Author's Note: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the source material for this story. All are owned by Rumiko Takahashi. This fic is labeled MA per standards for eventual violence, sex, and language so be warned.

PLEASE READ: I hate to do it to you, but I added a new middle section in Ch24 from Shippou's point of view. It was mentioned to me that I didn't address at all how she got better and how Shippou was dealing with her being so ill. Truthfully, I took that section out because I thought maybe it was too much. That section is sad AF so I took part of it out to spare you but I agree with my reviewer that it's needed to so I tucked it back in. Sorry in advance. It ain't any happier but I reference that section in this chapter.

...

Reconciliation

Chapter 25 – The Separation: Year 1: Spring: Part I

In Edo, early spring…

The new green of the grass-covered hill was still short and fragile. The wildflowers that would cover the hillside in a few more weeks were still sleeping and the forests surrounding the village were dotted with the pale green leaves of a new spring. A chilly breeze swept through, sending the newborn grass into motion, and Kagome shivered as she walked laboriously up the hill. Miroku, who was walking behind her, reached to unclasp his robe but she stopped him with a hand, knowing his intentions and tired of being fawned over.

"Don't. I'm fine." she said sternly, walking determinedly forward.

The monk sighed. "Kagome, you are not entirely well. The illness is gone, and some of your strength has returned, but you have a long time yet before you are recovered."

"Just leave it, okay? I'm not dying, it's just chilly."

Kagome couldn't deal with his overprotective need to smother her right now. She was concentrating on something else entirely. She took a few more steps forward and caught sight of their destination as the pair crested the hill. The ample sleeves of her white kosode fluttered in the breeze and, paired with the scarlet hakama, the robes of her profession hid her still slight frame as she faced down one of her biggest remaining fears.

'Breathe. Keep breathing.' she panted, mentally and physically.

"Kagome, if you are not ready…" came the cautious voice of Miroku from behind her, watching as her body grew tense.

"No," she shook her head, "I need to do this. I need to know."

She leaned her pale hands on the Bone Eater's Well and took in the mass of sealing sutras, frayed at the edges by the weather of the last six months. The power of the well was there but dormant. It felt ancient and cavernous, ready to swallow her whole. Kagome lifted her hands away from the cool wood and wondered why she had never been afraid of it before. The young miko could feel the energy shifting and swelling beneath her seals like the ocean at high tide trying to breach a cliff. The small strips of paper, painted with sacred words, had done their job.

But now that the worst of the nightmares had passed and she was rebuilding her fever-wracked body, Kagome wanted to see her Tokyo family. To face this last trial in her recovery. Her mother would understand that she was trying to overcome her grief, not just live through it, and Mariko Higurashi might be able to help her daughter find a new way forward. Her family here in Edo had seen her at her worst, and refused now to let her out of their sight or give her peace. She was grateful for their help but growing tired of their constant fussing and following.

"Very well." the monk nodded. "Then I will help you. Be careful."

"Afraid I'll hurt myself on the deadly paper?" she said sarcastically.

"You know as well as I that you do not yet have your strength back." he reminded her again. "I will pull the boards free. You break the sutras."

"Yes, O wise and controlling one." she said ruefully, sighing.

Miroku clenched his jaw and let it go. Kagome was healed in body but not in mind. The carefree, optimistic girl of three years ago had been replaced over the winter with an oft-bitter, sniping realist in the wake of her loss. It was not a change for the better. Now that the worst of the heartache might have passed, the miko filled the void left by love with condescension and sarcasm that was directed, indiscriminately, at nearly everyone around her. It was an overcorrection her friends would be happy to see fade away. For now, they surmised that Kagome had shuttered her once open and giving heart to protect the raw wounds she was still healing.

Today was a big step, though, and Sango had been pushing Kagome to visit the well since the weather warmed. Something had to change soon or the younger woman was going to find herself faced with the truth of her attitude and a harsh awakening, grief-stricken or not.

"Will she be surprised to see you?" Miroku asked, lifting the edges of the first boards with a grunt.

"Probably, given that she assumes every time I leave that that's the last time she'll ever see me." Kagome finished sadly.

"Take your time and do not return until you are satisfied. Shippou has gone back to school now so we should not expect him back until summer, correct?"

"That's usually how it goes, and he knows I'm going home for a while." Kagome sighed and her true nature peeked through the sorrow for a moment. "But keep an eye out for me, okay? I don't want him to feel like I'm leaving him. Even though I technically am. Again."

Kagome was quiet for a moment but then her deep, shuddering breath and heavy lean on the lip of the well was enough to cause Miroku to stop and walk around to her. He laid a large hand on her back and rubbed slow circles.

"You are not. You will never be well again until you see the ones who can help you the most."

Kagome flinched when he said it so easily. It was entirely her fault for making him, making them all, feel that way. In her mind, she vowed not to come back until she could admit to them openly how much they had helped, how dearly she had needed them, and how much she loved them all. Her true emotions were still caged behind a wall of grief and some other indefinable and unbreachable feeling. Maybe the key to unlocking her inner peace lay somewhere in her first home. She hoped it did because feeling hopeless was taking its toll.

