-A/N: hello everyone and welcome back! As always thank you all for the lovely reviews, they truly encourage me to keep going. And I promise, all the questions you have will be answered in time.
Enjoy.
…
The next two weeks flew by in a blur for Rachel. After staying at the small cottage with Shelby for a night, both of her fathers had been taken into custody and were currently awaiting a trial that would take place near the end of summer, meaning Shelby had been given full custody of Rachel. After being given the all clear by law enforcement, Shelby had allowed Rachel an hour to go back to her dads house and collect some of her things, 'only necessities though, Rach. I'll buy you all new things for here so you can start fresh and make this your new home.' Her mother had told her, and it had stuck in Rachel's head for the hour she packed up some of her most prized possessions. Shelby's voice had sounded forced and over cheerful and it didn't sit right with Rachel, but she brushed it off. Returning back to Shelby's home with five minutes to spare and quietly thanking her for allowing her to go before retreating up to her room.
And that's how things had been the last two weeks. Quiet. Rachel felt like an intruder in Shelby's home, like she didn't belong. She felt as if she was constantly getting in the way, so she tried to make herself scarce. Shelby tried to make her feel loved, Rachel could tell she was genuinely trying. She showered her with hugs and kisses on the head, bringing her snacks and checking on her before she went to bed.
Even with Shelby showering her in affection, things were still awkward. There were long pauses at the dinner table, filled with uneasy tension. There were times they both went to speak at the same time, cutting the other off, before they both fell into an uneasy silence.
Rachel couldn't understand why something she had longed for her entire life, suddenly felt so wrong. Maybe her daddy had been right, maybe she was unlovable. Maybe Shelby loved the idea of having a daughter, and Rachel wasn't meeting her expectations.
Rachel was startled from her thoughts by a soft knocking on her bedroom door and she quickly brushed at her face, wiping away tears she didn't even know had been falling. "Come in."
Shelby's face appeared a moment later, her gentle smile immediately putting Rachel at ease.
"You have a visitor." She said softly. "I was going to run to the store to grab some things for dinner tonight. Do you need anything?"
Rachel scrunched her face in confusion, a visitor? "No, I'm okay, thanks."
Shelby nodded and opened the door wider, allowing a tall blonde to step into the room before she gently shut the door, leaving Rachel alone with the last person she wanted to see.
"You've been avoiding me." Quinn said bluntly, flopping herself onto the bed and sitting down next to Rachel. "I know you don't have a lot of friends, Berry, but ignoring someone's calls and texts, especially after that someone had just given birth, is considered rude."
Rachel stole a glance at Quinn out of the corner of her eye and noticed she was practically back down to her pre-baby weight. Her figure was lean again, her skin was glowing and there wasn't a single hair out of place on her head. She was back to head Cheerio Quinn. And that scared Rachel.
"You look good, Quinn." Rachel said softly.
Quinn scoffed and rolled her eyes. "That's all you have to say after ignoring me for over two weeks?" She said with a raised eyebrow. "Clearly you've been busy, seeing as you suddenly rekindled your bond with good ole mommy dearest and ditched the dads to come live with her."
There it was. The bitter harshness in Quinn's voice was exactly what Rachel had been waiting for. "What I'm doing here is none of your business, Quinn." Rachel spat back, angry at herself for believing Quinn was ever her friend. For falling for another one of the cheerleaders mean pranks.
Quinn threw her hands up in frustration before sitting up straighter on the bed. "Yes it is." She said, drawing out each syllable to emphasis her point. "We're friends. Friends tell each other things."
"Since when?" Rachel yelled, finally snapping. "Since when have we been friends, Quinn? You have been nothing but horrible to me since the day I met you." She cried. "Have we been friends since you threw the first slushy in my face? Or did we become friends when I found out who Shelby was and I heard you say to Mercedes you couldn't blame her for ditching me?" Rachel stood up wanting to be away from Quinn. "My entire life you have torn me down and made me absolutely hate myself. Sorry if I don't consider that friendship." She sniffed. "You caught me on a bad day when you took me to breadsticks. I was lonely and I was naive. But we are not friends Quinn."
