Hi! Hope you like this one and leave your review, much love for each one of you. Please read my short note in the end, so you'll understand why I've been taking so long to write and publish new chapters.
: )
The ceremony has taken longer than Gabby expected, each person who had gotten a medal had two or three minutes to speak something to the audience. The fact she was sitting at first row wouldn't give her any chance to escape from the end of it or avoid to face Casey. What he'd been thinking when he decided to come here. He couldn't show up like that uninvited. Although she's known, some ceremonies are opened to other firefighters and she didn't have that power to prevent him to come. Matt was getting on her nerves. She rubbed her forehead and exhaled forcefully.
She couldn't resist and turned her head slightly to check if he was still there. From the corner of her eyes, she saw him there, unmoved, his face rigid. Probably, Brett hasn't known he had come she never would agree with that if she did she would tag along. She seemed ready to fight Gabby that day. The audacity of appearing at Boden's house showed to Gabby that Brett wouldn't give up her relationship with Matt so easily. Brett was determined as Gabby never had seen before.
Things are starting to make more sense... Brett's behavior at the firehouse, when Gabby had visited them the last time she was in Chicago... In the short time, they had talked Brett seemed nervous, she had been vague about what was going on on her life, she had already feelings for Matt... she barely looked straightly at Gabby for more than a few seconds.
Although Gabby wouldn't linger anymore about that issue, Matt and Brett were together, and Gabby had her friends. They have been so supportive of her, always checking on her, making her company, or texting her on daily bases, she couldn't ask for better friends.
"... I'd like to thank you, everyone, for coming and celebrate with us the incredible work done for our firefighters and paramedics...", the audience stood up and clapped for a few seconds. Chief Boden turned his body to Gabby and gave her a large smile, and she smiled back.
"You are ready?" he asked. She nodded stiffly. "Come on, your family is waiting for you", he turned around and Gabby followed his steps. On their way toward their friends, Boden was greeted by other co-workers and Gabby as well. Now and then she mustered up a smile, hiding her panic. Matt's presence had destabilized her. She was already on the edge.
For one second her eyes drifted to where the last time she had seen him, in the back of the auditory. He wasn't there, he might have left, she thought... It was for the best, she considered. Matt was forcing himself on her life, and it didn't feel right with her. He had made a decision and should stick with it until the end.
All the time she had been in Puerto Rico he never put much effort to visit her and now he felt a sudden urge to see her, talk to her, to make amends with her. She can't live like that, trying to figure out what he wants, when he wants it... who he wants. As long as he insisted on crossing her path... she won't live her life peacefully,
she admitted to herself. So she breathed a sigh of relief as she looked around and hadn't seen him anywhere.
"Hey, girl", Stella opened her arms and Gabby stepped into her embrace. "I'm so proud of you", she rubbed Gabby's back.
"Thank you," Gabby responded and pulled away slowly.
"Come here", Herrmann was the next on the line. "You made me tear up", then he stepped back after hugging her.
"Sorry," she smiled, "it wasn't my intention", she patted his shoulder.
When Severide put himself in front of her, she outstretched her hand. He narrowed his eyes, lifting his eyebrow.
"The last time you hugged me it took me seconds to catch my breath", she said seriously.
"You love my hugs. They are extra special for you", he chuckled.
"Babe, be nice, okay", Kidd squeezed his upper arm.
"Stella, hold you man," Gabby was pointing a finger at him,"... because if he-" he cut her off wrapping her in a big bear hug and kissing the right side of her hair.
"Noooo..." she murmured, they laughed at her expense.
"Don't worry, when I have him alone, I'll kick his ass", Stella patted his back a few times, then Severide unwrapped
his arms from Gabby.
"Thank you, guys, for coming. I love each one of you", she was happy for having great friends.
"We love you," Chief Boden, "... and I can say for each one of us that you are destined for something bigger, Gabriela Dawson... we are proud of you and feeling fortunate for taking part in your journey", he squeezed her forearm softly.
"Thanks, Chief", she gave him a side hug.
