AN: Work ran late today. Sorry for the later post.
Quick notes on how this one reads
Bold: Normal viewing scenes
Normal: Reactions
R: Bold: Singing
R: Bold Italics: Talking over music
Also, I highly recommend listening to the actual songs as we go. I changed some words around to fit characters, but the tunes are still the same. So I'll put a list of which songs are in each chapter at the beginning.
Chpt 1. Science Fiction/Double Feature and Dammit Janet
Enjoy!
After sending his father back, Gordeau walked to the theater and prepared himself for the worst. There were quite a few people who would not enjoy this viewing.
He looked around as he entered. Sun had moved behind Ren and Nora so he and Neptune could sit next to each other. Everyone else in the front row had slid down a seat except Ruby. Weiss had moved to the other side of her and Penny was now in Weiss's old spot.
Gordeau took his spot next to his father. Ozpin looked at him worriedly, "Where's Oscar?"
"Oh," Gordeau waved him off, "He was distracted by the farm I had set up and won't be joining us this time. It'll be fine."
Gordeau went to start the viewing but paused as he did, "I want everyone to know, don't take anything you see in this viewing seriously. There are way too many changes in this universe to make anything serious."
He received nods in agreement so he hit his button and the screen lit up.
A piano riff started as a set of lips flew at the screen.
"Wait, music?" Weiss wondered, "The last universe didn't have any music, did it?"
"Please don't tell me it's a musical," Sun grumbled.
Velvet clapped excitedly at the thought.
Ren's voice was heard singing, while the lips mouthed the words.
Nora swooned in her seat. She'd always imagined Ren's singing voice sounding amazing, but this was better than expected.
"It's a musical," Sun groaned.
R: Michael Rennie was ill the day the earth stood still, but he told us where we stand.
"Who did he say?" Jaune wondered.
"Not anyone I recognize," Blake mused.
"Why would it matter that dirt stood still? It happens all the time," Winter thought out loud.
"This universe does not take place on Remnant," Gordeau explained to dropped jaws, "Earth is what they call their planet."
Everyone went wide-eyed. Their host had told them weird things could happen but another planet? No one was prepared for that.
R: And Flash Gordon was there in silver underwear.
"That sounds like a superhero!" Ruby squealed.
"Sounds itchy," Qrow mumbled at the thought of silver underwear.
R: Claude Raines was the invisible man.
"Who's Claude Raines?" Tai asked, but received no answer.
"The invisible man, huh?" Roman wondered, "That would be amazing!"
Ilia shrugged, "Eh, it's overrated."
R: Then somethin' went wrong for Fay Wray and King Kong. They got caught in a celluloid jam.
"Ah, these must be actors from this other universe," Ozpin realized.
"Huh?" Ruby wondered.
"The word celluloid means old film," he explained, "Therefore, these must be movie stars."
"What kind of name is King Kong then?" Yang asked.
"Probably a stage name," Ren reasoned.
R: Then at a deadly pace, it came from outer space. And this is how the message ran,
Suddenly the lips stopped moving but Ren continued singing, with an unidentified female voice.
R: Science Fiction
"There's the proof of that," Ozpin observed.
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
R: Double Feature
Suddenly words appeared on screen, they read 'Jaune Arc (A Scientist)'
Yang began laughing, "Jaune? A scientist? I don't believe it!"
Jaune sighed, "You're not wrong."
R: Dr. X
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
'Weiss Schnee (A Heroine)'
"Oh, so I'm the focus of this universe?" She asked out loud, with a hint of pride.
"It would appear so," Winter nodded, "But this feels like a strange way to introduce the universe."
"Yeah," Qrow agreed, "It feels almost like the opening credits of a movie."
Gordeau shrugged, "I spiced it up a little to make it more entertaining."
R: Will build a creature.
R: See androids fighting
"I'm Combat Ready!" Penny joked receiving laughs from Team RWBY.
