Chapter 26 - Sharingan

"Sooooo," Anko said once they had stepped onto the Academy balcony and she had offered Kakashi a cigarette, "is it true that you're seeing the Haruno girl?"

So the news had spread this far already.

"Kind of, yeah," Kakashi murmured. He passed back the lighter, inhaled deeply and watched the smoke weave a complex pattern into the air as it left his mouth.

"No wonder you've lost interest in me," Anko sighed dramatically. "She's drop dead gorgeous."

"Mhm," Kakashi agreed, feeling acutely uncomfortable. He would never learn to like discussing his private affairs.

"But that child isn't yours," Anko said and pointed her chin at Sarada below in the courtyard. The girl was peeking out from behind Iruka to observe the Shuriken practice of those who had recently entered the Academy.

That false rumor had spread too? Now that he liked. Kakashi grinned at Anko who grinned back. What had he said about the fictional mother? A beautiful woman whom he had met in the Land of Waves, born with a rare disease and doomed to die early. Ah, so tragic.

"She's clearly an Uchiha," Anko continued. "You'd have to be blind not to see it - hair, eyes, body shape. She's about what… five? Six maybe? When did Sasuke do that?"

The when was less interesting to Kakashi than the why... though maybe the when and the why were connected? Had Sasuke already known he was ill back then? Had it been desperation? Or had he slept with Karin right around the time of his wedding to Sakura because he had gotten cold feet?

Kakashi took another drag off the cigarette, looking up at the light blue sky with its puffy white clouds. He was familiar with men who panicked before marriage, fearing they'd be trapped afterwards and therefore felt a need to sleep with as many women as they could get their hands on - from Master Jiraiya's book series. He had always wondered what it would feel like… knowing you were about to vow to spend the rest of your life with one person? In his imagination, it had to feel amazing - but what did he know.

"Yours or not, Hatake Kakashi walking around with a cute kid in tow is a security risk," Anko teased him, "thousands of ovaries have exploded all over town, I will have to file a complaint with the Hokage."

"Not a good time for that," Kakashi murmured.

Shizune had told him what was wrong with Tsunade. It was Dan Kaito's death day today. Apparently, that plunged the Hokage into a very deep depression for several days before and after. She had gotten so drunk and medicated the night before Shizune had needed to use advanced medical jutsu to revive her. Here was another extreme, Kakashi mused. A person still so caught up in the grief of losing a loved person after decades, she could not move on.

It also explained her comment about the psychological checks that she thought she wouldn't pass.

"Anko, did you hear about the new checks they want to add to the physicals?" Kakashi asked the woman looking at him with her eyebrows raised.

"You didn't listen to a single word I said, right?" she laughed. "Get a grip. It's dangerous to be distracted in your line of work."

"Sorry," Kakashi said. "What were you saying?"

"Not much. Just that I'm sad you won't come see me anymore. You don't know how delighted I was when you rang my doorbell."

"I'm not dead, I can still visit you," Kakashi said, "like now. I'll just keep my clothes on."

Anko laughed. "That's fine. And you can come cry at my shoulder anytime if you need to."

Why would he…?

"Sorry," she said when she caught the look on his face, "I didn't mean to imply anything."

But she just had.

"Well…," she said with an expert mien, "everybody knows how obsessed the Haruno girl is with that Uchiha. Or maybe the word I am looking for is devoted? Self-sacrificing? I mean… she even married him. Cold, arrogant bastard that he is. Scary dude."

"He's not that bad," Kakashi defended him by reflex.

"Oh boy, you gonna need that shoulder," Anko sighed. "I don't even understand how you manage to be cold and efficient when it comes to your missions and so extremely nice and considerate when it comes to everything else."

"I'm not that nice," Kakashi murmured, feeling his ears grow hot.

"The nicest," Anko beamed at him, "You just have a way to make people feel good. Ah, I'm getting very sentimental right now. Take care of yourself, Kakashi. Life hasn't exactly been kind to you. All I want for you is to be happy."

Was today the day people made cryptic remarks about his life and his state of mind? Apparently.

"Goddamn," Anko continued, furtively brushing at her eyes, "sometimes I think about all the people who died and cry for hours. Please don't die on me, Hatake."

"Why should I die, I'm not even going on missions at the moment," Kakashi replied sourly.

"Tsunade put you in charge of the Uchiha offspring? Hmmmmm, is that going to go down well with everybody?"

