Trust

AN - I am sorry for how long this took. I will try to update more frequently. Thanks for sticking with me.

Sesshomaru backed away, but Jade was already colliding into him. Her screams rattled him more than her punches and when she began slamming his head into the floor, he jolted up right, hearing himself panting as he clutched his chest with one hand and gently gripped the back of his neck with the other. The sharp pains of the bite often made him wonder if the infection had somehow survived the flood of antibiotics the hospital flushed through his body. His fever had long broken, the blackness of the infection had faded into a bruise, and he was looking better, but something inside him was setting off red flags in his mind. Something was wrong, but he couldn't quite figure out what it was.

When he fell back asleep, her screams began to echo through his mind and eventually, it felt like she pinned him down again, cursing him for hitting her with a beaker, for ruining the slides she made, and ruining the samples she extracted. They were all unintentional - towards her, at least. Didn't she realize that?

Sesshomaru woke again. He had lost count of how many times he had fallen asleep only to wake from that nightmare that night.

'She had to have known I didn't mean to hurt her.' he thought, recognizing the pain in his chest as guilt. Sesshomaru was now standing at the sink in his kitchen, taking a long, needed drink of water to alleviate his dry throat.

Naraku was there when she snapped, too. Surely, Naraku had done worse to her, and yet, Jade turned and attacked Sesshomaru instead. Naraku was just as guilty as he was, if not more, but she barely noticed the other man. The only time she acknowledged him was after he pulled her off Sesshomaru's chest.

'Of course she didn't attack him; she is loyal to him.' he heard his own voice say bitterly. 'I simply amuse her when he isn't around.'

"No. That isn't true." he whispered out loud. Where did that come from? Was he truly that upset with Jade? He hadn't thought about her like that before. She was loyal, but didn't act it out vindictively towards others.

While eating a slice of toast, he flipped through one of the countless articles Bruce had dumped on him for his research. It wasn't as if he was looking for something in particular; he wasn't even focusing on the words. His hand was doing it out of habit, it seemed. A knock on his front door pulled him from his daze. When he looked out the window, no one was there. Sesshomaru frowned and opened the door, wondering what happened. No one had been there, that much he was certain of. He would have heard their footsteps, especially if they were racing off his porch to hide from him. The screen door also never made a sound.

'I know I heard it.' Sesshomaru closed his door and returned to his paper, but found himself still unable to focus on it. 'Perhaps I need to get out and do something else for a while.'

His phone vibrated, so he checked it. It was an email from Bruce and it actually made Sesshomaru cringe. Bruce was asking Naraku, Jade, and him to show up for a meeting to discuss the upcoming semester and the fate of the lab now that a rumor had sprouted from what Sesshomaru considered the truth; Naraku's project was making everyone around it ill. First Jade, then Naraku, and now his impossible accident via ice and cat. Bruce kept a healthy distance from Naraku, but it would catch him eventually. Naraku himself was a disease from which there was no escape once contact was made and his project was no different.

'I am willing to meet anywhere other than the lab.' Sesshomaru responded.

'Are you feeling well enough?' Bruce asked instantaneously.

'Why did you include me in this conversation if you weren't certain of my condition? I am fine; I just prefer we don't meet at Ground Zero. I know my chances of not being around Patient Zero are low enough.'

'That was incredibly cruel of you to refer to Jade in such a manner.' Naraku interjected.

Sesshomaru's mouth dropped open and he choked back a gasp, but not out of anger. He was absolutely shocked that Naraku would joke about Jade like that! He was a spiteful creature and would joke about someone's grandmother dying of cancer, but never did he think he would witness Naraku being so openly cold towards Jade. He liked her!

'That was uncalled for from both of you. I don't know if you realize how serious this situation is.' Bruce typed after a few minutes of what Sesshomaru assumed was stunned silence.

'Don't worry about me showing up. I'm dropping this semester.' Jade's statement almost gave Sesshomaru whiplash, but as soon as that shock came, it was overcome with relief. That was probably the best decision she had made since he met her. She should have dropped when she woke from her coma.

