edit posted 5/6/2018
8.
It had been a solid week before anything remotely exciting happened in my life. I was still at home recuperating and trying not to injure myself any further when I had to reach out to Emilie about a pulled stitch. Trinity had helped me the first couple of days with getting myself in and out of the shower and making sure that I ate and everything.
After that I started to make myself get up to move around, much to Trinity's annoyance. She once found me in my room curled up on my side on the floor after trying to look for something in my drawers and not factoring in the angle I was moving in. It was the wrong way of doing things. She made me promise to ask her for help next time.
It didn't mean she was always around. She still had to work at The Sweet Shack. She woke me up in the mornings before she made her way to work, and then came by on her way back in the late afternoon usually bringing dinner with her from one of the various places that was around.
Our mutual favorite was the deli sandwiches that was just down the road from where I lived. The shop owner was an old friend of my mom's and liked to send a couple of extra portions that I ended up eating the next day. He was a very sweet man. This was where Trinity had gone last night before I asked her to call Emilie.
I listened to her explain that she was my best friend and that I had just taken some pain meds so I wasn't in the best state to talk to on the phone without making a fool of myself. She wasn't wrong about that at least. I could barely tell her thank you after she delivered the message and given me a short nod when Emilie agreed to come over first thing in the morning only asking us to make sure that it was disinfected and covered up for the time being until she could make it over the following day.
The day in question I had begun my online work for my job at the call center. I was one of the best at the center so when I had called to inform them of my need to use at least two to three weeks of my built up sick days because I had been in an accident they had immediately asked if I could do some online chats for a few days. They were desperate. They had even mentioned Vanessa the sophisticated woman who was usually distracted by her boyfriend who I had seen once – he was burly man with a penchant for fine suits, very intimidating and mean looking - to focus on the job at hand.
I agreed to fulfill only a few hours a day while I was out. I still needed to live and provide for myself. I did get paid vacation but if I could work while I was at it, I didn't really mind. I wasn't much of a homebody even when I was off from work. I was out talking a walk or doing something with Pa. It helped keep me centered, get diffuser from let myself think too much.
I had spent the past week thinking more than I should. About Jay and the man who I had briefly danced with at the party. About Sam who I still hadn't heard anything from. There was a lot of uncertainty on my part and beyond Trinity and the visit from Pa I got two days ago (at the bequest of his wife) there wasn't much to keep me busy. I watched movies and videos online while trying not to stare at my phone.
I was in the middle of a messaging chat with someone who was labelled as Guest367a. On the few times I had used the messaging feature and not my headset it became clear to me that even then there was no way to know much about the person. From what I had gathered so far the woman was dealing with the loss of her son who had been shot by a police officer in the past week. This was probably one of the hardest cases I've had to navigate. I had to worry about being monitored most of the time but I had asked considering this was my own personal laptop that I didn't want to be tracked. I would email my reports as I finished up with a client but this one was not the easiest nor would I really be able to help her without getting a lawyer involved. I didn't have her name yet but from the location she had given me of where the crime had happened she was in the lower D.C. area, away from the main chaos.
GUEST367A: I already lost his father to a gang incident in Mexico. I don't know if I can deal with another long period of waiting around to get official word.
Me: For now, don't think about the authorities involved. You need to focus on your son and what you loved about him. We can focus on the rest later. We will focus on the rest, I promise.
GUEST367A: Have you ever lost your whole world before? Do you know what that feels like?
I drew in a deep breath, biting my lip for a second. Like with B, this woman was angry. When I had helped him the first time I had to draw on self-experience to let him know that I wasn't just another drone behind a receiver or in this case a monitor.
Me: I do. I almost lost my life once, and more recently my mother passed away. I'm still dealing with each part of it. Grief isn't something that just goes away. I know how that sounds. But, it's something a friend of mine reminded me. Your grief is fresh. The way it happened is unforgivable
–
I was getting ready to continue typing when I heard the knock at the door. I saw Trinity slip pass me to get the door. "Got it." She called as she rushed to open it. I went back to what I was trying to do.
Me: There's no way to accept it. I know I'm supposed to sooth your worries and hope that this doesn't happen to another family but the world is a scary place. I put my faith in mothers like my own who protected me from the harshness of the world until I was ready for it. From what I've gathered he was almost ready for it. Your son would have been happy to have had you guiding him for so long. I know it's the one thing I've learned to remember when I think of my own mother.
The sound of footsteps behind me didn't bother me as I waited for the response from the mother who had truly lost everything. I still had Trinity, and my grandparents. I also had Sam now too, and my professor looking friend who I talked to sparsely. Not to mention the new friends I had cautiously acquired because of Sam, like Emilie who had just arrived.
I looked up once again to see her sitting next to me on the wooden coffee table. She was looking at me curiously. I gave her a short wave as another message pinged. I felt her move to stand over me to see what was going on. I didn't move away from her knowing that she was discreet and would probably offer her opinion if she felt it was needed.