"Sasuke's legs will have to mend and then I'm no longer needed," Kakashi said, sounding much more nonchalant than he felt.

That talk with Sasuke? He had to have it soon but he wasn't exactly looking forward to it. What should he say? Sorry I slept with your wife? Well, he wasn't sorry. And even though Kakashi knew he should say something like I will stop now, Sasuke. You're back. I am glad you are, he didn't want to stop. In fact, he wanted to rush to the hospital and make love to Sakura right this very moment. He hadn't seen her for a few hours and that was several hours too much.

"That girl couldn't have the Sharingan yet," Anko mused, "she's much too young."

"Hm," Kakashi said, "I don't have a good feeling about it. Her mother dropped her in our laps like her heels were on fire. I haven't been able to find out what happened where she came from, but the child has certainly seen horrible things."

"Itachi was eight when he got his and I remember that was considered pretty early? But then… who knows with that clan. I always thought we had seen the worst of it and then Madara reappeared."

"Maybe I'm wrong," Kakashi said, "I really hope for Sarada's sake she didn't yet have to go through a trauma that awakened the Uchiha's bloodline trait."

"I get you," Anko said and stubbed out her cigarette. "Nothing good ever came from those eyes."

Unless you considered the exhilarating power they gave you as good. The speed. The ability to read your enemy's movement almost before he knew what he was going to do. And the genjutsu abilities… Kakashi had always liked those the most.

"So, you said you're here about the Chunin exams. Are you nervous about proctoring?" Anko giggled. "It's enough if you just stand around and look intimidating. You're a living legend, those kids will shit their pants when they even catch a glimpse of you."

"That's horrible!" Kakashi frowned. "You want me to be a scarecrow?"

"Horrible? Why?" Anko laughed. "We were thinking about bringing some wild animals from the other nations into the forest this year … but the logistics! Such a nightmare."

"So you thought to put a wild Kakashi and some of his shadow clones there instead," Kakashi snickered.

"Don't say such things or you'll make me sad again," Anko sighed. "I want my access to wild Kakashi restored soon! In the meantime… do you want another cigarette?"

Kakashi shook his head. "I shouldn't smoke. My physical is coming up soon."

"So?" Anko shrugged. "I know how fit you are. Didn't you even get extremely drunk the night before once? Oh, I remember! It was Might Guy's birthday. My god, that was an escapade! And you still got all the points, haha. We were even there to cheer you on."

Kakashi scratched his head. Ah, well… Might Guy and his challenges. He had never been able to turn a single one down. "Those days are over, Anko. Anbu rules are extremely strict. You should experience Yamato when he suspects I'm in danger of putting on weight. Geez."

"He seems to have found the perfect place to do all the nagging he wants!" Anko laughed. "He's such a pain at times, really!"

"Anko, about those changes Tsunade mentioned? Are you not certified to be an examiner? You should know the details."

Anko nodded. "Yeah, I'm certified, not for the Anbu though, you guys never let any outsiders near any of your operatives. I did hear about the extra tests. The other nations are pushing for it and there are many in favor of a standardized procedure and the testing being done by some random examiner from another village. I think it's a great idea, to be honest. That should take care of the crazies that you don't want to be running around."

"Tsunade suggested… I could have an issue because of it," Kakashi admitted.

"You?" Anko looked him over. "Pfffft, what are you not telling me? Your nightmares seem to have gotten better? You don't run around volunteering to kill people in masses anymore, right? Hey, I remember that dark Kakashi well. We used to watch you walk around the village like an evil twin version of yourself. You're no longer that guy, thankfully."

"Thanks," Kakashi said.

That guy… that guy eaten up by guilt and a desire for self-destruction, she meant. The guy who had welcomed the brutality of Anbu and had killed more people than anybody else in the hope he could wash off Rin's blood with the blood of others. The guy who had joined Danzo's Root without a moment of hesitation because the less feelings, the better. He even remembered thinking that he wanted more of the organization's brainwashing because he wanted to forget who he was more quickly.

But was it possible to leave all this behind for good?

Kakashi put his arms on the balcony railing and looked down at the chattering children below. If he had one wish for Konoha, than it was that this generation could grow up untouched by the horrors of war. And for Sarada, he wished that she was young enough to forget.

"Why, do you feel you might have an issue?"

…like putting seals in his own head? That sounded like quite a lot of issues to him.

Anko put her hand on his shoulder and pressed it.

