Chapter 2

Laufey and Farbauti led Loki through the great hall and down a hallway. Loki felt as if he were sleepwalking, or perhaps that the things he was seeing and hearing were not quite real, or at least, very, very far away. He supposed that he was still in shock a bit that his life had changed so dramatically in so short a time.

"We won't be having dinner with the court tonight," Farbauti told him as they approached a door at the end of the hall. "That would be too overwhelming for all of us, I think. Tonight, we'll just be having dinner as a family."

"That sounds fine," Loki said, struggling to calm himself down. Was this what shock was like, feeling completely numb yet feeling as if your mind was flying apart in a million pieces?

Laufey opened the door for them, revealing a dining room about a quarter of the size of the great hall. Inside it were a table and chairs, tapestries on the walls, a fireplace large enough to roast an ox in, and two young Jotun men. They were both standing near the fireplace, but they turned when the door opened.

Farbauti laid a hand on the small of Loki's back and propelled him forward. "Loki, I'd like you to meet two people who are very special. These are your brothers, Helbindi and Bylestir."

Brothers? He couldn't believe it. Remembering his manners, he shook hands, and finally asked the question that had sprung into his mind upon hearing that he had Jotun brothers. "Younger or older?"

The brother on the right grinned. "You're our older brother."

"Our little older brother," the brother on the left added.

Loki looked at them, trying to puzzle out which was which. They had the blue-gray skins of Farbauti and Laufey, but they also had the bone structure he'd seen every time he looked in a mirror. It was interesting…and a little unsettling.

"I hope you're hungry," Farbauti said, steering him toward the table. "You've had a pretty big day." She shooed her two younger sons to their places and Laufey took his seat at the head of the table.

"To be honest, I haven't thought about food," Loki confessed as he looked at his chair. Laufey had placed him on the last Jotun chair he'd sat in, but this chair was a bit higher. Carefully, he placed his right foot on the chair's crossbar, grabbed the backrest, and pulled himself up. Once up, he scooted to the center of the seat and…he stared at the tabletop in front of him. The edge of the table was the same height as his sternum. To the Jotuns in the room, he must look like a child seated at the adults' table.

He felt absolutely ridiculous.

One of his brothers appeared by his chair, holding a large cushion. "Try this."

It took a bit of maneuvering, but Loki managed to place the cushion on the seat and then sit down on top of it. With the added height, he felt as if he were sitting at a regular table. He looked over the table and felt a pang of homesickness. There was a table runner in a color similar to the one they had used for family dinners at home, and the dishes, cutlery, and even the glasses…it reminded him of a dinner at home after a long day of studying, doing swordwork with his brother, and generally fulfilling his duties as the younger son of Odin.

He felt tears prick the corners of his eyes and he stubbornly blinked them away. Now was not the time to break down into a blubbering heap of prince. No, he had to remain in control of himself. If he couldn't control himself, then what could he control?

Farbauti sat next to him, and his brothers took their seats. As if on cue, several Jotuns came in, carrying dishes and baskets full of food. The aroma of roasted meat and freshly-baked bread reached him and his mouth watered.

The servers placed their burdens on the table, bowed, and left. In no time at all, everyone had been served and Loki found himself staring at a plate full of roast meat, vegetables, and bread. He regarded the meat with misgiving and glanced around the table. "Is this…beef?" he asked Faurbauti as he picked up his fork.

"Beef?" one of his brothers repeated. "What's that?"

"Meat that comes from a cow," Loki said.

"What's a cow?"

Farbauti glared at her son. "Helbindi, stop that."

He looked at his mother and smiled, radiating innocence. "Stop what, mother?"

The innocent look had not worked, apparently. "You're teasing your brother, and I don't like it. Understand?"

Now Helbindi ducked his head. "Yes, mother. I'm apologize, Loki. I shouldn't have teased you."

"The meat comes from our version of a cow," Laufey put in. "Give it a try."

Loki sliced a morsel of meat and tasted it. For a few seconds, everything was all right. It was tasty, and…HOT! It was very hot! He grabbed hold of the goblet sitting next to his plate and downed it all in one go. He finished off the water and wheezed. "What…was…that?" No wonder Frost Giants were never cold! Their food was so spicy that they couldnever be cold!

"Just roast beef," Farbauti said, refilling his glass. "Are you all right?"

"Spicy…" Loki choked. He'd never had so much spice or seasoning at one time in his life! Eyes still watering and his throat burning, Loki took the goblet and swallowed its contents, and on Laufey's suggestion, he started eating bread to put out the fire in his mouth. After bread and a few more sips of water, the burning lessened to a point where it was bearable.

