Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece.

"One Piece." – Speaking

'One Piece.' – Thinking

One Piece. – Flashbacks

One Piece. – Devil Fruits and Techniques

Deadly Drinking Pirate

What Happened To The Clown Of All Pirates?

Previously on Deadly Drunken Pirate,

And when Kuro was taken in the ship, bound for good measure and will be out for a while, the Black Cat Pirates were banished from the island for good. Usopp asked of the children trio, Kaya and Luffy's crew to keep this a secret. He said that even though he had saved the village, no one will ever believe him and think all this is just another lie.

His 'Usopp Pirates' agreed and went home and acted like they were just out playing in the dirt a lot early because they felt like it. But Kaya had other plans; she felt like even though she knew that Usopp wasn't lying, she still needed to look after the one boy she liked the most in the world and vice versa. She wanted not just to listen to stories but to be there when Usopp actually lived them out.

Merry, one of Kaya's actual butlers that was supposedly killed off when Kuro crushed Kaya's new glasses and unleashed his contained bloodlust, even gave them what they were looking for; a new but smaller ship. It was about half the size of the King's Gourd with a simple design but what really stood out was a forehead that was a goat's head. Merry said that he had constructed the ship and named it the 'Going Merry' after himself.

"Come on everyone! I have a few things to share with you since it was still be a while before we arrive in the Grand Line." Luffy shouted from the deck and everyone heard it from their rooms, getting adjusted to a new crew member and a second, smaller ship in tow. When everyone came around, Luffy started to walk in back and forth in a line before setting his sights on Alvida, technically his first crew member.

"Alvida, can you escape smoke? Can you shatter boulders? Can you use your powers to slide across water?" Luffy started to talk really weird and Alvida just silently shook her head and watched her captain turn to Zoro.

"Zoro, can you cut iron? Cut steel? Slice from a distance? Cut an entire ship in half?"

"Hell no!"

"Nami, can predict weather up to extent of hours rather than minutes? Can you dodge thunderbolts and bullets? Can you use lightning like a hammer?"

"Um…no?"

"Kaya, can you fix cuts and bruises in seconds? Heal broken bones and illnesses in minutes? Attach severed limbs on the fly and in the midst of battle?"

"Of course not Luffy-san."

"And you Usopp, can you hit a moving target miles away? Can you use your arms to send a projectile through barriers and shields? Can you tell what to use for what target while in battle?"

"Why are you asking all this!? It is impossible!" Usopp finally blew up but Luffy didn't lose his stance.

"No Usopp, we are going to be sailing in the World's Greatest Sea. Things like those are never impossible, they are essential instead." Luffy said with a glare that dared anyone to keep talking back.

"Then how are we going to learn how to do it all?" Kaya showed to be the more mature and calm about new developments.

"I am glad you were the one to ask Kaya because I need to offer something to you first." Luffy said before leaving the deck for something and it didn't take long for him to return with a chest. Opening it, everyone was in awe that it was another fruit.

"Is that an Akuma no Mi?" Alvida said, the one other than Luffy as the Devil Fruit users on the King's Gourd.

"Yes and among all of them, this fruit is one of the few that are the most sought out because of its power. But I need you to eat it Kaya." Luffy said and Kaya tenderly took it out and into her hands.

She raised her eyebrow about all this and followed Luffy's silent request to eat it. "Arrgh!" She immediately spat out, as if she was eating something poisonous and knew from the moment it touched all the taste buds on her tongue. "Now what Captain?" Kaya asked as she just about removed the awful fruit out of her mouth. What she didn't expect was Luffy taking out her Katana and slicing her arm off!

"LUFFY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?" Usopp nearly charged at Luffy, with the aim of striking back on mind but not before Luffy grabbed Kaya's severed arm and placing it back on. Kaya stumbled back only to discover that she could move her arm again and after a few more seconds, that cut all but disappeared.

"Sorry about that sudden surprise but it was necessary for you to eat the fruit and I need to show you why." Luffy said sheepishly at Kaya while helping her back on her feet. A glare from her and Nami had beat Usopp's outburst by a few miles and Luffy laughed nervously at it.

"You better start explaining Luffy-kun."

"Right." Luffy said almost like a kicked puppy as he took out a book from his robe. "Here, read page 23." When Nami opened the page, she read.

