Notes: As promised, here's the second Fluffy Fridays update of the day! This story was written for pirateherokillian for the CS Secret Santa this year! I hope all of you have a wonderful holiday season with your family and friends!
Killian woke with a gasp, taking a moment to let his heart rate return to normal. It had been a while since he'd had the dream, but when he did he woke absolutely bloody terrified.
Six months ago Emma had won the final battle, and the residents of Storybrooke had begun their happily ever afters. It had been good, so, so far beyond good since then. He and Emma had taken a two-week honeymoon on the Jolly. They'd had no real destination in mind; they'd merely chosen to sail somewhere warm and tropical. Two weeks of uninterrupted time together had been better than even his fertile imagination could have dreamed up.
When they'd returned home, they'd set up house and then begun the process of deciding just what they would do with the remainder of their lives (besides spending copious amounts of time in bed, of course. They were newly-weds, after all). When Dave had decided to pursue his life-long dream of owning a farm, the decision had been simple. Killian would take the position of Emma's deputy. Now he and Swan were partners in everything–life and work.
As he said, life was good.
But the fact that life was now as close to idyllic as it could get didn't erase the years and years of trauma they had all been through over the past few years, and for the first couple of months, Killian had the same nightmare nearly every night.
They were back there on the streets of Storybrooke, Swan facing Gideon and the final battle about to commence. He'd known what she was going to do a split second before she did it. She'd turned back toward him, agony and regret in her eyes. Before he even had time to scream in horror, she'd dropped her sword, letting Gideon run her through.
It was the only way to truly escape the trap the Black Fairy had set for them. The strategic part of Killian's brain knew that to be true. But his heart, a heart that had lost everyone it had ever loved, rejected the idea. He couldn't lose her, his true love, the best part of his very self, his beloved wife. Not now! Not ever.
He'd watched as Gideon's sword made contact, and Swan grunted in pain, falling to the ground. Her lad went to her, told her he loved her, kissed her.
And nothing happened.
Henry tried True Love's Kiss again. Still nothing.
Killian tried, kissing her until his lips were bruised. She remained still and dead.
He'd lost the most important person he'd ever had in his life, and he was sure the agony really would kill him.
Killian took a deep breath, shaking his head to clear the distressing images from his mind, and then turning onto his side, tears of relief coming into his eyes as his gaze took in the peacefully sleeping form of his wife.
She was here. She was alive. She was well. They'd gotten their happy beginning, and he need never fear the final battle again.
They'd been married long enough for Killian to know waking his sleeping Swan was a rather unwise proposition, but still he leaned over and softly caressed her cheek, pushing aside her tangled hair. He needed to touch her, needed to reassure himself that it was just a dream; that she was here and that she was well.
She was so beautiful, so vibrant. He leaned down and kissed her, softly, gently. She stirred at the touch of his lips to hers, smiling in her sleep and whispering his name. After a moment, she wrapped her arms around his neck and began kissing him back.
He'd feared she'd be angry at him for waking her, but it seemed she had another form of sweet torture for him instead. The fire built up inside of him as the kiss continued and Swan's hands began wandering. This wasn't necessarily how he'd planned to begin Christmas Eve morning, but Killian was so very far from complaining.
He'd only just reached for the hem of Emma's pajama top when her talking phone began blaring "Jingle Bells."
She groaned, reluctantly pulling her mouth from his.
"Ignore it, Love," he whispered, kissing down the column of her neck.
"Good plan," she responded in a far-from-steady voice as she pulled his mouth back to hers.
But the wretch on the other end of the phone seemed quite insistent. No sooner had the talking phone gone silent than it started up again.
Emma growled, rolling away from him to reach for the phone. "Sounds like they're not giving up. I better see what it is."
Emma tapped at the screen for a moment, and then barked. "What?"
She listened for a moment before rolling her eyes. "Just a second, Dad. Killian's here too. Let me put you on speaker."
A few more taps at the screen and then Dave's voice came through the speaker.
"Like I said to Emma, Killian, I'm really sorry for the interruption; I know I offered to cover the station so you two could have a couple days off, but we've got a bit of a situation here."
Killian sighed. They'd had six months of peace. He supposed it was the best run they could hope for. "Just what kind of situation?"
"Well," David said slowly. "I…don't know exactly how to describe it. I know it involves lots of birds."
"Birds?" Emma bit out. "Dad, you interrupted us because of birds? Isn't that more Mom's department?"
"She doesn't know what to make of it either. Besides, some of the birds don't seem to even speak English."
Emma shook her head. "I kind of hate that a sentence like that almost makes sense to me. Still, why are you bothering us for birds–no matter what language they speak?"
"It's not just the birds," David said. "There are other oddities. Women dancing, people playing instruments, men randomly jumping up and down, cows being milked. Full-grown trees suddenly appearing. I don't know what's going on, but it is truly bizarre, and you know how this town is. The usual suspects are already starting to freak out."
"I'm assuming Leroy has begun heralding the news?" Killian said.
David chuckled. "Obviously."
In the background, Killian could hear the dwarf himself yelling "The bagpipers! They're here!"
"Anyway," David said, "I've tried to calm everyone as best I can, but the rumor has already begun circulating that we're under attack. I wouldn't ask it unless I really thought it was necessary, but I really think I need back up."
Emma sighed again, pushing aside the covers and reaching for her jeans. "Alright Dad, we're on our way."
"Never a dull moment, is there, love?" Killian asked, climbing from his side of the bed….just as the sound of a full on drum line began playing outside their bedroom window.
