which state basic facts, but there is nothing exclusively about this lake in great detail. At least, not from what I can find." Naraku glanced at his phone again. Was Jade avoiding him?
"Well, because you're just a student, you might not have access to everything in the archives." Bruce said, grabbing a pen and scribbling down a few notes on a notepad. "I'll search. I have clearance."
"Alright."
"Will they be sending you soil samples?"
"Yes."
"Good. Contact them and ask them to send identified plant samples and tree cores from the oldest trees they've found, too. Uproot the entire plant, bag it, tag it with the coordinates, and send it this way. Multiple samples from around the entire lake. Coordinates with the tree cores, too. The plantlife will likely yield more answers."
"I will. So, my current goal is to extract what I can and wait for you to find more information." Naraku stated with a heavy sigh. He was normally a patient man, but his samples were driving him insane.
"If there is anything in that lake. I don't see how that lake can have any nutrients with all of the microscopic life ingesting it." Bruce chuckled. "This lake is annoying to hear about, absurd to look at, most likely dead on the inside, and it's salty, so it seems you've found your soulmate."
"You think you're funny."
"I am. Also, I have a list of places and organizations on campus that could use a strapping young man like yourself as a volunteer. "
"Unnecessary. I've already committed my volunteer hours to other, more obscure options." Naraku retorted with a smirk. Bruce groaned and rolled his eyes.
"Those poor, unfortunate souls. Don't forget to have someone sign off to prove that you did do it."
"Anything else, Mother?" Naraku asked sarcastically as Bruce reorganized the papers and pictures back into the folder.
"I'm sorry. Who got you into this situation again?"
"Sesshomaru."
"Yourself, asshole."
"Hm." Naraku looked away as he crossed his arms. "Have you heard from Jade?"
"Not for a few days." Bruce answered, but then his eyes narrowed with suspicion. Why?"
"No reason." Naraku looked back at Bruce blankly. "Did she mention when she would return?"
"No. Eric told me you were carrying her around last week." Bruce said, pushing Naraku's black folder across the desk. Naraku grabbed it and stood up.
"And?"
"What do you mean, "and?" It's unlike you. You've been acting stranger than usual since the whole incident."
"I have not."
"If you're concerned about her, message her. Call her. Don't go around behind her back to find out and make it seem to her that you don't care."
"I don't for the most part. I just care to know if she will return soon enough to assist me or not."
"Well, then, ask her yourself." Bruce replied with a cheeky grin. "Give me about a week to find something for you."
"Fine." Naraku opened the door, but turned back to Bruce, glaring at him. "I don't care about her like that. Don't spread rumors about me through the department."
"I do what I want, just like you." Bruce responded, still grinning. Naraku decided to leave before his temper shoved him into an argument he wasn't prepared for.
Naraku's drive home was quick. He wasn't stopped by a single red light. He chose to return home since Sesshomaru was scheduled to use the lab for the next few days. His two classes rarely required attendance, which was a plus. So, staying home and away from others seemed like an appealing idea.
"Yes, yes, you're hungry," Naraku sighed heavily as the guinea pig's excited, high-pitched squeals rang throughout the apartment. Naraku knew some of the excitement was a greeting, seeing as he was the only other living creature the guinea pig was exposed to, but it was loud. He fed the pig a carrot and sat on his couch, checking his phone again. There was an email alert for a copy of another paper he requested through the university's library a week prior, but nothing from Jade.
'I can check her page, I suppose.' Naraku realized, typing in her gamertag on his phone and waiting for the results. The first link led to The Pack's website, which featured information about the community, how to join, who sponsored them, and individual, "About Me," pages for every current member, which also included their social media updates. He tapped WeedWolf's page and scrolled down. He saw many comments about her being treated unfairly by, "Alpha," and how WeedWolf should be the figurehead of The Pack. He saw more comments wishing her a speedy recovery and many others reciting her quotes or posting links to their favorite moments of WeedWolf.
'Does she realize she has an army at her back?' he wondered when he saw that thousands of comments were aimed at her positively. There was one negative comment and that person's account was deleted because it had been blown up by the other thousands who loved her. All Jade had to do was point her finger and these people would attack without a second thought. Naraku knew she wouldn't, though. It wasn't in her nature. He guessed she had no idea how many of these people worshipped her. She probably assumed they were just being kind or showing support for the community by supporting her.
'No updates from her, though. Her last one was before the extraction weekend.' Naraku exited out and locked his phone. When he closed his eyes, he saw her bloody, enraged face. He felt her pulling away from him as he held her back. Her screams haunted him the most, though. Whether he was sitting quietly while reading or dreaming while sleeping, the echoes would seep into his mind and ears. Even when he was lifting, he would lose his focus and he even stumbled during his sprint because his legs weakened immediately.
"Hm." Naraku hummed with displeasure, looking back at her page. He saw one particular comment being bumped to the top of the list. It was a link to a video. The person who posted it added the comment, "WeedWolf almost died before and she survived, so she'll survive this." Naraku tapped the link and turned his phone sideways to maximize the video screen.
"Oh my God," Jade's voice was strained by laughter. "My face hurts! Hahaha, my face, my fucking face hurts! I'm so glad I'm recording this!"
"Maaaaaan, that was some home-grown, organic bullshit." Koga griped.
"Y-Your...your body just," Jade ran out of breath and cried out while slapping her desk. "Your body just cartwheeled across my screen!" The video began to rewind to the moments before Jade's outburst. She and Koga were teamed up in a first-person shooter. Jade was behind and to the side of Koga, letting him draw fire while she provided cover fire. A large explosion roared and flames covered half of the field. Just as Jade said, Koga's armored character was caught in the blast and his airborne body cartwheeled pathetically across Jade's screen. She began laughing hysterically and the video returned to the spot before it flashed back.