"Hey, you know you've got friends, right? I hope that's the one thing you've learned since that time. No need to shut down and walk around like an undead person again, do you hear me?"

"I hear you," Kakashi murmured and briefly pressed her hand in turn. "Let's all go for a drink once Might Guy is back, okay?"

"If he gets back," Anko laughed. "I heard he met somebody on his hot spring trip!"

"Extraordinary!" Kakashi exclaimed. "A real person?"

With every hour that he stayed, it became harder to leave. Konoha was a warm and comforting place. It had become a substitute for what had been taken from him. A mother, a father, a friend.

But his gut told him something he didn't like to acknowledge. A traitor to the Hokage was a traitor to his village. A traitor to his village did not deserve to bath in its warmth. The things that lay hidden behind the white walls of mist in his head… did he really want to know what it was?

###

"Should I tell the patient you are unwell?" the nurse asked with a shy glance at Sakura's reddened eyes when she returned from the toilet. "She wasn't scheduled but said you know her well and would take her even at short notice."

Sakura shook her head. "No, it's alright. Thanks."

She was going to hug and kiss Ino for making a nurse come and interrupt Sasuke - and then she would cry her eyes out on her shoulder. Couldn't Sasuke just have stayed cold and arrogant? His sad eyes, his plea… it was already haunting her.

I am not wavering, Sakura asked herself in panic, am I? I can't… I can't deal with him any longer, it's killing me.

But when she saw Ino's pale, sweaty face, Sakura swallowed down her own tears that needed spilling so badly. They could wait.

"Ino! What is wrong?"

Sakura rushed to her friend's side, grabbed her arm and led her to one of the comfortable chairs. That chair. Kakashi had held her in it. At the memory, she felt a yearning so strong she almost whimpered. I want to run away from here, she thought, I want to run to him and forget everything while he holds me.

"I… I need your help, Sakura," Ino said.

"Of course. What can I do?" Sakura asked, her hand moving to Ino's wrist to take her pulse. Much too fast.

"I… I think I'm pregnant," Ino sobbed.

Oh! Sakura felt huge relief. She had feared it was something bad.

"Let me check," Sakura said. "Come, lie down. Did you take a test?"

Ino nodded and climbed onto the treatment couch. That treatment couch. Kakashi had held her there too.

"But I know they're not reliable," Ino said with a quivering voice.

"Did it say you're not pregnant?" Sakura asked.

"Yes," Ino nodded again. "But I don't know… it's strange. It's like I'm no longer alone in my body, you know? I got so scared!"

Sakura went to the corner to get the ultrasound equipment. It was too early to see anything, but Ino was a sensory type kunoichi. Together with the ultrasound, it was possible she would feel new life within her better - or could convince herself there was nothing.

"Are you still on birth control?" Sakura asked. She had last given Ino pills a while ago. It was possible her friend had run out.

"Yes," Ino said. "I might have forgotten to take it once or twice, but… yes."

"And you missed your period how long ago?"

"Two days."

"Hm," Sakura said. "It could just be late?"

"I'm never late," Ino said, "my period is so regular you could make it the basis for a calendar."

"Ino," Sakura even found the strength to smile a little, "are you perhaps more stressed than usual? That often explains irregularities in the monthly cycle. It can happen quite suddenly."

"Yes, I'm very stressed," Ino exclaimed. "My god, I can't be pregnant…"

"It's not that bad if you are," Sakura said. "It's not an illness or anything. And aren't you and Sai..."

"He started training when he thinks I don't see it!" Ino shouted. "The idiot is still thinking about re-joining the Anbu. It's all Kakashi Sensei's fault. Why did he have to look so cool and mysterious that night?"

"It's hardly a decision you take at a whim," Sakura cautioned. "Sai might be… bored?"

"Oh no," Ino began crying in earnest. "I bore him. I bore him already! And now I'm pregnant, what am I going to do, what am I going to do…"

"Shhh," Sakura said and began massaging some pressure points on Ino's wrist and arm to calm her down. "Of course he's not bored with you. He is very, very smitten. He looks at you all the time like he has never seen anything more beautiful in his life."

Just like Kakashi had looked at her this morning, in his apartment. She was already addicted to it.

"I don't want to be a widow like Kurenai," Ino continued sobbing.

"Ino, dear," Sakura said, "that's getting ahead of things a bit, don't you think? Let's first do a thorough check and then see what it means. Sai is very much here and not dead. He is also not going on missions. You won't be a widow."