GUEST367A: You're right. I'm sorry about your mother. I just don't know what to do. I feel so broken.
Emilie drew in a deep breath which I could feel against my neck. "Are you counseling?" She asked quietly.
"I suppose in a way. I work for a call center but since I can't go back just yet I'm doing online work. This is a case I've been working on all morning. It's very sad." I tilted my head up slightly so that I could look at her.
Emilie had her nail in between her teeth. She wasn't biting it, it looked like she was mulling something over. "Have you done something like this before? This severe? I used to teach before I was abducted. I forgot I haven't told you about that yet. Later." She commented before continuing on. "I used to deal with delicate situations. A few incidents happened at the school. Had to watch out for the kids like it was my life. I hadn't been there very long before I couldn't go back. I remember reassuring this mother once. It might help her if you don't mind?"
"I don't mind. There isn't much else I can do beyond getting a lawyer involved. This isn't something she can handle on her own. She's going to need to seek counsel. Every single one of the families previously had to. Unless she doesn't want to know any more than that."
"I doubt that. Every person wants to know why their loved one has left the world. Especially in cases like this." She gestured for the laptop and took her seat back on the coffee table. I watched her take a moment once I passed my computer over to her to think on what she wanted to say before she began to type out a response on my behalf.
I heard someone clear their throat from the backside of the couch. I turned to my head to see Trinity giving me a weird look. "What?" I mouthed. She simply gave me the signal for 'okay' as she nodded in Emilie's direction.
I rolled my eyes at her. "She's taken." I told her quietly. This was the second time I've had to tell someone that. Trinity knew better but enjoyed teasing me all the same.
"Bee's not my type." Emilie voiced clearly hearing my part of the conversation. "I adore her already. I mean she's pretty cute, especially when she blushes. She's blushing right now isn't she?" She kept typing all the same never taking her gaze off the monitor as she spoke.
I was indeed blushing. "She might be." Trinity laughed.
"See, cute. Anyway my boyfriend is pretty over protective. When I met him it was a different story. He was trying to find answers about himself and I was running."
"That's funny." Trinity quipped, ignoring the look I was giving her not to bring up Sam right now though I was curious if she heard anything from him. They had seemed close. "She met Sam while running."
"Oh, really?" Emilie asked, her eyes flickering over to me for the barest of moments. She was smiling.
"It was raining." Trinity continued.
Emilie seemed to catch onto my mood. She didn't dig anymore into the story instead made a few more clicks on the keyboard before she passed the laptop back over. "I did what I could. It seems she'll be okay. I sent her the number of the lawyer I had to use a while back to deal with the aftermath of my attack. I'll tell you about it while I look at your back."
I looked over what she had told my client.
Emilie: Take a deep breath. Let it out. Cry if you need to. Write it down. All of it. Everything that you remember. Everything you wished you could have witnessed. It'll help you in the days to come. The first couple months are the worst. You'll dream of him and your husband I suspect. You'll wish that there was something more you could have done. The harsh reality is that you've done everything that you could have ever done for him and that is definitely enough. You're a strong woman and you'll get through this. If you ever need anyone, I'm here for you. Call the center. Ask for Bee. Yes, that's my name. I'll be with you every step of the way.
GUEST367A: Thank you so much. Did your mother really name you after a flying insect?
Emilie: Yes. Still don't know why. I've come to love it. I get that question a lot.
GUEST367A: Okay. Bee. I'll talk to you in a couple of days.
"You sound like me." It was a weird thing to read back.
"I've figured you out already. I just used what I knew and hoped that it worked, I'm happy that it worked."
"Thanks."
"This is adorable but I'm going to go take a short nap while you two are dealing with the blood. I'm not the best around blood." Trinity nose scrunched up a bit.
"I'm glad you've looked after me." I called to her as she started making it down the hallway.
"Yeah. Yeah. I love you too." She shouted in reply.
Emilie laughed as she picked up the backpack that she had brought with her. I moved my laptop to the other side of the couch as I began to lift up my shirt – a light blue tank top – so that she would be able to see what had happened. I heard her hum as the couch dipped slightly behind me as she got situated.
The small nipping of my skin as the gauze was removed had me drawing in a deep breath.
"Sorry." She paused a moment. "Yeah, two stitches. They tore pretty badly. How did you do this?"
"I was getting clothes out of my dresser. Bending down like an idiot. I just hate having people do stuff for me."
"I'm the same way. It's lucky that Bucky and I actually don't mind helping each other out or else there would be problems. We do our own things too. It's an interesting balance. It kind of happened without much talking about it."
"You said you two met because he attacked you without really attacking you?" She must have noticed my confusion as she began to use a cotton swab to clean the area that she was going to have to patch once again.
"That's confusing, I know but yeah. I was taking a run at night and was just about done when he grabbed me and pulled me into an alleyway. He looked intense and uncertain and I just took him to my house. I wasn't afraid of him. The reason being was that I was held hostage and tortured for a long time before I met him. I actually threw a knife at Bucky if you can believe it." She laughed once more.