"You gonna be okay?" Koga asked half-skeptically and half-humorously.
"It hurrrrrrrts!" Jade cried. Only the top of her head was visible in the camera's sight.
"Breathe already!" Koga urged when he heard Jade go silent. Her hand slapped the desk once more and when she gasped, her head fell completely out of sight. A large thud followed and then silence. Koga's character was frantically protecting his partner's character, spraying bullets in all directions. Koga was additionally trying to read chat comments while shooting. "Wait, what? She passed out? What? Jade! Jade, come on! Wake up!"
'Did she hit her head?' Naraku wondered, watching as Koga's face morphed from frustrated to worried.
"Holy shit." Koga choked when he heard Jade's light moan and curse. "Jade? Jade are you okay?"
"Wha-what...happened?" she asked slowly.
"Uuuuh, well, you laughed so hard that you fainted, I think. Is your vision blurry?"
"No. I think I'm okay now." Jade responded, her head appearing in the camera's sight again. She was still smiling as she readjusted her headset and shook her head slightly. "Well, that's embarrassing."
"New rule; you're not allowed to laugh anymore." Koga shot playfully. Jade reached up and rubbed her head.
"Yeah, well, fuck...oh," Jade's expression turned serious when she looked at her hand. Naraku already saw red color matted in her hair. "I'm bleeding. I think I hit my head."
"Alright, I'm coming over there to take you to a doctor." Koga insisted. "Sorry, guys. We'll have to pick this up later." And, with that, his screen went black.
"Yep. This happened. Sorry, everyone. We'll tag you back later." Jade chirped with a crooked grin. "I still see his stupid cartwheeling body playing over and over in my head."
The video ended and Naraku caught himself sighing with relief, which made him feel extremely dense. Of course she was fine. The video was originally posted two years ago.
'I don't care. I...do not...care. I've done worse to her with a smile on my face.' Naraku pocketed his phone and walked into his office room. He sat at his desk and began reorganizing the restricted notes. No matter how much he studied them, they revealed the same minor details of something bigger and nothing more. But, he still read them anyway.
"Maybe I overlooked something," Naraku said in a low voice, starting with the biologist's notes once again.
He read for hours. His room turned dark from the setting sun, so he turned his desk lamp on, leaving the rest of the room in darkness. Occasionally, he would stare at his purple and pink blood solutions and pick them up to swish them around and hold them against the light of the lamp.
'They're so vivid. I've never seen anything quite like it. Even with dim light, they shimmer.' Naraku thought, placing the purple solution down into its slot. He stared at the pink one intensely. Though it had been sitting still, the pink liquid appeared to be stirring, almost writhing, due to the reflected light.
'Is there a difference between the two other than color?' Naraku pulled open a drawer and grabbed one of his small plastic pipettes. He walked to his kitchen to grab a cup and his bottle of vodka and returned to his desk.
"I must be losing my mind." Naraku said to himself, chuckling. He sucked up a small drop of the pink solution into the pipette and ejected it onto his tongue. "Oh!" He almost jumped out of his chair. It was sweet! Not overwhelmingly, though. It was a gentle sweet, almost like a drop of honey. Then, his mouth became warm, as if he sipped freshly brewed tea.
"Damn." Naraku realized he had essentially swallowed the drop instead of rinsing it out with the vodka. The taste was so unexpected and soothing that he forgot what he was doing in the first place. Naraku closed his eyes when the warmth radiated through his body. His muscles relaxed so suddenly that he slid out of his chair and hit the floor.
'What the - I can't move!' Naraku realized with terror. Every time he tried to move his arms or his legs, a tickling, numbing sensation occurred in the limbs instead. Then, he began to calm down. He should have felt some level of panic; an adrenaline rush, muscle tension, a racing heart, especially since he couldn't move or speak, but his body was hypnotized by the sensation of relaxation. It was disconnected from his mind and his command.
'I'm...tired.' Naraku's last thought sank with him into a deep sleep.
His fingers were the first parts of his body he could move. When he coiled them into his palm, he gasped. It was sand that his fingers dug through! He still couldn't move much and he could hear the gentle splashing of waves washing onto the beach nearby.
'I'm back here? But when did I get here? Did I ever leave?' Naraku tried to lift his head, but his entire body was a block of lead.
'Fantastic.' A stronger wave had washed up faster and farther than the others, soaking him and the sand beneath his body. When a second wave did the same, he began to worry. Was the tide rising? The third wave washed up even farther, causing his body to slightly sink into the sand.
'Come on! Move!' he tried to scream to his body, but again, it refused. 'What was that?' Naraku quieted his mind. It was faint, but he heard a voice. He knew he did. Then, he heard a gasp and a giggle.
"What is that?" a young girl asked with terror.
"It's a person - or a body." a young boy answered. Naraku felt the tip of a stick poke him twice in the back before the third stuck him harsher. "Didn't anyone teach you not to lay face down in the water?"
"If he's dead, he can't answer you, dork. Let's go find someone to help." the girl urged.
"Why? He's dead. The tide will take care of him for free."
"What if his family is worried about him?"
"Maybe they should have taught him not to lay face down in water."
"Maybe he was sick and passed out!"
"You can go find someone if you want." the boy answered sternly. "I want to see how decomposed he is."
"You're a freak!" the girl shot harshly. "I think I hear Mom calling us."
"She's calling you."
"Which includes you since you're with me! Come on, Naraku!"
"Fine. I guess he'll be here a while." the boy replied with a sigh. "Moron."
