Quick Author's Note: I have mentioned it before in a previous chapter, I am not going to be posting possible limes and lemons on this website anymore; they will be posted on AO3. I had another story with a lemon in it that was targetted by someone who was supposedly working with the admins. I can't believe I'm actually saying this . . . . but I'm sorry for the inconvenience. I really do apprecite the followers and comments on this story. You guys inspire me to write more. That's all I had to say. Thanks again for liking this story. Have a great day.

P.S. This chapter is a bit depressing. Just warning you.

Yesterday I had finally put my room back together after literally tearing everything apart in a fit of rage and anxiety. Minerva had told me that Harry had stayed with his godfather, the supposed murderer Siruis Black, for the holidays because he had a dream about Voldemort's damned snake attacking Arthur Weasley. I had known Arthur Weasley from my days of wandering around the Ministry looking for work. He had been kind to me; I think he was the one who talked to Dumbledore about hiring me as an assistant teacher.

When I had found out about Harry's dreams and his leaving Hogwarts, the safest place in the Isles, I had allowed my heritage to surface. Nothing in my quarters was left undamaged by my feriosity. I had denied Minerva access to my quarters due to everything being destroyed. I didn't want her worrying about my health or my heritage. My uncle was the only one I had allowed inside. He calmed me and helped me through my small period of rage, even though I could not tell him why I was furious in the first place.

". . . What's in the Department of Mysteries?"

"I only know that the people who work there are called the 'Unspeakables,' and no one really knows what happens back there."

I frowned as I looked up from my book about learning about Dark curses. It was late in the evening and I did not have any lessons to assist. I really did not expect the trio to show up in the library at a time like this because now was when Madam Pince would stalk the aisles and glare at the students. She had already been by me twice, and I grinned like a madman the second time, sending her off in a huff.

"Harry, are you sure you're all right?" Hermione sounded upset.

"I don't like Occlumency," Harry said in a voice that dripped with frustration and fatigue.

Harry was taking Occlumency lessons? From whom?

"Let's go to the common room."

I could hear the three getting up from their seats to leave, and I followed suit. Maybe I can get Harry alone for a moment to ask him about his new lessons. I stowed the book in my shoulder bag; I could feel Madam Pince's glare on my back, but I ignored her because I was not a student anymore, therefore she had no right to tell me off. I slid through the shelves and stacks of books on silent feet, managing to exit the library a few seconds before the three students.

"Oh! Talis, wait, please."

I paused, almost smirking with triumph. Turning on my heel, I spun to face the three. I had to bite back a growl when my eyes landed on my boyfriend. He was paler than the last time I had seen him, his scar standing out spectacularly against his skin. Bags darkened the underside of his tired green eyes. I wanted to scoop him into my arms and hold him until the pain and fatigue were gone.

"Talis, can we ask for a favor?"

I cocked my head a bit. "That depends on what it is, Miss Granger."

The bushy-haired girl shared a frustrated but amused look with Ron. Harry just seemed to be falling asleep where he was standing. Hermione motioned to a small alcove that was out of the way; I followed them to it, silenty reminding myself of its location. It could be a great spot to ambush Harry when he was least expecting it. "Could Harry stay with you for a while?" she asked quietly once we were tucked into the shadowy corner. "The common room will be noisy, and I don't believe it will be good for Harry to be in there right now." She glanced around before adding, "I know he would appreciate it."

"It's not very commom to ask a teacher's assistant such things," I said quietly. When she opened her mouth to speak again, I cut her off. "I can let him stay, Hermione. It's no problem." All three looked instantly relieved. I did not know how badly they needed Harry to have peace and quiet. "You two go ahead to the common room. I'll keep an eye on him."

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"It feels a bit different in here," Harry commented. He raised his head off my chest and glanced around. "What happened?" His green eyes stared into my acid ones, one eyebrow arched gracefully.

I sighed quietly. "I threw . . . a fit." My arm tightened around his shoulders. "I was frustrated and pissed off. I couldn't destroy anything outside my quarters." I kissed the top of his head. For the first time in a while my body relaxed fully. It was great being able to hold his smaller body against mine without having to worry about others walking in on us. "So how was your Christmas?"

He seemed to know I was changing the subject on purpose. His green eyes narrowed. "I'm not finished with you destroying your room," he grumbled. "My Christmas was not as great I had hoped."

"Want to talk about it?" I asked though I already knew parts of it.

Harry's nose scrunched a bit at the offer. His eyes shifted from one side to the other as if contemplating something. "I had to go to my godfather's for Christmas."

"That's where you were . . . No wonder I couldn't find you."

"Sorry about that. I couldn't send you a letter without others finding out about us." Harry took a deep breath as if he were about to spill a secret. "My godafther is . . . Sirius Black." He looked up at me shyly, probably thinking I was going to freak out. When I only raised my eyebrows he continued. "I had a dream the night I went to his home. I wa - saw a giant snake . . . attacking Arthur Weasley - you know who that is, right?"

I nodded, my hand gently stroking his side. "I believe he was the one who talked to Dumbledore about getting me a job here."

"Well . . . he was taken to the Wizarding hopital. He recovered quick enough. But then . . . " A sound that resembled a growl vibrated in his throat. "Snape told me I had to take Occlumency lessons with him. I have to lie to the others, tell them I'm taking remedial potions." I frowned at him. "These lessons are taking up time for D.A. lessons. The others are demanding to know when the next meeting is."

"They'll just have to wait," I said calmly. "It's not your fault Snape decided to be a dick." Harry snorted at my language. "As for your godfather, I do not believe he was a murderer." This time Harry arched his eyebrow. "Really?"

I nodded. "He seems like a nice man if he allowed you to go to his house for Christmas."

"He is great," Harry agreed.