"The Zen'yu- Zen'yu no Mi or the Heal-Heal Fruit. At default, will allow the user to gain an accelerated healing factor in which all minors take seconds while severed limbs need some more time. It will training to reach its full potential however. Once the user does, he or she can heal from near death injuries and even fatal illnesses." That explained a lot and the crew looked to their captain who had been smiling the whole time.

"Touché Luffy." Usopp said looking a little down for worrying about nothing and doubting the actions of his captain.

"So…" Zoro said to break the silence. "When do we start out real training to gain the other skills Luffy?" That somehow got everyone ready to learn as well and instead, they just got Luffy to change his smile into a smirk which nearly intimated them.

"Almost done…" Luffy dragged on the deck with a piece of cloth that he had bought from kaya along with the Going Merry and the rest of the supplies from Syrup Town. "It is complete!" Now that got everyone's attention from their training on the deck of the King's Gourd. They all went down to see what was up. "Behold, our flag!"

Luffy's crew were in awe and satisfaction to see at least a decent flag design. In the style of the original Jolly Roger only the skull wore a straw hat like Luffy's and the crossbones were replaced with a katana and a saber. All in all, this flag reflected Luffy the best out of the crew but then again that is because he is the founder and captain of the crew.

"That is actually pretty good drawing skills there Captain." That comment came from none other than Kuro himself whom was taken by Luffy and brought aboard his ship after the Black Cat Pirates were defeated. After waking up bound in chains, Kuro was offered to be the strategist of the crew while learning how to adapt to any situation and the only way to do that is to take him through the Grand Line. Kuro was also offered to become an actual pirate rather than some kind of outlaw sailor who became tired of being pursued by the marines every single day.

"But that will never be as good as I can do!" Usopp puffed up his chest to make him seem very tough and very 'manly'. Luffy smirked,

"If you can then paint this on the spare flags and the sails. Unlike most pirates, I prefer that the symbol will be on the sails as well as the flags." Luffy said with the flag in question hiding his smirk while seeing the flames in Usopp's eyes as the sniper grabbed all the paint on the ship, took down the sails and got to work. "And meanwhile, you all should get back to your training because I need to tend to a few things. But remember, in an hour I will come out and oversee the training results and I will take my own turn at it." Luffy hid his smirk once again from behind the flag to see the pale faces of his remaining crew members.

Seeing them hurry back to some activity that involved one to wear a blindfold while their partner will take a wooden sword and attempt to hit them while the former to dodge. It was a harsh practice since everything hurts twofold if we can't see it coming to happen to us. But after a week since Syrup Village, results were good and everyone had noticed that they could feel the wooden sword coming with enough time to dodge.

And yet this day was more than for training but for a little walk down memory lane. Nami had one of the earliest memory of what she was learning, Haki. Haki or as Luffy explained, weaponized will or ambition. Luffy called it the user's spirit adding it in battle and Haki can alert to incoming danger or create an invisible suit of armor or both if trained together; and yet that is all the basics compared to what Luffy has been doing since that day in a settlement named Orange Town.

Flashback Begins!

Nami had just gotten her hands on yet another large sack of Berries and gold, easily five million. But it was just sinking her ship so she needed a much better ship to carry it all back to her destination, currently unknown to all but Nami herself. She had spotted a much bigger ship that was more like a patrol boat compared to the dingy she had to compromise with and on board were three pirate grunts.

But they weren't a problem, easily falling for one of her 101 Tricks To Get More By Stealing techniques. Nami faked to be sick and tired and in the need for help so that the grunts will sail close enough for her to get their ship. But there was a bonus. Nami had sensed a rogue thundercloud and set that her former ship will sail in the direction nonstop and the grunts never saw it coming.

Of course, Nami forgot all about that when she found out that the grunts belonged to Buggy the Clown Pirate and while that meant she will have to watch her back from every hour to every five minutes, it also meant that there was a treasure map. And there was on to be found and it was more than just a map, it was one to the Grand Line. Where the world's greatest dangers but also the greatest treasures are to be found.

Nami just loves treasure but she is not stupid enough to try the Grand Line all by herself and in a patrol boat so she put such thoughts aside and continued to look for treasure. That was when she found Orange Town which seemed to be deserted. So Nami hid her boat and tried to see if the houses contained any belongings that were left behind.