Rachel watched as Quinn sat on her bed and slowly nodded her head, before standing up. "You're right." She started, brushing imaginary dust off of her leggings. "We were never friends. But being a mother changes you." She said, and Rachel saw her eyes fill with sadness. "My last month of my pregnancy, all I could think about was how if anyone ever treated Beth the way I treated you, I would be heartbroken, and then I'd want to kill whoever was tormenting my baby." She paused, looking up to meet Rachel's eyes. "And then I realized what that said about me as a person." She laughed humorlessly. "I was mean to you, Rachel, because I was jealous. You had so much going for you and I had nothing. So I picked on you. And I'm sorry."
Rachel stood dumbfounded, unable to move from her spot on the floor. She was expecting Quinn to scream at her for the way she talked to her, not an apology.
"Thank you," She said lamely, "for the apology. It means a lot. And while I don't exactly forgive you for everything you've done to me in the past, I'm willing to put it behind us and start fresh."
"I don't expect you to forgive me. What I've done to you is horrible. All I ask is that you give me a chance to prove that I've changed, and that I'm actually a pretty good friend when I want to be." Quinn said, surprising Rachel with how vulnerable she was being.
"Well, as a friend, can I ask you for some advice?" Rachel asked hesitantly.
"Hit me with it, Berry."
…
Shelby sighed as she got home from the store and saw that Quinn's car was still in her driveway. She was happy Rachel had someone to talk too about everything that was going on, honestly she was. But that didn't mean she wasn't just the slightest bit jaded that Rachel was choosing to talk to Quinn instead of her.
The past couple of weeks had been nothing short of frustrating for Shelby. It seemed that no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't connect with Rachel. She understood the girl was going through a whirlwind of emotions herself, but Shelby had hoped that they would at least be able to bond a little bit.
But there had been no bonding. Shelby had barely gotten anything more than a small smile out of Rachel since sharing with the younger version of herself that she had received full custody. Dinners were awkward, conversations were strained, and Shelby constantly found herself second guessing what to do or say when around her daughter, and she didn't like it.
"Bye Mrs. Corcoran. Sorry for dropping by unannounced." Quinn said softly from behind her, pulling Shelby from her thoughts as she turned on the oven.
"Anytime, Quinn." She said earnestly. "Do you want to stay for dinner?"
"That's okay, I have some things I have to do tonight. Thank you though!"
Shelby smiled as she watched the girl grab her keys and head out the front door. She turned her attention back to the oven before she was interrupted from her thoughts again.
"Hi." Rachel said softly, standing at the entrance of the kitchen.
Shelby didn't know what it was, maybe it was a motherly instinct, or maybe she was just turning soft, but whenever she saw Rachel she felt her entire insides turn to mush. "Hey, baby." She said, the nickname slipping easily from her mouth. "I'm just starting to make dinner if you want to go watch TV until it's done."
"Do you need any help?" Rachel asked her tentatively.
"Sure!" Shelby exclaimed, passing over a cutting board and some vegetables to the counter. "If you want to chop these up for the lasagna that would be great. I'll get working on the sauce."
She watched as Rachel nodded and began slowly cutting up the vegetables, her eyes darting up to Shelby's every so often before quickly fixing them back on the cutting board.
"What's up kiddo? Everything okay?"
Rachel didn't look up from the cutting board as she continued cutting and gave a slight shrug of her shoulders. "I'm sorry things have been so tense. I, I know it's my fault. I'm trying to get settled in, I really am. You've been amazing and I just," Rachel sniffed and Shelby felt her heart break as the young girls bottom lip trembled. "I don't want you to get sick of me and change your mind again." She finished quietly.