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
'Neptune Vasilias (A Hero)'
Weiss's air of pride deflated upon seeing who her, for lack of a better word, co-star was.
"Guess it's your time in the spotlight, dude," Sun elbowed Neptune in the ribs.
"Well, from what I heard you got the first one, it's only fair I get the second," he joked back.
R: Brad and Janet
'Lie Ren (A Handyman)'
"I think Ren's more a thinker than a hands-on guy," Velvet noted.
Ren nodded, "I've never been very good with tools."
R: Anne Francis stars in
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
'Nora Valkyrie (A Domestic)'
Pyrrha laughed out loud at the absurdity.
"Wait, what does that mean?" Nora asked frantically.
"I'm sorry," Pyrrha apologized as she laughed, "It means you're a maid."
Everyone else who knew Nora burst into laughter at the thought.
Nora turned beet red in embarrassment.
R: Forbidden Planet
'Ruby Rose (A Groupie)'
"A what?!" Yang, Tai, Summer, and quietly Weiss, yelled.
"What kind of sick universe are we watching?" Yang questioned.
Gordeau sighed, "I told you not to take it seriously!"
Ruby was secretly blushing at the connotations.
R: Woah, ho, ho, hoooo.
'Dr. Pietro Polendina (A Rival Scientist)'
"Father's in this?" Penny questioned, "It will be most enjoyable to see what he does."
"I'll finally get to see what your father looks like?" Ruby asked excitedly, much to Weiss's chagrin.
R: At the late-night,
'Cardin Winchester (A Creation)'
"Cardin?" Pyrrha asked, "Why is he here?"
"It would appear that this 'Cardin' and I something in common," Penny smiled.
"Trust me," Jaune looked at her, "You don't want that."
R: double feature, picture show.
'Penny Polendina (Ex Delivery Girl)'
"Hey, you're in this too, Penny!" Ruby exclaimed as the girl giggled.
'Peter Port (An Expert)'
"An expert on what? Boring people to death?" Qrow laughed out.
"Hey, Pete's a fun guy!" Tai defended.
"He's not bad," Yang admitted.
"And he does give good advice," Weiss noted.
A musical interlude occurred before the lips unfroze and Ren started back up.
R: I knew Leo G. Carroll, was over a barrel when tarantula took to the hills.
The lips licked themselves before continuing.
Most people found that lick disturbing, but Nora found herself slightly turned on by the display.
R: And I really got hot, when I saw Janette Scott fight a triffid that spits poison and kills.
R: Dana Andrews said prunes gave him the runs,
"Well, he's not wrong," Neo gagged out at the thought of prunes.
R: And passing them used lots of skills.
R: But when worlds collide, said George Pal to his bride, I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills, like a
The lips froze again, teeth barred.
R: Science fiction
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
R: Double feature. Dr. X
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
R: Will build a creature. See androids fighting,
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
R: Brad and Janet. Anne Francis stars in
F: (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
R: Forbidden Planet, Woah, ho, ho, hoooo.
R: At the late night, double feature, picture show. I wanna go. Woah, ho, hooooo
R: To the late night, double feature, picture show. By RKO. Woah, ho, hooo
R: To the late night, double feature, picture show. In the back row. Woah, ho, ho, hoooo
Roman smirked as a thought came to his head, "Fuck the back row!" he shouted causing the three in the back (and the two Roses) to glare at him.
R: To the late night, double feature, Pic-Ture-Show.
The lips fade out and wedding bells played as the screen changed to the exterior of a little white church.
The door to the church opened and Blake and Sun walked out. Blake in a wedding dress and Sun in what passes for a suit.
Sun's mouth fell open. After everything, a universe decided to taunt him about it.
Neptune patted his friend on the back.
Blake shifted uncomfortably. What a great way to start a relationship, by watching yourself get married to someone else.
"Still don't know what a suit is, huh Sun?" Yang quipped, oblivious to how Sun was feeling.
Velvet was in the foreground, holding her camera. She was the photographer hired for the wedding.
