I do not own 'Phineas and Ferb' or anything related.
The escorts, who made up most of the Inner Circle, had gathered to discuss who would win the Hungry Games this time. They were a variety of beings; humanoid, animal, anthropomorphic.
"Well I think my tribute is going to win this year!" Boasted the escort for District 2, a large t-rex.
"HA HA HA HA!" Laughed the escort for District 10, a cyborg with two pipes going from his head to back, "YOUR TRIBUTE HAS NOT WON IN SOME TIME! THE TIME FOR DISTRICT 10 TO BECOME THE MAIN WINNER HAS COME!"
"No, no," Whispered the escort for district 9, a shadow shaped like a witch who spoke with a quiet, raspy voice, "My tributes are just as likely to win as yours."
"HA. ONE DOES NOT HAVE POWERS AND NEITHER DOES THE OTHER WIHTOUT HER WAND."
"Your tributes may be the usual winners," Said the District 6 escort, a giant scorpion, "But my tribute is unbeatable."
"WHAT, THE CRYER?" Asked the District 4 escort, a fiery skull.
"He may be a cryer, but he will do what is necessary. And then cry about it afterwards."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Laughed the escort for District 12, a man in a white lab coat with an exaggerated face, "Don't be quick to disregard MY tributes! This time, science shall win the day!"
"Oh please, the girl has a chance, yes, but the boy without a robot guardian is certain to die!"
"I THINK MY TRIBUTES ALSO HAVE A CHANCE OF WINNING," Said the District 4 escort.
"YOURS? THEY ARE ONLY CHILDREN. I KNOW THAT ALL OF THE TRIBUTES ARE CHILDREN BUT THEY ARE NOT EVEN ADOLESCENTS. NOR ARE THEY CHILDREN WHO HAVE BEEN TRAINED TO FIGHT."
"THAT MAY BE SO, BUT TOGETHER THERE IS NOTHING THEY CAN'T ACCOMPLISH!"
"And subsequently one of them will end up expiring," Said a snake coming out the head of the District 13 escort (who also had gorilla arms).
"Sniff!" Sniffed one of the escorts for District 3, a living teddy bear, "It's so tragic when that happens!"
"Well I think my guy-" The escort for District 5, who resembled a large, green tube with two smaller tubes for eyes and long strings for arms started to say before everyone interrupted him.
"YES?"
"…Never mind," He finished.
"DUH, I think my tributes have a chance to win!" Said the District 13 escort.
"Silence, you ignoramus!" His snake whispered.
The other escorts looked at him, before bursting into laughter.
"Gorilla Arms," Said the District 2 escort, "There is a reason why your district is known as the loser district along with 3, 7 and 11! It's because yours rarely get to be victors! I mean I think the only other district whose track of winners is lower than yours is-"
Sammy just happened to come in at that moment.
"Hey everyone!"
She slivered next to the District 9 escort.
"Hey there, Shady! Us girls have got to stick together, right?"
It was hard to see what expression the District 9 escort had (considering that she had no face), but she just silently glided away.
"Awww. So, what are we talking about?"
"We were talking about who would win this time," Said the District 7 escort, who had four legs, a brain for a head with flexible eye stalks and large, bat-like ears.
"Oh, I think my guys have a chance."
Everyone looked at her, before they all burst into harder laughter.
"What?"
"Come on, Sam," Said the District 2 escort, "Everyone knows that District 1 have the lowest number of winners! What makes you possibly think you have a chance?"
"Because I have Phineas and Ferb!" Sammy announced proudly.
"INPUT SARCASTIC REMARK REGARDING MENTIONED TRIBUTES' FIGHTING CAPABILITIES." Said the District 10 escort.
"Hey, they've accomplished lots of battles! Like the time they defeated the 2nd dimension Doofensmirtz. OR the time they fought that giant Mayan statue. OR the time they fought Doofus Khan's giant mecha? Or when they fought Malefidoof and his army-"
"Most of those were all alternate versions!" Snake Hair pointed out.
"So?"
"Face it, Sam," Said the District 2 escort, "Your tributes have less chance of winning than the loser districts. So what does that make yours?"
Everyone's laughter infuriated Sammy.
"You'll see! They'll beat the others, you'll see! Then we'll see who's laughing!"
Phineas had a strange yet realistic dream about celebrating Christmas. After waking up, Phineas met Doofensmirtz in the dining room. Phineas noted the Christmas Decorations, even though he was sure it was Summer. Doofensmirtz noticed his confusion.
"Oh apparently it was Christmas a couple of days ago."
"Christmas?"
"I know, I know, it's confusing. It's best not to think of the time differences here."
They had breakfast.