"I think we need to go on the attack!" Leroy shouted from the back of city hall, as the impromptu town hall meeting began. "This is our town, and we need to defend it!"
Emma rolled her eyes–she'd been doing that so much already today that she feared she'd go blind. Just when she thought things in Storybrooke couldn't get weirder, something like this happened.
As she and Killian had driven into town, she could tell her dad hadn't been exaggerating. Everywhere she looked was something else out of place. Fully grown pear trees, each with a bird perched on one of it's limbs, blue birds with–if one could believe it–cell phones held to their heads. Hen's wearing berets and waving French flags. Groups of swans performing some sort of synchronized swimming routine in the harbor. Pairs of turtle doves nestled together, cooing sweet nothings in each other's ears. Geese lying around in the street.
And that was only the birds. As they neared the center of town, Emma began noticing the groups of people–people she'd never seen before–behaving in distinctly odd fashion. There were the maids milking, the men in three-piece suits playing leap-frog with each other and the scantily clad women (shouldn't they be freezing dressed like that in December?) seductively dancing to the music of a pipe and drum corp.
Right in the center of town, a set of five, huge golden hoops sat upon the ground.
("Stay away from the rings!" she heard someone shout. "Probably portals to some dystopian hellscape!")
Regina, as the newly reinstated mayor, had taken control, promptly calling a town meeting and magicing the word out to all the town's residents.
And so here they were, huddled together in town hall, trying desperately to make sense of…well, anything that was going on today.
Seriously, though. Couldn't whatever villain or whatever had done this have at least waited until after Christmas. Rude.
"Who precisely do you suggest we attack?" Regina asked with a sneer. "We don't even know what is going on, let alone who has perpetrated it."
"I might be able to answer that first question," Belle said, from her place in the back next to her husband and sleeping newborn.
"Yeah?" Emma asked. "What do you think is going on?"
Belle got to her feet and looked over at the assembled town. "Well, it's Christmas Eve, and we're seeing everything from partridges in pear trees to drummers drumming. Think about it! Every weird thing going on right now has something to do with one of the gifts from the Christmas song."
Emma groaned. Of course. Of course someone had decided to mess with them by sending the twelve days of Christmas.
"So who do we think's doing it?" Henry asked. "Can anyone think of a Christmas related villain that might want to attack us?"
Various suggestions were thrown out there–from Ebenezer Scrooge to the Grinch, to Mr. Potter from It's a Wonderful Life, but none seemed to quite fit the bill.
"Well, we aren't getting anywhere just speculating," Emma said. "If there is some kind of psycho Christmas villain going after us, we'll have to wait until they make another move. For the time being, it doesn't seem like any of the birds or….performers…are causing any harm. I guess just…don't panic."
"We've defeated much worse than eleven pipers piping!" Snow chirped up in a way-too cheery voice. "This town will get through it the way we get through everything! Together!"
The meeting had only just adjourned, when Emma's cell phone began ringing. She looked down and frowned. It was a long distance number. A very long distance number.
Emma curled up on the sofa, bringing her legs up beneath her and leaning into Killian's open arm. She chuckled as she brought her mug of cocoa to her lips and glanced over at their huge, brightly decorated Christmas tree.
"Did you see Leroy's face when that goose suddenly decided to stop lying around and started chasing him through the streets? I thought he was going to start screaming like a little girl."
Killian laughed, turning his head to give her a quick kiss on the forehead. It was one of her favorite things about being with Killian, all of the simple, casual signs of affection. "I'd pay an entire pouch full of doubloons for a moving picture of that moment."
Emma laughed again. "It's amazing how quickly everyone's mood shifted, though once we found out we weren't in fact under attack. Seems like nothing can dampen the Christmas spirit for long around here this year."
No sooner had the town hall meeting ended, than Emma got a video call from Arendelle. "Emma!" Elsa had said as soon as the call connected. "I'm really sorry about this. I had no idea!"
Emma's brow furrowed, and she exchanged a mystified look with Killian. "You're sorry about what? I'd really like to chat, but we've got a bit of a situation here–like always."
"That's what I've been trying to tell you," Elsa said. "Apparently Anna…"
"Did you get it?" came Anna's perky voice as her excited face popped into frame. "Did you get our gifts? I mean, technically, they're supposed to be for your true love, so maybe I should have given them to Kristoff, but I figured you wouldn't care, even if Storybrooke isn't my True Love. I mean I like Storybrooke, but True Love is kind of a strong term."
Elsa rolled her eyes. "What my sister is trying to say is that she–without consulting me–decided to send Storybrooke the twelve days of Christmas, compliments of Arendelle."
Killian nodded before taking a sip of his own steaming beverage. "It was rather impressive how quickly and efficiently the town was able to rid the town square of the well meaning, if rather annoying gifts once they were assured that there was nothing nefarious going on."
"And can you believe how quickly Granny was able to put that town-wide Christmas party together?" Emma asked.
"This town truly is a wonder," Killian said, draining the last sip of his cocoa before turning his full attention toward his wife, "but I have rather a different idea of how I'd like to celebrate Christmas Eve with my wife than talking about the town."
"Yeah?" she asked, setting her mug on the end table and turning to face him. "Care to tell me what that is?"
He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows before shaking his head. "Oh darling, I don't plan to tell you. I plan to show you."
And he did just that–quite thoroughly, long into the night.
Just before they fell asleep, exhausted and exquisitely sated, Emma heard Leroy's shout far in the distance. "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"