Naraku heard the children's footsteps growing quieter; one set was quick and worried and the other set was slow and uninspired. Naraku had it figured out now; it was a dream. That's why nothing made sense and why he was reliving one of the few interesting moments from his wretched childhood.
'But, why am I the body?'
Time passed by, or, he assumed it did. The waves were starting to slowly drag his body to the ocean, and that took time, so time was certainly moving forward. He was just waiting to wake up. He thought after fully realizing it was a dream that he would wake up on his floor, but he didn't. He was still immobile; trapped in his own head within his head.
"Oh," someone gasped. "No, no, no, again?"
'Jade?' Naraku's eyes snapped open.
"Why am I here? I thought I was," Jade asked, her voice laced with confusion and terror.
'Why is she here?' Naraku was equally confused. His arms pushed him up and Naraku felt his body turn ice-cold. 'I didn't do that.' Now on his feet, Naraku turned and spotted Jade limping away, hugging herself. Steadily, he followed her, placing one foot in front of the other in a prowling manner. 'I'm not in control!'
"Am I back in a coma? Can I wake up?" Jade continued, her voice shaking. Naraku knew she was crying now, her breathing frantic, and yet, she pushed on. Her injured body could barely lift her legs, so her tracks left thick lines in the sand instead of solid, individual footprints. Naraku continued to follow her, pretending her lined tracks were a balance beam and holding his arms out to, "balance," himself.
'I'm stalking her! She's injured and I'm...not in control.'
"Is someone there?" Jade stopped walking and lifted her head. Naraku continued his balancing act, seemingly uncaring that she heard him.
'Keep walking, Jade.' Naraku urged, fighting to open his mouth. His mouth did open, but he did not speak; he grinned widely.
"I'm alone," she sighed.
'Look behind you!'
"I usually am." Jade said somberly. She did turn towards Naraku, but if he could have physically gasped, he would have. Her eyes were closed, blood dripping from them like tears. She also had blood dripping from her nose and mouth. Jade continued on her aimless path. Naraku's body stopped its taunting advance and dropped its arms. The legs then picked up their pace, no longer pretending to balance.
'This is a dream.' Naraku reminded himself. A deep chuckle spilled from his mouth in reply.
"Jade!" his voice called out. Jade stopped moving and turned towards him.
"Naraku?" she asked back.
'This isn't real.'
"You shouldn't be walking around in your condition." Naraku's voice softly scolded.
"I was...I didn't,"
"Shh, it's alright now." he reassured her gently.
'I don't speak to her like that.'
"Will you help me?" Jade asked him, wiping the bloody tears from her face. Her efforts were in vain; her eyes continued to bleed. Naraku's hand rested under her chin, gently tilting her head back.
"Of course." Naraku's voice answered sweetly, but Naraku knew his own tones and that one was bait. "I will gladly put you out of your misery." Naraku's tone shifted from sweet to serious.
"What?" Jade stepped back, but Naraku quickly reached out with his other hand, both wrapping around her throat strongly. He forced her down to her knees, then onto her backā¦.
His eyes snapped open and Naraku was back on the floor of his spare bedroom. Sunlight was spilling into the room through the single window. His breaths were frantic and heavy. He couldn't tell if the trembling in his body was due to him regaining muscle control or from the stress of his dream.
"It was just a drop of," he tried to tell himself, but he had made his decision. Naraku stood up and grabbed the tubes of solution, shoving them into the bottom drawer of his desk and slamming it shut.
'When they dispose of the chemical waste from the labs, I'm tossing them with the waste. I'm not equipped to deal with them any longer.' he thought angrily. He marched out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him. Naraku pulled his phone out and his thumb hovered over, "Call," and then over, "Message," on Jade's contact screen before he locked his phone instead.
"It was a dream. I didn't hurt," he cut himself off, remembering he had hurt her. He simply used a different method. "She's fine."
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The strain her tangled, brown hair placed on her arms was outrageous. She tried to pick it out, used a stronger shampoo and conditioner, and even brushed her hair in the shower, thinking her hair would be easier to manage while it was soaked. No. Jade grit her teeth and pulled the brush through, but she finally gave up when she realized she was actually out of breath. It made her roll her eyes and snicker at the same time.
"At least I can walk better." Jade whispered to herself. She checked her phone and groaned. There were a few hours to go before her appointment with the specialist the hospital recommended to her. She wanted a morning appointment, but it was either today or wait two more weeks. Jade took one last look at her tangled hair in the mirror
'I have time to get it chopped off. I'm not dealing with it anymore.' Jade decided. She tilted her head back, examining the bruising around her neck. It looked worse, but the mix of brown and yellow with a greenish tint indicated it was healing. Gently, she dragged her fingers across her neck, shuddering when she remembered her dream from the previous night. She heard his voice, felt his hands, but somehow, it didn't seem like Naraku. He had voiced his impulse to strangle her many times in the past, but he never tried it or even pretended to try it to upset her.
"Just a dream. Not real." she reassured herself, grabbing her phone, keys and walking out of her room. She had gone from walking like a ninety-year-old with two hip replacements to a sixty-year-old with one hip replacement. It was progress to her even though everyone still looked at her the same way; concerned and overly-sympathetic. Jade limped into the living room and saw Kagome organizing papers on the dining table.
"Oh, hey! You're up early." Kagome said with a gentle smile. Jade could sense the worry from the way Kagome's eyebrows slightly furrowed together.
"I think I've slept enough." Jade replied. A small, "mew," sounded from below. Jade looked down, watching Kirara slowly circling in and out of her legs.
"Kirara is happier now that someone has been home with her more." Kagome commented, flipping a stack of papers around.
"I'm glad she's happy and all, but I don't like her smacking my mouth with her paw when I'm sleeping. Or laying on my face and swatting my hair."