Instead, she was found by a trio of freaks that seemed to be from a freak circus that fired them because they were too freaky even for them. They saw that map and came under the conclusion that Nami actively stole it from their captain, Buggy. Nami realized that the map did belong to Buggy and somehow, he figured out that it was stolen already.

"Come back here!"

"Give that map back you thief!"

And so, the trio of freaks chased after Nami throughout Orange Town while the girl in question was trying to either outrun them or lose them. But as they were gaining on her, someone landed between Nami and her pursuers.

"Stupid bird." They all heard the gruff tone of a young man having a bad day but they were expecting the sounds of bones breaking and screaming in pain. Instead, Nami saw a boy just a year younger than her rise up to show that he was lean but very well built. It made her blush at the sight. Also that wild raven hair and outfit made him look like an very wild man indeed and that only made Nami blush more with the thoughts of the times that she can be with this 'wild hunk'. "Interrupting my nap only to decide over this town that I didn't taste good. How insulting."

That was then that Nami had finally thought of a plan. "Boss!" Nami tried to have an excited and straight face but she only embarrassed herself by calling this hunk in front of her eyes as Boss. Girls only call boys around their age boss when they want to be dominated by them and that includes the sexual but that wasn't what Nami had in mind right now. "You have come to save me! Thank you, I will leave those three jerks to you!"

The boy was confused but didn't seem to notice that the three freaks had decided to change targets between Nami and this boy that fell from the sky. "So you're that bitch's boss huh?" "Too bad for you, were asked of the great Pirate Buggy and thus we can kill you!" They then started to laugh as they raised their weapons on the boy without realizing that there was bloodlust in the air as soon as they started to talk.

But before they can even touch the boy, they heard a very sharp sound sort of like a *Clink*; the sound when a sword is placed back into its scabbard. But before they could respond to that, they blacked out and fell to the ground in a similar way to that of a boar shot down. "Jerks."

"Wow! You are strong and handsome, Handsome." The boy turned to see Nami who was sitting on a rooftop of one of the vacant houses. "I can really use someone like you. We will make a fortune."

"I don't even know your name." The boy said very bluntly and Nami may have felt like an arrow through her chest but she quickly regained her composure. She can't be angry because it was true.

"My name is Nami. Expert Thief that specializes in stealing from pirates. At your service." She said in hopes that will clear things up and it just made the young man frown.

"My name is Monkey D. Luffy and I don't take offers from thieves. I shouldn't even be standing around here. I need to find my ship and my crew. Stupid bird." The boy, now named Luffy, ignored Nami coming after him as he walked into a certain direction.

"Hey wait!" Nami ran after Luffy and finally made him stop when she ran directly on his path. "You don't mean ay of that, you did beat them up for insulting me. Right?" Luffy finally smiled and nodded,

"Of course."

"And it was cool, they didn't stand a chance!" Nami acted like an excited kid who saw a hero save the day right in front of her eyes. But all that turned to worriedness and curiosity almost immediately. "But how did you do it? You didn't even move from that spot!" Nami demanded to know only to follow Luffy's arm and she saw something like a grove in the pavement where Luffy originally stood.

"Sorry but I have to leave before you rob me." Luffy said and tried to get back on his way.

"I won't steal from my hero, only pirates!" Nami shouted and Luffy just turned his head to show off a victory smirk. "Are you saying that you are a pirate!?"

"No. I am saying that you are a thief. You said that yourself." Luffy said to break the ice and Nami just blushed a red that can rival a ripe tomato. "Still I need an actual Navigator to get to the Grand Line according to this map." Luffy said and Nami panicked when she couldn't feel the map she stole in any of her pockets.

"Hey give that back!" Nami ran to get that map back and missed once Luffy playfully raised his arm to keep the map out of Nami's reach. The fall only gave her a little scratch but also stunned her for a few seconds. Plenty of time for Luffy to admire what Nami had been hiding from him under her skirt. When she got back on her feet, she saw the look in Luffy's eyes and suddenly felt only to cover her behind and blush in embarrassment. "Please Luffy, I need that map to help my village." No matter how hard Nami tried, she just couldn't get angry from all this.