'Jade, are you sure? Can you call me when you have a moment?' Bruce insisted.

"Don't you dare talk her out of it." Sesshomaru grumbled under his breath.

'You will be sorely missed, Jade.' Naraku replied. It made Sesshomaru's stomach churn. What was happening? Did they have a falling out?

'Will you fuck right off?' Bruce shot back. Sesshomaru took a moment to steady his breathing. This situation was agitating him more than he cared to admit.

'This meeting will go nowhere with Naraku involved and I would prefer not to be exposed to him more than necessary. Make your decisions and email them to me, Bruce.'

'Fine. Go clean out your stuff from the lab. It's being quarantined. I'm technically supposed to not allow you guys to go in, but you'll ignore me anyway. Just be quick and discreet about it.'

Sesshomaru decided that would be his late-morning chore.

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After waiting for some of the people to clear out from the building, Sesshomaru moved from his car to the lab. He made sure no one else saw him before he slipped inside and closed the door behind him. His hand felt the wall for the light switch, flipping it.

On the main table sat a cage with white bars and a green base. Attached to the base of the cage was a piece of paper with Jade's name on it. Sesshomaru frowned, slowly approaching the cage. The paper with Jade's name was folded and on the inside, a brief note was written.

'Take care of him.'

"What...is this?" Sesshomaru whispered under his breath. He reached into the cage and lifted the cardboard box. Staring back at him was a gray guinea pig. Sesshomaru sent a picture of the cage to Jade and waited tensely for her response. It came a minute later in the form of a phone call. He slid his thumb across the screen to answer.

"Yes," he said.

"The guinea pig!" Jade spat out urgently. "Is he okay?"

"He is alive and alert."

"Oh, good," she exhaled loudly.

"What is this about?"

"He's Naraku's guinea pig."

"Naraku's...guinea pig." Sesshomaru repeated. He was glad no one else was in the lab because he was certain the look on his face was ridiculous. The absolute absurdity and irony of Naraku owning a guinea pig was too much for him. Then, the hair on the back of his neck stood up. Why would Naraku do this?

"Y-Yeah." Jade cleared her throat. "Can you keep the little guy safe? I should be there late tomorrow to pick him up."

"Jade, don't come back." Sesshomaru blurted out, deciding to listen to his instincts.

"What? Why?"

"I don't have a good feeling about any of this. The rodent is bait."

"Bait? No, look, I know you hate Naraku, and I get why, but please believe me when I say he wouldn't do that to the pig. He has a pretty strong attachment to him."

"If that is true, then why is he here alone and not home with Naraku?"

"Naraku is going through some stuff, I think, and he's already asked me to take care of the pig if anything happened."

"Then why didn't he text or call you and tell you he needed you to take it? Why would he leave it here knowing that you might not come back? Did you not read his comments aimed at you in the group emails? He doesn't care about you and if he doesn't care about you, he damn sure doesn't care about a rodent!"

"I saw his comments. If that's how he's going to be, so be it. I try not to question his actions anymore."

"You are defending him mindlessly!" Sesshomaru snapped, his voice uncontrollably gaining an edge to it. The call went silent; he checked to make sure she hadn't hung up on him. The timer was still going, so the call was still connected.

"I'm sorry." she finally said, her voice soft. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"I know you are fully capable of handling yourself, but you cannot handle him. No matter how cooperative and understanding you are, he will turn on you. He already has. Believe me when I tell you that this is bait."

"I can't just abandon the guinea pig."

"You can."

"I won't. I'm coming to get him." Jade replied stubbornly. "Please, look after him for me."

Sesshomaru's exhale was loud, heavy, and had he not known better, he would have thought his soul exited his body just then. "Fine. You can pick him up from my house. The lab is technically off limits now."

"Thank you. I'll see you soon."

"Drive safely. There isn't a time limit."

