Drunk In Love

Summary: At a drunken sleepover, the Glee guys measure themselves up against each other. Not everyone is too happy with the results. Impulsivity plus alcohol leads to a very good time.

Rated: M

Warnings: Mentions of sexual activity both heterosexual and homosexual. Depictions of nudity. Swearing. Graphic sexual content. Orgy.

AU: Season 1 where Sam is present. Everyone is single, so it disregards all Season 1 ships except for Artie/Tina! Meaning that Finn does not have a problem with Jesse. Kurt does not have a crush on Finn.

Characters: Finn Hudson, Jesse St. James, Kurt Hummel, Matt Rutherford, Mike Chang, Noah Puckerman, Sam Evans

"Whose idea was this sleepover again?" Puck asks as he dumps his sleeping bag in the Evans' living room, Finn following.

"Kurt's, I think," Sam replied as he ensured that everybody would have a place to sleep.

"Of course it was," Puck drawled.

Kurt strolled out of the kitchen indignantly, carrying a tray filled with assortments of snacks that he had prepared in advance. It certainly was not so that he could spent some more time with Sam, no way. He wanted the night to be fun and filling. "I did not suggest this gathering for reasons that you believe, Puck. I simply noticed that us Glee guys haven't…bonded as closely as the girls have. I think it could help us at Regionals if we're more of a team."

Jesse nodded. "Kurt's right. Everyone at Vocal Adrenaline was cohesive. We're not. And it'll be fun to not have the girls around."

Matt sighed. "Everybody thinks I'm mute. It's just that Rachel never lets me speak long enough for it to be considered a sentence. I'm actually quite talkative."

Mike walked back and smacked his head. "Too talkative."

Finn smiled. "What time is Artie getting here?"

"Oh, Tina said that she had already claimed him for tonight. She was wearing her vampire ensemble. Have you tried arguing with her?" Sam shook his head largely.

"I do not want to know what she means by claimed," Matt shuddered.

The guys chuckled as everything was set up. Kurt pointed to the tray.

"So, the dips for the Doritos are aligned specifically. Please do not double-dip, it drives my brain crazy. If you want a certain dip, eat a certain flavour."

Puck rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Hummel. I brought as much booze as I could fit in my truck and Finn brought all his Xbox games. Don't plan on sleeping."

"Yet you brought a sleeping bag," Kurt pointed out. Puck threw a Dorito at him. "Puckerman, this shirt is Ralph Lauren, now why would you do that?"

Puck shrugged. "You were being a dork."

"I loathe you," Kurt snorted.

"You love me, Hummel. I'm great to look at and I'm a badass."

Kurt said nothing, simply because he hadn't heard Puck's retort. He was too busy clearing the surrounding area of Dorito dust. Puck noticed his silence.

While they had been bickering, Finn brought in all three cases of alcohol. Sam had already provided a few more courtesy of Dwight and Mary Evans, who had been more than okay with the boys drinking.

At the appearance of the spirits, Sam declared that everybody was doing a Vodka shot to kick things off. Once the glasses were poured, the guys clinked together in the middle of their impromptu circle and downed their shots. Finn, Jesse and Mike winced, but the rest of the guys took their shots bravely. Puck had been surprised that Kurt could handle his alcohol.

"Hummel, you aren't spluttering around like a girl who wasn't prepared to swallow. What's the matter with that? You can actually handle alcohol?"

Kurt wrinkled his nose. "As appalling as that simile was, Puck, I'm not very tolerant with copious amounts of alcohol. I happen to enjoy the taste of vodka. Plus, I enjoy laughing at the weaker members of the human race who cannot handle it," Kurt laughed, eyeing Mike in particular who was still feeling the effects of the shot.

Puck had set up multiplayer rounds of some shooter game that Kurt had no idea about. His head was already beginning to throb weakly but he passed it off as nausea at the violence of the game. It was Mike who had suggested that they play Halo next. Kurt looked up, trying to keep his face nonchalant.

"Okay, I've got a suggestion," Matt announced. Everybody listened. Because when the mute boy speaks, you have to listen. Or at least that was what Puck's philosophy was. "We'll each challenge each other on Halo. Loser takes a shot. Winner stays on until they lose. It'll get us drunk quicker."

Everybody nodded, Finn looking pre-emptively smug. Kurt hid a smirk at how proficient he actually was at Halo. Nobody knew, not even Mercedes.