"I will give this back on only one condition." Luffy said, knowing that he had gotten Nami into a corner where she is desperate enough to do anything for that map. "You will show me where the harbor is and you will get the map back if you will be a good bad girl and steal all the gold from Buggy without getting caught." That was long but to the point and Nami nodded without hesitation; she seriously thought that Luffy was going to ask something a lot naughtier for her to do.

Later, Luffy was at the harbor with the map still in his hand while waiting for Zoro to find his way with his ship at least. Luffy did leave a compass and another map that showed all the nearby towns and nearby islands. Even someone like Zoro will know how to use a map and compass, hopefully.

Still, Luffy was not alone. He had Chouchou, the town dog, keeping him company. Chouchou is a simple small white dog that often has its tongue out and has short ears, thin white fur, and beady black eyes. And yet this dog was cowered in bruises and also had a crumpled box of dog food in his mouth.

Chouchou had owed Luffy so much when the young man had fought to avenge the destruction of the pet store that once belonged to his owner until he passed away to an illness. It was all done by a giant lion on its supposed trainer of all animals, Mohji. But even with his familiar named Richie, Mohji lost to Luffy from the start and it was a matter of time before he was punched right into the ground, out like a light.

That ruined box was the only thing that survived the store being burned down so Chouchou will keep it as his treasure. To maybe one day, use it to reopen the shop and protect by himself as well.

But just then, there was a momentous explosion from within the town. Luffy just sighed, "I should've known." He said with a frustrated tone and placed the map away in his jacket. "Keep an eye for a large ship in the shape of a large gourd Chouchou, then convince a scary man to follow you into town okay?" Luffy said to the dog who barked and nodded before looking back on the sea while Luffy himself then raced into Orange Town,

There he found the trouble. Buggy the Clown was on a rampage. Buggy is a slim, yet muscular blue-haired man with an appearance resembling that of a clown, as to mirror his epithet. Buggy's face is covered with makeup, just like a clown; he had crossbones going down his face forming an X. He also has green eyeliner and green lipstick, with a curvy line going down both sides of his face. In his pirate captain attire, he dons a striped white and red shirt with short sleeves, white gloves reminiscent of the ones worn by clowns, a sash around his waist like many other pirates, and a pair of loose pants reaching to his calves, just above a pair of striped socks and pointy shoes. He also has a scarf around his neck. Hanging from his shoulders there is an orange, fur-lined captain's coat. On his head he has an orange hat with his jolly roger on it, over a bandanna with the same pattern of his shirt.

And Buggy seemed to be angry enough to tear up all the houses with his huge cannon. "Where is that bitch!? She stole my treasure! Blow up this whole place until you find her!" Buggy shouted among the sounds of cannon firing and the sound of house exploding. Luffy just ignored all that and found Nami well out of fire range even though she was as quiet as a mouse.

"Don't think that you will getting my map for this mess Nami." Luffy said and scared her from her hiding place.

"L-luffy, i-I am sorry. I-I d-didn't-think they w-would've…" Nami was halted in her stuttering by Luffy's facial expression.

"Just go and find a hurt white dog and wait for a large ship to come with a man of green hair and three swords as well as a woman with a large club. Then tell them what happened." Luffy said and started to leave Nami but not without adding this, "I will make sure that Buggy will never try and steal your treasure while you are doing it okay?" He said with a grin that made Nami blush once again and her heart start racing.

Not trusting her own voice, Nami just nodded like a woodpecker and ran to the harbor. Meanwhile, Luffy walked right into the warzone that Buggy was, "Having fun Big Nose?" That caused everything to freeze in silence including the pirate captain in question.

"Who are you calling a Big Nose!? Fire the Buggy Ball!" Buggy shouted and ordered for Luffy's supposed demise by firing one of those oversized cannonballs that were acting like bombs once they hit their target hard enough. And yet Luffy's didn't die or get blown up. He just caught the 'Buggy Ball' like a baseball with his forearm acting like the spring of a pinball machine.

"You are exactly like what Shanks always told me Buggy." Luffy said and reeling in his arm. "Gum-Gum Slingshot!" And sent the 'Buggy Ball' back to Buggy! He and his pirate gang suddenly turned cowardly as their own cannonball-bomb was headed their way. They were then caught up in a gigantic explosion.

But Luffy still didn't move from that spot. Even when he somehow sensed that the town was crowding with various and many life signatures. There was even one of a familiar woman and one the size of an average sized dog. "I told them to stay put…" Luffy muttered but still didn't move his focus from the cloud of smoke. "You can come out Buggy, you can't fool me."