She approached the stairs as the wedding party got into position. Ghira and Kali were shown, though Ghira didn't look happy. In the background however, a poorly disguised Jaune, Nora, and Ren were standing like they belong.
Sun sighed, "I see your Dad still doesn't approve of me in this universe."
Blake smiled lightly at him.
Pyrrha turned to her team, "Why are you guys standing there?"
All three shrugged and turned back to the screen.
The picture was taken and the party dispersed slightly. Neptune approached Sun, "Hey, Sun! Congratulations!" Neptune was wearing an actual suit.
"Makes sense," Sun noted, "He was probably the best man."
Jaune turns around and has a conversation with Ren and Nora, but it is drowned out by the crowd.
Sun walked Neptune away from the crowd so they could have a conversation. Velvet stopped him first and offered him, "Congratulations!" before she left.
When they were a decent distance away from the crowd Sun began talking, "Well, I guess we really did it, huh?"
"We?" Neptune asked, only to receive shrugs in return.
Neptune didn't say anything but the two exchange chucks on the shoulder. (Stupid Custom)
"I don't think there's any doubt about that." Neptune finally said. "You and Blake have been almost inseparable since you met in Dr. Polendina's refresher courses."
"Father's a teacher?" Penny asked, "He would make a most excellent one! He is very smart."
Blake chuckled a little, "Well, that's certainly a more common meeting then what actually happened."
Sun and Team RWBY chuckled.
Sun smirked, "Well, to tell you the truth Nep, that was the only reason I showed up in the first place!"
Neptune sighed, "Yeah, that sounds like Sun. Always ditching us for one reason or another."
Sun weakly smiled and rubbed the back of his neck.
Sun gave a hearty laugh and another chuck to Neptune's shoulder. Neptune chuckled dryly, clearly not amused.
"Obviously this other me thinks the same thing!" he noted
Blake suddenly yelled to the crowd, "Okay, you guys, this is it! You ready?" She turned her back and threw the bouquet to the gathered women.
"Remember our wedding, Tai?" Summer reminisced.
"Yeah," Tai chuckled, "You threw the bouquet and Glynda of all people caught it. James tried to make a move on her instantly and she shot him down so hard, I thought the sky fell."
"Wait, the General and Professor Goodwitch?" Winter asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yeah," Qrow chuckled, "Ol' Jimmy's got it bad for her, but she always shoots him down. Don't know why though."
"And then Raven threw hers and…" Summer started, as Tai and Qrow went wide eyed.
"What?" Yang and Ruby yelled at the same time.
Summer looked at her two girls, who stared back in shock, then to Raven, who looked just as confused as she did. Finally, the two glared at Tai and Qrow.
"You never told them?" Summer asked in disappointment.
"Tai," Raven warned.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking, Qrow thought.
"Fine," Tai yelled, "No, I never told them because Yang almost got them both killed looking for you, Raven."
Raven's mouth fell open in shock, she knew Yang had looked for her, but not at the expense of her safety.
"Qrow saved them, thankfully," Tai continued, "But I didn't want Ruby to have the same obsession with finding you that Yang did, okay?"
The two women glared at him, but admitted he had a point.
"Wait," Yang stood up and turned around, "So you BOTH married Dad at the same time?"
"Well, technically we all married each other, but yes," Summer said softly, "We all loved each other, so it only felt natural to us."
"So, then why…" Ruby started, but was quickly interrupted.
"Ok, I, of all people, understand family drama," Gordeau sighed, "But can you please talk about this later?"
After a few begrudging nods, everyone sat back down.
After a small fight, Weiss came up with it, "I got it! I got it!" She said, excitedly. She was wearing a light purple dress and a white hat.
"Well, well Wiess," Yang joked, trying to forget the revelation that just happened, "Who's the lucky person?"
Weiss shot Yang a glare, but its effect was lessened by her deep blush.