Mike sighed as he lost narrowly to Jesse as the Asian boy downed his second shot. Mike could hold his alcohol, but detested vodka. Jesse succumbed to Puck, who grinned as the curly-haired boy coughed repeatedly.

"Your turn, Hummel," Puck challenged. "Ready to take another shot?"

Kurt smirked. "I hope you are." He grabbed the controller as Puck started the round. The alcohol was affecting his gameplay only marginally, so Kurt had adept control of his character after vocally criticising the avatar's fashion choices. Matt laughed and agreed with him as Kurt's character launched Puck's into the air, killing him instantly. "The joke's on you, Puckerman. That'll be a shot."

Puck cursed. "When the fuck did you learn how to play Halo, Lance Bass?"

Kurt shrugged. "Inherent video game skills?"

Puck gave him the finger as he took his shot, only showing small signs of intolerance.

The night proceeded that way, filled with banter and video games and shots, until none of them could actually see straight enough to play the game anymore. Sam shut down the console and moved the table of drinks and snacks to the other end of the spacious living room. Everyone was sat on the floor, swaying slightly from inebriation. Kurt, through no conscious action of his own, fell into Matt's lap.

"Hello, Matthew," Kurt slurred. Matt grinned down at the boy below him.

"Comfy down there, Kurt?"

"Oh, you have no idea," Kurt proceeded to giggle and caught the attention of the other boys.

"Hummel's right where he belongs," Puck said unevenly. "On top of a dick."

Laughs echoed around the room until Kurt sat up, steadying himself on Matt's shoulder.

"Do you think a lot about me on a dick, Puckerman?"

Catcalls erupted from all around the room. Puck looked playfully furious.

"About as often as you think about me fucking a girl."

Kurt shrugged. "Fair play to that."

Jesse leaned forward, rocking on his elbows. "So, I have a question. I haven't been at McKinley for very long but already I've heard rumours about Puckerman's sexual prowess."

Puck smirked at the mention of the word 'sex' in a conversation and Kurt and Finn rolled their eyes. "All good things, I'm sure."

Jesse shrugged. "Mostly. I'm just wondering if they're true."

Sam coughed on his beer and Kurt tutted at him after warning him not to mix his drinks. Even though Kurt had won most of the Halo games, only being bested by Mike after Sam had tickled him until he submitted, the guys had forced shots down his throat and Kurt had happily accepted them.

Puck grinned cheekily. "Of course they are. Go on, run 'em by me."

Jesse cocked his head but nodded, preferring to keep his head still as to not get nauseous. "So is it really comparable to an actual python?"

Finn scratched his head. Jesse used a lot of big words for a drunk guy. He thought Kurt and Jesse were quite similar, actually.

Puck smirked again and Kurt really wished that he would stop doing that, mostly because it was outrageously attractive and Kurt was not in a position to be controlling his urges, now was he? "You wouldn't believe it if I told you."

"Probably not," Jesse countered.

Puck got an idea to prove how he could re-establish his manhood. "I could always…show you."

At that precise moment, the seven boys looked at each other tensely, wondering if the drunken sexual urges that they were having were shared with the others. Somehow, they were all single, drunk and extremely horny. What was a little fun between guys? To Kurt, it was more than his wildest wet dreams. To Puck, it was affirming his masculinity through wanton sex with his friends.

"Unless you couldn't handle what was underneath?" Puck finished, looking firmly at Kurt. "You up for this, Hummel?"

Kurt cocked an eyebrow. "I'm game. I've already seen what's going on down there."

"Fair enough. But you've never seen it hard."

Kurt's mind flipped over even more than the alcohol had already caused it to. Was Puck really suggesting what Kurt thought he was suggesting.

Puck sighed. "But…if I'm getting mine out, everybody else has to. Come on, we're all guys. I just don't want to feel too gay while I'm doing it."

Mike snorted loudly. "But staring at six other hard dicks will make it less gay?"

Puck shrugged. "Yeah." Puck was too drunk to really think about what he was saying.

If you asked them all while they were sober, none of them could have told you why they did it. But as they all unzipped their pants and pulled down their underwear, all doubts were forgotten as a large haze of lust washed over them.

Jesse had an idea. "Since we're in a circle and we're all trying to get hard, turn to the person on your right and get to work."

The guys agreed.

Jesse looked to his right and saw Finn biting his lip.

Finn looked to his right and saw Mike looking ready for anything.

Mike looked to his right and saw Sam, already stroking himself.