"Aw, she's just showing her love."
"She knows I can't reach up and stop her. She's abusing me." Jade said, demonstrating with her hands that she could only bend them up to her shoulders.
"Speaking of abuse, we all missed you in the lab last week." Kagome retorted, flashing Jade a wide-eyed, "save me," expression.
"Um, I don't want to talk about him right now." Jade replied, feeling her voice cut out as her throat tightened in response to the sound of his voice in her head.
"Oh, sorry." Kagome cringed slightly. "Have you talked to anyone about any of this? Professors or classmates?"
"Not in great detail. I solved things with the department, so now I'm just waiting for the okay to go back from a doctor, which is today hopefully. I've already almost caught up with my assignments." Jade explained. She decided to keep her discussion with Sesshomaru a secret. It was going to take a while for her to mull over what he told her, both what happened and why he wasn't upset with her for what she did to him.
"Well, if you need to talk, Sango and I are here."
"I get that, but I still don't remember anything."
"But you're still stressed because you're not making money," Kagome pointed out. "We aren't blind."
"That's normal. Anyone would be stressed in this situation." Jade shrugged. "Besides, both of you have told me you have the bills handled, even though I still have money saved up."
"I don't think you understand what I'm trying to say,"
"Um, if I have bad feelings, talk about them with you guys,"
"Yes. Talk. More talking. You're not talking much and it worries us. That was a scary situation. You could have never woken up."
"Yeah, but I wouldn't have known that. I was having a damn good dream, actually." Jade replied, her dream house appearing in her mind, only to be replaced with the cold, dark, wet place. "Mostly."
"What kind of good dream makes you hate dripping noises?" Kagome asked skeptically, her hands resting on her hips.
"Okay, hear me out," Jade began with a nervous laugh. "That isn't the strangest thing coma patients have developed after waking up."
"So, because other people have had worse, you don't think yours is a big deal? Is that what I'm understanding?"
"No, just that it could have been worse for me and it wasn't, so I'm not upset about it because it didn't happen."
"What about what your professor is claiming that you did? The assault?"
"I have no reason not to believe him and the papers from the hospital agree that my physical injuries weren't severe enough to cause a coma. If something with my health made me snap, then I'm going to find out why so I can stop it from happening again."
"Oh. I guess that's a good way to approach it. Your aunt said that you've never had those symptoms before, though."
"No, but a lot of illnesses can still develop even if you didn't have symptoms before. Mental ones have been known to, uh, manifest in people when they reach their early twenties." Jade explained slowly as she absentmindedly rubbed her chest. "I don't like that it happened, but it did."
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"Would you guys be alright with her shadowing your group for this experiment?" Bruce asked three of Jade's classmates. They each glanced over at her, nodding and shrugging collectively.
"Thanks." Jade said to them as Bruce placed a stool beside their table. The wooden stool was a tad taller than she liked, so it required a bit more effort on her part to sit on. Her new group members didn't seem to notice her struggle, though.
"Alright, everyone. I'm going to set you guys free to start your experiment. I'll be in and out of the room dealing with some business, so I asked one of my grad students to assist with questions or issues." Bruce announced, raising his voice over the clatter of glass tools being placed on the tables of the lab.
'Oh, no. Not him. Please.' Jade looked around the room, but she didn't see any long black hair.
"Hey, can you hold this?" the blonde woman asked. Jade blinked and flinched, but she nodded and held the glass flask with both of her hands. It was at that moment Jade noticed the trembling in her arms and hands and the dull pain growing in her lower back. Her group finished wiping down their table and placed two blue towels on the surface, placing their glass instruments on them. The blonde woman took the flask from Jade and smiled. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah." Jade replied, looking back at her. She had green eyes, too, though hers were pale; more of a gray with a green tent as opposed to Jade's pure, leafy green ones.
"I'm Jane." she said.
"Oh, I'm Jade."
"That's funny. Our names are almost the same." Jane said with a smile. She glanced at Jade and sighed. "If you need to copy someone's notes for the days you missed, you can copy mine."
"Thanks. I can take pictures of them after class."
"That's smart. I never even thought about that." she replied, staring at Jade with wonder. Jade nodded, but looked towards the door when she spotted movement. Sesshomaru was walking in, adjusting the sleeves on his pristine-white lab coat and Jade exhaled with relief. When his golden eyes found her green ones, Jade smiled and waved at him. He immediately approached her, weaving between the tables and folding his arms behind his back.
"Do you have a question?" he asked her.
"No. I was just waving to say hi." Jade responded in a small voice. Sesshomaru frowned briefly, but he reined his expression back into a calm one.
"Hi." he said back quickly. Jade couldn't help but to snort.
"Your face is looking better." Jade told him, pointing at the fading bruise.
"It might be because I'm wearing makeup to hide it." Sesshomaru told her evenly.
"Oh." Jade looked down, gripping the ends of her oversized lab coat's sleeves.
"No." Sesshomaru ordered. Jade looked back at him, frowning. "It looks better." he said before turning to assist a group that called for his help. Swallowing her guilt, Jade pulled out a notepad and pencil from her pocket. Her arms couldn't handle a normal notebook, so she had to improvise.
"He's cute." Jane chirped. "His poor face, though."
"He's something." Jade retorted, taking another look at Sesshomaru, who seemed like he wanted to be literally anywhere else at the moment. Jane wasn't wrong, though. Jade also found him cute recently. Mostly because he was very socially awkward. Sesshomaru's idea of an interesting conversation was silently listening to the other person and then simply saying...nothing. His eyes spoke for him and they usually said, "You're boring me." He was a bit more talkative with Jade. Instead of nothing, he averaged out at about five words per conversation with her.
