Chapter 12 – Ricochet

Chuck was exhausted. He had flown nearly ten hours to Ibiza, and after having the jet quickly refueled, had flown another ten hours back. He had slept restlessly on the plane, torn between nightmares and a gnawing feeling in his gut. Chuck descended from the jet, once more powering on his phone. Shit, I should've called her back. Realizing his mistake, he promptly called her. After a few rings, he was greeted by her voicemail. "Blair, it's me. I'm sorry I missed your call… I was in the air. Running away again. But I came back. I'm messing up, too. And I'm sorry, too. Look, I'm on my way to you. I love you, Waldorf," he spoke earnestly.

Hanging up, he noticed he also had a voicemail from Lily. Chuck furrowed his brow and pressed the phone back to his ear. "Charles, call me back as soon as you get this. It's very important," she said breathlessly. She sounded nervous and tired, Chuck thought. He pressed 'call' without a second thought. Lily was the only mother he had ever known, and the most important woman in his life - after Blair.

"Charles?" she answered tenuously.

"Lily? Is everything ok? I just got your voicemail."

"Where are you, Charles?" Lily asked quietly.

"I just got off the jet. I'm in the car, going to Serena's. Why?" he asked, the gnawing feeling in his gut growing.

"Charles, I'm at Lennox Hill with Serena and Carter right now—"

Chuck interrupted her, "What? Where's Blair?" He already knew the answer, though.

"She's here, Charles. We've been here for a few hours now."

"Lily, what is going on? Why is she in the hospital? Is she alright?"

"She overdosed, Charles," Lily said quietly.

"What?" he spoke, but he didn't feel like the voice was coming from him. "I'm on my way," he continued, hanging up the phone without waiting for Lily's response.

"Arthur," he bit out. "Lennox Hill."

Arthur nodded at his employer through the rearview mirror, even though Chuck wasn't looking.

No, no, no, no, no. This couldn't be happening. Blair in the hospital again. He knew she had been self-medicating but he didn't know it was this bad…Unless. No. She wouldn't have tried to kill herself. She wouldn't have, he told himself, even though he was wondering if it was true, thinking of the sob he had heard in the voicemail that she had left him.

He wrestled with his thoughts all the way to the hospital, wondering if Blair had overdosed on accident or on purpose. Was she awake? Was she waiting for him? "Arthur, any way we could speed this up a bit?" he asked, thinking of Blair alone in the hospital, looking for him. Just the thought made him feel sick to his stomach.

"We're almost there, Mr. Bass," Arthur assured.

Chuck was gnawing the inside of his cheek as Arthur pulled up to Lennox Hill and he was out of the car before it even stopped fully. He paused at the entrance of the hospital, not even knowing where she was. He pulled out his phone and called Lily. "Lily, I'm here, where am I going?" he asked breathlessly.

"Fifth floor. I'll wait for you at the elevators."

Chuck hung up and quickly made his way into the hospital and to the nearest elevator. He slammed his palm against the button so hard that a few people turned to look at him, but he didn't care. He had to get to Blair. The elevator took too long, and Chuck fidgeted the entire time. Finally, the doors opened onto the fifth floor, revealing Lily, her face drawn and worn. She was dressed in loungewear and wore no makeup - she had hurried here, too, it seemed. "Where is she, Lily?" he asked immediately.

"She's alright, Charles," Lily assured him, taking his hands in her own.

"Just take me to her, Lily," he replied, trembling. Lily stared at her stepson for a long moment, and Chuck felt his impatience grow. "What, Lily?" he asked curtly.

"The doctors are wondering if she tried to kill herself, Charles. Serena told them she has no idea. Eleanor thinks she did. So, I need to ask you, Charles, what do you think?" she asked quietly.

"Eleanor?" he gaped. "Is she here?"

Lily nodded in confusion. "Of course, Charles. She's Blair's mother –"

"She can't be anywhere around Blair, Lily. I know you don't know what's going on right now, but that bitch can't be anywhere near Blair right now. And no, I don't think she tried to kill herself. I know her, Lily. I know her better than anyone. She'd fight. This was an accident, I'm almost positive." Almost.