Sun looked over to Neptune, "Hey, big fella, looks like it's your turn next, hey?"
"What?" Weiss asked dryly, as the blush left her face.
Neptune smirked and cleared his throat, "So, the two of us together again, huh? Doesn't this make you want to give it another go, Snow Angel?"
"No," Weiss replied shortly.
A car horn honked and the wedding car pulled up. It was all blue, but written in streamers on the side was the message, 'Wait til tonite. She got hers, now he'll get his!'
Yang and Blake chocked on the implications of the phrase.
Sun's eyes widened and he looked away quickly.
Ruby blushed slightly but made sure no one saw it.
Neptune looked at the ground and chuckled, "Who knows."
Sun gave him one last chuck on the shoulder and turned to the vehicle. Neptune became pensive and rubbed his chin in thought.
"Uh, oh," Neptune thought, "That's my, 'I've got something big planned look."
"Yeah, doesn't show up very often though, does it?" Sun teased.
"Shut up, dude!" Neptune lightly shoved his best friend.
Sun and Blake drove off, being chased by a cheering wedding party. Eventually, the cheers died down as the car disappeared from sight and the party dispersed save Neptune, Weiss, Ghira, and Kali.
"Oh, Neptune," Weiss started in a fantastic mood, "wasn't it wonderful? Didn't Blake look radiantly beautiful?"
"Yeah she did," Yang absentmindedly commented.
Blake blushed at the sentiment.
"Oh, I can't believe it," she continued, messing with the bouquet as she did, "An hour ago, she was plain old Blake Belladonna. And now – Now she's Mrs. Sun Wukong."
"Ugh," Mercury groaned, "This is so sappy! Wake me up when it's over, will ya' Em?" He kicked his feet up and closed his eyes.
Emerald rolled hers and kept watching.
Cinder and Adam stared at the walls, bored out of their minds.
Raven would have as well, if her eyes weren't focused on Ruby. If she didn't know, why was she trying so hard to get me back on her side? Is she even more like Summer than I thought?
Weiss sighed and looked longingly at Neptune. He turned away from her and walked down the stairs, into the church's graveyard. "Yes, Weiss. Sun's a lucky guy."
"Well that one is," Sun muttered under his breath.
Weiss looked after him confused, "Yes."
Weiss pinched the bridge of her nose. She didn't want to think about herself and Neptune right now.
They walked past Ghira and Kali and overheard Kali say, "Oh, I always cry at weddings."
"MOM!" Blake blushed, even though her mother was not present.
"Me too," Summer admitted, with tears in her eyes.
Yang and Ruby joined in Blake's embarrassment.
"Wait," Tai sat up, "Those are your parents?"
Blake nodded and Tai grumbled in jealousy. Sun was right, Blake's dad was more muscular than him.
Neptune continued, but his social anxiety was kicking in, "Uh, everyone knows that Blake's a wonderful little cook."
"No she is not!" Ilia and Adam called out at the same time.
"Oh, come on!" Yang rolled her eyes, "She can't be that bad."
"The entire camp out for an entire week over some noodles!" Adam sighed.
"Seriously," Ilia advised, "Do not let her cook for you."
"Are you guys ever going to let me live that down?" Blake sighed.
"No," Adam retorted.
"Aw, I'll try your cooking Blakey!" Yang smiled at her.
"Your funeral," Ilia shrugged.
Weiss figured out what was going on, but she wanted Neptune to say it, "Yes."
Crows (not that Qrow) were heard in the background as the two were now standing in front of a sign that said 'Denten: The Home of Happiness.'
"Denten?" Winter asked, "I'm guessing the town this takes place in?"
Gordeau nodded.
"If this place is the home of happiness," Tai began, "I'd hate to see what the home of sadness looks like! Eh? Guys?"
The room glared at him. He shrugged and leaned back; arms folded behind his head.
An awkward silence occurred with Neptune still avoiding the subject at hand, "Why, Sun himself – he'll be in line for a promotion in a year or two."