"So, I'm starving how about going to the restaurant...", Herrmann suggested, "Cindy will be there in a few minutes...", as glancing down to his watch.
"Donna is waiting for her ride," Boden announced. Cindy was going to pick Donna on her way to the restaurant, and they were going to meet there.
"Alright, let's go", Severide spoke. Stella wrapped an arm around his shoulder as they backed out of the room,
side by side. Herrmann and Boden quickly engaged in conversation as they were following the couple ahead. Gabby took the time to read a few text messages from her parents and her brother... walking absently while heading down the hall.
Her heart warmed as reading their words, she missed them deeply. Antonio was planning to visit her soon and his kids.
"Gabby...", he tried to get her attention again, "...Dawson", by the sound of her last name, her steps came to a halt... She didn't move, and she blinked her eyes rapidly.
"Gabby...can we talk?", she merely could hear him, she looked over her shoulder, her chest tightened.
Chief Boden looked back for no reason and saw Casey a few meters from him and Herrmann, Gabby between them. Herrmann stopped his steps and followed his gaze.
"I - I will see you guys at the restaurant", Gabby told them.
"Are you sure?", Herrmann noticed she was uncomfortable.
"Yeah, it won't take more than a few minutes", she gave him a weak smile.
"Okay, see you", Boden replied as he locked his eyes on Casey, then stared at Gabby.
When they were out of her sight, she turned around to look at Casey. Involuntarily, she braced herself as looking down at the ground.
He stepped forward keeping a short distance from her, "Congratulation?", he motioned toward her medal hanging on her neck.
"Thank you," she looked up at him.
"I imagine you weren't expecting me here", he was holding his hat with both hands.
"Not at all", she bit down on her bottom lip, "I- I don't understand why you keep insisting on it... You are with Brett, I said I'm okay with it, I don't want an explanation, I want nothing from you or her", she sounded more than a little irritated.
He shrugged out and tilted his head as running the tip of his tongue on his lower lip, "... I- I feel I lost you in some kind of way, and I can't really get my head wrapped around this", he shifted his weight on his feet.
She sucked in a deep breath, "Casey, you had me until you've chosen to-", she cut herself off.
"Gabby-", she made a signal for him to stop, "... despite everything that happened between-".
"Can you just stop!?", she interjected, "I don't want to hear it", she turned her back to him.
They stayed quiet for a moment. Gabby let her eyes fall closed as his eyebrows furrowed.
He refused to let things ended between them that way, "I'd like to have an honest conversation with you... I know I don't deserve it... Perhaps, it's the wrong time to do it, but I'm begging you... Gabby", his eyebrows raised expectantly.
"... My friends are waiting for me... I...", she knew she would regret it later. "I see you in a couple of hours, send me your address. I'll listen to you... After that, we move on with our lives."
Three hours later
As they walked out of the restaurant, Stella held Gabby's arm, calling her attention, "So, what the Chicago guy wanted?", Stella queried.
"Talking... have an honest conversation," Gabby mocked him. "While all I want is yelling at him", waving her hands around.
It caused Kidd to chuckle as folded her arms across her chest, "... Maybe he is becoming a Dawson guy again?", she grinned.
"Don't even think about it, please... I'm tired of all the drama. I won't drag you all back into this again, I refuse to do that," Gabby said shaking her head.
"Look...", Stella linked her arm with hers, "... We will always have your back. We won't judge you if you still love him, because I know you still love him...".
Gabby purposely kept her eyes focused down as they headed down to the parking lot.
"... Let him pour out his heart to you, but remember the final word is yours... Don't make a decision based on what we would think or others, it's your life, girl... You deserve being loved by someone with all his might if he is the one... you believe in it with all your heart, take it, if not, move on for the next chapter of your life".
Gabby leaned her head against Stella's shoulder, "... thank you, but I had a lot of time to think and I'm ready
to turn this page...", she stared at her friend, who seemed a little skeptical.
Stella lifted her hands in the air, "If you say so...".
"Trust me," Gabby sucked in a deep breath.
They said their goodbyes and Gabby got into her car and drove off.