'He's definitely nicer to be around than Naraku.' Jade admitted. She turned back to her group and began scribbling down the weight numbers.
Within minutes, the room was filled with the aroma of ethyl acetate as each group worked to dissolve their benzil samples. Light chatter kept the room from falling silent. Jade tried to focus on the banter of her group, or on Sesshomaru, who was sitting at the front of the room with his eyes closed and his arms crossed. Flipping back to the first page of her notes, Jade attempted to understand what she had written, but the words, which she understood, were not connecting with each other to form a coherent concept. The aches in her body were unbearable. The stool didn't help her case, but Jade also hadn't sat upright for a long period of time since before her hospitalization. It was part of the reason why she hadn't streamed any games recently. The burning pain began in her lower back and slowly crept up her spine, becoming a sharp, deep pain between her shoulder blades. Shifting back and forth, she tried to flex and stretch the pain away, but as soon as she switched sides, the other began to hurt again. Her arms gave up and her hands landed in her lap, plopping the notepad and pencil out of her hands.
"Why?" Jade whispered with a groan, staring at the floor. It was three feet below her, but her muscles screamed three-hundred.
"Oh, I got it," Jane insisted when she heard Jade's irritated sigh. She slid off her stool and picked up the fallen utensils, handing them to Jade, who smiled.
"Thanks."
"Are you sure you're okay? You look sick." Jane pointed out. The other two group members, a man and a woman, looked over at her, too.
"I'm not one-hundred percent, but I'll be okay." Jade said, waving her hand dismissively. She felt the sweat forming on her brow and used her sleeve to wipe it away.
"Well, everything is ready. We just need to wait for this to dissolve." the man stated, leaning over his notebook to finish his notes.
"Do you guys know what I heard the other day?" Jane asked, lowering her voice as she leaned in.
"Uh, no?" the other girl replied.
"One of my friends was heading to his Physics class and he said that a huge fight broke out on the main floor a little over a week ago," Jane revealed, pointing at the ceiling where the main floor sat above.
'Oh no, please,' Jade's entire body tensed up and she felt the familiar sting of cold fear spreading through her skin.
"Yeah, I heard something similar from my professor. She said she wasn't allowed to give details and that paramedics were called. It must have been a fight to the death or something." the man added, scratching his beard.
"I wonder if our cute lab assistant had anything to do with it. His face is bruised." Jane said softly.
'I have to go! I have to go!' Jade's eyes searched for Sesshomaru, who had walked across the room to another group. She waited for him to look over at her, but he was too drawn into the other student's lengthy question. 'Is he reciting the entire fucking O-Chem book?'
"Hey Jade," Jane called out. Jade quickly looked at her, her shoulders shrugging with terror. "You know him, right? Was he involved?"
"Uh," Jade choked out, her head snapping in Sesshomaru's direction once more. This time, he did look at her and his expression grew serious when he saw hers. "I mean, I was, that was, I was sick," Jade stumbled over her words. Part of her wanted to tell the truth, but her instincts screamed at her to run. Sesshomaru was heading towards her now.
"She has bruises, too, and she's been out-" the bearded man cut off when Jade clumsily slid from the stool, but ultimately, she tripped over it and spilled to the floor on her belly. Her eyes screwed shut from the searing pain, and a high-pitched ringing sound filled her ears, but it didn't prevent Jade from hearing all of the stools wailing as they scraped against the floor, alongside gasps and confused chatter. Steadily, Jade pushed herself up, trying to pull her knees beneath her so she could stand, but they refused. Her body was too scared and shocked to move. Two hands gripped her upper arms and held her weight as she bent her legs to prepare to stand.
"Slowly." Sesshomaru told her. Jade glared at the floor, at her feet, and at her chest. Her body shook and she felt faint, but Jade swallowed hard and finally straightened upward, locking her knees in place. Her eyes scanned each classmate's face; concern, confusion, terror, were the majority expressions and one face was hidden behind cupped hands where only her wide eyes stared back at Jade.
"I," Jade's vision blurred and she immediately looked down as her tears dripped onto her chest. "I don't fight,"
"Get back to work." Sesshomaru ordered the class, his tone even and strong. Even his voice was more stable than she was and it drove her mad. "Can you walk?" he asked her in a low voice.
'If I could, I would have ran out of here by now,' Jade lamented, but she didn't want to respond to him with such bitterness. She settled with shaking her head, "No." Every bit of energy she had was being used to prevent her from sobbing and screaming.
"Did one of you upset her?" Sesshomaru questioned with suspicion. Jade had been fine when he first spoke to her, so he didn't think she would randomly try to run away, especially in her current condition.
"We were," Jane began, shaking her head. "We were talking about the fight that happened upstairs and he was asking about her bruises-"
"She fell down some stairs." Sesshomaru interrupted dryly. Jade let out her first sound. It sounded like a cough and a sneeze. When he saw her shoulders bouncing, he realized she was giggling. She looked back up at him, teary-eyed with her hands cupped around her nose and mouth and her eyebrows knitted together with worry.
"It...hurts," Jade choked out, her voice muffled by her hands.
"Then why are you here?"
"I just want to catch up."
"It's difficult to learn when you start crying because someone looked at you." Sesshomaru scolded her. Wiping her tears, Jade nodded in agreement.
"I'm sorry, guys. I guess I'm not okay." Jade said as she turned back to her group. They each shook their heads and spoke at once, telling her it was fine, and they were sorry, and they would help her catch up when she was feeling better,
"Go home, Jade." Sesshomaru said, stepping to the side. "Take the elevator so you don't fall down anymore stairs." Jade coughed and laughed simultaneously, but she was able to move again, much to her relief.