Weiss was annoyed but kept up her happy façade, "Yes."
A music sting played and Neptune finally addressed the subject.
N: Look Janet,
W: Yes, Brad?
"Those aren't our names," Weiss scoffed.
"I don't know where they came from," Gordeau admitted, "They only show up in this part of the universe and are never mentioned again, so for the sake of this section, Janet is Weiss and Brad is Neptune."
"That's a stupid name," Neptune grumbled.
N: I've got something to say.
W: Uh, huh?
N: I really love the skillful way,
N: You beat the other girls,
"Beating? Who are we beating?" Mercury shot awake.
Emerald snickered at him and Cinder rolled her eyes.
"I would actually like to know the same thing," Weiss noted, "Why am I beating other girls?"
N: To the bride's bouquet.
"Oh," Weiss and Mercury both said, though Weiss's was in realization and Mercury's was in disappointment.
"That was an awkward place to pause the thought," Weiss noted.
W: Oh, oh Brad!
The music picked up as Neptune started singing. He ran back towards the church as he did. Ren and Nora were singing background vocals while still in their disguises.
N: The river was deep but I swam it.
"Not bad, Blue," Roman complimented, "Though I'm a little upset my girl's not in this so I could hear her sing for the first time."
Ilia nodded her sentiments and Neo blushed.
Neptune had a strange look on his face, "Isn't that the same guy that tried to kill us with a paladin?" he asked Sun.
"Yep," Sun nodded, "It was weird at first for me too, but you get used to it."
Ruby giggled, "Neptune swimming."
R, NO: Janet
N: The future is ours, so let's plan it.
R, NO: Janet
N: So please, don't tell me to can it.
"Can it, Neptune," Weiss retorted to the screen.
Neptune, Winter and the rest of team RWBY looked at her in shock.
"First Blake, now Weiss?" Yang asked, "I'd ask if the world was ending, but that already happened."
"I can be funny!" Weiss retorted.
Neptune looked away in disappointment.
Winter smiled. Being around these people had really changed her sister for the better.
R, NO: Janet
They arrived back in front of the church, Ren and Nora were still standing in front of the doors. Neptune and Weiss locked hands.
N: I've one thing to say and that, dammit, Janet, I love you!
"Okay," Nora stood up, "I'm putting my foot down on this now! If either of you two comment on how you're not together again, I will break your legs!"
Weiss immediately shut her mouth.
"Good, now let's watch Iceberg," she sat down.
"What?" Neptune asked.
"Pair names," Sun explained, "I'd guess that's you and Weiss."
"Why would you call it that?" Weiss asked.
Nora smirked, "Because it was always destined to crash!"
Neptune sighed and Weiss smiled.
Weiss sighed in approval and leaned into kiss him. Just before their lips locked however, Neptune started singing again, running backwards toward the church.
"Wow, blocked by a song," Ilia laughed.
Neo leaned over and kissed her, "Good thing we don't have to worry about that."
N: The road was long but I ran it.
R, NO: Janet
N: There's a fire in my heart and you fan it!
"With what? Her arctic wind?" Emerald taunted. Unknown to most, she secretly had a soft spot for musicals.
"Hey!" Weiss protested.
R, NO: Janet
N: If there's one fool for you than I am it.
R, NO: Janet
Neptune suddenly produced a piece of chalk and drew a heart on the church doors.
N: I've one thing to say and that's, dammit, Janet, I love you!
Weiss swooned and joined him on the stairs. Neptune got down on his knees and pulled out a small box.
"Okay," Neptune said with wide-eyes, "Well, there's something I wouldn't do."
"Wait, why?" Jaune asked, "If you find the right person, you should marry them."
Pyrrha leaned against Jaune shoulder as he finished.
"No, not that," Neptune shook him off, "I would never upstage my bro by proposing on his wedding day. It's his day, not mine."
N: Here's the ring to prove that I'm no joker.