The townspeople who showed their faces around a corner as well as Nami and Chouchou looked in with confusion and shock. How can even Buggy the Clown survive something like that? They got their answer with a fit of laughter but they weren't going to like it. Out of the blue and smoke, were the bodies of two clown themed pirates, both unconscious and held in the air by a disembodied hand!

"How dare you embarrass me like this." Buggy growled, obviously using his own men as shields to protect himself from the explosion. The townspeople and Nami commented on that very negatively but both Luffy and Buggy ignored all that.

"Your hands, so you did eat an Akuma no Mi like Shanks said you did on his old ship." Luffy remarked that got Buggy to laugh out of controllably.

"That's right! I ate the Bara-Bara no Mi! I have become the bane of every Swordsman in the world! That is how great and powerful I am!" Buggy proclaimed but Luffy was not to be interested. "And it is how I am going to get all the treasure in the world as well as getting my revenge on that bitch who is good for nothing but stealing and back stabbing!" Buggy started to laugh but also to shiver. "Hey who cut off the heat!? I am freezing to death!"

True to that, ice and icicles started to form on every house and every wall around Luffy's position. What is more, Nami and Chouchou also felt it but they nearly forgot about the freezing temperatures when they saw every single townsfolk hiding among the alleyways collapse as if they suddenly perished.

"Don't say another word Buggy. I am sick of hearing your stupid voice. I am sick of you smearing your old captain's name by doing such disgraceful work in his home ocean! And I am sick of what you are calling Nami!" Luffy exploded in an encrypted tone until he took out his saber and, to the shock of Nami and Chouchou, stabbed Buggy through the left middle torso like a pitchfork in a bale of hay. "You are not great Buggy, you are not powerful and you are not going to hurt this town. Destroy their hard work! Ruin their home! And you are not going to kill anyone else on this island! BUGGY!" Luffy screamed and delivered a swift and mean slice across Buggy's entire chest, spilling spoiled blood for all those to see.

Meanwhile, Buggy was in great pain and confusion. How is someone like him, who ate the Bara-Bara no Mi, can be cut!? But what had somehow caused Buggy to forget about the pain was him seeing Luffy change. Change into a demon, to a ghost, a madman, to a devilish monkey, to the Devil himself. How is that Buggy, with a stab wound and a large hack mark will hallucinate?

"Now go Buggy! Go and never come back!" Luffy placed his blades away and stretched his arm. Stretched almost an entire mile before sending it back twice the speed of sound, leaving behind a sonic boom. All this happening while Luffy looked at the stunned and helpless form of Buggy, "Never underestimate the power of a rubber band. Gum-Gum Snapshot!"

True to the name, Nami and Chouchou heard the snap a rubber band used after it is stretched and released. Only this sound was like of a bone snapping into two when Luffy's extended arm hit Buggy, sending the Clown of all Pirates flying. When Luffy relaxed his arm after the attack he turned to show Nami a regretful expression on his face, one that surprised her after witnessing the raven haired pirate take joy in crushing Buggy.

"I am sorry Nami." He said in a soft tone that complemented his expression perfectly. "I shouldn't have forced you see all this. A gentleman never spills blood in front of a lady such as yourself. You must think I am a monster now…" Luffy was cut off when he felt like someone crashed in him, causing him to only sway in the wind.

"You are such a wonderful and thoughtful young man, Luffy." Nami said, not the response that Luffy was expecting. "You don't have to worry about me. I have already seen blood spilled before. I can take it again." She must have said it to assure Luffy but now, the pirate wanted to know more and more about her.

Flashback Ends!

And he did. Luffy learned a lot more about Nami. And over the course from Orange Town to Syrup Village, the two had found themselves in a relationship. Still, Nami didn't get any private training in Haki; Luffy never wanted to play favorites even with his girlfriend. He was just lucky that Nami won't have it any other way and so far, she had gotten a good distance in the basics and she could just barley sense when Luffy comes in when she is taking a shower after training. It was not much but anything is always more than nothing.

End of Chapter 4.

*Can't believe that I decided to make one chapter into two! I thought that I will take too long if I had them into just one chapter so you have seen what I have done instead.*