"Garbage birth control," Ino slammed both her hands onto the couch. "Be careful, Sakura. I know you don't want any babies either!"

For a short moment, Sakura's breath wanted to stop and her hand flitted to her belly. Had she taken her pills in the last few days? She wasn't sure! Certainly not last night.

"Tsunade will love you if you are pregnant," she said with a forced smile, trying to push panicky thoughts out of her head. "She's very much trying to get people to make more babies. I once had a huge fight with her. She really wanted to forbid the selling of birth control pills!"

"That woman is wacko," Ino sighed, "sorry, no offense to the Hokage, may she live extra long and prosperous."

"Let me do a blood test," Sakura said, preparing a syringe. "It'll take a few hours for the results to be ready."

"Sakura, is it true what I heard? Are you and Kakashi Sensei really kissing on the streets, you impressive floozie?"

"Where did you hear that?" Sakura asked surprised at the unexpected change of topics and felt her face grow hot.

"I run a flower shop, remember?" Ino answered. "It's spring, people buy a lot of flowers. It was the the topic number one this morning."

"Oh," Sakura said and swallowed. Well, let them talk. She would kiss whomever wherever she felt like it. "Yes, I kissed him. But hey, it was only a peck. On top of his mask. People should get a life."

"Oh my," Ino smirked. "You move fast, dearie. So tell me!"

"Tell you… tell you what?" Sakura gulped, looking for a good vein, which was easy with Ino's alabaster skin.

"I want to know eeeeeeverything," Ino said. "Have you slept with him? How was it? Did you feel guilty? Will you do it again? Oh, and! Have you seen his face?! Ouch!"

Sakura collected the blood she needed, extracted the needle and rang the bell on her desk for the nurse.

"I have seen his face," she admitted.

"And?!" Ino sat up.

Sakura pressed her lips together and made a sign to show that they were sealed.

"Come ooooon," Ino groaned. "I've never been this close to finding out. Can you at least tell me whether I was right to crush on him? He's extremely handsome, yes?"

"Yes," Sakura admitted, feeling like squealing as she said it, "extremely handsome."

"Oh my god," Ino said, temporarily forgetting her own crisis, "no doubt about it, you have slept with him. That's why you look so radiant. How many times?"

"Ino…," Sakura laughed. "We're not at some bar for chitchat. Didn't you come here to see your doctor? Lie down."

"Sorry," Ino said and complied. "I'm excited for you. Oh, shouldn't I be? But don't worry, people were only mildly scandalized. Everybody hates Sasuke."

Everybody hates Sasuke. That statement sobered Sakura immediately.

"He doesn't deserve that," she said quietly.

"Oh bb," Ino sighed, "maybe he does."

The nurse came in and Sakura handed her the vial for the test. Maybe he did.

"He has a child, Ino," Sakura blurted out as soon as the nurse had left again, "did you hear about that too?"

"What?!" apparently her friend hadn't heard.

"It's a girl. She's around five. The mother is…," Sakura had to swallow before she could say the name. "Karin. That red-haired crazy person who ran around with Sasuke when he defected?"

"Oh shit," Ino said with empathy.

"The little girl is living with us," Sakura added, feeling anger rise inside of her again, "as if… as if I'm responsible for her!"

"Just leave his sorry ass," Ino said coldly. "He can make children with other women? Then let him take care of these children with these other women."

"She ran away," Sakura said bitterly.

"Then he can be a single father," Ino shrugged. "I'm so sorry this is happening to you, girlfriend. Well, at least you have a certain silver haired shinobi to enjoy! Do so as long as you have the chance. I'm sure he is treating you like a queen. I always imagined he's that kind of man."

"He's very kind," Sakura agreed quietly. "I just wish I had realized how important that is much earlier."

"Wow, my appreciation for you would have skyrocketed if you had seduced your teacher all those years ago."

"What? No!" Sakura said truly shocked. "I never thought about it once back then! He was my Sensei!"

"Pah," Ino laughed, "all the more interesting if it's taboo. Hm, but you can't fall in love with him," she added sternly. "That would get much too messy."

"Yes," Sakura agreed, though she didn't quite understand what Ino was referring to. She put some gel on Ino's stomach. "We'll use the ultrasound now," she told her. "Let me know if you see anything you think could be a baby?"