"And I'm glad Arthur is feeling better. He's a great man. Funny. Very into the muggle stuff. I had a great conversation about video tapes with him not long before I was hired here. That was intersesting." I broke off my little speech when I noticed Harry was staring at me. "What's wrong, love?"

Harry cleared his throat and blinked. "You're taking this news very easily." There was suspicion in his maturing voice.

"Sweetheart, when you have witnessed and heard all that I have, you learn to just accept things without overly thinking about them." I leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "I do have one regret though."

"What?"

I sighed quietly. "I was not able to get you anything for Christmas." I looked away sadly. "I feel like a terrible partner."

A calloused hand gripped my chin gently. My head was turned to the side and tilted upward. I blinked at my boyfriend. "You didn't have to get me anything, Talis. You're a great partner," he added, gently kissing my mouth. "Being right here next to you, that's all I need."

A smile tugged at my mouth. "Come here, you." I settled back against the pillows. Harry returned my smile and resumed his spot on my chest, snuggling into my neck. I hummed contently. "I missed you, Harry."

I could feel his smile against my skin. "I missed you too."

A comforting silence filled the room around us. It was nice, peaceful even. I could hold Harry against me forever if time would allow me. The feel of his breath created goosebumps on my flesh. I shivered gently so I did not dislodge him. His fingers drew patterns on my stomach, dipping down toward the top of my jeans every now and then. My shirt was bunched up to my navel, and he took advantage of touching my exposed skin by dragging his blunt nails across my stomach.

"So . . . Why did you destory your room?"

I groaned, throwing my head back in defeat. What the hell was up with him and wondering what happened? I couldn't tell him about my heritage. It was too soon, and I doubted he would be able to handle the news. It was something big, though it happened in my grandmother's generation. Who knew something like that would affect her descendants? "I was pissed off because I had no clue where you were during Christmas. No one told me anything," I lied. "My emotions were shot, and everything internal just kind of collapsed. I had to go to Pomfrey for a healing potion because my hands were too damaged to hold a wand and heal myself."

"Did it have anything to do with your . . . heritage?"

"Yes," I said.

"Are you ever going to tell me about it?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "It's a lot to take in, and I don't want you to hate me."

Soft lips brushed against my skin. "I don't want you to hate me either."

"What do you mean?"

Harry went silent. He sat up, pulling out of my embrace, and scooted to the edge of the bed. I frowned at his back when he turned away from me. What was he hiding? Did something really bad happen? Did he regret giving up his virginity to me?

"Are you regretting having sex with a man for your first time?"

He shook his head, but still didn't look at me.

"Are you upset at me?"

Another shake.

I rolled onto my side and reached out to gently stroke his back. I felt him flinch under my touch. "Baby, please tell me."

"Chochangkissedme."

"Slower please. I didn't quite catch that."

Harry took a deep breath. "Cho Chang . . . She kissed me."

My hand stilled on his lower back. "What? When?"

"Before I had to leave for Sirius's, after the last D.A. meeting. You weren't there."

I knew I wasn't there. I was hanging out with Uncle Salo. "What happened?"

"I'm not sure. She was talking about Cedric. Then she pointed out that I was under a mistletoe." He shook his head as if clearing his thoughts. "She just came up and kissed me. I didn't know what to do. I . . . I kissed her back."

My heart plummeted into my stomach. "You did?"

"Yeah."

I returned to my previous position on my back. I coudn't think of anything to say to him. In the back of my mind, I knew something like this would happen. I had seen the way Cho had looked at Harry. She still couldn't come to terms over her feelings toward Harry. And, thanks to the law, Harry couldn't tell her he was in a relaitonship with another man, one who was legally an adult. I looked at him from the corner of my eye. For a fleeting moment his black hair was replaced with blonde. This was like Blue Jacobs all over again.

I shuffled to the edge of the bed and got to my feet. "I think it's time for you to go back to your dormitory, Mr. Potter." I felt his green eyes stare at me but didn't look his way. "Your friends will be worried that you were away for so long."

"Talis . . ."

"Please go, Harry." I opened my bedroom door. I could hear the she-wolf bark quietly from her portrait; I ignored her, instead focusing on the dragging footsteps behind me. "I told you that I do not want to be dragged around," I said quietly. "If you kissed her back, then you may have feelings for Miss Chang. I do not want to confuse your feelings." I stopped in front of the backside of my quarter's portrait. "I'm sorry if I have hurt you in any way." I pushed open the portrait. "Good night, Mr. Potter."

Harry stepped out of my quarters but turned to face me. I tried not to notice the tears that were forming in his beautiful green eyes. His shoulders were slumped a bit, and his face
was pale. I doubted I looked any better. "Talis, I'm sorry."

"It's Mr. Creary, Mr. Potter," I said quietly. "I am a teacher's assitant, nothing more. Please get to your dormitory before Snape shows up. He likes to make his rounds about this time." I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"I didn't mean for this." A tear fell from his eye. The left one. He was feeling pain. "I love you, Talis."

I sighed. "I love you too, Harry. That's why I have to let you go." I glanced up and down the hallway. "Go now. Snape will be by here any moment."

Harry opened his mouth, but must have decided not to talk. He turned on his heel and started down the hallway. He glanced back twice. I didn't call him back. I knew that was what he was waiting for.

Once he was out of sight, I backed into my quarters and shut the door. Reality slammed into me like a brick wall. My feet carried me to a small cabinet near the fireplace. My hands opened the doors and withdrew a bottle. Before I could blink I had the bottle against my lips and was gulping thickly. My throat was burnt by the heat of the liquid. A buzzing started in my head. I grew dizzy. I tried to plop down on my chair, but missed and ended up on the floor with a sore ass. Heavy tears slipped from my eyes. Drunken hiccups made my breathing unsteady.

My heart was broken.

Again.