"Oh, sweetheart." Shelby said softly, taking the knife out of Rachel's hand before pulling the girl into her arms. "I'm never going to get sick of you. And I'm never going to change my mind. Ever." She said firmly. "It's okay to be struggling to adjust, I am too. This is very different for both of us." She felt Rachel nod against her chest and placed a gentle kiss to her head. "Which is why I've booked an appointment for a therapist. It's not for another two weeks, but with everything you've been through, I think it would be healthy for you to talk to someone."
Rachel looked up at her through wet eyelashes and Shelby had to suppress the tears at just how young Rachel looked. How did she walk away from her before?
"You did that for me?" Rachel asked softly. "Maybe Quinn was right." Shelby heard her murmur to herself.
"What was Quinn right about?" She asked, pulling back slighting to look the girl in the eyes.
"Oh," Rachel started, a light blush creeping up on her cheeks, "I just asked her about her relationship with her mom. She told me that before they didn't have a great relationship, but now she can go to her with anything." She rambled. "She said a mother's love is unconditional and that you would do anything for me."
"I would do anything for you." Shelby said, placing a kiss on her forehead. "I think you need to listen to Quinn more often." She said with a wink. "Now, go to the living room. I'll finish up here. After dinner I have a little surprise for you."
"Okay. Thank you, Shelby." Rachel said quietly before making her way into the living room.
Shelby brushed off the hurt at not being called mom and turned back to the oven to finish dinner. She knew she had to let Rachel do it on her own time, and she had prepared herself in case that time never came. But it still stung.
An hour later and dinner was cleaned up and Shelby and Rachel had made their way into the living room.
"Pick out a movie and I'll be right back." Shelby told her daughter gently.
When she returned she saw the opening credits of funny girl playing and smiled softly to herself. Genetics really were amazing. She picked up the remote and hit pause before sitting down next to Rachel.
"I said earlier I had a surprise for you. It's not much, but I think it might help me show you how much you've always meant to me." She said gently, handing her a box.
She watched as Rachel took the box and shot her a puzzled look, opening it up and then looking back up at Shelby for an explanation.
"Birthday cards." Shelby said awkwardly. "One for every year. And Christmas cards, Hanukkah cards, random letters. I've saved them through the years and planned on giving them to you when you turned eighteen, but I thought now might be better."
Shelby watched as Rachel delicately thumbed through the cards in the box and forced down her feelings of embarrassment. She could be emotional in front of her kid. She had too.
"Thank you." Rachel said, her voice thick with emotion. "I- I've never had someone do something like this for me."
Shelby nodded sympathetically and scooted closer tentatively wrapping an arm around her.
"I know I've screwed up in the past, Rachel. Walking away from you for a second time is the biggest mistake I've ever made. But I promise I have always loved you, and I'll spend the rest of my life proving it to you." Shelby said earnestly. "But there's one more thing."
Rachel looked up at her and cocked a questioning eyebrow, and Shelby had to hold back a laugh at how much the young girl resembled herself in that moment.
"We've been through a lot in the short amount of time we've been together." She started. "And I feel as if we haven't really had a chance to just be a normal mother and daughter." She glanced at Rachel to gauge her reaction at the word mother and was encouraged to keep going when she saw the girl smile. "So I've booked us a trip to New York City next week. A mother daughter trip. I thought we could make it an annual thing. We'll do everything, Broadway shows, sightseeing, shopping. Whatever you want." Shelby rushed out. "Sorry, I'm rambling, but-
She was cut off by the force of a tiny body launching itselfs into her arms. After the initial shock wore off, she immediately wrapped her arms around Rachel and held her tightly. Reveling in the fact that she was holding her baby.
"Thank you so much." Rachel said into her shoulder.
Shelby held her tighter and placed a quick kiss to her temple. "You're welcome." She muttered. "I can't wait to have a week away with you."
Rachel pulled back and smiled shyly. "Me too." She said before grabbing the blanket off the back of the couch and draping it over herself and Shelby and snuggling into her side. "Now let's get our Barbra on."
Shelby laughed and wrapped her daughter closer into her side. "Anything for you, babe."