"Dammit," Ino said soberly and moved a little so that she could see the screen better. "I'm scared, Sakura. I'm not ready to be a mother!"

Was anybody?

"Children don't usually ask for permission to come into our lives," Sakura sighed.

And when they did, it wasn't their fault. I'm sorry, Sarada, Sakura thought. It's not your fault. I will really try to like you in the future. Give me a bit of time, okay?

###

"You did well today, Sarada," Iruka smiled, "you're getting the hang of it."

Kakashi thought it better not to comment. If Iruka considered the change from immediately dropping to not dropping the shuriken before refusing to throw it as "getting the hang of it", she had indeed gotten the hang of it. In his opinion, they should just leave the poor kid alone and accept that Uchiha or not, Sarada had not inclination whatsoever to be a shinobi.

They were escorting the girl back to the Hokage Tower after a few hours at the Academy, where she had spent half the time crying and the other half hiding behind either Kakashi or Iruka.

"Kakashi-san," Iruka said, "I hear you will proctor the Chunin exams?"

"Yes," Kakashi sighed.

"Excuse me for asking," Iruka continued, "are you going to be very harsh on the kids?"

Kakashi raised his eyebrows at his junior, feeling a twinge of irritation. Iruka would express the same qualms again?

"Iruka," he said trying to be patient. "Did I not tell you many years ago that you need to be able to let go once they advance to the Chunin exams? I will do what I will do however I want to do it."

"Yes, of course," Iruka said stubbornly. "But… there are a few who are perhaps a bit more delicate than in previous years. Times have changed, Kakashi-san. We're now…"

"More delicate?" Kakashi echoed. "Iruka. Someone who is 'delicate' should not be a shinobi. I wish I could change the world, but even though many have tried to do exactly that, we are still not living in perpetual peace."

"Even so," Iruka insisted. "The old ways have served us well, but have times not changed?"

Had they?

"From where I'm standing," Kakashi said firmly, "things are still the same. Delicate people die. Fearful people die. Nice people die. Every vulnerability is punished and if you're unlucky, it's not you who loses your life because of a mistake you made, but your comrades. I will not let anyone who cannot live with this pressure pass, Iruka. I consider that my duty."

Iruka took a deep breath. He seemed to want to say something more, but didn't.

"I'm sorry," Kakashi added a bit more mildly. "I know how much you care for the children. But because you do, you should trust people like me to make the right call. Consider each failure a blessing."

"How can you live like this?" Iruka blurted out.

Like this? Knowing that each mission could be the last? Knowing that death was far more powerful than life? That even when you gave your very best, it was often not enough? Yeah… how?

"Day by day, you try to notice the good things," Kakashi answered. "A special flower that blooms. The wind that brings the scent of pine trees to your nose. An interesting formation of clouds. Friends that tell you they're there for you. A warm…" embrace. A woman you want to give the world to. Looking at her beauty when she sleeps peacefully. Love. Do it for love.

"I admire you," Iruka breathed.

"Please don't," Kakashi said drily. "I am bound to disappoint you. Iruka, you are Konoha's best teacher. I envy every child who is taught by you. You do not need to admire someone who walks the path of death."

Again, it seemed to Kakashi that Iruka wanted to say something more but couldn't get himself to. They had a lot in common, Kakashi mused as he studied the earnest, slightly troubled face. Iruka was an orphan like him. Had he lived at the orphanage too? He should ask him about Mrs. Nohara. Did he know her?

"Iruka, do you…," he began, but he got interrupted by a noise further down the street that drew quickly closer.

"Senseis! Seeeenseis!"

There was only one shinobi in this village who shouted like this.

"Naruto," Kakashi smiled at the yellow haired enthusiast who ran up to them like an overeager puppy, "are you back from your mission?"

It was always a joy to see the number one hyperactive, knucklehead ninja.

"Kakashi Sensei, are you alright?" Naruto asked all agitated. "I just heard what happened. What is this talk about Susanoos attacking Konoha? That's impossible! Didn't we conclude that the only Uchiha who still has two Mangekyo Sharingans is Sasuke?"

Not quite, apparently.

"Hi, Naruto!" Iruka said, sounding a bit miffed to be excluded from his favorite pupil's greetings, "nice to see you."

"I'm fine," Kakashi said, "nothing but a bruised ego. Yamato and some others are working on finding out more about it."

"Sasuke got hurt?" Naruto wanted to know.

"Yes," Kakashi nodded. "But he's much better already."