000000
"Sooooo, what? Are you seriously just going to sit there silently and waste an hour of both of our lives?" the older man asked, spinning his pencil between his fingers. Naraku glanced up from his phone and both of his eyebrows rose.
"I'm reading for my research, so this isn't wasting my time." Naraku replied, looking back down at his phone. He was reading into the connections between the brain, the nervous system, and muscle control limits. He was sure that could answer why Jade had strength and speed that she normally didn't have.
"You do realize that I can report back to your boss about your lack of participation, right?"
"You do realize that is all I need to sue you and the university for every penny you're all worth, right?"
"You have to participate or,"
"No. The agreement I signed specifically stated to attend therapy sessions; not attend and participate. The papers I signed here to be accepted for therapy sessions explained a confidentiality clause that I'm sure you are well aware of. If you say anything to anyone about what I say, unless I am threatening to cause harm to myself or others or you are ordered by a court of law, you are breaking a code of ethics put into place to protect my privacy." Naraku recited. "So, for two hours every week for six weeks, we are going to have quiet time together."
"Why are you so defensive?"
"Cute." Naraku said, staring at his phone. The therapist could toss all the bait he wanted; Naraku wasn't going to bite. He heard the man sigh heavily as he began scratching notes down anyway. Naraku chose to ignore that, too.
'It's possible that her mental state was exacerbated by the solution, which severed any inhibitors set in place by the golgi tendon, the spinal cord, and the brain to protect the muscles from overextending. Without those, her muscles can be used at full capacity, but can injure themselves, which explains the tears in muscle and tissue along her arms and chest.' Naraku made sure to type it into his phone's notepad to add to his notebook later. It was going to be his last entry in regard to his pink and purple solutions. The therapist scribbled more words down.
"You don't want to make any comments about why you're here?" the therapist asked.
"No." Naraku answered, continuing his typing.
"I'm not with them, okay? I want to help you."
"You're persistent."
"I don't want you to waste this opportunity."
"Well, I do." Naraku retorted. He pulled up an article about plant growth and returned to silence. The therapist sighed heavily. He was an older man of fifty with graying brown hair, thin-rimmed glasses, and he exhibited a caring, father-like persona, which was why Naraku found him to be especially annoying. Any figure of authority automatically drove a nail under his skin simply by existing. Being forced to see this father-therapist was the cherry-topping to Naraku's foul mood.
"Will you at least tell me about your research?"
"Sure. I'm conducting various social experiments to observe and conclude how many times, on average, I'm required to say, "Blow me," before you actually blow me or you realize this is going nowhere and give up."
"I've been doing this longer than you've been alive."
"Doing what? Blowing your clients?"
"How about we have a direct conversation without you deflecting or attempting to provoke me because you don't know how to cope with your feelings?" the therapist shot. Naraku grinned.
"How about you blow me instead?"
"You can't do this forever." the therapist sighed.
'Watch me.' Naraku dramatically pointed at his crotch with both index fingers while silently mouthing, "Blow me."
Once Naraku was set free from his therapy prison, he walked over to the science building to begin setting up for the experiment for his worthless students. It was usually Jade's task to prepare the lab, but she wasn't there that day and Naraku had no idea if she would ever return. Bruce just laughed at him when he asked about her again the previous day.
'Did she transfer to a different lab?' he wondered. Shaking his head, he pushed through the setup, banishing any thoughts that had nothing to do with the experiment. He finished quickly since it was going to be a simple experiment and decided to eat before class started.
'Why did I buy a salad? I didn't even want salad.' Naraku exhaled harshly, but he picked up the fork and began to eat anyway. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he habitually asked for a salad instead of trying the new grilled chicken recently added to the menu. His eyes slowly scanned the empty classroom while he mentally checked off everything he was supposed to set out for the next experiment. It was going to be another long three hours of his life wasted away educating people who didn't wish to be educated. Stabbing his fork into his salad a few times, Naraku cursed under his breath before finally eating whatever stuck to the utensil.
"Oh, you already set stuff up? Neat."
Her voice erased everything in his mind. He almost jumped up, almost smiled, but he caught himself and recited, "Stupid," repeatedly in his mind until the urges went away. Instead, he sighed. "I didn't know you were coming back today. Otherwise, I would have left it for you."
"I wasn't sure I'd make it." Jade replied, fumbling around with the buttons of her lab coat until she gave up and left it open. Exhaling exasperatingly, Jade stared at the floor.
"A message ahead of time would suffice."
"You don't answer me, so why waste my time?" Jade asked with a shrug, still staring at the floor.
"I read them." Naraku admitted. He stood up and walked around the desk to get a better look at her. Her hair was shorter; the ends resting just at her shoulders instead of her chest. The bruising around her neck still looked awful. Jade stared back at him, pouting.
"Thaaaaanks. That makes me feel all better."
"I wasn't trying to make you feel better." he said, tensing up and holding his breath when Jade raised her fists and grit her teeth. Her enraged screams started echoing in his head, but she relaxed her body and Naraku relaxed with her and the memories of her screams dissolved away. The throbbing pressure in his chest, however, remained.
"I know you don't really care, but if there is even a molecule in your body that likes me, even just a little bit, please don't do this to me. I can't take it. Seriously, I might actually die." Jade looked up at him, her expression showing a mixture of her pain, frustration, and desperation, with a glimmer of hope shining in her eyes. Naraku stared back unblinkingly.
'Should...I...say something?' Naraku was completely lost in the empty abyss of his mind. What was he supposed to do? Say? Was feeling this way normal? It definitely didn't feel normal. His sarcasm switch had been flipped off and he couldn't find a way to flip it back on. The word, "threaten," had lost all meaning to him and was just a jumble of letters now. Those were his default modes! What else could he do?