"Now then, what are your skills?"Doofensmirtz asked.
"Well, me and my brother are able to make a lot of inventions!"
"Ah, a fellow inventor! But what about on your own?"
"I don't know. Me and my brother do everything together."
"Well you're gonna have to learn to function on your own. In the training room there will be a number of training stations to hone your skills for the games. I'd recommend the trap station."
"The trap?"
"Ah, this is my favourite part of mentoring! I get to tell all about my backstory!
"You see, back in my home town of Gimmelstump, I did not have a happy childhood. My parents didn't show up for my own birth, for the first several years of my life I was raised by ocelots, I was forced to be a garden gnome, not to mention wearing dresses because my mother had knitted all these dresses for what they thought was going to be a girl turned out to be a boy, even though my younger brother Roger from being their favourite."
"Oh hey! Major Doofensmirtz is your brother?"
Doofensmirtz stared at him.
"Ahem. First rule of Backstory. NEVER interrupt the backstory!"
"Sorry."
"Now where was I? Oh yes! So anyway, when the reaping was called, would you believe it, my name was pulled out! During the training I was pretty bad at all the stations. Swords, firemaking, climbing, you name it! But the one station I excelled at was traps. I was able to make all sorts of traps; noose traps, bear traps, the trap where you cover the hole, that rope trap where your foot gets in the middle before it yanks you in the air, you name it! All at which proved useful in taking down other tributes."
"Oh cool! So in the arena, I don't have to hurt anyone, I can just trap them!"
"Oh no, a trap can't hold your opponent forever! But it just needs to hold them long enough for you to do the deed!"
Phineas understood what 'the deed' meant. He gulped.
"Now then, while in the station, I want you to keep away from your brother."
"But Ferb and I-"
"Enough about your brother!"
Doofensmirtz slammed his fist on the table.
"You will remain separate and you will not be amicable with each other! Understand?"
Eventually Phineas nodded.
"Good."
Phineas and Ferb were silent as Sammy led them to the training room. Phineas eyed Ferb, and when he looked back Phineas quickly looked away.
"And don't worry, you two," Sammy told them as they reached the door, "I'll be right in there with you."
Phineas looked at him.
"You'll be in there? What are you talking about?"
"Oh I forgot to mention! I'm a game maker, as well as an escort and member of inner circle."
"Wait a minute, ALL the escorts are game makers? But wouldn't that mean the people in charge of designing the arena we'll be in will be intent to make sure that their tribute will win?"
"Oh don't worry, everyone has an equal say (Apart from Quasi and Ben, who share District 3)! Although it feels like not everyone is listened to, including me. Anyway, they're not all biased! There's Mortuus, there's Felus, and of course there's the president!"
"The President's a game maker?"
"A game maker? Oh no no no no! He's THE game maker! He's the Head game maker!"
Phineas looked at the other tributes. He noticed that the district 4 tributes were the only ones dressed identically. He also noticed the game makers in a booth. The president was wearing his white suit, drinking from a wine glass that what looked like pond water, with a worm swimming in it. The door opened. A skeleton in a black cowl holding a scythe entered. He was followed by rows of skeletons. The sight of him frightened everyone in the room (Even most of the careers!). The only ones who didn't flinch, or yell, or scream, or back away, or cry were the girl from District 9 and the girl from district 12. The figure circled them, his scythe resting on his shoulder.
"I know what you are thinking. So let me assure you. I am not Death. My name is Mortuus. I merely resemble the personification of Death. I will be your training instructor."
Slamming his scythe into the floor in front of them, Mortuus' hands laid on the end.
"23 three of you will die. That is certain. But which one of you will survive? That is where the uncertainty lies."
He stared at them with his red glowing eyes. Mortuus marched in front of them.
"The survivor will be cold, ruthless, level headed, strong, intelligent-"
"What ever is awaiting me in the arena, I will defeat everyone!" The District 2 boy boasted.
"DO NOT BE SO CONFIDENT!"
Mortuus had the edge of his scythe at the boy's throat.
"OVER-CONFIDENCE CAN GET YOU KILLED!"
"Whatever! Everyone knows that the most wins go to District 2!"
"So, you wish to test yourself?"
"Yeah!"
"Very well then. Everyone, stand in order of your districts, from 13 to 1, right to left."
"Should boys go first, or vice versa?" A tribute asked.
"It makes no difference. You are equally dead to me."
The tributes were in order. Mortuus tossed his scythe to one of the district 13 tributes, who fumbled with it.
"First, we need some targets."
Snapping his fingers, 13 skeletons queued up.
"Use the scythe to cut down the skeleton."
Phineas noticed the skeleton shaking. The tribute brought the scythe up, but struggled with the weight.