"But Susanoos? Something's not right," Naruto murmured, furrowing his brow as he forced his brain to think hard.

Kakashi sighed. Still not quite Hokage material.

"Oh," Naruto suddenly said, "who is that?"

Sarada was cautiously peeking out her head from behind Iruka to watch him.

"Hi!" Naruto smiled and went down into a squat to bring his face to her level, "I haven't seen you around, even though you look oddly familiar. I'm Naruto!"

"She's my new private pupil," Iruka boasted. "Hokage's orders!"

"Then you're lucky," Naruto smiled at Sarada, "Iruka Sensei is the best teacher in Konoha… No offense, Kakashi Sensei," he quickly added, with a side-glance at Kakashi. "You're the … second best. And the scariest."

"What an honor," Kakashi scoffed.

"Oh, Kakashi Sensei!" Naruto remembered, straightening himself. "Why I'm here. Granny Hokage said I should talk to you about something reaaaally strange I saw on my mission?"

"Yes?" Kakashi said.

"Do you remember that red-headed weirdo who was so into Sasuke she wanted to lick him and stuff? I saw her!"

"Karin," Kakashi said. "She visited here. Where was she headed?"

"Going the opposite direction than me. I had just escorted the Fi… oups, secret information… I think? What kind of security clearance do you have, Sensei?"

"One that's ten times higher than yours but nevermind," Kakashi sighed. "Where was she headed to?"

"The Land of Water, I'd say?"

"The Land of Water… hm. Was she alone?"

"No, two guys were with her, they looked like shinobi, but I'm not sure. What would she be doing there?"

"I have no idea," Kakashi mused with a glance towards Sarada who was still staring at Naruto with big eyes and seemed not to have made the link between 'red-headed weirdo who was so into Sasuke' and her mother. "But thanks. Very useful."

"Always glad to be of assistance!" Naruto beamed. Then, his attention shifted to Iruka and his face took on a mischievous air. "Have you been to see Ayame lately, Sensei?"

Iruka turned as red as an overripe tomato. "W… why… why would you say that?"

"Iruka likes ramen but he likes the one who serves him the ramen even more," Naruto remarked in Kakashi's direction with a giant grin. "Going right for the source! My sensei is an expert!"

"B...b...be quiet, Naruto," Iruka stammered, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but here.

Teuchi's daughter was a sweet, steady girl, and seemed like an excellent match for Iruka. Marvelling at how nature managed to bring couples together, Kakashi smiled at his extremely flustered junior.

"Sounds like a very auspicious pairing," he said encouragingly, holding up his thumb.

"Th… thanks," Iruka stammered, "but I don't think she is interested in me."

"Nonsense! Who else should she be into? You're the best!" Naruto boomed. "Where are you headed, my two Senseis? Care for some ramen? The little Miss looks hungry too."

"No, she needs to be brought back," Kakashi mumbled quickly. What time was it anyway? "But you go, Iruka."

"Y… you think so?" Iruka said, hope blossoming in his eyes. Ah, spring, Kakashi thought somewhat amused.

"Oh, sure," Kakashi said. "Go eat ramen with Naruto! See you tomorrow."

This was actually perfect. Now he would have time to talk to Sasuke alone and solve their issues. Or not.

"Almost there, Sarada," Kakashi said with a smile at the draggy feet and the snail pace of the little one. "You can soon rest at home."

"But I want to stay with you," Sarada piped as softly as a baby mouse.

Ha, words had come out of her mouth! An entire sentence even. That was great, only what she had said wasn't so much.

"Listen, Sarada," Kakashi said and bent down to look her in the eyes. "It's important that you understand something. You live here with Sasuke, who is your biological father."

"I don't understand that word."

Kakashi frowned. "It means he's your real father."

"He's not," Sarada pouted, her eyes filling up with tears quickly. "I want to stay with you and my momma."

"Ah," Kakashi sighed, "your mother is currently away and I can't take care of a child, I have to protect the village. I'm sorry."

"When is she coming back?" Sarada sobbed.

Kakashi's heart wanted to crumble, she looked so miserable and frightened.

"Soon, I hope," he said and put his hand on her head briefly to comfort her.

"Will you go get her? Like that other time?"

"What other time?"

"When you came and visited us."

"I'm afraid I don't remember that, Sarada," Kakashi said cautiously, "can you tell me more? When… how long ago was that?"

