AN: Thank you all for the faves and follows! It's been longer than I wanted, but we all know that I'm unreliable.
"Ah! The most Youthful Uzumaki-chan! What can we do for you today?"
Naruto grinned and waved merrily as she approached. "Hi, Eyebrows-ji-chan! Eyebrows-nii-chan!"
Just like every other time before, the two green-clad males burst into exuberant tears at the nicknames. Naruto rocked back and forth on her heels, content to wait it out. At this point, she was used to it.
It took barely three minutes – a record - for the two black-haired shinobi to calm themselves enough to talk. They all plonked themselves down on the grass in the middle of the training ground they had been utilising before Naruto interrupted. Twin pairs of round black eyes blinked expectantly at her.
"So, Eyebrows-ji-chan, I was wondering about your Eternal Rival. You said he's really cool, right?"
"Ah-ha!" Eyebrows-ji-chan, AKA Maito Gai, jōnin of Konohagakure, pointed dramatically at her. "Has young Uzumaki-chan found herself a candidate to be her Eternal Rival? Are you here to determine the qualities desired in such a person?"
"Um." Naruto blinked. Went with it. "I'm not sure. Neither of my teammates feel like rivals, really, not like with Lee and that asshole, Neji."
Eyebrows-nii-chan, AKA Rock Lee, genin of Konohagakure, nodded seriously. "I knew immediately that Neji was to be my destined Rival! If you are uncertain about your teammates, then perhaps you are still waiting to meet that special person!"
"Indeed, Lee." Gai rubbed a hand over his chin. "My own Rival, the cool and hip Kakashi, was not on my genin team, although we did go to school together."
Bingo.
Naruto felt her lips curve up into a grin. She wriggled gleefully in place, even as she congratulated herself for being a goddamn genius.
"You know, Eyebrows-ji, you should come by our training sometime. You could see if my teammates have the potential to be proper rivals, and surprise Kakashi-sensei at the same time. Maybe give him some tips! He's still pretty new to this teaching thing." Naruto smiled, face almost as bright as her imagined halo.
Gai gasped. "What? My Rival Kakashi is young Uzumaki-chan's jōnin-sensei?"
"Hm? He didn't tell you?"
"I SEE THE RESEMBLENCE!" Gai shouted. "I SEE THAT KAKASHI HAS BEEN PASSING ON HIS HIP WAYS TO HIS IMPRESSIONABLE YOUNG STUDENTS."
Naruto giggled. "He sure has," she said with mock solemnity. "I'm pretty sure Sasuke has already started to pick up on his habits, -ttebayo. He's started ignoring us even more now, just like Kakashi-sensei does, and he says even less now than he did at the start!"
Sorry, Sensei. It's not your fault Sasuke's such a prick.
Gai hummed, nodding. "Indeed, the young Uchiha does seem the type to be easily influenced by such behaviours."
"So you'll come visit us?" Naruto asked, blinking hopefully.
Two sets of gleaming white teeth flashed at her as both jōnin and genin grinned widely. They had leaped to their feet in order to assume their signature Nice Guy pose, two thumbs up the only thing that Naruto needed to know that she had won.
It took another week for her revenge plan to come to fruition.
Naruto didn't mind too much; the anticipation itself was enough to satisfy her, mostly because she couldn't hide it and was thus freaking the shit out of her team. Kakashi-sensei included.
Knowing what was coming made it easy for Naruto to put up with the stupid, boring chores that everybody dared to call D-ranks, and to get through whatever fresh hell Kakashi-sensei devised for training each day with an unwavering smile on her lips. It may have set her progress with Sasuke and Sakura back a little, but, well. Sacrifices and all that.
(Naruto would know, being a jinchūriki and all).
When the day finally came, Kakashi-sensei was having the three genin facing off against his earth clones again, only with shuriken this time. It was one of Naruto's favourite exercises, if she was being honest. Aside from the whole 'throwing pointy shit at bits of paper that explode', Naruto really enjoyed being back-to-back-to-back with Sasuke and Sakura. She still didn't particularly like them as people, but they were shaping up to be a pretty damn good team. They would be even better once Sasuke stopped being an asshole, and Sakura stopped being such a bubble brain, but Naruto was working on that.
For now, she was confident that they had her back, and she had theirs. It was enough.
Anyway, the three genin were doing pretty well against their sensei's clones, if Naruto did say so herself. They were improving so much so fast; Naruto was definitely stealing the Sandaime's hat before the year was out. Her own improvement at throwing shuriken filled her with giddy delight, and she cackled every time she was the cause of a clone's explosion.
When the smoke from the last one blowing to bits coincided with Maito Gai puffing into existence atop his summoning turtle, Naruto's grin stretched impossibly wide. Kakashi-sensei's eyes widening with absolute horror was so, so satisfying.
"My Eternal Rival, Kakashi!" Gai shouted, leaping from the turtle's back and pointing an accusing finger at the silver-haired jōnin. "I hear that you have finally taken on the honour of guiding Konohagakure's next generation of shinobi! I have come to congratulate you, and offer any advice that you may need."
His smile was blinding, as usual. Naruto thought she heard Sakura whimper.
"Gai."
"Yes, Kakashi?"
"How do you know my genin?"
Naruto laughed. She left her spot between Sasuke and Sakura, skipping up to Gai and throwing him a Nice Guy pose. Which the two of them then turned on Kakashi-sensei.
Who, Naruto was mighty pleased to noticed, looked like he had the world's biggest headache.
"Thanks for coming, Eyebrows-ji-chan," she said, ritual greeting complete. "Kakashi-sensei could really do with your expertise."
Her sensei sighed. "Naruto-chan, why?"
'Because you're a dick', Naruto carefully did not say. Instead, she just smiled and shrugged.