"Don't Asgardians season their food?" Helbindi asked, clearly surprised by his reaction to what he considered a normal dish.

"Not to this extent," Loki said, his lips still tingling from the spice. He looked at the vegetables on his plate and wondered if they were safe. They looked like a mix of different things, a bright tempting orange and green combination that drew the eye and made him feel even hungrier.

"Those aren't any good with a lot of seasoning," Laufey said, following his gaze. "They should be safe for you."

Loki did not find that particular statement reassuring, but he tried the vegetables anyway. One of them tasted sweet, almost like carrots, and the other…was a vegetable…of some sort. Just what it was, he couldn't say, but it was at least good. He filled up on vegetables and bread, and for dessert there was cake flavored with fruit and a sweet spice that was actually pleasant, rather than excruciating. He was happy to accept a second helping of that, and following that, there was a dark hot drink that made him think of a warm fireside at night.

The cake and hot drink were the best parts of the meal. The rest of it was…uncomfortable. Everyone kept sneaking furtive looks at him when they thought he couldn't see, and the expressions on their faces told him clearly that they'd never thought to see him alive. Loki felt rather like an exotic animal in a menagerie. Then, the dinner conversation started.

"You've had a difficult day," Farbauti began. "I really don't know what to say to you...or if you even feel like talking..."

Here it was. He'd been dreading this part of things. They were going to ask him questions, demand answers...Loki's stomach knotted and he choked down a final swallow of the dark drink. "Ah...talking?"

"There is a lot that we do not know about you," Laufey told him. "And, I'm sure that there are things about us that you would like to know."

What could he say to that? "I'm not sure what to ask first," he said, his mind running a thousand miles a minute. Heavens above, what would he say? What could he say? What would they expect him to say? "What if...what if you asked me questions?" He didn't like the idea of questions, but that way, at least, he would be able to control his answers. If they invited him to just start talking, his nerves would probably make him babble away, and he didn't want to do that.

"What do you like to do for fun?" Bylestir asked, jumping in before anyone else could ask anything.

Relief flooded him. That was an easy question! "Oh, lots of things. I like to go riding, I practice archery, I practice my magic, and during hunts I camp out with…" Loki almost said 'my brother,' but he caught himself in time. "Friends. I'll do swordwork, and when I'm inside I read or do something else. My mo—that is, Frigga, was teaching me some new spells lately, and I've spent a lot of time working on them."

Bylestir suddenly looked very interested. "What spells?"

"She was teaching me how to make it rain," Loki said, just as a few rain drops struck Bylestir's face.

Bylestir jumped up and darted a glance around the room, making his brother and parents laugh. Then, he looked at Loki and grinned. "That's wonderful!"

Loki looked at Bylestir's grin and felt a strange sense of déjà vu. He'd seen the same sort of grin sometimes in the mirror, and at the present moment Helbindi was wearing an identical one, and he had to fight down a grin of his own. It looked like his Jotun brothers shared his sense of mischief.

"I foresee bad things," Laufey said. "What devilry are you planning, you two?"

"Perhaps you have misinterpreted what you've seen, Father," Helbindi stated. "We are planning nothing."

Bylestir nodded. "Absolutely nothing."

Laufey gave both his younger sons a long look. "Uh-huh."

"If it suddenly begins to rain somewhere in the palace, then we will know you two are behind it," Farbauti warned both of them.

"Loki's the only one who can make it rain," Helbindi protested.

"We would know you both put him up to it," Laufey pointed out. "If you do that, I'll put my bow across your backs."

Hearing those words made Loki cringe inside. Laufey had said the same thing when he'd snatched him from the battlefield. It sounded as if it were a common threat, but was it ever carried out? He couldn't be sure.

"If you ever carry out that threat, I'll be amazed," Farbauti said fondly.

Well, then, maybe not, Loki reflected.

Helbindi must have seen that Loki was uncomfortable. "Don't worry, Loki. Father doesn't beat us. He just likes to pretend he will."

"If he's annoyed, he threatens to use his bow on our backs, string us up by our ankles…" Bylestir continued.

"And half a million other things, all equally gruesome or terrible," Helbindi finished. "Don't worry."

More questions followed. They asked about his favorite foods, what kinds of books he liked to read, and what he'd done while growing up. He didn't mind answering those questions at all, and he could tell that the answers he gave relieved them in some cases and made them glad in others.

When Helbindi yawned, Farbauti looked up at what had to be a timepiece on the wall. "If Helbindi is yawning, then it must be late," she said.