Lily studied him for a moment before she nodded to him. "I'll do my best with Eleanor. And I'll make sure she doesn't go to Ostroff."

"Please, Lily."

"Follow me," she said quietly, practically dragging him down the hall. "What the hell is going on, Charles?" she asked as she walked quickly. "Serena is hiding something, and you're hiding something."

"Lily, I can't talk about it right now."

Lily stopped suddenly and spun around to face Chuck. "You are my son, Charles. But I also think of Blair as a daughter. And tonight, I found out she's been in the hospital twice in two months. What happened the first time, Charles? Why did no one call me?" she demanded.

"Louis was hitting her, Lily," he spoke lowly. "The only people who knew were me and Serena, and later Harold. Then she told Carter. He broke her fucking ribs, Lily."

Lily sucked in a breath. "Eleanor…"

"What?" Chuck demanded.

"She was about to call him when I came to meet you," Lily replied, her eyes frantic.

"Of course she was," he seethed. "Take me to her, please, Lily. I have to see her. Eleanor and Louis can't come anywhere near her."

Lily grabbed Chuck's hand once more and dragged him down the hall. Reaching the end of the hall, she opened a door and pushed him inside. Blair was in the bed, her dark hair still matted, her eyelids and lips a sickly shade of blue. She was paler than he had ever seen her and much too thin. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he stared at her.

"Chuck?" Serena's voice dragged him back to reality. She was sitting in the corner, holding Carter's hand. Her eyes were red and puffy from hours of crying.

He glanced at Serena before deciding to ignore her completely. He knelt beside Blair's bed and took her hand in his. "I'm here, baby," he whispered, rubbing her thumb gently with his own.

"Charles," Lily's voice echoed in the quiet room. "Tell them what you told me."

"She didn't try to kill herself," he spoke quietly. "It was an accident. I am almost positive."

"Almost, Chuck?" Serena sobbed.

"Well I can't be completely sure until I talk to her, sis. But I'll bet money that she didn't do it on purpose. What happened?" he asked quietly.

There was a long moment of silence and Chuck began to grow impatient waiting for an explanation.

It was Carter who finally broke the silence. "Serena went to check on her and she was barely breathing. I saw the pill bottle and I just knew, so I called 911." Carter stopped for a moment, exhaling deeply. "She stopped breathing before the ambulance got there. I gave her mouth-to-mouth. They pumped her stomach. And that's basically it, Bass." Carter refused to make eye contact with Chuck as he finished.

Chuck stared at Carter for a long moment. For years, he had hated this man with a fiery passion. He had saved her. He had saved Blair. Chuck now realized he owed everything to Carter Baizen.

"Eleanor can't be anywhere near her. Lily said she was calling Louis. That can't happen. I need them both away from here," he said, still looking at Carter.

"I can handle Louis, Bass," he said rising from his seat, thankful for the opportunity to get away from Blair's room. Carter had never seen Chuck look at him with appreciation before and it was making him anxious, and slightly nauseous.

"Carter?" Serena look up at him, her eyes wide.

"I've known him for a while, Serena. I've seen some pretty interesting things. I may or may not have pictures," he smirked.

"They better be good. He didn't give a fuck about pictures of him and his mistress," Chuck warned.

"I have it covered," Carter stated confidently, nodding to Chuck before hastily making his exit.

Oddly enough, Chuck believed him. "I'm starting to like your boyfriend, Sis." Serena sent him a disbelieving look and he merely shrugged. "At this point I'm indebted to him. I'm curious about those pictures, though."

"Eleanor?" Serena asked.

"She didn't tell you about what happened?" he replied.

Serena shook her head. "I'm assuming it was bad? The fact that she's calling Louis says all I need to know."

"You both need to start keeping me in the loop," Lily chastised, frustrated with both her daughter and stepson.

"Well you know the gist now, Lily," Chuck replied, his voice thick with irritation. "Can I please just have some time alone with her? Please?" he begged.

Serena glanced at her mother and gave her a small nod, indicating that they should leave.

The door clicked behind them and finally he was alone with Blair. "Hey, Waldorf, they're all gone. It's just us. You can wake up now," he said, forcing a small chuckle.

She grumbled, but didn't wake.

