Yooooooo…..

Let's just ignore the fact that it's been months.

Disclaimer: We do not own Jessie.

Chapter 6: Night After

The Ross house is quiet, which would be expected at 6 a.m.

The darkness that consumed the penthouse due to the night begin to fade as hints of sunlight start to peek over the horizon, painting the once black sky with beautiful shades of pink, orange, yellow, and red. The pre-sunrise light slightly illuminates the penthouse, peeking through the balcony and the windows surrounding the home. Soon, the sun will fully ascend, casting endless light throughout the house. When this happens, it will be the official start of a new day.

As light begins to shine into the house, everything remains quiet, peaceful, and still.

Until Ravi abruptly sits up in bed.

Ravi is suddenly jolted out of his sleep. He's breathing heavily, gasping loudly every time he inhales. His eyes bulge out of their sockets as if he were frightened. He's shaking, and can actually see his whole arm vibrating, from his shoulder to the tips of his fingers. His heart is racing a million miles a minute and he's drenched in cold sweat.

And he has no idea why.

Ravi can't remember a single detail about the dream (or more likely nightmare) that scared him out of his sleep. He closes his eyes tight trying to grasp on anything that could help him remember, but he came up with nothing. He's not even sure if he really dreamed of anything. All he remembers is becoming drowsy while browsing the internet, and then nothing.

Maybe it was another panic/anxiety attack that woke him up.

Ravi closes his eyes. He takes a deep breath in and slowly lets it out. He does this a few times until his heart stops pounding and his not shaking anymore. It takes about a minute for him to fully calm down, but he finally does. Whatever it was, it's over, he thinks to himself.

As he runs a hand through his now wet and messy hair, Ravi glances at the clock next to him. 5:58 a.m. He doesn't have to wake up until 7:00, but he's almost certain he won't be able to go back to sleep now.

He shifts himself so he can get out of bed, but stops when he realizes the bed sheets his on aren't his. He furrows his brows in confusion. Since when did I like basketball? He thinks to himself as he runs his hand over the soft fabric of the sheet. His eyes follow his hand as it moves across the material until the land on Luke's sleeping body next to him. Oh yeah, he thinks to himself as he begins to remember where he was.

He spots Luke's laptop lying wide open on the bed, the screen black. He quickly closes the lid, remembering how focused he and Luke were the night before, searching the internet long and hard and taking notes as they go along. They had been working so hard that they lost track of time and probably knocked out at around 2 or 3 o'clock. And during that whole time, Ravi didn't think once about therapy or anxiety attacks or being misplaced in the world or cutting himself or suicide. For once, he seemed to have a slight escape from himself, and put all of his focus into something he enjoyed doing.

But now it's hours later. The concentration Ravi had while he was working with Luke is long gone, leaving his mind empty and just waiting to embrace the coldness of his dark room with open arms. He could almost physically feel how cold and hallow it is in there. It made him shiver.

Shaking his head in an attempt to rid his mind of any thinking, Ravi slides out of Luke's bed and tip tops as quickly as possible out of Luke's room. He closes the door to Luke's room behind him, the door making a soft click. He stands there in the darkness of the hallway for a minute. Though the sun has started to rise, there isn't a window in this hallway to chase away the darkness. So despite the current dawn, the hallway was consumed in darkness.

So Ravi stands in the dark hall. The darkness is so intense and so uninviting that Ravi can almost feel it starting to envelop him in its' sharp cold claws, and pulling him further in. He can feel it jabbing at him, taunting him, reminding him of who he knows he is and how he will never change; reminding him of how he'll always remain that useless boy lying in a pool of his own blood who nobody wanted. Who nobody cared about. It's as though he can feel every inch of darkness pinching and pulling at his skin, gripping him in a tight, unbreakable hold. It's as if the dark room in his mind has somehow magically found its' way out of his thoughts and virtualized itself right in front of him. He wonders to himself if this is what his dark room would physically feel like if it were real. It seems pretty accurate, right down to the feeling of him wanting to scream until his lungs bleed out, until he can't feel anything else and he's finally released from this hell.

The sound of someone's loud alarm clock snaps Ravi out of it. He closes his eyes and inhales before making his way to his room.

Once inside, he leans his back against the closed door and slides down to the floor. He cradles his bandaged arm, passing his fingers over the rough feeling of the gauze. It amazes Ravi how under these bandages are stitches keeping his torn skin in place, holding it closed until it can heal and hold itself closed. Until it is fixed.

It also amazes him how a few strokes of a blade against his skin could mean the difference between life and death; how that was all it took for him to cross that fine line between this world and whatever lay ahead in the next life; and how it almost ridded him of the harsh world around him. A world that constantly pushed him out, and begged for him to be gone.

Yet, that same incision could be fixed, and made into something stronger.