The call ended. Sesshomaru grit his teeth and threw his phone into the couch violently. He hadn't met someone who infuriated him so much with kindness besides his father. It was uncanny how much Jade was like him. Another thought crept up on him and his heart stopped for a moment.

'I fell for his bait, too. I should not have sent her the picture.' Sesshomaru grimaced and kicked over a stool, wishing he knew where Naraku lived so that he could visit him and choke him until he stopped twitching.

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Early the next afternoon, Sesshomaru opened his door and found Jade staring back up at him, trembling. It was cold, but something about her expression told him her nerves were affecting her more. Wrapped in both of her arms was a thick, black binder.

"I need to talk to you." she said. It sounded like she was choking back tears. Sesshomaru stepped aside and invited her into his house.

"Do we need alcohol?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Maybe."

"Wine? Liquor?"

"What kind of liquor?"

"Whiskey." He turned to head to the kitchen.

"Yeah, that's good."

"Also," he began as he pointed at the cage sitting on his floor next to the couch. "There is your true friend."

Jade practically flew to the cage, kneeling down and scooping up the guinea pig with one hand and keeping the binder tucked under her other arm. The guinea pig began chattering excitedly, nuzzling Jade's neck.

"Oooh, little pig, I'm so sorry." she whispered, planting kisses on its nose and ear. "I'll take care of you. I'll get you a friend."

Sesshomaru decided to give them some space despite also thinking how ridiculous it was. Jade placed the pig back in its cage and sat at the table with the binder, waiting for her host. He strode to the table where Jade sat, placing a glass down in front of her and another in front of him. Right when he tightened his hand around the cap, Jade gasped.

"Wait, wait, wait!" she demanded, throwing up both hands. "Is that Yamazaki?"

"Yes." Sesshomaru turned the bottle to show her the label. "Do you not like it?"

"I do, but that shit's expensive."

"I am aware."

Jade shook her head, covering her mouth with one hand and placing the other on her stomach. "Don't...Don't waste it on me." Tears began streaming down her face. Sesshomaru placed the bottle on the table and moved toward her. He couldn't help but to feel anxious whenever Jade cried. He could almost hear her screams again.

"Waste it? I offered it."

"No, you don't understand!" she cried, moving her hand off her mouth. "You're going to hate me!"

"I doubt that." he responded calmly, carefully placing his hand on her shoulder. "It's a long drive from New Mexico. Are you hungry?"

"Sesshomaru, please,"

"What is it, then? What do you think you've done that will make me hate you?"

"Naraku told me what he did to you." Jade blurted quickly. Sesshomaru felt his hand drop from her shoulder to his side. "I've been wanting to tell you,"

Sesshomaru felt his anger stir within him. "Why haven't you?"

"I wanted to give him a chance to tell you himself. I haven't heard from him in three weeks, so it hit me on my way here that he probably didn't tell you."

Instantaneously, his anger subsided. Sesshomaru hadn't met anyone with such a godly amount of sympathy before in his life. Even his father had boundaries. She so badly wanted to believe that Naraku cared about her as much as she cared about him. As frustrating as it was, he couldn't find it within himself to blame her. The only thing he could do was pinch the bridge of his nose and close his eyes, waiting for the overwhelming feelings of confusion and frustration to subside.

"I'm sorry. I can leave."

"Stay. I don't hate you, Jade." Sesshomaru finally said after a moment of silence.

"Really?"

"Really." he insisted, turning to grab the bottle of whiskey. "Do you still want a drink?"

She gave him an exhausted smile, wiping away her tears. "Yeah. Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet. I haven't even shown you my dick." He sighed with relief when he heard her laugh.

As Sesshomaru skimmed through Naraku's notes, Jade devoured the sandwich he had made her in the meantime. Occasionally, he would stop and curse under his breath when he read something outrageously disgusting, and Jade would apologize. Despite knowing Naraku had something to do with Jade's illness, reading exactly what he did to her infuriated Sesshomaru on a deeper level. Yet, here she was, sitting at his table, knowing everything Naraku had done, and she still believed he was worth a second chance. No, a millionth chance. Sesshomaru never believed Stockholm Syndrome was an actual condition, but Jade's relationship with Naraku was the textbook definition if he had ever seen it. However, there was a more likely explanation.