"Please wake up, Blair. I can't handle you in the hospital. Wake up and tell me you're ok. Please. Everyone thinks you tried to kill yourself. I don't think that - I think you made a mistake. I think you took too many on accident." Chuck felt tears building in his eyes, and the feeling was unfamiliar. He was Chuck Bass, and Chuck Bass didn't cry. "Wake up and tell me I'm right," he pleaded.

"It's too early, Chuck. What?" she finally murmured, still mostly asleep

It was night but he wasn't about to correct her. "I got your message, baby."

Her eyes opened slowly and she turned to face him, slowly becoming conscious again. "Why didn't you call me back?" she asked quietly.

"I did. You've been out for a few hours, Waldorf," he replied. I fucked up, he thought to himself.

"Where are we?" she whispered.

"The hospital."

"Why? I'm fine. My ribs are almost healed—"

"You overdosed, Blair. You almost died," Chuck replied, his voice breaking.

"What?"

"You weren't breathing," a small sob wrenched from his throat, against his volition.

"Chuck?"

"Did you try to kill yourself?" he asked quietly. He felt the tears still welling in his eyes, and forced himself to hold them back. He knew that she saw though. She always saw.

"What?" she whispered back.

"Blair. Did you try to kill yourself? Please tell me the truth," Chuck begged.

"I didn't try to kill myself, Chuck," she whispered.

"Then why, Blair?" he returned quietly.

"I felt a panic attack coming. It was going to be bad. So, I just took some…I don't know how many," she offered lamely.

Chuck merely nodded and grabbed her hand, planting kisses into her palm and into her wrist. "This has to stop, Blair," he murmured.

"I know, Chuck. I don't know what's wrong with me. My brain is a mess," she admitted quietly.

"Talk to me, Waldorf." Blair gave him a sad smile and moved towards the left side of her bed and patted the empty side of the bed, indcating for Chuck to join her. He instantly obliged, pulling her into his arms. "Talk to me, Waldorf," he requested again, having settled in next to her.

"I don't know," she started slowly. "I don't feel safe. I'm afraid all the time. I just feel like…," she trailed off.

"Like?"

"I'm just waiting for something bad to happen all the time. I'm tired all the time. I just want to sleep, and forget. And I'm sad, Chuck, and I don't even know why," she continued in a whisper, tears filling her eyes at her revelation. "You're the only thing that makes me feel even close to normal."

He squeezed her gently in his arms. "You're depressed, Blair," he said, pressing a kiss into her hair.

"Excuse me?" she scoffed, pulling away from him slightly. "Me? Depressed? I'm Blair Waldorf."

"Indeed you are—"

"Blair Waldorf does not get depressed," she interrupted.

"Waldorf, that's not exactly how it works."

"I'm honestly offended at the suggestion, Chuck," she replied, turning away from him.

"Blair -"

"No! I'm not depressed!" she exclaimed.

Chuck ignored her frustration and pulled her back into him. "It's not something to be ashamed of, Blair."

"What? So I can add it to my mental health resume? Bulimic? Check. Panic attacks? Check. Depression? No thanks," she scoffed.

"Ok, Blair." He was fighting a losing battle and he knew it. "I've never judged you for anything and I wouldn't for that either," he stated, rubbing small circles in her back.

He could tell she was falling back asleep by the slowing of her breathing, which he listened to, enraptured. That breathing had stopped earlier that day, and he had to listen, had to memorize it like a favorite melody. It was one of the most beautiful things he had ever heard. The melody of her breathing was lulling him off to sleep, too, until Carter entered the door and slipped inside.

Chuck had been on high-alert for too many weeks and feeling a presence enter the room his eyes immediately snapped open. Seeing it was Carter, his body relaxed slightly. Chuck gently disentangled himself from Blair and walked towards the door. "What is it, Baizen?" he hissed.

"Slight bump in the road, Bass," Carter returned, seriously, opening the door and motioning for Chuck to follow him.

"How large of a bump, Baizen? I thought you said you had things covered."

"Yeah, I thought I did. Louis doesn't fucking care about what we have on him. He's sociopathic. And Eleanor is smitten," Carter responded, gravely.

"He's here?"