Ravi mechanically picks himself up off the floor and drags himself to the bathroom for a shower. The hot water from the shower head soothes this skin, relaxing his tensed and trembling muscles and causing him to lose himself in the mist and fog of the bathroom. He wonders if he can just stay in the shower all day, hiding away from the rest of the world in this foggy relaxation. He has to return to school today, and he's almost definitely certain that he's not ready to go back. He's not ready to face the rest of the world after what he did to himself, let alone his school. The news that Ravi Ross had been in the hospital after a failed suicide attempt must have circled the school three times by now. News like that didn't just go unnoticed. There is probably a line of people ready to make his life even more of a living hell, only now with more bait to use against him. Truth be told, he is legitimately scared. He's scared of what he will have to face at school.

Regardless of how scared he is, he can't tell anyone. Jessie and his parents have already been tremendously stressed over him, taking time out of the day to check on him, making sure he's okay, and reminding him that he's loved. They've been worrying about him so much. He doesn't want to add more to the worry and stress. Well, more than he already has anyway.

Ravi isn't sure how much time he's spent in the shower, but he knows he's wasted enough time mentally debating with himself when he stared at his shriveled up fingers and realized he still hasn't washed himself yet. He quickly grabs the soap and shampoo and get to work. He's extra careful when dealing with his left arm. Although the bandages are waterproof and will protect his arm while it heals, it hurts way more than he's letting anybody know. Even the slightest touch causes him immense pain.

The whole bathroom is fogged over by the time Ravi gets out of the shower. He grabs a towel, dries himself off a bit, and wraps it around his waist as he walks out of the heated bathroom. Once back in his room. He glances at his clock and realizes it's already 7:00. He's not sure how it could have possibly taken Ravi a whole hour to go from Luke's bed to his shower. But it did.

He must've spent like half an hour in that shower or something.

It doesn't really matter. He could spend all day in the shower and be content with that.

Ravi finishes drying himself and his hair before rolling on some deodorant and putting on clean clothes. He opts for some dark wash jeans and a black t-shirt, which was much different from his normal long sleeved shirts and hoodies. If it were up to him, he would go right back to wearing long sleeves, but the doctors told him it was best he give his wound a little breathing space (which was ironic since the whole thing was completely bandaged). He doesn't feel like being defiant and gives in to the doctor's orders.

Plus he's pretty sure someone in his family will tell on him if disobeys the doctor.

Once his shoes are tied and he's dressed, he quietly makes his way out of his room, shutting his bedroom door behind him. The light in the hallway had been turned on, finally giving light to the windowless space. He can hear his siblings bustling around in their rooms, rushing to get ready for the day. It seems as though he'll be the first one ready for breakfast. He wonders for a minute whether he should go back in his room and wait a few minutes for the rest of his family to get ready when the door to Luke's room opens and Luke appears, freshly showered and dressed. He almost jumps when he sees Ravi standing there, but then instantly smiles.

"Hey Ravi." Luke says, seeming oddly cheery for seven in the morning.

"Hey." Ravi breathes, stepping forward. "I didn't think you'd be ready so soon." Luke isn't one to wake up on time, or get ready on time, or be on time for school. So seeing him already up and going is pretty strange behavior for the teenage boy.

Luke shrugs and he steps away from his room door. "I kinda woke up thirty minutes early and couldn't fall asleep." He doesn't include the small detail that he woke up because a nightmare that probably could've caused his heart to stop. Or caused it to explode. Either one worked. "What about you? Why are you up so early?"

Ravi smirked. "I kinda woke up an hour early." Ravi also fails to tell Luke how a dream he doesn't even remember shocked him out of his sleep. Wouldn't the therapist just love to hear that.

Luke snorts. "Guess we're on the same boat, huh?" Ravi let's out a chuckle in agreement. The two stand there in an awkward silence, neither one willing to say anything to break it. Neither one knows what to say either.

Finally, Luke thinks of something to say. "You ready to go back to school?" He knows the question is risk and Ravi may shut him out and not answer, but he has to at least try to reach out to him.

Ravi shoves his hands into his back pockets as he contemplates how to answer Luke's question. No, he does not want to let his brother know that he's absolutely terrified of what he'll face, and that he's definitely not ready. So he just nods his head as he says, "Yeah, I'm ready." Ravi instantly feels guilty for lying to his brother about this. He feels so guilty that his nods turn into head shakes as he speaks. "No, I'm not. I'm honestly a little scared." An understatement but at least it isn't a full on lie.

"I understand." Luke says as he walks over to Ravi, wrapping his arm around the younger boys shoulders. "But you have Emma, Zuri, and I to help you out and keep away any idiot who tries to mess with you. Okay?" He squeezes Ravi's shoulder and gives him a hopeful look.

What Luke said doesn't do much to ease his mind or his building anxiety. But all Ravi can do is put on a brave face. He smiles and nods at his brother. "Yeah. Okay."

Think of this as a filler chapter.

Chapter 7 is already in the works. Should be uploaded before the end of the week. I hope people still read this even though it's been forever.

Thanks for reading.

If you like it review. If you like it review. If you like it, please review even though it's been a while.

-Bye Felicia.