"O-Okay," Jade said softly, her right hand pressed against her chest. When Naraku saw the tears streaming down her face, he felt like his entire brain had set itself ablaze. Jade was now half-way bent over and her breathing was sharp and erratic.
'Is she...Is she going to hit me? Is she going to go all through that again? Is it in her system forever?' Naraku looked around the room quickly, wishing an emergency Bruce was folded away in one of the cabinets to help calm her down. All the chemicals and scientific instruments of the department were at his disposal and they were absolutely useless! He was useless!
"I don't...understand! Why do you hate me?" Jade sobbed. Naraku felt like he was punched in the gut. The memory of Jade from his dream surfaced; frightened, injured, crying, asking for his help, and he strangled her despite it all.
'If I just kill myself for her, she'll stop and I won't feel anything anymore.' Naraku realized his entire body was locked in place. He wanted to move, to run, but nothing worked. It was almost as if his body was forcing him to watch this all unfold again to remind him, to torture him.
"Why didn't you just let me jump if I'm so annoying?"
"I don't ha- you misunderstand me." Naraku finally said, his voice strained as he struggled to control it. "I don't hate you." Almost instantly, the painful tension in his body disappeared. The pain in his chest lessened and he could nearly hear himself think rationally again. Jade was now sitting on the floor, her face buried in her hands as she sniffled.
"Then why are you,"
"I'm an asshole. Me not caring about something doesn't mean I hate it." Naraku shot, but he grit his teeth when the discomfort in his chest began to burn again. "I don't know...how," he stopped. Then, he knelt down so he was at eye-level with her. Jade was still hiding her face, though.
'What the fuck do I do? What do I do? Why is this happening to me?' Naraku held his own head, trying to prevent it from exploding. Finally, he reached out and planted his hand on top of her head. Jade slowly looked at him from behind her hands, frowning suspiciously.
"Stop crying. I'll do whatever you requested if you stop crying."
"I'm crying because you looked at me like I was stupid for asking it of you," Jade grumbled in reply.
"Yes, yes, I am an awful person. Understood. I'll stop bothering you." Naraku agreed hurriedly.
"You will?"
"I'll try."
"You're doing it right now."
"I'll do it when you stop crying." Naraku insisted. He saw her tear up again and his eyes widened with terror as he flinched and pulled away from her. "Fine! Fine! I'll even buy you lunch for a week, whatever you want, and I won't pester you about what you eat."
"You promise?" Jade asked, finally lowering her hands from her face.
"I promise." he agreed, holding his hand out to her as he stood up. Jade stared at it hesitantly, but she overcame the feeling and grasped his hand, letting him help pull her back to her feet. Jade walked past him towards one of the sinks to wash her face off. Naraku exhaled shakily.
'What just happened?' he wanted to scream.
After Jade pulled herself together, she greeted students when they began to enter the room. For once, they were all on time. Naraku kept his back to the class. He decided to write the correct answers to the calculation questions from the previous assignment on the board. Jade insisted she would do it since it was her usual task, but Naraku ignored her and began to write anyway. The students were now asking her how she was, what happened, what was wrong with her, and various other intrusive questions.
'It isn't their business.' Naraku thought bitterly. He tried to tune them out, but it was too loud and constant at that point.
"WeedWolf! What happened? Will you still stream?"
"WeedWolf! Are you still planning on going to KI Regionals?"
"Why are there bruises around your neck?"
'I swear, if any of you make her cry, I will drop you in a vat of hydrofluoric acid - alive.' Naraku grit his teeth, but he decided to remain silent. Jade could handle herself.
"Your hair is shorter! It looks nice!"
"Were you the psycho running around the building last week?"
The tip of the blue dry-erase marker Naraku was writing with snapped off from the immense pressure he pressed onto it. The marker struck the board sharply, harshly, and it silenced the room. Naraku mentally talked himself out of setting fire to the room before he stepped back and turned around. His eyes scanned the room steadily. Every student was staring at him now; some with wide-eyes, some with confusion, but all were dead-quiet. Naraku finally looked at Jade, who looked like she had seen a ghost. She was staring at the floor with tears welling up in her eyes. Naraku felt the panic beginning to rise in his chest once more.
"Have you all lost your minds?" Naraku asked venomously as he tossed the damaged marker to his right into a metal trashcan, creating yet another loud, sharp noise. "What makes you people think that any of the answers to those questions are your business, especially during class time?" Naraku glanced around again. Now, many faces showed regret and embarrassment. "Last week's lab report is due right now."
"I'll come around and collect them." Jade said, drying her tears with her lab coat sleeve.
"No. Designate one person at your table to pass your papers to and that person can bring them up here and place them on the desk." Naraku insisted, turning back to the board and grabbing another marker from the holder at the base of the board. He heard Jade begin to protest, but the students were already following his command.
'Absolutely ridiculous.' Naraku shook his head slightly.
He finished writing the calculation answers on the board, turned and crossed his arms. Every student was sitting straight up and staring at him. He had to hold back a smirk. That was how he wished they would be every day; obedient, silent, and fearful.
"I noticed last week that many of you don't know the order of operations, which makes me wonder; are you lazy or are you assuming that because this is chemistry, mathematical rules do not apply here?" Naraku began, now tapping the capped marker against his arm repeatedly.
"You know what, dude? You're an asshole!" one of the young men from the dude's table said aloud. Naraku recognized him as the one who cried upon figuring out who Jade was on the first day.
"I am well aware of that. If I'm not mistaken, you're one of the imbeciles who doesn't know that you solve what's on the inside of the parenthesis first." Naraku retorted. He glanced down when he saw Jade's arm stick in front of him.