…
The next week passed by in a blur for Rachel. Shelby had taken her shopping and bought her a completely new wardrobe for the summer, even though she had resisted. On top of that she had bought Rachel a new bedroom set for her room and mountains of decorations, insisting she wanted Rachel to feel at home. And as if that wasn't enough, she had taken Rachel grocery shopping with her and practically forced the girl to pick out all her favorite vegan snacks, again insisting that she wanted the girl to have things she liked to eat in the house.
Between the shopping and the packing, Rachel was exhausted, but excited. She could see Shelby was trying more than anything to make her feel at home and that she was truly making an effort. Rachel was finally starting to feel settled. They were leaving the next morning for New York, and Rachel was genuinely excited to spend quality one on one time with Shelby.
"Shelby?" Rachel asked quietly, standing outside the door of the older woman's office.
"What's up, Rach?" Shelby asked, quickly shuffling papers off of her desk and giving Rachel her undivided attention.
"Do you mind if I go hang out with Quinn for a little bit?" Rachel asked nervously. "If not it's okay I just-
"Rach," Shelby said, effectively cutting her off, "that is absolutely fine. Do you need a ride?"
"No," Rachel said, smiling sheepishly, "she's kind of already waiting in the driveway."
Shelby laughed before standing and making her way over to Rachel. "Can I get a hug before you go?"
Rachel greedily latched onto Shelby and inhaled her soothing scent. She hated feeling clingy, so it wasn't often that she sought out Shelby for comfort. But whenever Shelby initiated any form of contact, Rachel savored it each and every time.
"Just don't be out too late. We have an early flight tomorrow." Shelby said, giving her a wink.
"I won't." Rachel replied before quickly making her way out the front door and into Quinn's car.
Rachel got into the car and shot the blonde her best show face smile. "Hey!" She said brightly. "Where are we going? Your text was really vague."
"You'll see." Was Quinn's reply before she threw the car into reverse and started heading towards the unknown destination.
A half hour later and Rachel found herself sprawled out on a blanket in a grassy meadow, eating strawberries and laughing with Quinn. "This is awesome. Definitely not what I had in mind, but I love it." Rachel said during a moment of silence.
"What exactly did you have in mind?" Quinn asked, turning her head to stare at Rachel.
"I don't know." She answered honestly. "I've never really had a friend before. So I wasn't sure what exactly 'hanging out' entailed."
"I'm sorry." Quinn said quietly.
"How are you doing?" Rachel asked, ignoring the apology. "You know, since Beth?"
Rachel studied Quinn's face and watched as a mixture of emotions passed through her eyes. She felt her heart ache for the blonde and slowly reached out and grabbed her hand.
"I'm okay." Quinn said softly. "Some days are better than others. But it's an open adoption, and whenever I'm ready, I can go and see her." She sniffed. "But I'm not ready yet."
"Whenever you're ready, I'm here for you Quinn." Rachel said, squeezing the girls hand. "I could even go with you, if that's something you would like."
Quinn turned and looked at Rachel, her eyes filled with an emotion Rachel couldn't quiet place. "I would love that, Rachel." She said softly.
The two sat in a comfortable silence, both enjoying the warm sunshine on their skin. Rachel noticed Quinn was still holding onto her hand and smiled to herself. She felt her eyelids flutter as the warm afternoon slowly lulled her to sleep.
"I need to tell you something, Rach." The blonde said, suddenly sitting up, causing Rachel to open her eyes. "And if I don't say it now, I don't know if I ever will, I -
Quinn was cut off by the shrill sound of Rachel's phone ringing.
"Hold that thought." Rachel said. "I just need to make sure it isn't Shelby." She reached for her phone and scrunched her eyebrows in confusion at the unknown number flashing across the screen. "Hello?"
"An inmate from the Ohio State Penitentiary is attempting to contact you. To accept this call, please press one."
…
A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the short chapter. Keep an eye out for a longer update next week!! Please let me know what you think!