Feelings

"Oh god… oh god, please be ok." I muttered as Madame Pomefry worked on Draco behind the closed doors of the hospital wings. Scorpius was crying loudly on my hip and I was trying to calm him whilst equally trying to stop any tears rolling down my own cheeks. There was a thick lump in my throat that made it hard to breathe. My mind was racing, had he been off his game because of me? I shouldn't have told him I hoped he lost. I shouldn't have been quite so mad, he'd only snapped because he'd clearly been struggling with something lately and didn't know how to share it. Realistically I would've done the same. I guess I'd just been mad because I wanted him to share things with me. I wanted him to open up, I wanted him to prove that he was a guy that was worth the effort, a good guy that bad things had happened to. Maybe I had wanted too much too soon, I knew full well that he'd changed. I knew full well that he'd changed that he wasn't the same boy I'd grown up with just from the fact we'd become so close but at the same time I should've known it would take time for him to properly open up.

"Hermione! Snap out of it." I blinked and glanced across at Harry and Ginny who had clearly been trying to get my attention as I paced back and forth trying to get little Scorpius to calm down. He was still crying and it was clear he knew something was up.

"Look I can see you're worried, want us to take Scorpius for a while? We'll get him changed and fed and it'll help calm him down to be away from this." Harry said reaching his hands over. I felt a little apprehensive handing him over. Obviously Harry would never hurt him or anything but Scorpius was so fussy around new people and what if Draco had an issue with it. Draco's not here right now. The words imprinted themselves on my mind and I knew I was being over protective. Scorpius wasn't even my child and Malfoy probably wouldn't want him worrying.

"Uh Thanks Harry, I just need to hear some news is all." I muttered still feeling a little distracted. Ginny gave me a quick hug before her and Harry carried Scorpius away. He seemed to settle a bit in Harry's arms which told me I'd made the right decision after all.

I slowly slid down the wall and wrapped my arms around my knees. I just wanted to make sure he was ok, I felt like it was my fault. I couldn't deny that lately I'd felt a bit of a connection to him but that was because I'd finally seen a different side of him. My mind was exhausted from running in circles and part of me wished I could talk to someone about everything going on.

"I must admit I never thought I'd see the day you were worrying about him Granger." I offered the softest of smiles to Zabini as he slid down next to me. Of course he'd be here, he and Malfoy were best friends. In many ways it was strange to think of Malfoy having best friends. I could never imagine him confiding in anyone the way Harry, Ron and I used to confide in one another. True Ron's stubbornness was getting in the way lately but still, Malfoy always seemed too reserved to have friends like that.

"Yeh, well we had a fight earlier and I felt guilty." I muttered looking back down at my hands which were still shaking.

"Are you sure that's all you felt Granger?" Zabini added, his voice level. He reminded me of Malfoy in many ways, always weirdly calm and collected. I looked across at him and met his penetrating eyes that seemed to bore into my soul.

"Of course, why would I feel anything else?" I replied a little too quickly causing Zabini to smirk an annoying proud smirk.

"Well, I've just noticed how close you two have become is all." He replied ominously as he pulled his eyes away from me. Somehow not having his eyes on me made me feel less obliged to come up with satisfactory answers.

"Well I've been helping with Scorpius, and he's him and I'm me, so feelings don't matter." I blurted after a few moments somehow managing to sound clear and confused at the same time. Again Zabini just smirked and sat silently for a few moments. His silence was irritating, it made me feel as though I needed to add more to what I'd already explained but I stopped myself from rambling on and waited for him to talk again.

"It wouldn't be a bad thing if you saw him differently to how you did before. He's changed a lot, he's been through a lot, things that other people our age can only imagine." I let Zabini's words roll over me carefully. So even he saw how different Malfoy was, maybe that was what had made the two of them so close? It was clear that Malfoy had confided a lot in Zabini as I could see a darkness fade across his eyes and a tiny hint of pain? Or was it pity?

"I know about Scorpius' mother." I spoke into the air between us, it was the only thing I could think of to say to explain how I knew what Zabini had meant. Zabini's brow furrowed and he studied me for a few seconds as though fighting with himself. Maybe he was just surprised that Malfoy had told me something so personal.

"You do?" He added carefully after a few moments. I knew he was inviting me to add more to my statement and clearly he wanted to see exactly what Malfoy had told me before he said anything he wasn't supposed to. I imagine Malfoy had told me everything, it wasn't really a tale that seemed incomplete. Devastating but not incomplete.

"The muggle girl, it's terrible what they did to her, terrible that they took her away from him and Scorpius like that. So brave of him to keep going really, something like that would tear some people apart completely." I explained watching as recognition spread across Zabini's face and he seemed content with my answer.

"He doesn't like to admit it but he's a good person, memories of everything that happened hurt him everyday. You're the first person to get a real smile out of him since it all happened." Zabini added slowly. I knew he wanted me to explain how I felt but the truth was I couldn't explain to him something which I couldn't figure out for myself.

"He certainly challenges me more than anyone else." I said honestly, it was true after all one of the things I enjoyed was how he matched me intellectually. I watched as Zabini smirked once more but was pulled away from studying his reaction by the sound of the hospital wings doors opening. Both of us scrambled to our feet facing Madame Pomefry who looked slightly frazzled.

"Mr Malfoy should be fine. He's sleeping now but you may go in." She spoke bluntly as we both hurried in and pulled a chair to either side of the bed. He looked paler that normal and there was a deep bruise forming on his head but the rest of his injuries were covered by the bright white sheets that covered his still form. He looked so vulnerable like this, and for once I remembered how young he was. How much he'd been through all at the age of 18. He deserved more than the life he'd been given. Looking up I saw Zabini's eyes watching me closely as I looked over Malfoy's peaceful form.

"I won't tell him." He muttered softly smirking as his knowing eyes stared straight at me.

*****End****

Hi all! Very short filler chapter I didn't want to keep you all hanging any longer so thought I would get this chapter out there more coming soon! Love you all! xoxo