"It's not that- You guys have been great. I'm-" she coughed and it brought tears to her eyes. "Sorry-" Miroku told her he understood, not to stress her lungs, but she shook her head and dove for his chest, hugging him tightly. "I'm so sorry I've been a mess. I can't stop feeling like this. Sometimes it feels like I'll never be me again. I can't- I just don't understand why I don't feel even a little bit like myself again."

Miroku hugged her back and rested his chin atop her head.

"We know. We all know. We all deal differently with loss. Yours is one of worst. Your mother will understand in a much more personal way that I can hope to. Perhaps this trip is what you need to find peace. I hope it is, Kagome." He cleared his throat and his voice took a more lighthearted tone. "Sango understands as well. We do hope that eventually you will see less of a need to use language like you do around the children but for now, you are allowed. But only for now."

Kagome barked a laugh and pulled away, wiping her eyes.

"I'm so sorry. I'll teach them better words when I'm better."

"My wife, in particular, would appreciate that. Now come on. Let's get you home."

And they both got back to work.

"Besides," Kagome arched an eyebrow, "you have my one-man army to keep you company while I'm gone."

"That is a question I still need answered. Remind me once again why Sesshoumaru-sama sent a soldier of the Western army here to stay indefinitely in your house?"

"Oh, Inaba's not that bad. He's nice. And very quiet." Kagome shrugged. "But I told you about the assassin that came after me while I was there?" Miroku nodded. "Sesshoumaru thinks that they were only after me but still doesn't know who sent them. If another comes here looking for me, you'll be glad he's here. I've watched the Western soldiers training and they're definitely capable enough. Not that you two aren't scary enough on your own."

It wasn't all a lie. Sesshoumaru didn't know who sent the assassin. The soldier was here to guard the village from anyone who might attack, but he was also here to report back to his Lord should someone from the North come sniffing around while Kagome was still in Edo. Inaba and Sesshoumaru also knew that Kagome was leaving for her family home and would be absent for some time, but neither needed to know where she was going. Kagome planned to keep it that way until she could discuss her origins with Sesshoumaru personally if, or when, the time came.

Miroku and Sango didn't know about her impending return to the West yet, either. She wasn't ashamed of her promise to keep Rin alive but neither was she ready to face the many questions they were sure to have. The West and her days there were still wrapped up tightly with her grief. Kagome hoped some time away with her mother, brother, and grandfather would be enough to heal her heart and give her some strength to talk it over with them.

The secrets were piling up, Kagome lamented, and sooner or later everyone would need to know everything. Just not yet. Miroku broke her mental guilt trip with an observation.

"It seems terribly out of character for the Lord of the West to care what happens in our village." Miroku wondered.

"Inuyasha was here." she shrugged. "He never needed to worry about its safety before. Now that's he's gone, and Inuyasha made Sesshoumaru promise to keep the village safe, Inaba is the answer." she said easily, surprised at how true it was. "Aside from that, he's different than we all realized. Sesshoumaru, I mean." she finished curiously.

She had learned so much more about him. Kagome understood a fraction more about him now that time and distance had given her brain license to sort through all the new discoveries. This version of Sesshoumaru she was beginning to understand.

His loss, so much like hers, had broken him.

His father's madness had hardened him.

His mother's grief had matured him.

And Inuyasha's death had enlightened him.

He was much more than she realized. But who would he be with her? Who would she be with him? Who could she be? So many questions and no answers. He had said he would consider visiting when Rin came for the summer but to what end? How was she supposed to act around a man she was permanently bound to while still mourning the loss of her husband?

Five hundred years in the future, the Sesshoumaru she had met at her family home was much different: more calculating, surprisingly sociable, and decidedly less honest. Would that Sesshoumaru continue to feign interest in her family shrine now that the damage was done? Would he show his face to her again, knowing he had intentionally misled them both? Her anger began to rise and her heart pounded at the idea of meeting him again. Miroku nearly caused her to jump when he continued and broke her train of thought.

"You are right. He did seem oddly somber and reflective when he came here the first time. Perhaps, the battle to defeat Naraku made comrades of us all." the monk said hopefully.

"Or something like that." Kagome said quietly, not ready to discuss Sesshoumaru openly just yet. "There. That's the last one."

"Here as well." Miroku tossed the last board to the side and brushed the splinters from his staff. "Take your time. There is no rush."

Kagome nodded, feeling the power begin to swell within the well.

Too much power and much too quickly.

"Oh no…"

It bubbled up from within, a sky-blue cascade of energy overflowing from the depths in glowing tendrils. Kagome was overwhelmed instantly, feeling the dizzying pull of the time shift as several of the coils wrapped around her, pulling her forward and into the well. Her hands grabbed for the edge but she lost her grip and was dragged down.

'This is just like the first time! I'm not ready!'

She was gasping at the sensation of falling and felt her chest and eyes burn with fear.

"No!"

"Kagome!" Miroku called, running back around the well to pull her back up.

"Miroku! No!" she yelled from the depths, a pale hand outstretched and then suddenly engulfed in light and hidden from him completely.

His hand met empty air as he tried to grab her and in the same instant, the light was gone and Kagome was gone with it.

"Damn it!" he swore, banging his open palm on the lip of the well.