Sam looked to his right and saw Matt, who had a blush on his cheeks.

Matt looked to his right and saw Kurt, who wasn't looking his way at all.

Kurt looked to his right and saw the infamous Puckerman cock in all its glory.

Puck looked to his left and smirked. "Looks like the honour is all yours, Princess. Let's go, boys. Remember, nobody is getting off yet. Just get hard."

Puck grabbed Jesse's dick and the pleasure began sevenfold.

The earliest moans could be heard from Matt, who had the pleasure of finding out exactly what Sam's wide mouth was good for. The blonde boy licked and sucked at the large dick in front of him with no restraint, as if forgetting that Mike was also deep throating his own impressively sized penis.

"Don't be shy, Kurt," Puck looked back and winked. "Puckzilla won't bite you."

Kurt had no doubts about that, but wondered if his large mouth would even fit around Puck's monster. Instead, he used his tongue to lick from the base to the tip in one fluid motion. Puck moaned around Jesse's cock and the chain began. The vibrations that ripped up Finn's spine were transferred to the pleasure Mike was receiving and, suddenly, the chain ended at Kurt, who now had his mouth around Puck completely, trying his best to get as much in as he possibly could. He figured that he could do it, but the angle didn't seem to quite right. He didn't have much room to move as Matt's mouth was clamped around his own member. Matt had switched to his balls a few times, a surprise that Kurt was by all means enjoying.

Once the person to their right was sufficiently erect, the boys left their cocks with only a few strokes to satisfy them. Sam was finished first, his talented mouth rendering Matt as hard as marble. Jesse was finished last, though he was probably taking the time to enjoy having Finn's thick dick in his mouth.

Mike, with his hand around his cock, clucked. "Uh…what do we do now?"

Finn looked at him questioningly. "Measure?"

"That's a good plan to me," Sam murmured as did Matt and Puck.

Kurt, however, was taking the time to enjoy the sights around him. Each boy had a cock to admire and Kurt wanted to try them all.

The boys stumbled into a line and removed their fists from their members, looking up and down the line to compare.

"Well, it's clear that I'm the biggest," Puck bragged, shaking his hips gloatingly.

Kurt put a hand on his chest. "Not so fast, Nacho Vidal. I think you're discounting Samuel Evans over there. Not only is it thicker, but I think it's longer. Mike, good job with that," the pale boy commended.

Puck shook his head and walked over to Sam, grabbing both of their dicks in his fist. Dissatisfied with his findings, Puck growled.

"Damn you, Evans. Now I'm hard with nothing to show for it."

Mike paused. "Yeah. We're all hard. And want to get off. Let's just use each other. No orders, no rules, just…sex. No strings, just guys helping each other get off."

Puck stroked his cock. "Puckzilla likes the idea of that. But I ain't taking no cock up my ass."

"Me neither," Finn said immediately. Matt, Sam and Jesse uttered similar statements.

Kurt and Mike looked at each other.

"Michael, what do you say that we give these strapping young men asses their cocks deserve?"

Mike nodded. "I say that sounds hot."

The boys removed their shirts so that they were completely naked.

And that was when the fun truly began.

Finn and Jesse moved towards Mike, sucking at the boy's flesh and capturing his lips in turns.

Sam, Matt and Puck worked on Kurt. Sam kissed his lips heatedly while Puck and Matt worked down his body. Puck travelled down his back while Matt planted kisses down his front, lavishing attention onto his neck and nipples. Puck grabbed a handful of Kurt's ass and grunted, whispering in his ear.

"I'm gonna fuck that ass so hard, Hummel."

Kurt turned to him. "If you're going to be fucking my brains out, you can at least call me 'Kurt'."

Puck nodded. "Kurt it is. Fuck, this ass is so hot." Puck slapped his cock against Kurt's ass, turning Kurt on even more. He glimpsed the sight of Mike wrapping his mouth around Jesse's cock while jerking Finn off and it got him going more.

"Boys. No need to waste any more time. One of you get on your back."

Sam lay down on the floor, cock standing ready and waiting. Kurt straddled him and kissed him before instructing the other two boys to "Amuse yourselves while I have some fun with Sammy."

Puck and Matt shrugged before kissing each other as their cocks brushed up against each other's. Hands flew everywhere as bodies were rubbed and kissed and licked. Finn ran a hand up his body, moaning at the sight of Puck and Matt pressing against each other, only passion and drunken lust between them.