"Geez. You have some lady balls. He would scare anybody else."
"I guess I'm not everyone else? He saved my life too. Um, you know about HYDRA right?"
I nodded. "He was mixed in with that unknowingly. I don't know how much you know about Bucky but he was brainwashed to kill several people. He had recently figured out that he used to be Steve Roger's friend before they tortured him and changed him. That's how he got that arm of his too. Of course everyone knows that but was still afraid of him. I think even if he hadn't come back for me and saved my life that I would have been grateful to have known him. He really is special."
"I'm getting that sense." I paused a beat as she started to stitch once again. It wouldn't take long to finish this. "What about the other guy, the one who abducted you and hurt you?"
"I ended up killing him." She said it so quietly that I almost didn't hear her. I drew in a shaky breath as she was very still behind me. "It was one of the most terrifying things I've ever had to do. I don't enjoy fighting but I learned that I had to do it to get myself out of there alive. Still do sometimes as much as I wish that that wasn't who I am anymore. Sometimes I'm still fighting to survive. Not just for me."
"For Bucky too?" I asked.
"Yeah. We're stuck together. Forever intertwined. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have him, and Steve. Steve likes to pout but he really doesn't mind me. I've helped him with his girlfriend. They weren't getting much of anywhere because of Steve's past. They're getting somewhere now."
"I'm going to ask a very stupid question but he's Captain America and it's weird thinking of him in relationships. Has he kissed her yet?"
"Not yet. They have this weird thing where they do a lot of fighting together. Different dynamic than Bucky and I, but they don't do much talking about feelings. It works for them, I guess. I can't wrap my head around it."
I hummed.
She went back to stitching me up.
"And Sam?" I had to ask. It was the only way I was going to be able to inquire about him without it being apparent that I really wanted to know. I did though.
"Of course. Sam and Bucky have this interesting relationship. I know they don't always get along but they have this understanding that only two guys who have known Steve Rogers would get. They have their own form of bond as well. Sam is always there when I need him. I can always count on him. You can too." She added.
"Have you heard from them?"
"Bucky hasn't as far as I know."
I turned my head slightly as she put a fresh gauze on the stitch.
"Wait, I thought he went with them."
Emilie shook her head. "He can't go as long as Tony doesn't feel safe around him. I don't see that changing any time soon. He is there for meetings to help with strategy. He was really good at that in the war. I've seen him do it. He knows how to map out an operation so that everybody makes it out alive. He thinks of everything."
I couldn't help it, I smiled at the way she talked about him. Not only was Emilie totally in love with Bucky Barnes she also admired him. It was sweet to see that.
"It shouldn't be too long before they make it back. From what little I managed to get out of him it should only be a couple more days. I'll make sure Sam comes by first thing so you won't worry."
"I'm not." I turned back around as she slid from behind me. I slipped my shirt back on.
"It's okay. He worries about you too." She commented before cleaning up her mess.
When she came back I thanked her. "It's no problem. I don't really do much. It's nice to get out and see people. We should do something when you are able to get outside of the house."
"That would be nice."
"It really would. I haven't had a girl friend in a long time." She looked happy at the idea that I was her new friend. I was pretty glad to have her around too.
"Do you want to watch a movie? I'm gonna be stuck here with no one for a bit. She'll be out until three at the most."
I watched her weight the options before dropping her bag and moving to my other side where my feet was on the couch. She carefully lifted them and slid in place. "What did you have in mind?"
"How do you feel about animation?"
She grinned.
She ended up staying the night keeping me company on the couch. Neither of us exactly wanted to move by the third movie so we both ended up sleeping on the couch with lots of blanket. It got really cold in the front of the house.
A few days passed in the same fashion. Trinity would leave as usual and I would be left to my own devices. I got a few hours of work in before watching something on my laptop. Except that was a small lull in that routine on a particular stormy morning.
The doorbell rang quietly in between a blaze of lighting. I sighed knowing I would have to get up to get it. It wasn't so much a pain anymore to do that. It only hurt a little now to move around. I'd more than likely being going back to work in a few more days.
I maneuvered myself out of the cocoon of blankets I had wrapped around me and slowly made it to the door. A knock came shortly before I had made it to the door. "Hold on a minute." I shouted as loud as I could. It wasn't particularly loud considering my throat was feeling a bit scratchy. I hoped I wasn't getting sick.
As I unlocked the door I immediately let out a curse.
"Shit." It was followed by me pulling the drenched man inside my house along with his blonde friend who was smiling.
"Bee." Steve Rogers greeted as he helped Sam over to the couch where my blankets were spilling all over the floor.
"What the hell happened?" I sighed as I took to sitting on the coffee table, mirroring Emilie from a few days ago.
I wasn't going to move until they told me the truth. Sam had been very tight lipped before and I understood why but at the same time I didn't expect him to turn up like this; beaten up with one arm in a sling.