"Do you love him?" Sesshomaru asked suddenly, looking from the notes to Jade and hoping to catch her off guard. She covered her mouth with her hand, preventing herself from spraying food all over him.

Jade thumped her chest with her fist a couple of times and coughed. "No!"

"I don't believe you."

"Okay?" Jade responded, her expression clearly saying, "What the fuck?"

"Take a few moments to think about why I asked you that and I will continue reading."

"The most we've done is hug and that happened once." Jade began, holding up her index finger. "No declarations of love, no kissing, no sex,"

"Love doesn't have to be physical."

"Oh my god. I had no idea you were the Love Guru. Learn me your ways." she snipped sarcastically while staring at him with annoyance.

"I would know; I made my ex orgasm with words alone."

"I've never seen a man ride his own dick before. She was probably playing with herself, dude." Jade wiggled her fingers at him.

"That would have been impossible; her hands were tied."

Jade's mouth opened, ready to fire back, but her brain processed his words and she paused, screwing up her face in mild disbelief at the image he described to her. "Okaaaay, but Naraku and I didn't do anything like that, so your point-"

"My point is that you do not need to be physical, or even sexual, to love someone." Sesshomaru interjected sternly. "It's fine if you do; I'm not judging you harshly."

"Harshly." Jade repeated dryly, arching an eyebrow. "You've got me pegged wrong- wait, that came out wrong. Shut up!"

Sesshomaru had begun chuckling lightly at her. Even if she truly didn't love Naraku, watching her squirm at the accusation was amusing. "Jade-"

"What about you?" she interrupted, pointing at him fiercely. "You sure do care a lot about me and my loooooove life considering how we aren't that close."

"You can blame that on yourself." he retorted, taking a sip of whiskey.

"I'm not to blame for your erections."

"You have a charm about you where every person who interacts with you feels like they've known you all their lives. Personally, I find you to be funny, intelligent, and kind to a fault. Why you spend your time around those three thirsty heathens and Naraku is beyond me, but I see why they gravitate toward you."

"Hahahaha! You found my YouTube channel, didn't you?"

"I did. The one with the ponytail - Koga - has an unnecessary amount of jealousy where you're concerned. Did you reject him?"

Jade pointed at herself incredulously. "Me? Koga with me? Nah, not in a million years. He has standards and I don't meet them, and honestly, he's not my type."

Tilting his head, Sesshomaru found himself strangely curious about her romantic life at that moment. Was it because he actually cared or did he need a break from Naraku's fucked-up research? Both, perhaps. The thought of Jade dating was almost a joke. Being in love - albeit silently - with Naraku? He could see it. Being affectionate with anyone? He was drawing blanks.

"What is your type?"

"Uh," she paused, crossing her arms. "Well, I guess a sense of humor is important, and they need to be reliable, smart - the usual stuff people look for."

"You flatter me."

"Shut your fucking whore-mouth, Sesshomaru. Fuck." she snapped playfully and with exasperation.

"You aren't looking, though?"

"Nah." Jade picked her sandwich up, staring at it. "Last relationship wasn't great, so I decided to be single for a while and I'm finding that I like it better."

"I can relate."

"Yeah?"

"Mhm. My last relationship ended mutually for a few different reasons, but for me, the main reason was freedom. She wanted a commitment, eventually marriage and children, and I did not."

"Ah, that makes sense." Jade pursed her lips and frowned. "So, you don't want to be married or have kids ever?"

"It isn't something I care to pursue. I don't mind the idea of marriage as much as I mind the idea of having children, though."

"Same. I don't like weddings and shit. If I ever get married, it'll be done as a little party in my backyard or something."

Sesshomaru refrained from making a face. "I cannot see you being with anyone."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." he insisted, looking back down at the binder. "It isn't you."