…

Another day, more guard duty. As much as Shippou was ready for Kagome to return, this sitting in the dark wellhouse day after day had to stop soon. Maybe he could convince Sesshoumaru to take a day… No, it wouldn't work for her to meet him first. They agreed on that much at least. His musings were cut short when power filtered through the wellhouse, rising from the damp ground at the bottom and raising the hair on Shippou's neck. The first few crackling and staticky arcs of power skittering across the railing were a foreshock. A phone was whipped out of a pocket as the light grew from within.

"She's coming back! The well's reopened and it's working. No, no, she's not here yet- Wait." The familiar scents of wood ashes, camelias, the sharp tang of vinegar, and the sting of reiki exploded from the well. "Shit. Yes, she is. Call you when you're clear, Pop. Yes, fuck, I know! It slipped out! Give it up, old man!"

Shippou jammed the device back into his pocket and leaned over the well. The power was billowing upward, causing his small red ponytail to flutter behind him and he shielded his eyes with a forearm against the intensity of it. Her scent was growing stronger, blown throughout the wellhouse with the force of the energy rising from the well. His heart pounded for the first time in decades. His mother, the one he truly remembered, was returning to the present.

Finally, the blue light began to dim and the well house quieted. All except for the moaning cries of Kagome, his mother, collapsed at the bottom of the well.

"I wasn't ready!" came her broken voice. "I thought I was but I'm not. Take me back! Oh gods, what have I done? Take me back!" she wept quietly in the dark and dirty well.

"Here we go…" Shippou whispered to himself, the weight of his new responsibility finally sinking in.

The grown kitsune kicked his denim covered legs over the side and dropped, landing neatly next to her in a low crouch. She screamed and backed away against the dusty wall.

"Get away from me!" Kagome screamed, raising her fists. "Leave me alone and get out of here right now! Help!"

She knew yelling did nothing. It might be midday, but no one would hear her out here at the bottom of the well. The stranger was rising slowly from his crouch across from her and she couldn't make out anything specific about him in the pitch dark of the well. Her heart hammered in her chest and adrenaline kicked it. She'd give him hell for as long as she could.

"It's okay, Kagome. I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to help you." came a smooth, adult, male voice.

Shippou help up placating hands in front of him and Kagome tried to look him up and down with her human eyes in the near pitch-dark, assessing the danger with an angry and tear-stained face.

"I bet you are, asshole. I don't need help. I have nothing you could possibly want. Please… please just go away." she whispered, backing against the wall.

"I'm not here to hurt you. Here, this might help. Just don't scream, okay? Oh no, shit, that's not what I meant. I'm not gonna touch you. Just watch, okay? That's not better… Oh, screw it!"

He'd had five whole centuries to think about this moment and just royally fucked it up.

Kagome watched as the man's outline began to shiver at the edges into something… else. Youki flooded the well. Kagome gasped. There was a demon in the wellhouse!

'Why now? I just want to go home! Who the hell…?'

"Wait…" Kagome marveled, grinning madly and recognizing the stranger's youki without a doubt. Her relief was instant. "Oh, thank the kami…"

Shippou smiled and closed his eyes as he transformed. Fuck that glamour. He hated every minute of it.

The blue flame of his foxfire was edged with gold and framed his body as the outpouring of youki melted the concealing spell away. A billowing tail crept upward from behind him, peeling apart into six smaller burnt amber tails, and he shifted the shape of only his legs to those of a fox to further help her understand. His fangs appeared and the dull brown of his eyes glowed to reveal a mischievous and knowing emerald green. Choppy, auburn bangs hung nearly to his nose and he removed the elastic from his hair, letting the dark brown melt away to its natural, bright red mass with a shake. It hung to his shoulders and framed a mature and handsomely angular face.

When his aura quieted and the world at the bottom of the well was dark again, she chanced an orb of reiki to light the space and took a small step away from the wall. The young man took the chance to open his striking green eyes and smile down at her. They twinkled with love and happiness in the pale blue light of her orb. Kagome felt her heart flutter and her eyes burn.

Her son was still alive.

"Shippou? Is that really you?"

The older Shippou nodded, untrusting of his own voice. He swallowed twice and then took a small step forward.

"Hi, Momma." he grinned down at her.

And his cocky little smile looked so much like Inuyasha's, she sobbed with happiness and reached forward to lay a palm to his cheek. Kagome brushed her thumb over his cheekbone and smiled. He leaned into her hand and closed his eyes, just feeling her. When he opened them again, Kagome took another step forward and her hand left his cheek to travel over to his shoulder, squeezing it just slightly. He looked back into her watery, sapphire eyes with a question and she nodded.

Permission given, he curled himself around her in the span of a breath, arms embracing her slight waist and a palm at her back, tucking his head into her neck and inhaling deeply. If Kagome was confused at his desperate and intimate hug, she did not comment but let him embrace her as long he needed, hugging him back.

"I've missed you." he breathed, embracing her just that much tighter. "So much."

He inhaled her unique and calming scent even deeper just to make sure she was real. Her hands felt so cold, laid against his back over his black t-shirt, and he had forgotten how thin she had become before he'd left for school that year. She was not well. Shippou pulled away, forced himself to release her with his eyes squeezed shut, but brushed his cheek against hers as he stood, as he'd done a million times before. The feeling of her chilled and gaunt face nearly killed him.

"I'm here, honey. I'm not all here yet but I'll get there."

