Can I ?
Overwhelming, powerful urge that seized him since he woke up right there. And no doubt it could have been more confusing, he hadn't been the one seeking contact.
Back then, at an unknown hour, Yasuo had woken up and followed his instinct. It wasn't close enough, something pushed him for more. So he did what felt right and joined Yi in his bed. A similar emotion than when the latter had carried him to the village, this soft safety. To hold someone.
When Yi woke up and found him there, he feared he would take it wrong and maybe ask him to go back to his own bed. It never came. Instead, his soulmate took him closer and tightened the embrace. Everything he wanted right now.
All this led him to this exact instant, burning innerly to take more. It was so unfair to be already in love, while they barely knew each other. Yasuo's hand stayed where it was over the latter's cheek, slightest tremor in it.
I want to kiss him... To check if it was true, to show his own dedication. There were so many reasons to crave a kiss and their very situation made him ready to spill his affection.
Where did this come from ? It was probably the result of years waiting for someone he was sure to love. Now that he met him, logic disappeared and his very soul ached to give what he had kept for so long.
However Yasuo stopped himself from going further. It wasn't his choice to make, but theirs. With this chain of events they couldn't even have a proper talk about their relationship. Maybe Yi didn't need nor seeked that kind of relation. Anyway, it was too soon. Some wouldn't care but Yasuo did, despite his typical lack of patience. It would be such a shame if it drove away his own soulmate by acting recklessly.
So he stayed right, frozen in a stupid debate about taking their time or offering his attention.
Time stretched, passing so quickly for him. His heart was beating too fast, no doubt Yi heard it. Oh no. Why hide ? There was no use in denying his feelings. Although his body seemed to go instinctly closer, leaning into the latter's space until they shared the same air. One last gap to cross before they kissed.
And Yi, oh dear, he let him do. Not a single move to push him away, to question his intentions. Nothing except that curious gaze hinted with gentleness. It would be alright, if he kissed him. It felt safe enough.
Yet Yasuo decided not to, at least for now. They still had to get to know each other. He still yearned to know everything about his soulmate, past and present. Till they would be truly one.
Before he knew it, his face felt too hot, maybe the result of his thoughts and the rise of anticipation. So tense, as he held Yi.
Do something !
Soon it would turn awkward if he did nothing and let this silence settle between them. Eye contact was less easy as he grew embarrassed for this beginning of gesture stopped mid-way.
Gingerly, Yasuo gave a hasty yet meaningful peck to his cheek. Not exactly what he craved to offer but it would do. His own face heated up without he could do anything to prevent it. No... Really, it was so weird to feel that much, such specific emotions even more for someone he didn't really know. Yi would understand, this was why they were put together but this strange urge to show so much remained.
Not always he thought about acting and right now it wasn't the case. Consequences arrived and he returned to cuddle closely with the latter, face burried in his neck. Maybe it was for the best that he merely gave a chaste peck, further it could have shocked him innerly. Imagine, a kiss worthy of all the love he wanted to share.
For some time there were no words. Yi accepted him in his arms and rocked so faintly as one would to lull to sleep. Yasuo didn't dare to look up yet, not over his conflicted approach for a kiss. All would happen in due time, if it was to happen.
Until there was a short move from the latter then a kiss pressed to his forehead. It was real, Yasuo didn't dream that. On reflex he looked up as to seek truth. Yi did the same than him earlier, careful hand over his cheek to linger there.
Oh. Oh ? Was it time already ? Would they ?
Unlike what he expected, it was a smile that appeared, something quite sweet from a man hardened by war and discipline. Like a ray of sunlight during a cloudy day. Sunshine. There was beauty in everything and there he found it again, in peaceful intimacy.
« You, so bold in the battlefields, how come you're so shy now ? I was sure you'd already claim me for yourself, I could read it so clearly. Yet you didn't. » Just as his hand trailed from Yasuo's cheek to his jaw and neck, light touch. Otherwise the tone was quite curious, interested by the future answer.
It killed Yasuo and gave him life at the same time. This was so true it could have hurt if it was from someone else but he had no reasons to hide from this.
Everything was heavy of meaning. Yi would have let him if he went further. Maybe for the best, maybe not. Yasuo still couldn't escape his own reason.