"What do you mean?" Loki asked, confused.

"Helbindi loves to stay up late," Laufey explained. "And Bylestir enjoys waking up early. Bylestir looks ready to fall asleep where he is, and Helbindi, you actually look tired. Are you tired?"

"It's been a long day," Helbindi said by way of answer.

"That it has," Farbauti stated. "It's time for all of us to head upstairs for some rest. We can talk some more in the morning."

Until Farbauti mentioned how late it was, Loki hadn't been tired. Now, all of a sudden fatigue descended like a falcon in the dive and struck him. He was tired. No, no tired. Exhausted. He wanted nothing more than to go to his room and rest.

Helbindi and Bylestir both bade Loki goodnight and headed off to their rooms, and Laufey and Farbauti led Loki to his. It was still embarrassing to have Laufey carry him up stairs, but he supposed that was better than risking a fall and a possible broken limb. Laufey carried him upstairs and then once he was at the top, he set Loki back on his feet and led the way down the hall. He veered right through a pair of double doors and down that hallway.

"These are the family rooms," Farbauti told him as they followed Laufey. "Our bedrooms are here, and our family study and sitting room. We do have servants in the palace, but only the most trusted servants come to these rooms. We'll introduce you to them tomorrow."

"That sounds fine," Loki said, wondering if they would ever get to his room. He had to take two strides for each stride of theirs and a hike was not what he needed at the moment.

Just as he finished that thought, Laufey flung a door open and stepped back so that Loki could go in first. "Here we are," he said grandly. "Your room."

Loki stepped inside and looked about. The walls and floor were the same icy-looking stone that he'd seen everywhere else in this place, but the room was spacious and comfortably furnished. The ceiling came to an arched peak at the top, with a soft globe of light hanging down to illuminate the room. The very high, four-poster bed was against the wall to the left of the door, the window was opposite the door, and the fireplace was on the wall to the right of the door. Loki saw a desk next to a bookshelf-with books!-and there were thick brown fur rugs scattered over the floor and near the hearth. There was a sitting area near the main door with two easy chairs and another bookshelf-more books!-and part of him wanted to sit right down and pick up a book, but a door in the right well next to the fireplace drew his attention. "Is that a closet?"

Farbauti opened the door for him. "Your bath," she said. "The fireplace in their shares a chimney with the one in here, so you'll be warm wherever you are in your suite."

Loki felt so grateful that for a moment he had to sit on the impulse to hug her. Despite the clothing he wore and the fur that Farbauti had wrapped around his shoulders, he'd still felt a bit cold. The heat from the fire downstairs had not been able to warm him, but in this room, it was actually comfortable.

A knock on the door revealed a servant carrying a large trunk. Immediately Loki recognized a trunk from his room back on Asgard. "The prince's things, sire." The servant carried it in and placed it at the foot of the bed.

"Thank you," Loki said, his fingers more than ready to tear open that lock and rifle through the contents inside. The last time he'd been this eager to open a box, it had been his name day.

"We'll say good night now," Farbauti said, "and you can settle in. We'll see you in the morning."

"Thank you," Loki said again. "Sleep well."

Laufey put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze, and Farbauti embraced him the same way Frigga would have. Loki suffered through both shows of affection and as soon as the door was closed, he hurried to the trunk and opened it to behold the treasure within.

On the very top was the promised clothing. Shirts, trousers, vests, coats, boots, and underthings, as well as plenty of night clothes. He also found a robe made of a deep green fleece-like material, certain to be warm, and green felt slippers in a matching shade. There was a soft leather satchel, and in the satchel he found a bundle of clean handkerchiefs. Under that was a deep green coat, lined with fur, and a pair of gloves lined with black lambswool. They were fabulously warm and he pulled them on immediately.

In a cloth bag he found his comb, brush, and everything else he used for keeping himself groomed and decent, as well as several bars of his usual soap and a bottle of the sage-scented hand cream he used when the weather turned cold and his hands chapped. That problem had plagued him ever since he was young, and for the first time, he found himself wondering if that was because by blood, he was a Frost Giant. He pushed that thought away and continued digging through the trunk.