In his excitement to see her, he had nearly forgotten where she was in the timeline of things. For her, this was still the hard part and she was retreating into herself under the pressure of dealing with so many changes and so many unknowns at once. For him, it was the first time he'd seen her alive in nearly five centuries and he drank her in, sadness or no.

"It's okay, Momma. I know it's been hard. I'm sorry I wasn't around the last time you were here, or any of the times before that but we didn't want to draw attention to the shrine in any way."

He cradled her close again, and she let him, but worry began to gnaw at her over his reaction. He wasn't just happy to see her. He was cherishing her.

"Why-" she started but he held up a hand.

"I know you have a ton of questions, and I promise I'll answer them all, but you need to go inside and see your mom first. She's been worried about you and you need her."

She took both of his hands in hers and locked eyes with him.

"I need you, too. I needed you back then. I- I couldn't see- You saved my life, Ship. I hope you know that. I know I told you back then, before you left, but I want you- this you- to hear it, too. Before anything else happens."

"I remember." His eyes softened. "We need each other, Momma, and that's as true now as it is- was then. This is still weird." he chuckled, palming the back of his head.

'So much like Inuyasha.' she mused, happy Shippou had picked up something from him other than a foul mouth and impatience.

"Can I help you out of here?" Shippou asked.

"Yes, please. I could try that old ladder but I'm pretty sure I've had it for today. Miroku would be proud of me for- ahem- knowing my limits."

Her imitation of his scholarly tone was poor but Shippou appreciated it anyway and laughed. Scooping her up, the grown fox jumped easily from the bottom of the well to the deck above. He set her down gently, watching for signs of weakness and steadying her with a clawed hand. She was instantly focused on the modest, two-story house past the short pathway from the shed. His mother took a deep breath and then looked him over in the sunlight.

"This- this is weird, right?" Kagome breathed, looking back up at him with smiling eyes.

"Very, but we can be together now whenever you come back. It was- We couldn't see you before. The timing was wrong."

"'We?' You mean you and Sesshoumaru? Are there others?" Kagome asked, sliding the wellhouse doors open.

"Yeah, a few you might know already. I know Sesshoumaru met you last time. I was pissed he wouldn't let me come, too, but he knows that he's doing."

Kagome stiffened at the mention of the daiyoukai but continued on.

"And you'll be here whenever I come back now?"

"Yep." came his quiet answer, looking away from her and across the path to the house with sadness in his eyes. Shippou looked back over at her after a second and smiled again. "Shall we?"

Kagome nodded. Shippou frowned and closed his eyes, letting his glamour slip back into place, then faced her with a rueful smile.

"I miss your eyes already." she giggled, trying to set him at ease. "Once they all know who you are, you won't have to hide anymore while you're here. Are you coming in?"

"That's up to you. You can tell her whatever you want to about me but seeing you like this and meeting me at the same time might be a bit much."

"I can see why. You are a lot now. Six tails, my little prodigy? What would Chi-chan say?" Kagome smiled, starting down the steps. "And you can transform! When did that happen?"

"I can. I'll tell you all about it later. And Chinatsu-sensei knows. She's still around." Shippou smiled warmly. "Still causing trouble."

"Of course, she is." Kagome said sarcastically. "Why wouldn't she be? Are any of your other friends still nearby?"

"One or two but most of them moved to the States. It's way more fun for kitsune. Their way of life over there is just naturally much more… wild. We don't stand out much by comparison." he laughed.

"If you say so." Kagome shrugged. "Come in and meet them. My family. I can introduce you to the other most important people in my life." She laid a hand on his warm shoulder and he returned her smile. "I'm so happy to see you, Shippou."

"You, too."

He took her small hand in his and they walked the short distance from the well to her house enjoying each other's company. Somehow, he had worked his usual Shippou magic and smoothed over her panic and grief at being ripped away from the past. He would have to work much harder to keep distracting her from the truth of the present, too.

…

A knock echoed in the small living room where Mariko Higurashi sat reading a newspaper with a cup of tea. The morning's chores were done and she could spare a few moments to catch up with the world.

"Who could that be?" she wondered, rising from her seat and padding over to the door.

"Yes?" Kagome's mother asked guardedly, taking in the scene of a thin woman with dull, black hair and a tall, young man with light brown hair standing just behind her. Wait, the young woman was familiar…

"Kagome?!"

"Hi, Momma. I'm home." she said weakly, trying a smile.

"What's wrong, honey?" Her mother pressed a hand to her daughter's forehead and saw the gaunt look of her cheeks. Mariko peered around the new young man and out into the yard, craning her neck. "Where's Inuyasha? Did he not come with you?"

Shippou flinched. Kagome felt her eyes burn but tried to keep her face still so she could squeeze out the truth to the woman who had raised her.

"He- um," she swallowed, lip quivering, "he died. About five months ago."

"Oh Kagome, no. I'm so sorry."

Mariko hugged her daughter close and felt how thin she was. What had happened to them? And who was the young man standing sadly behind her?

"Come in, come in. Sit down here on the couch and you can tell me everything. Starting with who that grown man is that I'm letting into my house and why he's shadowing my daughter's every step." she threw over her shoulder with a cautious look, settling Kagome into a warm blanket and shifting pillows around.