Kurt licked and nibbled down Sam's body before swirling his tongue around the tip of the blonde's cock. He pumped it a few times before hovering over it. Biting his lip ready for the initial pain, he lowered himself down onto the thick length, feeling it press into his tight ass. Sam wrapped his hand around Kurt's cock, hoping to numb the pain with some small spikes of pleasure. Kurt was grateful for this as it worked. He could feel Sam's cock tapping his prostate as he lay, unmoving to give Kurt time to settle. Once Kurt had gotten over the mild pain, he lifted himself almost off the member and slammed back down again. This time, Sam battered his prostate and sent a wave of ecstasy over him.

"Fuck," Kurt hissed as he felt the feeling he had longed to feel for some time now. He had always thought that he would have had to wait for college to finally get fucked, since nobody in Lima was gay or even bisexual to the best of his knowledge. Kurt leaned forward and kissed Sam sloppily once more.

"You good, Kurt?" Sam checked, his eyes unfocused from both the alcohol and the feeling of Kurt's walls clenching around his dick. He knew that he wouldn't last for much longer.

A metre away, Mike was being pounded by Jesse while he had Finn in his mouth, the tall boy moments away from shooting all over Mike's face or in his mouth.

Jesse enthusiastically slapped Mike's ass as he thrusted forward and Mike moaned around Finn's cock. The sensation from that was enough to send Finn over the edge. The tall boy bent his knees and slipped out of Mike's mouth without a verbal warning.

Finn's hand got to work and he looked down questioningly at Mike.

"On my face, Finn," Mike breathed and that was enough for Finn. With a cry, two ropes of cum latched onto Mike's face. To Finn's immense surprise, Mike circled his tongue around the places that he could reach and collected some of Finn's juices in his mouth.

The sight before Jesse ensured that he wouldn't last much longer either. Slamming against Mike's prostate one final time, Jesse pulled out and Mike turned around. Jesse didn't want to come all over his face like Finn did so he jerked himself above Mike's delicious abs. Tugging his manhood, Jesse threw his head back and spilled his come all over Mike's chest and stomach. Finn claimed Mike's mouth for another kiss while Jesse's tongue roamed all over his stomach, licking it clean. Mike moaned into Finn's mouth as the three settled, aware that the other four boys had not finished yet. They were content to watch and fool around some more.

Kurt was riding Sam like a professional now. Bored with slow fucking and pretence, Kurt braced himself and placed his hands on Sam's beautifully chiselled body. He pinched his nipples a few times as Sam pushed up into him and Kurt bounced on the huge member below him in a perfect synchronicity. Sam's hands squeezed Kurt's ass as he felt that familiar feeling which told him that he was pushing himself over the edge.

"Kurt, I'm gonna come," Sam panted as Kurt climbed off him. Sam sat and got himself into a kneeling position, aiming his cock into Kurt's mouth as he frantically jerked himself to his climax, letting out a sweet moan as his seed shot neatly into Kurt's mouth. Kurt swallowed it all like he had done it a thousand times and smirked.

"You taste good, Sammy," Kurt muttered and kissed the blonde, allowing him to taste himself.

Meanwhile, Puck and Matt had gotten themselves as horny and worked up as they possibly could without actually fucking.

"Kurt, get your tight ass over here," Puck called dominantly. Kurt always knew that Puck would be a dominant lover, to suggest otherwise would be preposterous. Kurt broke the kiss with Sam and stood, wedging himself in between the well-built jocks that wanted him. Kurt was still reeling about the fact that this was actually happening.

"I guess I'm about to see what April Rhodes was talking about then," Kurt smirked at them both as Puck grabbed his hips, rubbing his cock at the top of Kurt's ass. Matt claimed a kiss on his neck whilst grabbing Kurt's cock, leaving Kurt in a state of bliss.

Sam had joined the others and were watching the scene before them. They soon realised that Mike hadn't come yet and Sam quickly remedied this. His talented, talented mouth around Mike's cock, Sam bobbed up and down as the Asian boy pushed his head all the way down.

Kurt, Matt and Puck met in a sloppy three-way kiss as their cocks brushed against each other.

"Bend over, Kurt," Matt instructed and Kurt was more than happy to comply. Finn and Jesse groped each other as Mike bucked his hips frantically as he came all over Sam's face.

Kurt placed himself just in front of Matt's cock and licked it quickly. Matt grunted and grabbed his head via his cheeks and guided the pale boy onto his waiting cock. Puck slapped his ass.