"Let's just take a deep breath. You're grumpy from school and he's grumpy from grading papers by himself." Jade insisted with a nervous smile.
"No, no, I'm an asshole. He isn't wrong this time." Naraku chuckled, sticking his arm in front of her and stepping forward. "But I'm a smart asshole. I have no idea how you've made it this far in your schooling career not knowing basic algebra. I suppose that's impressive."
"Fuck you!"
"Heyyyy, let's not do this right now." Jade said aloud, pressing a hand to her chest. Naraku stared at her for a moment, noticing the sweat beading on her face.
"You should thank her. I was about to eviscerate you." Naraku warned, pointing at the frustrated student, who looked away and shook his head vehemently. "Class, start your experiment and read carefully, because I'm not feeling particularly merciful today. If you screw up, you must start over. If you run out of time, you're out of luck. You will not be allowed to borrow another group's data." Naraku announced as he slowly approached the discarded marker on the floor. He placed it back in the holder on the board and walked around to the chair behind the desk. Naraku leaned back and placed his feet on the desk, crossing his legs gracefully.
'Heh, that's more like it.' he thought when he heard the clinking of glass and quiet murmuring of what to do first. His eyes snapped open when he heard someone softly call Jade's name. He turned his head and watched her walk over to the table where the student Jade referred as, "Rainbow Girl," sat. It was the other girl of the group who had requested Jade's assistance, though. She began to speak, but Jade leaned in on the table, blocking his view.
'Was that on purpose?' he wondered. But, then again, Jade still seemed physically tired and had been using various surfaces to rest against since she arrived. It could have gone either way. Or both ways. Naraku rested his elbow on the other arm of the L-shaped desk and rested his face against his hand, watching as Jade pointed at the various tools in front of them, seemingly explaining their purpose. Several times she had to stop talking so she could take a breath or wipe a bead of sweat from her brow and each time, Naraku grit his teeth and closed his eyes.
'Why is she here if she's still in pain?' he frowned. Every time he saw her now, his chest would feel like it was imploding on itself. It was annoying, it was painful - not in the way that he enjoyed - and he was running out of patience. Naraku blinked and tried to physically rub the displeased expression from his face when he saw Jade walking back to him.
"Do I look weird or something? Why are you staring at me so much?" Jade asked him in a hushed voice. "Everyone already thinks you're a dick and a psychopath, so try not to add creep to the list."
"I wasn't staring at you." he replied, his hand still lightly smashing his face.
"Uh-huh."
"I spaced out."
"Whatever you ever say." Jade relented, planting her hands on the surface of the desk and leaning back into them slightly.
"Go sit down. If you drop from a heart attack, I'm not calling for help." Naraku ordered dryly.
"I'm pretty sure someone else would."
"Now." Naraku insisted, sharpening his tone. Jade rolled her eyes, but she walked over to her favorite spin-stool and sat on it quietly. She impatiently tapped an annoyed rhythm on her thighs for a few moments, possibly mimicking her heart beats, and then she yawned deeply and slowly before reaching up to wipe away the tears of fatigue. When she sighed again, her head snapped in his direction and her gaze locked on his. Her face said it all; stop staring at me. Naraku's eyebrows rose.
"What?" he asked accusingly.
"You," Jade paused to take a breath. "You exhaust me."
Jade sat more during the class after Naraku forced her to. She would still help, but she would borrow a seat from a student once she reached the table. The class must have been especially careful, because no one screwed up their experiment once. Naraku began gathering the chemicals as most groups were finishing up with cleaning before leaving. Jade sat at the dudes' table, in the usual spot of the angry idiot, and was explaining something to them before they left the room. Naraku placed all of the chemicals on a cart and turned when Jade walked up to him.
"I have to go." she said. "I'm not...the curfew."
"Go on." Naraku told her, avoiding eye contact as he tightened the caps of the bottles he had collected. She lingered a moment longer, as if she wished to say something, but she must have decided against it because she turned and walked out of the room. Naraku watched her, noticing the limp, the awkward way her torso tried to compensate, and his hands around her bruised throat.
"No," he winced, trying to push the image from his mind. "Jade, wait," Naraku called as he walked to the hallway.
"I can't! I'll get in trouble!" Jade replied urgently. Naraku bounded towards her.
"I'm sorry." Naraku couldn't hold it back. Something in the back of his mind shoved it out before he could approve it.
"F-For what?" she asked, looking at him as if he grew a second head. Naraku paused and observed her for a moment. He drugged her with a substance he knew little about. He almost killed her. He stole blood directly from her vein.
"Your shoulder. I probably tore the muscle, the rotator cuff," Naraku said quickly.
"The cuff is fine." Jade replied softly, now staring at the floor. Her hands began wringing each other. "Plus, this is better than being splattered across the parking lot."
"Is it?"
"No, actually," Jade laughed, but her eyes were shining with more tears. "I hate this."
"You came back too early."
"I can't afford to miss anymore. I'll never catch up if I do." Jade glanced at her phone, turning to walk away. "I have to go. Thanks for the apology. I'm not mad at you, though."
'You should be. You should absolutely despise me.' Naraku turned around to return the borrowed chemicals to the department's storage room. He began pushing the cart out of the room, arguing with himself about why he couldn't admit what he truly did to her. The law never stopped him before and, usually, he felt so proud and so amused about what he did that he had to openly admit it, just to get a final rise out of the person. It made him feel invincible. But Jade wouldn't react to him.
'She would never speak to me again.' His legs stopped moving and his hand pressed against his chest when the sensation of a sharp, searing knife pierced his heart.