"I don't know," she continued sobbing.

Damn this, Kakashi thought, angry at himself. No wonder the child was attached to him if she knew him from before.

"I will go get her," he promised. "But Sasuke is still your father, Sarada."

"My father is dead," the girl shouted and ran away, her hands balled into angry fists.

Kakashi sighed heavily and walked after her. At least she was talking… or shouting, but this wasn't getting any easier.

The girl had run in the direction of the Tower, either by accident or deliberately, but soon, she stumbled and slowed down, looking lost and miserable standing in the middle of the street, staring up at the stone faces of the Hokages above them.

"Come," Kakashi said and took her hand. She didn't resist, but let her head hang in such a dejected manner, Kakashi almost turned around. But no, it was his duty to bring this child back to her father. Nodding to the Anbu guards, they went up to the apartment on the third floor.

"Here we go, Sarada. Let's knock."

There was no answer. Sasuke had to be back from physical therapy by now, Kakashi thought. Unless he had stayed at the hospital with Sakura? A thought he… didn't like. Not at all. Fool, he chided himself. Sasuke needs expert care right now and Sakura is not only his wife, she is also a doctor. It's only natural she would take good care of him.

"Hello?" Kakashi said and pressed down the door handle.

The door was unlocked and Kakashi cautiously poked his head in.

"Sasuke?" he asked, "are you in?"

There was a very small sound from the direction of the living room and Kakashi pushed open the door, signalling to Sarada to wait outside and be quiet.

"Sasuke?"

The Uchiha was sitting hunched over in his wheelchair, with his back to him. There was no sign of the nurse assigned to take care of him during the day. Maybe Sakura was here too? No, he would have felt her chakra signature. Sasuke was alone. And behaving strangely.

"Sasuke, I brought Sarada back from training," Kakashi said, stopping in the doorframe. Unease began to gather in the pit of his stomach. "Sasuke, we have to talk."

The Uchiha made a sound, something between a groan and a chuckle, a miserable, lost sound that went straight to Kakashi's heart.

"I…," he said, clearing his throat. "I… I hope we can work this out."

"Work this out," Sasuke whispered. "What is there to work out? You're a thief. You take what you want. Lives, Sharingans. Daughters. Wives. What do we do with thieves in Konoha? I should know, I'm the son of a policeman."

The energy in the room was wrong and it got wronger by the second. Sasuke was amassing chakra, no doubt about it. He might currently be in a wheelchair, but Kakashi hadn't lived to his age by misjudging his opponents. If Sasuke attacked him, he had to make sure Sarada was not in immediate danger.

Kakashi began to move towards the right as silently as possible. Which was pretty pointless considering he was up against an Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan with his bare fists. The best he could hope to do was talk his way out of this situation somehow… any fight would end very quickly. Not in his favor.

"I didn't take anything that wasn't offered," Kakashi said once he had moved far enough to be sure Sarada wouldn't be caught up in an attack by accident.

Again, the chuckle that sounded both insane and incredibly sad exploded from Sasuke's chest.

"When was it that you managed to fool yourself into believing you're a good guy?"

"I never said I'm a good guy," Kakashi answered quietly, "but I try to be. That is the difference right now. But you are better than this, Sasuke. Why do you not fight it? The darkness."

"I cannot stand your boring, repetitive lectures. The only difference between you and me is that you are lying to yourself and I am not. Though I was never quite sure you believe your own lies."

"I am sorry every day that you have to go through this, Sasuke. I am sorry the Uchihas still cannot be happy."

"You have no right! No right to what is rightfully mine as an Uchiha!"

"Correct, Sasuke. But you have no right to what you do not deserve."

Sasuke screamed like a wounded animal, turned his head - and Kakashi looked straight into his activated Mangekyo Sharingan.

Oh shit, was all Kakashi was able to think before he was plunged into the red hell of Tsukuyomi, the time-warp genjutsu that was worse than death…

… and came out a fraction of a second yet hours later, his body a pillar of pain, his head full of unbearable noise, his voice raw from screaming though he hadn't even used it. There were three things he noticed before sinking to his knees with a grunt. One, he had been able to escape the Tsukuyomi hell on his own, before the worst damage. Two, Sasuke's extremely surprised and shocked face. Three, Sarada standing between them, her eyes blazing red like the haze that was filling his own field of vision, her hands raised up, screaming "Stop! Stop! Stop! Don't hurt him!" from the top of her lungs.