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Jade regained consciousness and her brain tried to organize complete thoughts. It had been the first time she had fallen completely asleep without any dreams or nightmares tormenting her. However, she had yet to sleep without the aid of alcohol. Even without opening her eyes, she could tell it was dark. The only light was from the TV. Eventually, she peeled her eyes open and looked around the room. She found Sesshomaru sitting at the other end of the couch with his torso curled over the arm. His curtain of long, white hair hung was draped over the arm, too. Slowly, she sat up, unsteadily reaching over to wake him from his uncomfortable position.

"Mm?" Sesshomaru's body moved, but then collapsed back into the same pose she found him in. Jade found her footing, this time grasping his arm.

"Hey, that's can't be comfy." Jade said, stifling a yawn with her shoulder. She tugged on the sleeve of his shirt.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"You need to go to bed. Come on." she replied. Sesshomaru gave a groan of disapproval, but he began to push himself upright. He collapsed against the back of the couch, blowing strands of hair from his face. A grin appeared on his face.

"Are you going to take me to bed, Jade?"

'Oh god, he's trashed.' Jade closed her eyes for a moment. She thought she drank more than he did, but she also passed out before he did. When she opened her eyes, her thought was confirmed when she saw the nearly-empty bottle of whiskey on the end table next to him. He definitely continued his fun.

"Can you stand?"

"I can try."

It took a couple of tries, but Sesshomaru was on his feet, albeit, a tad unstable. Jade helped keep him steady, slowly ushering him down the hallway to his bedroom. They reached his room with no collapsing, which was a relief. She was also thankful that his bed sat low to the floor. Tall beds drove her nuts when she was sober, let alone while drunk and helping an even drunker man who outweighed her.

"Stay." Sesshomaru said as he sat on the edge of his bed, keeping a light grasp on Jade's arm.

"Uh, haha, you're very drunk."

"I didn't mean it like that. I meant stay here for the night. I don't want you driving like this."

"Oh, okay. Thanks."

Sesshomaru pulled off his shirt before reclining onto his bed. "Unless, you are interested?"

"Shut up." Jade said with a giggle. She froze when she felt his hand grab hers gently.

"I am sorry, Jade."

"You know I like your jokes."

"No, not that." he said. "I am sorry for throwing that beaker at you, for ruining your slides and samples,"

The apology stalled Jade's brain. She didn't think she would ever hear an apology from Sesshomaru.

"I'm not saying this because I'm drunk, because I'm not drunk."

"Uh-huh." Jade decided not to argue with him. She just smiled, knowing it was too dark for him to see how much she did not believe his, "I'm not drunk," claim.

"I, uh, I keep having these dreams about you,"

"Dreams?" Her body tensed up and her blood turned cold.

"Mhm. Not sexual dreams. I keep dreaming about you punching me, mostly."

'Of course you do.' she thought wryly. She preferred him to have wet dreams over her as opposed to dreaming about the time she nearly beat him to death.

"Sometimes, they're dreams about you being angry with me still. You aren't still angry with me, are you?"

"No. I was sick, remember? I promise I'm not mad. I just hope you're not upset with me for what I did."

"I'm not." he said softly, finally releasing her hand. "When you were sick, did you have dreams that felt real?"

"I still do."

"Something doesn't feel right."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know. It just doesn't feel right. I don't feel right."

"Well, sleep off the alcohol and you might feel a tad better."

"Fine. You can sleep in my office. There is a spare bed."

"Couch is good enough for me." Jade replied, leaving his room. She didn't even deserve to sleep in the dirt in his yard during winter while it was raining as far as she was concerned. She checked on the guinea pig, giving him a few pats, and then curled back up on the couch after turning off the TV. Then, she thought about Sesshomaru's apology, and how much she appreciated it. She didn't think she ever needed to hear it - she didn't expect to ever hear it - but it did make her feel better. She closed her eyes holding onto that thought as she drifted off.