Shippou froze, remembering he was, in fact, a strange, grown man inviting himself into her home as far as Mrs. Higurashi was concerned.

Mariko's tone was guarded, mentally rifling through her daughter's history for a clue, but coming up with no one in Kagome's history that matched his description. Her eyes narrowed on the new face and she waited for an explanation. Kagome beat him to it.

"Momma, this is Shippou. Your grandson."

Mariko gasped and Kagome snuggled deeper into the couch, leaning heavily into the back and hugging a blanket close, relishing the smell of home after so long. She felt some tension in her heart ease just slightly. Nothing soothes a soul like the scent of "mom laundry."

"Shippou? Grandson?! You and Inuyasha- Did you-"

"No, ma'am. I'm adopted." the young man said quickly, bowing respectfully in the entryway, before more questions could further upset his mother.

"Not that it matters." Kagome felt the need to say, looking sideways up from the sofa and giving him a tired smile.

"I know." Shippou smiled back.

Peace crept into his heart for the first time in over a century. There she was. Safe and alive and smiling just for him. Gods, he'd missed her.

…

Several hours later, hours filled with meals and tears and explanations, Shippou walked out of the Higurashi home without the concealing spell and far enough away to make a phone call without attracting attention. It rang once and was picked up immediately.

"You are still there?"

"Yeah. She's sleeping now."

"And she is well?"

"Not 'well' exactly but she's over the worst effects of the fever. She really doesn't look good though. I don't remember it being quite this bad. I know there were a few weeks where we nearly lost her but then I thought I remembered her being better from then on."

"You were young. It is likely they kept much of the truth from you to spare you."

"Maybe. She smells like Sango and Miroku and Kaede. I didn't count on that. It… Well, it hurts."

"Enjoy their memories. Do not feel guilty for relishing the past. They were your family, as well."

"Thanks."

The silence was painful for them both. This was awkward and painful and Shippou knew it wouldn't go well if the daiyoukai pushed Kagome too far too soon.

"Give her another day or so, Sesshoumaru. She's exhausted and overwhelmed."

"She has said nothing?"

"Not yet. Mariko took her upstairs, got her cleaned up, and put her to bed. I didn't get to see her again. What should I tell her mother?"

"The bare minimum. Who you are, that you wish to stay near her as she recovers. If the miko tells more than that to her mother, it cannot be helped. Kagome does not know the danger yet. Do not mention my true identity or the past yet. Her mother still believes I am only a benefactor and an acquaintance. And certainly, don't mention the-"

"Yeah, I know. No need to freak her out."

"You are staying the night?"

"Yeah, I've got her. Don't worry. I won't let anything happen."

"Stay vigilant. Call me if you need something brought to you. Do not leave her. You have your swords?"

"Yeah. They're concealed. And I won't. I know. I'll try to talk to her tomorrow. See how she feels."

"I will wait another day but no longer. I cannot."

"I know, Pop." Shippou said sadly. "I'll do my best to help her understand."

"Fox, if I must remind you one more time-"

Shippou groaned. "You know, I could've tried 'Daddy' or something equally gross. 'Pop' is tame comparatively."

"Neither is preferable. I offered 'Father' in your youth and you refused."

"'Father' is reserved for the elderly, Sesshoumaru. I still refuse."

"Then this discussion is over. Again. Call me when she wakes. And Shippou?"

"Hm?"

"Make her understand."

"I'll try… Pop." he said quickly with a devilish grin, pressing the 'End' button and dropping the phone back in his pocket. He'd pay for that later, he knew, but Sesshoumaru wouldn't really mean it. Squabbling was how they bonded and that wasn't changing anytime soon.

Shippou felt lighter. The back-and-forth was trite but soothed their mutual nerves over the situation. Five hundred years was a long time to plan and now that she was here, and the worst was over, it was time to figure out where to begin again.

The matured kitsune fingered the two identical twin sword charms hanging at his throat on a delicate silver chain, and stared up at the dark window on the second floor. Fate had asked too much of Kagome once, but with some help this time, maybe she'd survive. They had to try.

…

The next morning, Kagome's sapphire eyes adjusted slowly and heavily to the early morning light coming through her bedroom window. Groggy from the many, many hours of uninterrupted sleep she had gotten, Kagome sat up, bracing herself upright with both arms and looking around.

She spent a few minutes taking in the flamboyantly pink bedroom of her youth and smiled. Why her mother had never changed this gaudy collection of childish things, she'd never understand but at the moment, Kagome was grateful. This room was full of memories of her childhood. From a time before demons, reiki, bow and arrow, and responsibilities she hadn't been ready for or fully understood. This was a room of innocence and safety.

She remembered last night, too. Recounting to her mother the tale of Inuyasha's death, some of her stay in the West with Sesshoumaru, and coming back to Edo to recover only to get sick. She left out her promise to Mate Sesshoumaru in two years' time, and that she had nearly died during each one of those three major events. Her mother had been understanding, offering the love and acceptance Kagome needed more than anything else. Afterward, Mariko helped Kagome bathe, brought her something to eat, and tucked her into bed for the rest of the evening. Sleep, she had said, was what her daughter needed most right now. Everything else came later but her health was the first hurdle.