"Take a seat, please...", Matt offered as Gabby was standing up, arms crossed.
"I'm okay", she said drily.
Then he sat down and watched her roam around his living room.
"It seems convenient that our old apartment had burned out after we got divorced," she stated sarcastically. "Don't you think?"
"I'd say that what is important hasn't gone away with the fire...".
She whipped her head around to gaze at him, "... they are here,", he pointed to his heart.
She scoffed, "Where were you when the fire started?" she turned her body to look him straight.
"I-I was sleeping...", his hands were clasped together.
"There was someone with you?" her arms fell to her side.
He didn't answer as he stared out into the empty.
Gabby watched him closely, "... It was Brett?", she narrowed her eyes at him.
"No, it was a reporter that I had helped with a case...", he looked up at her.
"I've never been wrong on my life when I said I had never known anyone as good as you, Matthew Casey,", he didn't miss her sarcastic tone as a smile formed over her lips.
"What happened between Brett and me... we were both hurts after you leaving-".
"So, I'm responsible for bringing you two together," she started pacing.
"We became good friends-", she cut in.
"I don't remember you two change more than a few words at the firehouse and when we were together... Suddenly as soon as I'm out of your sights you and Brett become confident because the evil Gabby, who hurt her best friend and abandoned her husband-", he interjected.
"Stop it, Gabby!", he shouted out as he got up.
"What is it, Matt? Is it not what happened? I'm wrong for stating it?" she asked angrily.
"We didn't plan to get this far in our relationship, for a long time we didn't feel comfortable knowing we would hurt you. It's why I never called you, I didn't know if it would last either..."
Gabby rolled her eyes, "I don't know what I'm doing here...", she turned her back to him.
"... She is a good girl, and I don't hurt her, but,... but..." he stuttered nervously. "I love you," he spoke, "I've never stopped loving you-",
"Why you didn't walk out through that door and take me back?", she turned to him. "I waited for you for days, weeks, months, then I gave up, I accepted that we were done..."
He saw tears in her eyes.
"Then, I came to Chicago to see you and that night I realized that I wanted our life back, I missed us... and I waited again for you...".
"I'm sorry for being that weak... for not being the husband that you deserved...", he blurted out.
Her upper lips have started to quiver, "... our time is over, I've come to realize that... maybe you may love me but is not in love with me, that's the reason you've never stepped out of your way, you haven't put your plans aside to go after me in Puerto Rico...", she eyes moved around the room as his eyes were stuck on her face.
"Nothing changes the fact that when you are around, I want to be with you", they locked eyes.
Silence fell over them, Casey felt that despite all the time had passed and all the hurt, Gabby had a place on his life that anyone would fill in.
Gabby began to walk toward the front door, "don't go", he told her.
He followed behind her. She reached for the doorknob as his hands rested on her waist.
"We can't do that...", she whispered.
"Don't go", he murmured as he kissed her hair.
"We can't..." she fought against her feelings. Her hand firmly holding the doorknob.
He kissed her head multiple times as wrapped his arms around her waist.
"No...", she said weakly as trying to step out of his embrace.
He kissed the side of her head as he cradled her jaw, turning her face up to his. He pressed a kiss on the corner of her mouth. Her face was wet.
"We can't...", she mumbled as her eyes fell to close. He brushed a light kiss against her mouth and turned her whole body to face his.
Her eyes roamed his face and stopped at his lips, "... Tomorrow we turn this page on our life, but today we gonna love each other one more time...".
She knew she would regret coming to his apartment.
Gabby nodded softly at him.
He cupped her face and sank his mouth into hers, deepening the kiss a low moan sounded in her throat.
Lifting her in his arms, she wrapped her arms and legs around him as he pressed her back against the door.
Matt wouldn't regret it later, he was a good man, though he wasn't perfect.
Note: I have two jobs and both are at Public Health Center, then you all can imagine how things have been right now. For weeks I have been feeling exhausted and don't feel up to write, so don't give up on my stories and me, please. I'll try my best to update my other stories and this one as well. Take care of yourself : )
Review, please!