"No no no no, first you must feel it in your hand. be comfortable with it, let it become an extension of yourself."
The tribute tried it, but struggled against the weight, and missed the target. Mortuus took the scythe.
"Next one."
He tossed it to the next tribute, who also stumbled with it.
And so it was. Some of the tributes, especially the younger ones, struggled using the weapon and using it properly. Others, noticeably the careers, proved to be capable users. The boy from district 10 (Who looked like an alien, with turquoise skin, green hair, pointed teeth and antennae, who also had a bulky and muscular build) used one hand to cut his opponent down. The girl from district 9 (Who had blond hair and skull and crossbones on her cheeks) actually ran towards her skeleton and leapt into the air, crying as she spun. Her opponent exploded into pieces. The boy from the same district (Who had brown hair and a mole) at first didn't seem to know what to do with it, but once he became familiar, actually spun it (Phineas noticed that Mortuus looked intrigued when he did that) before raising it in the air, and with "HIYA!" sliced his opponent in two. They weren't the only ones, though. The girl from district 12 also confidentially held the weapon, and used it to slice her skeleton in two. Soon it was the district 6 boy's turn. He seemed capable of using the scythe. He raised it. Something was stopping him. Sighing, he lowered the scythe.
"Mr Mortuus, I can't use this."
Phineas knew why. The boy, like him, could see that the skeleton did not want to be cut down. The training instructor's eyes changed shape as if he was frowning.
"How predictable."
Mortuus pried it from his hands. He tossed it to his fellow district tribute.
"Show him how it's done. But before you do that -"
He tossed an hourglass to the skeleton. He looked alarmed. The hourglass exploded like a grenade, sending bones flying everywhere.
"What was that for?" The District 6 boy demanded.
"To teach you a lesson," Mortuus answered, "Sparing your opponent does not save their life. It only delays the inevitable, from a possibly worst fate. Now then other 6, proceed."
The girl sliced her skeleton in two.
"I think I'm more comfortable using a sword," She answered.
"It does not matter what you are comfortable using. In the arena, you don't know what weapons will be available. So you must not rely on the skills you already have."
Later, it was the purple haired boy from district 5's turn, who spun the scythe in his hand only for it to fly out and almost hit another tribute.
"My bad. Let me try again."
"COUGH!"
Mortuus looked at the president, who it seemed was almost choking on the worm in his drink. He took the scythe away.
"I've seen enough."
"Please! Give me another chance-"
"There are no second chances in the arena. Remember that."
After the district 2 girl sliced her skeleton in two, it was the boy's turn, who lunged at his skeleton, hacking him to pieces.
"I have made my decision. Most of your are incompetent. I do not see you surviving in the arena. A few of you are adequate, and some have potential," He look in the direction of the district 9 tributes.
"But you," He turned to the district 2 boy, "Using such an eloquent weapon simply for hacking and slashing."
The boy was enraged at his words.
"I'll hack and slash you!"
Roaring, he slashed at the training who just effortlessly dodged the blows before catching the blade with his fingers. He kicked the boy away, the scythe spinning in the air before being caught by Mortuus.
"The scythe is the ultimate weapon. Swift as a sword. Strong as an axe. flexible as a staff. To become the ultimate survivor, you yourself must be like this scythe - strong. quick. adaptable."
As he spoke, Mortuus twirled the scythe in his hand, letting it slide up and down, spinning it around his body. Then, without warning, he sliced through one of the remaining skeletons, as if committing several swipes in a single attack. The skeletons fell apart into pieces.
"However, the weapon is only as powerful as its user. To use it effectively, you must be calm of mind. You must be creative. And above all, you must have a killing instinct."
He looked at the boy who refused to attack his skeleton.
"However, surviving each other is only half of surviving the games. The other half is surviving the arena itself. Most tributes die from natural causes. 10 percent from infection. 20 percent from dehydration. Exposure can kill as easily as a knife. In this room there are stations to train you, each for a specific skill. there are two categories, combat and survival. There will be assistants at each station to train, and who you can practice your combat skills on."
Skeletons arrived at each station. He walked away.
"Um, sorry, Mr Mortuus," Phineas held up his hand, "But me and my brother haven't had our go."
"No need. I already know how you will fare."
He looked at Phineas.
"Unless you want me to test you."
Phineas was hesitant.
"That's what I thought."
He continued to walk away. Suddenly he raised his fingers and snapped them. The two remaining skeletons let out a screech as they lunged at Phineas and Ferb. The two fell backwards. A curve of energy destroyed the two skeletons before they had a chance. Everyone looked at Mortuus, his scythe glowing.
"If I had not intervened you would be dead. I will not be in the arena to save you again."