Kagome pushed herself up and kicked her feet over the edge of the bed, thinking and staring at a circle of the plush carpet that was slightly faded and worn. Inuyasha had slept here a few times. On the floor, right beneath her feet. Her mother had never known, of course. It had only been when things had gotten really bad. They had needed each other for comfort, even if neither was willing to admit it yet.

When they stayed here as a married couple for the first and last time, her mother had forced him to sleep on the couch downstairs.

"Married or not, I'm not ready for you to sleep in the same room yet, you two. Not unless Inuyasha is ready to explain the facts of life to your brother without any help from me." Mariko cocked an eyebrow and both of them had sputtered their denial with red-stained faces. "That's what I thought. Now get ready for bed and I'll see you in the morning." she'd finished with a smile.

Inuyasha had refused to try anything after that and dutifully slept on the couch, kissing her goodnight with a longing and defeated look. Kagome smiled at the memory, and then chuckled just once at finally being able to smile over a memory of him. In a big way, being here was already soothing her heart. Separation from everything that had been "theirs" to a place that was mostly "hers" felt right.

Time to get ready for the day. Freshly showered and dressed comfortably in an ivory sweater and jeans, Kagome walked carefully down the stairs. Her legs were still weak and she knew it. No sense in trying to be brave or strong when it was only stairs. Near the bottom, Kagome heard her mother's laughter and another voice she was still only vaguely familiar with.

"Good morning, honey. Did you sleep well? Do you want some breakfast?" her mother chirped, brushing the bangs from Kagome's eyes and looking her over.

"Yes, thank you. I feel… okay this morning. Lighter. I thought about him this morning and I actually smiled. That's new."

"I'm so glad to hear it." her mother smiled, walking around the table to lay a hand on her daughter's cheek. "But take it easy today. No shrine duties for you for a few days at least. Tea and books and naps. Then we'll see where you are."

"I'm still here, too!" said Shippou happily from his place on the couch with a steaming mug.

Kagome startled and whipped her head around.

"Good morning, Momma." he waved cheerfully. The sleeve of his yukata slid down his raised arm and Kagome recognized it as one of her father's. The bold pattern of wide vertical gold stripes on dark blue suited him and her heart warmed seeing her son in his grandfather's clothes. Almost as if they were still connected despite never meeting.

"So you are! I thought maybe I'd dreamed it."

"Nope. You're stuck with me now. I haven't seen you in a long time and we have a lot to talk about."

"As long as it isn't about Sesshoumaru, I'm game." she said, crossing her arms and raising her chin.

"Ouch. Diving right in, huh?"

"I said what I said. I have enough to sort through without adding him to the mix."

"Fair enough. There's plenty to work through without him, I know, but you need to eat and I have work to do."

"Work? What do you do?"

"Not work work. We'll get to that later but for now, my job is cleaning up the grounds. Right, Grandma?" He leaned around to catch Mariko's eye.

"That's right, sweetie. I'm not going to let a strong young man sit idle while this place falls apart. You stay, you work. Don't forget your disguise if we have visitors, sweetheart." Mariko said, turning back around to finish Kagome's eggs.

"Yes, ma'am." Shippou agreed.

He got up and stretched then started for the door, cinching his hair back with both hands as he walked outside and flashing Kagome a fanged grin around his hairband before shutting the door.

"He's very kind. You raised that one right, Kagome. Well done."

"I get the distinct feeling it wasn't just me…" the young woman said thoughtfully, watching him jog across the courtyard through the kitchen window with the grace of a warrior, not the haphazard run of an office grunt. Her heart clenched a little at the thought.

"What?" her mother asked, setting down dishes of eggs, rice, and a few more things Kagome knew she couldn't finish.

"Nothing. This looks wonderful, mom. Thank you."

"I'm so glad you're back, honey. I'm sorry for why, and I wish you had come home before now, but I'm glad you want to be here to heal. I didn't ask yesterday, but are you staying? Permanently?"

The hope in her mother's voice made Kagome wish she could give Mariko the answer she wanted, but her life was more complicated than that.

"No, I can't stay here forever. I have duties and the much younger version of Shippou to look after back there. Sango and Miroku would watch over him if I asked them to, but I love him and I need to be there. I'm sorry."

"I understand needing to take care of your children, Kagome. That's what I'm trying to do right now."

"I learned from the best." Kagome smiled.

"I'm sorry you can't stay but I understand. Just promise me you'll try to visit as often as you can?"

"Of course, I will."

After some breakfast and some more easy conversation, Kagome learned that Souta was away at a four-day soccer camp and Grandpa was staying with some friends further south to avoid the last of the cold weather for the sake of his arthritis. Jii-chan wouldn't be back in time to see her unless she stayed for a month or more. She knew she wouldn't be here that long, whatever she was feeling. Her duties couldn't wait forever and Kaede would be exhausted by the close of spring. Kagome resolved to write him a letter relaying how sorry she was to have missed him.

Kagome read, paced, slept through the middle of the day, and then caught sight of Shippou outside near the steps, lifting a several-hundred-pound, stone lantern over one shoulder to straighten the base with his foot.

'That youkai strength is no joke…' she mused.

"I'm going outside for a while, Mom!" Kagome called from the entryway.

"Okay, dear. Take a jacket and be careful!"

"Got it."