Under the clothing were two tapestries, bright with color and he was thankful that he had something to cover the walls with. All of that gray and ice color became boring pretty quickly. He glanced at the walls and wondered just how he was going to manage to hang them. The walls didn't look as if they would hold nails or hooks...shaking his head, he set the tapestries aside and resumed his hunt through the trunk. He found a few of his favorite games...did Frost Giants play the same games as Asgardians? Below the games, there were books. Most of them were his favorites, tales and poems and sagas that he'd read over and over again with pleasure. Others were brand new or taken from the family library. In one of the new books, he found an inscription from Thor. I was saving this for your name day, brother, but now seemed like a good time to send it to you. May it grant you plenty of pleasant evenings reading in front of the fire until we see each other again. My love, always. Your brother. Loki ran his hands over the cover and smiled. Thor knew him so well.

Under the books Loki found more, little mementos that were as familiar to him as the faces of his family. There was his favorite throw pillow from his bed, one that Frigga had given him, and it was embroidered with his name in different alphabets. Frigga had done every stitch herself. Next to the pillow was a stuffed bear that Odin had given him one year when he'd been small. He and that bear had been through many adventures, most of them against Frost Giants...

His throat closed and his eyes suddenly burned with tears. He clutched the bear, the pillow, and Thor's gift and collapsed against the wall, his shoulders shaking with sobs that he didn't dare let out. He couldn't even handle one day on Jotunheim; how in the name of the Nine Realms would he last an entire year?

The storm of tears did not last long and he was able to quell it without too much trouble. He returned his things to the trunk and pulled out a set of nightclothes. He was so tired that he was slowly turning into a blubbering heap of prince, and that would not do. No, he felt as if he had to be a credit to Asgard and make his Asgardian family proud.

He only hoped Heimdall had not been watching.

He went into the bath and washed his face before changing into night clothes. He padded across his bedroom in his bare feet, wincing when his feet touched an uncarpeted bit of floor. How could Frost Giants stand living in a building that was so cold? He took a running leap and jumped the last foot to his bed, scrambling up into the bed. It was a higher bed than he was used to, and so large that four of him could sleep comfortably and not touch each other. The comforter was thick, soft, and warm under his hands, and he slid between it and the bedsheets. There was a veritable pile of pillows for his head and he dropped into them, luxuriating for a moment in the sheer amount of softness they provided. Occasionally, he liked to loll about in bed with a book, and this amount of pillows was perfect for that.

He was laying there, thinking about blowing out the one candle he'd left burning, when there was a knock on the door. He sat up, wondering who would knock so late at night. "Come in."

The door opened to reveal Laufey and Farbauti. "May we come in?"

Loki nodded. "Of course. Is something the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter," Laufey assured him. "We...wanted to come say good night the way we used to when you were young."

Loki wasn't sure about the sound of that. "What did you used to do?"

"Well, you're already in bed, so part of it's done," Farbauti said lightly with a smile. "Your father and I would like to tuck you in. That's all."

I'm not a child was on Loki's lips, but instead, he settled down into the pillows. He was tired, far too tired to argue about such a little thing. "All right."

Farbauti smiled, but she looked a little teary as she pulled his blanket up to his chin and smoothed his hair for him. "Goodnight, Loki. I am so glad that you're here."

It was such a motherly gesture and tone and reminded him so much of Frigga that Loki was hard put to keep his feelings concealed. "Good night."

Laufey reached down and smoothed his hair back as well. "Good night, son. Sleep well, and we'll see you in the morning."

With a last pat to the blankets, Laufey and Farbauti turned down the light and left, closing the door behind them.

Loki lay there for several minutes in the darkness, trying to calm down his whirling thoughts. He was exhausted in all meanings of the word, yet he was sure that he would never be able to sleep. His whole world-everything he had ever believed to be true-was wrong. He was not the son of Odin and Frigga, he was not the brother of Thor, and he was not a prince of Asgard. Instead he was...who? A Frost Giant? Laufey had said that a person of his size was a treasure on Jotunheim, but what exactly did that mean? What could he expect, living on Jotunheim as a "treasure"? What would be expected of him? More importantly, what was he going to do, day after day after day?

How he wished he was back in his room on Asgard.

The thought of that familiar room, of hearing his parents' and his brother's voices, undid him. His throat closed up, his eyes burned, and he knew it was coming.

He got out of bed and got himself a handkerchief. "Heimdall, if you're watching, please ignore the next few minutes. Please."

The storm of tears didn't last long, but before it was over, he'd used three handkerchiefs and ended up back in bed, clutching the pillow and the bear and turning over the book's pages. These were tangible things his family had given him, and he had a strong feeling that he would turn to them time and time again for comfort. Finally, at long last, he could feel himself falling asleep. His last thought that he was only on Jotunheim for a year, and Heimdall, most likely, would be watching him the whole time, on his parents' orders. With that comforting thought, he let himself slip into dreams.