"I'm bribing the whole nursing staff right now. He and Eleanor can't see Blair because she's having a 'procedure' right now. You've got an hour."

"Bribing? With what money?"

"Yours, of course." Carter smirked.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do? Kidnap her?" Chuck seethed, before a realization dawned on him. "Baizen, what exactly do you have on Louis?" he asked slowly.

Carter pulled his phone out of his pocket and scrolled a bit before handing over the phone to Chuck.

Chuck took in the image in front of him. It was depraved, that was for certain. The room was dark, and full of scantily-clad women - many of whom were clearly prostitutes. In the middle of the frame, one of the girls was reclined back on a table, dressed only in a bra and panties. Next to her was Louis, kneeling over her, snorting a white substance off of her abdomen. "Seriously?" Chuck asked.

Carter shrugged, before taking his phone back. "I've got a few more, mostly in that same vain. That one's my favorite," he said with a smirk.

Chuck smirked back. "Send it. To Gossip Girl, Page Six. Just send it," he said, pulling out his own phone to look for the pictures he had taken of Louis and Estee. In truth, he had forgotten about them after the incident between him and Louis during Blair's first hospital trip.

Carter's brow furrowed in confusion. "Why, Bass? I just told you he doesn't care. What's the angle?"

"Come on, Baizen. You're not an idiot. Sure, he says he doesn't care. But we're going to call his bluff."

Carter's eyes lit up with realization. "What have you got, Bass?"

"Just pictures of him with his mistress. Oh, and he was recently arrested. But can you imagine the Gossip Girl blast and the royal fallout? There's no way he'll ascend the throne after all of this comes to light. Everyone will know the prince is merely a toad," Chuck answered, feeling excitement bloom in his stomach - a good scheme always excited him.

"Total destruction," Carter affirmed, quickly sending the incriminating photos to Gossip Girl. She could take if from here.

Xoxo.

Far away in Brooklyn, Dan Humphrey was lounging on the couch in his living, feet propped up on the coffee table in front of him as he reread A Confederacy of Dunces for the fourth time. It had been a busy week for him, and he was relieved to have a lazy day all to himself.

It was then that he heard the distinct ping from the phone in his bedroom, indicating a text. He was resolved to ignore it, just for a little bit, at least - until he heard several more pings all in quick succession. He sighed, placing his novel down on the couch and uncrossing his feet from the coffee table, dropping them to the floor. There was no rest for the wicked, after all.

Dan made his way to his bedroom and located his burner phone, complete with several messages from Carter Baizen and Chuck Bass. Well, this should be good.

He unlocked his phone and his jaw dropped. Several pictures of Louis Grimaldi, Prince of Monaco snorting cocaine off a scantily-clad prostitute, Louis Grimaldi very clearly having an affair, Louis Grimaldi's mugshot. It was absolutely Gossip Girl gold.

Grinning, Dan sat down and began to type out what was sure to be a historic Gossip Girl blast.

Hey, all you Upper East Siders. Prince of Monaco or the Prince of the Depraved? I'll let you decide – after all, a picture speaks a thousand words. And I have several. Is that L snorting cocaine off a prostitute? Is that L with a mistress? Sure looks that way to me. At least he looks handsome in his mugshot. Oh, L, what did you do? Looks like L might be falling from grace – or at least off his golden throne. And where is our Queen B? A penny for your thoughts, B.

You know you love me, xoxo.

Satisfied, Dan hit send.

Xoxo.

Fifteen more minutes, that's all he had. Come on, Gossip Girl. As if on cue, his phone vibrated in his pocket, and sure enough it was Gossip Girl. Chuck smirked at the blast. Louis' depravity was all out in the open now, and Chuck was sure the prince would be completely ruined.

"I know that face. That face means your plan is falling into place. What are you up to, Bass?" Blair asked quietly.

He was back in Blair's room, lounging in an uncomfortable chair right next to her bed. It was becoming too familiar.

"Nothing you have to concern yourself with, Waldorf," he replied absently.

"Chuck?" she asked quietly, tentatively.

"Yes?"

"You said you called me back?"

"Of course I did. Did you really think I wouldn't?"

"You didn't answer," she returned, averting her eyes.