"Oh, yeah," he growled as Kurt sucked Matt. Kurt pulled off the other boy and turned around.

"Are you going to fuck me or are you going to wait until next week?" Kurt challenged and Puck grinned, raising an eyebrow.

"With pleasure," Puck grunted as he quickly rammed all his ten inches into Kurt. The boy's hole was still stretched from when Sam fucked him but, amazingly, he was still the tightest Puck had ever fucked. Kurt deep throated Matt as he was filled up with Puck's several inches and he had two cock fully inside him at the same time. Kurt thought such pleasure wouldn't happen for a while, but here he was, being spit roasted by two of the school's hottest guys after being fucked by another one of them.

Out of the three of them, Matt was the first to come. Kurt's talented mouth caused him to not last as long as he had hoped. Kurt had, presumably, only sucked two dicks in his life; his and Puck's. So how was the boy so good at it? Maybe he just had a knack for it.

"You been practising this, Kurt? You been using bananas and pretending it was big, thick cock?" Matt teased as he was now fucking Kurt's face, holding the boy still while he moved his hips back and forth as a rapid pace. He leaned over Kurt and met Puck for a heated kiss as both boys fucked either end of Kurt Hummel.

Puck grinned at him as Matt felt a tug in his body telling him that his orgasm was quickly approaching. Letting Kurt slip off his cock, Matt felt the boy grab his ass and slap it, hoping to enhance his climax. Matt finally came to the sight of Puck rapidly pounding Kurt. Kurt swallowed his second large load in a short space of time as Matt bit his lip and muffled his impending cry. Kurt licked the remaining residue off Matt's cock as the other boy left Kurt to Puck's cock that was furiously destroying him.

Finn could see that Kurt needed something to do with his mouth, so he bumbled over and kissed the panting boy. Kurt cradled Finn's face as he kissed him, Kurt's moans turning Finn on a lot.

Behind him, Puck was performing at his absolute best. If he were to rank his best fucks of all time, this would definitely be number one. And Puck wasn't going to lie and say that he had never thought about fucking guys before. He had just never done it. Now he had. And Kurt Hummel's ass was giving him the most pleasure he had ever gotten from fucking somebody. He would definitely be doing this again. All of those comments he had made about Kurt being into guys were definitely regretted. Because anything that could make him feel like this had to be right. He made a pact to himself to defend Kurt from homophobia in the future. Because every straight guy would love to fuck a guy in the ass, he was sure.

"Fucking hell, Kurt, your ass feels so good," Puck slowed down before speed up again, his balls slapping against Kurt's ass. Kurt let out a moan that was so musical and angelic that it could have only belonged to him.

Kurt was in heaven as Noah Puckerman was slamming against his prostate and slapping his ass. It was simply the hottest thing he would probably ever experience.

Gradually, Puck edged closer to his orgasm and he didn't even want it. He wanted to keep banging Kurt until the apocalypse came because there was no other feeling like it.

"I'm close, Kurt."

Puck reluctantly pulled out and pointed his thick cock at Kurt's face. Kurt wrapped his hand around it and did the work for him until Puck grunted loudly. His come was not as even as Sam's had been and Kurt's was covered in it. Puck kissed him deeply and tasted himself.

"So how was that, Puckerman? You sounded like you were enjoying it."

"It was okay," Puck murmured.

Kurt eyed him suspiciously.

"Okay, it was the best fuck of my life! Happy?"

"Extremely," Kurt replied, preening.

Finn coughed as they all redressed and settled. "So…uh…what we just did. That's something that stays between us. Okay?"

Everyone nodded. Kurt wanted to tell Mercedes, but he was just being accepted by the guys, he couldn't risk that being jeopardised. He nodded, too.

"I take it that we're doing this again sometime," Jesse stated declaratively.

"Oh yeah, definitely," they all chorused.

Finn took a Dorito from the bowl and eyed Kurt carefully as he dipped…in the wrong dip.

"Finn Hudson. Are you double dipping?"

"No," Finn lied with his mouth full.

"That's okay. Your punishment will come soon."

"What?" Finn asked.

"You won't be tapping this anytime soon. Puck seems to think that's a big punishment."

Puck nodded. "Dude, it's fucking amazing. Sam knows."

Sam nodded and the boys laughed at each other.

If somebody ever found out, they would blame the alcohol.

Author's Note: The song, of course, is Drunk In Love by Beyoncé ft. Jay-Z from her fifth album, BEYONCE.