"I thought you would appreciate the help, dattebayo."
His one grey eye blinked dubiously. "Right. Well, whatever. You two," he gestured the other genin closer. "Come here, I promise he doesn't bite. No matter what he looks like."
Sasuke and Sakura both shuffled closer. Their identically wary expressions were a sight that Naruto was going to treasure for the rest of forever.
Kakashi-sensei's introductions were short, but that didn't matter. Naruto had already given Gai all the details last week; he knew pretty much everything about them that she herself did. Which, honestly, wasn't much, but whatever. It was enough.
Gai beamed at them. "It is nice to meet you both! I am Maito Gai, Konoha's Magnificent Green Beast! My own genin are on their way; feel free to ask them anything you want to know about the journey towards becoming an excellent shinobi."
Naruto hastily covered up a snort. Sasuke would die before he asked any genin for advice, and Neji would die before he gave it. Lee was actually inspirational as fuck, but Naruto's teammates wouldn't take him seriously. Hopefully Sakura would talk to Tenten though, because Tenten was fucking cool. If she rubbed off on Sakura even a little bit, Naruto's life would be so much better.
Actually, Naruto was going to introduce Tenten to everybody. The older girl had a way of motivating people without even trying, and Shikamaru could definitely use some of that.
"Your mini-me is coming?" Kakashi asked, already sounding exhausted.
"You guys are gonna love Lee," Naruto assured (lied to) her teammates, grin shit-eating. "He's the best, his taijutsu is the greatest thing I've ever seen." (That part was not a lie).
Gai laughed, chest puffed up proudly. "Indeed, Uzumaki-chan! Lee has put tremendous effort into being the best taijutsu fighter he can be. It makes me unbelievably happy to see that his hard work is paying off."
Black eyes welled up with tears. Sasuke shot Kakashi-sensei an incredulous glance that the jōnin could only shrug at. Naruto didn't notice, because she was rubbing tears out of her own eyes.
Again: inspirational as fuck.
"Oh god."
Naruto blinked, peeking past her fists at her sensei. He was watching her with more than a little desperation. She held back a grin.
Too easy.
"What is it, Sensei?" She asked, knuckling at her eyes once more for good measure.
"Please tell me that you haven't been infected by Gai and his little clone, Naruto-chan."
Gai made a hmph sound. "Uzumaki-chan could do no better than Lee as a role model, Kakashi."
Naruto dropped her fists to her hips, nodding emphatically. "At least they're not perverts, Sensei."
It was probably a good thing that Lee chose that moment to explode out of the trees, closely followed by an exasperated Tenten and the ever-unimpressed Hyūga Neji. As the three older genin got closer, Naruto had the pleasure of watching Sakura and Kakashi-sensei try to fold in on themselves in an attempt to escape. Sasuke was probably too prideful, but even he was standing stock still, like he was trying to blend in with the background.
"Gai-sensei!" Lee came to a halt in front of them, grinning broadly and standing in a classic Nice Guy pose. "We have found you!"
Neji and Tenten slowed down much more sedately. Tenten waved at Naruto, smiling and rolling her eyes at her teammate. Naruto grinned back, jerking a thumb at her own. Something warm and precious sparked to life in her heart at the conspiratorial actions; it felt a little like having a friend.
"Lee!" Gai cried. "Tenten! Neji! You all know my Eternal Rival, yes?"
Kakashi-sensei gave them a sarcastic little finger-wiggle of a wave.
They all nodded back (one with more enthusiasm than the others).
"And of course you know the young Uzumaki-chan," Gai continued, shooting her a quick smile. Naruto returned it with two thumbs up. "But these two-" he whipped an arm out to indicate Sasuke and Sakura, who had not managed to become chameleons in the last few minutes. "Are her genin cellmates – your newest kouhai."
Literal sparkles exploded into being around Lee's head.
Unfortunately, before he could leap on Naruto's teammates, Tenten had taken him by the collar and was smiling warmly at them instead. "Congratulations on graduating," she said, slapping a casual hand over Lee's mouth. "I'm Tenten, and these are my teammates, Rock Lee and Hyūga Neji. We were in the year above yours, so if you've got any questions about being a genin, you're welcome to come ask us."
Neji didn't look like he agreed with that.
That was okay; Naruto never particularly cared about what he had to say anyway, the fate-obsessed dick.
Gai was crying again though, proud tears pouring down his face like a waterfall. Kakashi-sensei was starting to look a little flighty, much to Naruto's delight. She sidled up to him and grabbed onto his arm, hugging it tightly to herself. The pained expression he directed down at her was enough to feed her soul for months.
She beamed back.
"Naruto-chan," he whispered it out of the corner of his mouth. "You realise I have to get you back for this, right?"
Complete and utter glee shot through her. She wiggled in place, squeezing his arm even tighter. "Do your worst, Sensei."
A large hand dropped into her hair, ruffling vigorously. "You're going to regret saying that, brat."
Naruto just shook her head, grinning. She dropped her captive arm and skipped over to fling herself at Lee. He'd been excitedly recounting stories of C-ranks that Team Gai had been on to Sasuke and Sakura (under Tenten's close supervision), but he took her weight with little to no effort, simply taking a moment to heft her higher up his back. Naruto rested her chin on his shiny black hair, smiling down at her fellow genin with the air of a particularly satisfied cat. Her teammates and Neji stared back at her suspiciously, but Tenten just laughed and patted her leg.
"You've had a pretty good day, ne, Naruto?"
She had. She really had.
And it was so cute that everybody seemed to think she was finished.
Her smile turned into grin so toothy that everybody took a step back, expressions turning wary. "The best. And it's not over yet."
AN: Y'all know the drill! Thoughts always welcome(:
- Kelly