Weiss gasped as he did. And nodded feverishly. Ren was seen wiping the chalk off the door.
Weiss internally sighed. She figured she was going to be doing that a lot about this version of her's behavior, so she was mentally doing it.
N: There's three ways that love can grow
"Well, there's definitely more than three," Neo huffed.
"Yes, love can be seen all around us, but it blooms in many different ways! I don't understand them all, but my father has been trying to explain it to me," Penny stated.
The people who knew the girl prior to her resurrection were astounded at her new maturity.
N: That's good, bad, or mediocre.
"Or he could mean that!" Neo laughed out, "And here I was thinking he was getting political."
"And I thought he was getting philosophical," Penny admitted.
Neptune tried to slip the ring onto Weiss's finger, but dropped it.
"Smooth," Sun quipped, "And I just realized that may be the first time I've ever said that to you sarcastically."
"Boring," Mercury waved his hands in the air and Emerald elbowed him.
Weiss picked it up and put it on herself.
N: Oh, J-A-N-E-T I love you so!
Weiss ran into the church, causing Neptune to fall flat on his face. Weiss took over the song.
Everyone who was paying attention, Neptune included, laughed at his misfortune.
W: Oh-ho, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had.
RE, NO, RU: Oh, Brad
Ren, Nora, and a newly appearing, but equally badly disguised Ruby were changing the church décor to that of a funeral.
"Welcome to the chorus Ruby!" Nora cheered. Even if there were no explosions, she was having fun watching herself sing.
"At least you both cover me up," Ruby replied timidly, "I don't sing."
W: Now were engaged and I'm so glad.
RE, NO, RU: Oh, Brad
W: That you've met Mom, and you know Dad.
Weiss's face scrunched, "I would actually prefer it if my significant other didn't personally know my parents."
Winter sighed, "I agree, though with Father being who he is I doubt we'll get that lucky."
RE, NO, RU: Oh, Brad.
W: I've one thing to say and that's, Brad, I'm mad for you too.
The pair started walking down the aisle as if they were getting married that instant.
W: Oh, Brad.
N: Oh, dammit!
W: I'm mad.
N: Oh, Janet.
The pair reached the alter.
W: For You
N: I love you too
N, W: There's one thing left to do, ah hoo.
Ren, Nora, and Ruby brought in a casket as Neptune started singing again.
"Well, that's awkward," Yang chuckled, "I'm sure the staff just loves them hanging around while a funeral is being prepped."
N: And that's go see the man who began it.
RE, NO, RU: Janet
N: When we met in his science examit
"That's not a word," Blake commented.
"He was probably running out of words that rhyme with Janet," Ren reasoned.
RE, NO, RU: Janet
N: Made me give you the eye and then panic.
RE, NO, RU: Janet
The trio were now standing behind the casket, while Neptune and Weiss stood in front of it.
N: I've one thing to say and that's, dammit, Janet, I love you.
Weiss ran into Neptune's arms and the pair began dancing.
"See?" Jaune noted, "You can dance!"
"Not that well," Neptune grumbled.
N: Dammit, Janet.
W: Oh, Brad, I'm mad.
N: Dammit, Janet.
W, N: I. Love. You.
The pair kissed as the music ended. The disguised trio looked on very disinterested before the camera cut.
AN: Welcome one and all to The Cardin Winchester Picture Show! To be honest, this first chapter was not as fun to write reactions to as I thought it would be, but I know things will pick up as we go along. While I've listed the cast already, I'll give what little reasoning I do have when we first see each character.
Brad Majors: Neptune Vasilias. The only reason for this is because of his past connection to Weiss. There are a few moments later that fit Neptune well so be on the look out for them.
Janet Weiss: Weiss Schnee. Honestly, the name was the only reason Weiss is here.
The casting for this viewing is very loose. This viewing is really only to show good guys in the villain roles. So the warning at the beginning applies to everyone reading as well. Please don't expect a lot of story advancement this universe. There will be some though.