"My phone was off. I would've answered, Blair," he assured.

"I thought…" she trailed off, fighting back the urge to cry.

"You thought what?" he asked softly.

"That you were done. With me." Color rushed into her cheeks at her admission.

He looked at her for a long moment, his eyes boring into hers. "Blair, I –"

Chuck was interrupted by a clamor in the hallway. Heavy footsteps, raised voices – and it was getting closer. Chuck's stomach dropped as he realized what was happening.

"Chuck?" Blair asked, confused and concerned.

He didn't have a chance to answer as Louis, barreled into the room and made a beeline for Chuck. "Do you know what you just did?" he roared.

Chuck rose slowly, making sure to button his suit as he stood. "I know exactly what I did, Louis. The question is, what exactly are you doing here?" he spoke calmly.

"I was here to see Blair, until I saw the disgusting Gossip Girl blast. Such trash," Louis spat.

Chuck glanced towards Blair, who had backed herself into the farthest corner of her bed, her covers wrapped around her. He could see her shaking from where he stood. "Let's talk outside, Louis." He had to protect her.

Louis looked over his shoulder at Blair and smiled. "I think here is just fine."

Chuck was watching Blair and didn't see the fist coming towards him until it had almost connected with his face. In an instant, had Louis punched him in the face and he heard Blair yelp. "You just destroyed my life," Louis said coldly.

Despite the blow, Chuck smirked. "Good."

Louis punched him again. "Bastard."

"Stop it!" Blair was out of bed and pounding furiously at Louis with her tiny fists. "Stop!" she cried.

Chuck watched in horror as Louis turned around and slapped her across the face. Blair backed away slowly, her eyes wide and distant. In that moment, something inside Chuck snapped. No one touched Blair, especially not like that. Louis was pushed up against the wall before Chuck even knew what he was doing. "How dare you?" he whispered coldly. "How dare you touch her like that?" Chuck grabbed the collar of Louis' shirt and slammed him against the wall, harder. "You piece of garbage," he seethed.

"Chuck, stop," Blair pleaded, tears streaming down her face.

Chuck's eyes rose to meet hers. At the sight of her distressed, he backed away from Louis. "Leave New York, Louis, or I will actually kill you," he said coldly. "Take your mistress and go."

"And what of Blair?" Louis asked.

"She is no longer any of your business," Chuck rasped.

Louis smirked. "I'm a prince. And you? New money?"

"Get the fuck out, Louis," Chuck bit out.

Louis smirked at Chuck once again, before shooting Blair a smile. He wasn't letting her go that easily. "I'll see you both later," he said, smiling devilishly.

As soon Louis was gone, Chuck was at her side. "Are you ok?" he asked quietly.

She touched her cheek, and felt that it was slightly hot and swollen under her hand. "I'm ok," she said absently.

"Waldorf, look at me."

She forced herself to look up at him, and noticed the bright purple bruise blooming on the right side of his face. Her fingers went to it immediately, wanting to sooth him. "Are you ok?" she asked instead.

Chuck simply shook his head and pressed his face into her hand, relishing the feeling of her fingers against his skin. She understood instantly and stroked his jawbone soothingly, tracing light patterns across the plane of his cheekbone. He relaxed into her touch.

"You're exhausted," she whispered

He wanted to deny it. He was fine, really. But he didn't have the energy to fight her. Instead, he simply nodded. "I am," he replied quietly.

"Blair! Blair Cornelia Waldorf!" Eleanor's voice pierced their reverie.

Blair jumped and Chuck forced his eyes open. He was on high-alert once more.

"What is going on, Blair?" Eleanor asked impatiently, her eyes hard and cold. She took in the sight of Chuck and Blair before her and added, "And what is the meaning of this?"

Chuck glared at Eleanor before rising to stand. "I think you should leave, Eleanor."

Eleanor scoffed. "No, my daughter owes me an explanation."

Chuck clenched his fists. "Eleanor –" he began.

Blair interrupted him immediately. "Chuck, don't," she said, grabbing his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. "I have already given you an explanation, Mother. Just because you don't accept it doesn't mean I didn't try to explain it."

"Blair Cornelia –" Eleanor began to chastise her again.