A pale blue, fluffy down jacket and ivory knit hat joined her outfit and Kagome stepped outside, breathing in a deep lungful of the fresh air. It didn't have the wild and loamy smell of the countryside she was used to but the traces of car exhaust wafting up from the road below smelled like home in a different way. Kagome slowly walked across the grounds and realized "home" was a fluid concept for her right now.

The shrine had been her home as a child. It was still technically "home" through her quest to piece the jewel back together. Her friends and wherever they camped was home during their journey. Then her home was the house Inuyasha had built for them prior to getting married. When she returned to Sengoku, Kagome resolved to live there again. The weather would be warmer and Shippou would be coming home for a few weeks during the summer. He would be relieved to see her healthy enough to stay there by herself. That was one more item off of her get-better list.

In the next breath, she realized, in another year and a half, the Western Palace would be their home. Kagome felt the nerves rise and shook her head.

'Nope. Not ready to sort through all that yet.' she thought quickly.

"Your face is gonna stick like that." Shippou called from a few steps away. "Isn't that what you used to tell me?" he asked with a grin from across the stone path, hefting another stone lantern over one shoulder to reposition it, too.

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess I do. Been a long time since I would have, huh?"

"But you wouldn't anyway because I'm grown, right?"

"Shippou-" she started sadly.

He loudly set the lantern down on its pedestal, cutting her off, and continued straightening it. She let his attempt at distraction go unchallenged. Apparently, they all had a lot to talk about but the subject of his regret was off limits.

"So, what are you gonna do today?" he asked.

"Walk. Talk to you guys. Sleep some more. I need to just… take it easy. I feel like a bum but I can't find the energy to do much else. I feel like I've been laying down, doing nothing, for months. I'm ready to feel like myself again. Ready to work and travel and be a person again."

"You were sick. You've been through a lot. It's okay."

They settled into comfortable silence while he swept another few feet of the walkway, working his way towards the steps. Kagome took a place on a cold, concrete bench nearby and laid back to feel the sun. The contrast of the cold stone and the warm sunshine made her feel at peace.

"I feel so much better knowing you're still alive, you know. I wish I'd known sooner. You look so grown up. I missed the big stuff, right? Transformation and new levels. I'm sure I wasn't around to see you become even half of the adult you are now."

"Kagome, there's a lot you missed, sure, but you were- are irreplaceable. You gave me something as a child I never thought I'd have again. Love and acceptance, even if it came with scolding and teaching. A mother. Do you understand yet how rare that is for youkai?"

"I'm learning." she nodded. "I can't see why though. You were a child in need of a mother and I wanted to make sure you grew up feeling loved. It's not a hard concept to understand."

"It isn't for you, and that's what matters. Besides, there wasn't a good time for you to meet me like this." Shippou said. "We didn't have the relationship back then like we do now. I mean, you and I were close but we're much more like mother and son now in the past, thanks to our first stay with Sesshoumaru. None of us knew how tightly bound we were until about now in your timeline."

She didn't miss it. 'Us.'

"So, you and Sesshoumaru are close?"

A red eyebrow raised in her direction. "I thought you didn't want to talk about him."

"I don't." She closed her eyes, feeling the warmth seeping into her exposed face, and sighed. "Not specifically. I want to know that you've been cared for and not beaten mercilessly every day for the last several centuries."

"I've been cared for." Shippou considered how best to talk her into seeing him. "Don't be too hard on him, Momma."

She sat up with an incredulous look. "Why? He's done nothing but deceive me and give me half the facts."

"Do you trust me?" the grown kitsune said, resting both hands atop the broom handle and faced her.

"Of course, I do. Then and now."

"Then trust me when I tell you he's doing his best."

Shippou dropped the broom and sat down next to her. Once he was settled, she leaned into his warmth and stayed there. He slung an arm around her, rubbing her arm to warm her up faster.

"He's got a lot to answer for, Ship. Why couldn't just tell us what was going to happen? He chose not to tell us for some reason that I'm sure is good enough for him. It's his M.O. Lying by omission."

"There's some truth to that, but trust me some more when I tell you he's paid for his mistakes. He's still paying. He'll tell you more when you're ready to see him but he promised not to come until you gave the all clear."

"He's gonna be waiting a long fucking time then."

"Momma! Language." he grinned over at her.

"You're too old for me to care about that anymore. You never really cared what I said about it anyway."

"Damn straight."

He laughed when she punched his arm lightly. He rubbed it with his hand, feigning real hurt and Kagome laughed with him. He'd missed that sound. Her joy. Shippou sighed, regretting turning the conversation serious again but it had to be done. He promised he'd try.

"Have you thought at all about Sesshoumaru feels right now?"

Her eyes hardened again and she looked over at him with her mouth set in a thin line.

"Are you defending your adopted father's killer?"

"He's my father, too, really. We have a weird family, I admit, but you agreed that Inuyasha's death was necessary. I know that. I'll never forget him and I know you won't either, but don't blame Sesshoumaru. He's really struggled with it, too."

"I haven't told the younger you everything. It's a little too much. You're still recovering, too. Now that you know everything, do you believe it was necessary?"

"I… didn't actually. Not until recently."

"What changed your mind?"

"Someone else like Inuyasha. Someone with abilities they couldn't control and no real solution. I had no idea until we lost them, too. She took three of her siblings with her and nearly got her mother. There really is no cure for our baser nature."