Shaking his head, he tried to explain it the best he could : « I don't know, maybe it's too soon. I...I don't want you to feel pressured into this. I know that I love you a lot even if we barely know each other, because I can't help feeling like I at last found my place. It's fine if you don't love me. »
For an instant it stung to say this, even if it was very unlikely. Yasuo wanted to add 'yet', quite positive they were meant to get along but he wouldn't be sure until they talked.
Maybe that spark of sadness was seen – or felt – because Yi's hand returned to hold him gently, so cautious gaze over him.
« I do, please don't imagine the opposite. And you're right, it will still take time at least to get to know each other. But don't feel like you have to hold back. I'll accept everything from you. »
These words helped as much as the bandage over his wound. Healing. Yasuo didn't have a lot of fears about the future, even now that he had a soulmate but it was still a great relief to hear it was mutual. Accept everything ? Probably Yi meant he wouldn't mind his affection and different ways of showing. But he wasn't keen on sharing it fully so soon.
« Thank you. Like yeah, thanks a lot. Not saying I would have cried but maybe yes a little. I don't want to lose the soulmate I always dreamed of. » Not often he let his heart spoken so openly. A laugh escaped him, for the tension leaving. Everything was fine.
« I refuse to lose you too. You're more precious to me than you could imagine, even for such short time. »
Next minute was spent cuddling, after Yi coaxed him in a respectable position for such activity. Yasuo accepted gladly, nuzzling closer.
The topic still remained on his mind though. So dear feeling, warming his chest.
« Still, I'd love to know you. Everything about you, your family, your town. » It was maybe a lot to ask but he wanted to. Then curiosity hit once more, thoughts focusing on one specific thing. The mark. « Your mark. Where is it ? »
It became his new priority in no time, rush of impatience for a topic he cared so much about. Something he got almost obsessed during his childhood and young years. The proof they completed each other, that he deserved someone in his life despite what people told him.
With energy he rose and came on top of Yi, just above as his gaze betrayed cheer anticipation.
« Where is it ? Please...I can show you mine first, if you want. »
Before Yasuo could even show his own mark, the latter's hand slided up his arm till it covered the exact inked area. Along a light blush over Yi's cheeks, something quite pretty. Damn. He already knows ?
Under this probably disbelieving gaze, Yi spoke softly just as he stroked his mark with obvious reverence : « I found it earlier. When I was taking care of your wound. »
Now that was something else. New information. It was the latter who mended his wound, among everyone that could have done it in the village. Not such a big surprise, Yi could have wanted to do it himself but it still made him melt to realize that. Yasuo had woken up with his soulmate by his side because he fell asleep there after taking care of him.
So cute...
« You're making it really hard to hold back... » If his desperate gaze couldn't express his emotions good enough, this would help.
« You don't have to, Yasuo. But let's go back to what you seek. I can show you my mark. »
Thoughts shattered. His heart had so much difficulties to focus on only one thing and now Yi accepted to fulfil his request.
Yasuo nodded eagerly, already trying to guess where it could be. Only patience would give him his answer.
« Then I'll have to get up for this. Please don't fret. » Just as he said it, Yi rose and sat up in bed, even if it was a bit difficult considering the presence of a second person in a bed meant only for one.
As quick Yasuo followed and sat too, hands returning over the latter to resume contact. Never lost. Where is it ? Some people had their mark in the least expected place or the most difficult to reach. So he wondered quietly even though he couldn't stop himself from staring at Yi after each move.
Then Yi took off the top of his clothing, baring his chest. Fuck. What a good idea, Yasuo. In such close distance, he missed nothing from that wonderful sight, flesh and muscle revealed without an ounce of visible shame.
It's here ? His gaze wandered over free skin, where he deemed his hands unworthy to touch. Looking for a mark that was maybe there or Yi wouldn't take off his clothes.
While Yasuo searched, the latter moved again and this time turned his back to him. He would have felt a little sad if as quick his gaze hadn't fallen on Yi's mark.
Right there, on his back, just below his nape. Pretty ink over skin, ornating the best it could despite the crude message given. In less than a second Yasuo died of shame. I can't believe I've done this. The first words he ever told Yi and it was some swearing. Words he bore since his birth or so.
Victim of his own stupidity, Yasuo didn't really notice how tense the latter was, not completely relaxed. Yi brought a hand to his nape, rubbing there as to sooth a little. Then he turned lightly his head, to gaze at him as much as he could. The faintest touch of red coloring his face.