Blair turned her head away from her mother. "You should leave, Mother. I'm done arguing with you about this. Louis hit me. I'm done. With him, and with you."

Chuck could barely believe what he was hearing. Blair sticking up to her mother was unheard of.

"Blair!"

"No!" Blair shouted, squeezing Chuck's hand so hard it hurt. "I have done everything to make you happy and I am still not good enough. Leave, Eleanor. We're done here." Blair dismissed her with a wave of her hand.

Eleanor's jaw tightened. "I am your mother, Blair," she replied, warning in her voice.

"Oh, yeah? Maybe you should have acted like one. You're still not acting like one. He hit me and you're mad at me?"

"I just want what's best for –"

"Don't even complete that sentence, Eleanor," Blair bit out. "Leave, now. Chuck?" She looked up at Chuck for reassurance.

Chuck nodded. "I think it would be best if you left, Eleanor."

"How dare you?" Eleanor seethed. "Who do you think you are?"

"I'm Chuck Bass. And unlike you, I have your daughter's best interests at heart. Leave. You aren't welcome here," Chuck replied coolly.

Eleanor furrowed her brow at both Chuck and Blair. "You're marrying Louis, dear," she replied coldly, with a pointed look at Blair, before turning around and leaving the room.

The room was quiet for a few minutes before Blair whispered, "She doesn't even care about me."

"You won't marry him, will you?" he asked quietly, after a few moments.

"What?" she asked incredulously.

"Your mother's approval…I know how much it means. You'd do anything for her approval." Chuck paused a moment before continuing more quietly, "Does that include marrying him?"

"Even if intended to, would you let me?" she asked, with a chuckle.

"I'm not joking," he replied, trying to keep his voice even.

"I…I don't think I could have married him," she said quietly.

Chuck felt himself relax at her words and lowered himself back down onto the bed next her. "No?" he asked as he settled back against her, hoping she would elaborate.

"The past couple of months…It's like I was a zombie. I was living automatically. I did the parties, and the galas, and the social calls, and the wedding planning. It was all planned, Chuck, every last detail. I made sure everything would be perfect. But I think…once I put on that dress, and I was about to walk down that aisle…I think I would see who was standing there and I think I would have panicked. I don't think I would be able to go through with it – then or now," she reasoned. "I didn't love him, Chuck. Not anymore. I think I did once, but I stopped a while ago. I don't know when."

"I probably would have crashed anyways, Waldorf," Chuck replied with a small smile.

Blair snuggled into Chuck's side. "Thanks, Bass," she murmured.

"For what?" he asked, pulling her into him, relishing the feeling of her lithe body against him.

"For saving me before it came to that. I mean, could you imagine how disappointed my mother would have been with me?" she let out a sardonic chuckle.

"Why do care so much what she thinks?" Chuck seethed in a voice louder than he intended.

"She's my mother, Chuck. I want to her to be happy," she replied quietly.

Chuck took her chin between his thumb and forefinger and gently forced her to look at him. "And I want you to be happy. Fuck what Eleanor wants."

Blair looked away from him, but nodded slightly before settling her head back onto his shoulder. They laid like that for a few minutes in comfortable silence before Blair spoke again, "Can I go home, Chuck?"

"Lily's working on it right now, Waldorf. We'll break you out of here soon, I promise," Chuck replied, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Where is home?" he added after a moment.

"With you," she replied, hesitantly. "If you'll have me." Her voice trembled with nerves as she spoke.

"You know how I suggested you look for an apartment of your own?" he replied.

"Oh. Yes," she replied quietly. He kicked you out, remember? "Of course."

"I don't think you should do that anymore."

"W-what?" she asked.

"I think you should move in with me," he replied soundly.

"Chuck?" she questioned.

"If you want to, that is," he replied, hesitating.

She couldn't help but smile. "Really?"

"Yes, really. What do you say, Waldorf? Want to be my roommate?" he replied with a smirk.

"Roommate?" she chuckled. "Sure, I'll be your roommate, Bass. But you can't have girls over."

Chuck smirked at her. "Why would I need girls over when I have you as a roommate?"

"I'm serious, Chuck," she said quietly.