"My head knows that; hopes it's the real truth anyway. My heart hasn't accepted it just yet. We saw so much. Sorcery and youki and abilities I never could have dreamed up. I just know there had to be something out there to help him. Sesshoumaru had the whole world to search and instead, decided to take the easy way out and use his brawn instead of his brain."

"He had the benefit of first hand experience. He knows what happens when the counter measures fail."

"You mean Touga?"

"Yeah. You know about that already?"

"Yeah. We had a heart to heart in the gallery before leaving the West. I'm not supposed to tell anyone about it so don't rat me out."

"I'm a fox, not a rat. Besides, I bet I know more than you do by now."

"I bet. Back to your original question: no, I haven't had the brain power to consider that he might be having a hard time, too. I've been too busy lying to my friends about marrying him in two years, and being gravely ill, and wondering when the hell…" She sighed. "No, I haven't."

"Well, he's had it rough and it's not getting any easier. He needs to talk to you, and I mean 'needs'. You might need him, too. Have you thought about that?"

"The fuck I do." she said angrily, then took a deep breath and calmed down. "Seeing him again just feels- I don't know… It's just- How am I supposed to look at him? Knowing what's going to happen but hasn't yet? This weird relationship we have is even weirder now because for him, I'm sure lots of things have happened between us that I don't know about. His place in the timeline with me is way different than mine with him."

"He's not gonna jump you, if that's what you're thinking. He's a little clueless sometimes but he's not suicidal."

"Furthest thing from my mind, Shippou! Kami in heaven! I didn't mean that, you pervert. What has he been teaching you?"

"Everything. Sesshoumaru had to have 'the talk' with me." Shippou waggled his eyebrows.

"Oh no… How awful was that?"

"Not at all actually. He's pretty wise."

"Oh, kami, I'm so sorry I wasn't around."

"Don't be. It's served me well."

"What does that mean?"

Shippou thought for a moment and then sighed, making a decision.

"That I'm Mated and settled and you should thank Sesshoumaru for being willing to explain."

Kagome gasped and smacked his chest.

"Shippou Higurashi! Why didn't you tell me sooner?!"

"Ow! There wasn't a good time and you getting better is much more important."

"Like hell! Is she- he? -they? Are they youkai?"

"Yes, she is." He held up a finger to her lips. "And before you go nuts, I can't tell you a whole lot more yet. I knew it'd make you happy though so I wanted to let you know I'm taken care of."

"Oh, that's just evil, Shippou. How long?"

Her son groaned. "Don't do this to me, Momma… One hundred and twenty… no, thirty-seven? She knows. I can't remember."

Kagome sucked in a breath through her teeth. "That looked painful."

He barked a laugh. "It's a long time. Maybe you'll get to meet her one day."

"I hope so. I guess I wouldn't have been around long enough before to meet her so I'll count that as a good thing about time travel."

"Yeah, that would be another good thing."

"What's the first good thing? Us seeing each other?"

"Yeah, that too but we have a chance to make things right. Sesshoumaru needs to be here when I tell you more. He's puzzled through the past to come up with a plan. We'll explain when we can all sit down together and talk."

"You're using my curiosity against me and it's working."

"Good. I was betting on it. You're part kitsune or I'll eat my tail."

"Please don't." Kagome giggled.

Then she looked up at the clear sky and thought for a few moments.

"You'll be here? If I let him come?"

"I'm not going anywhere until you decide to go back to the past. I promise. Wild horse youkai couldn't keep me away. Well, there aren't many of them left but you know what I mean."

"I do." Kagome sighed and stood from the bench.

The miko walked away from Shippou a few steps and paced up and down a small stretch of the gray cobbled pathway in her navy flats. He could smell everything rolling through her mind. The sweet but tangy yuzu of her nerves at seeing him again. Then the sharp vinegar from her fear and the ashen scent of her sadness. She wanted to know what he had to say but was afraid of the memories his presence would dredge up. She was just now feeling lighter. Sesshoumaru wouldn't help that. Then the scent Shippou had expected the most: the sizzling hot shishito pepper. The raw spice of her anger. It burned his nose, powerful and thick. That was the last scent he could make out before she planted a foot and faced him.

"Fine. Call his highness. He can come tonight after dinner."

"Are you sure? If I call him, he's coming. He's pretty nervous about seeing you but he's waited a long time to see this you."

"Let him be nervous. I'll meet him out here. He's not coming inside. He's not staying. I'll see him this once and then he has to leave me alone."

"I can't make any promises about that. You'll have to work that out between you two."

"Fine, but everything else stands. Make sure he knows it."

"Okay, if you're sure. For what it's worth, I don't think either of you is ready for this. A lot changes after you see each other."

"Do you want me to call it off or not?"

"No, ma'am. I'll let him know. Are you sure though?"

"Shippou…"

He shivered. There was a tone he didn't miss. But even her motherly consternation made his heart leap. He had missed her loving, emotional discipline in light of Sesshoumaru's logical, circular reasoning. His parents were very different beings.

"Ready. Got it. No more questions."

"Good boy."

...

AN: Sorry it took so long! I just couldn't be happy with it. I also didn't want to split it up but the second part of Spring 1 has to be just right. Next time, Kagome and Sesshoumaru meet!