"Yeah, so am I," he answered right back.

Blair smiled despite herself and burrowed herself against him, ready for sleep. "I love you, Chuck."

"I love you, too, Blair."

Xoxo.

The dress fit her like a glove. She knew she looked beautiful – everyone had told her so. It was a custom-made Vera Wang, and it was extraordinary, but it felt much too tight. "Serena," she gasped, beckoning for her best friend.

"B, what's wrong?" Serena asked, noticing the strange expression on her best friend's face.

"Nothing," Blair replied tightly.

"You're thinking about Chuck, aren't you?"

Blair whirled around to face Serena. "Why would I be thinking about Chuck right now, Serena?"

"You don't love Louis, Blair. Everyone can see it. You love Chuck."

"No, I love Louis!" Blair responded. Her voice sounded forced and she knew it.

Serena studied Blair for a few moments. "Is this what you really want, B? Because I am totally prepared to make a run with you."

Blair forced herself to smile. She was happy. She loved Louis. Her mother approved of her. "Serena, will you tell everyone that I'm ready to begin? Of course it is, S," Blair responded cheerily.

Serena looked at Blair skeptically, but she knew there was no point in trying to change her best friend's mind. If Blair was decided, there was nothing she could do. She knew her best friend was making a mistake, but there was nothing she could do to stop it. "I'll let everyone know we can begin," Serena said tightly. Mistake, mistake, mistake.

"Thank you, Serena," Blair replied, tightly.

Her father was on her right arm, Cyrus was on her left. She heard the wedding march, but her feet were frozen. She couldn't move. She looked up at her groom and she panicked when she realized the face was all wrong.

She couldn't marry Louis. No, no, no.

She didn't protest as Harold and Cyrus led her down the aisle. Her legs moved automatically. She could see Louis smile at her from the altar. The smile was wrong. The form was wrong. It wasn't Chuck. She was supposed to marry Chuck, not Louis.

Somehow her legs carried her up the stairs, and she stood before Louis, who bore a wide grin. Everyone was watching her, waiting, judging. Why had she decided to go through with this? Serena was right – she didn't love Louis, she loved Chuck. So why was she in the big white dress in front of all these people?

Blair didn't know the answer. The world lurched and she was on her knees, struggling to breathe. She looked around for help, but all she saw were the fake smiles plastered to the faces of the people who supposedly cared about her, mocking her. She couldn't do this. She couldn't marry him. Why didn't anyone see? She started to cry, but they all just continued to stare at her, waiting.

Where was Chuck? He would save her.

"Blair Cornelia Waldorf," Eleanor hissed from her seat, loud enough for the first few rows could hear her. "Get off your knees and marry him."

Blair listened to her mother, rising to from the ground. She felt unsteady, dizzy. I can't do this. No. You have to.

She looked to the nave of the church, fully expecting Chuck to be waiting. He would stop this. He wouldn't let her marry anyone else, she knew that for certain.

Where was he?

"I now pronounce you man and wife."

Wait, she hadn't even said 'I do.' She hadn't agreed to this. No, no, no.

"No!" She shot up in bed, breathing hard, covered in sweat.

It was just a dream, Blair. Get ahold of yourself. She felt her breathing return to normal and she wiped the droplets of sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand, looking down at the sleeping form next to her on the bed with a small smile. She was sure overnight visits were frowned upon by the hospital, but he was Chuck Bass, and he did what he wanted.

She watched as he snored lightly, completely unaware that she was even awake. She was transfixed on his face, his lips parted slightly, and she felt a pang of guilt as she saw the bruise on his face had fully fleshed out, bright purple and angry. He looked paler than usual, and his face looked worn, drawn, with dark half-moon crescents underneath his eyes.

This has to stop, Blair.

That night had been a wake-up call for Blair. The images of tears welling in Chuck's eyes, Louis hitting Chuck, Chuck slamming Louis up against the wall, crazed, were seared into her brain. It was all her fault. Chuck had been right, of course – She was destroying herself. What he hadn't said, however, was that she was also destroying him in the process.

This has to stop, Blair.

It would stop. It had to. She had to get better, had to be better, for him. Blair reached out and gently touched his shoulder. "I promise, it will."